I'm editing chapter 3 of the Family Man like crazy so I thought I would upload one of the many miscellaneous first chapters that I have saved on my computer while I'm doing it. I might continue this but who knows. I have a few chapters done already so I might just upload those. Enjoy.
A bright smile dons my face as I make my way back down the stairs. The crowd has thinned dramatically since I had gone up a couple of hours ago and many of the others that are left are saying their last goodbyes and searching for their long forgotten coats. As I get to the bottom step I scan the room looking for my ride and realize that he is nowhere to be found. Recognizing my sister across the room I began to make my way to her but when she looks up from the conversation she's having and locks eyes with me, I know that she is drawing a line that I am being dared to cross. I continue on my path to her, ignoring the daggers that she's sending my way and come to a stop directly in front of her. She raises her eyebrows at me, suddenly making me very aware of how close the body behind me is.
"Where's Edison?" I ask calmly.
She rolls her eyes dramatically. Oh. The audacity of me. Don't get me wrong, I love my sister but at times like these all of that attitude pisses me off.
"Hello? Are you going to answer?"
She sighs and rolls her eyes purely for affect. She should have been an actress if she wanted to do all of that shit.
"He left, Olivia." She finally answers, staring right at the body that is keeping my back warm.
"What? Why?"
She gives me a dramatic scoff just because she can.
"Because he's finally starting to see all of things I've been warning you about. You're getting married Olivia. Don't you think you should be acting like an adult?"
Now it's my turn to raise my eyebrows. She turns her attention to the beautiful man standing behind me.
"And Fitz," She pauses, gathering her dumbass, irrelevant thoughts. "I love you. I really do. I love what you guys had together, I would have loved you as a brother-in-law but that's not happening now. Don't be that guy. The other guy. Livi's moved on and you need to, too."
I turn around to gauge Fitz's reaction before turning back to my sister.
"Jordan, no one is cheating, okay. Mind your own business." I retort defensively.
"Emotional cheating is still cheating."
There's a pregnant silence after her statement leaving a second for me and Fitz to think over it.
"I'm not cheating. Period. Let it go." I finally reply.
"We're just friends, JK." Fitz adds. "Just friends."
"Yeah? Well this friendship looks a hell of a lot like cheating." She looks both of us square in the eye before continuing. "So much so that it could be misinterpreted by a certain fiancé."
I ignore her altogether and turn to Fitz.
"The party was great, thank you for inviting us." I say softly.
"It was my pleasure. I'm glad you came." He smiles as he speaks; accepting my apology for my sister's less than party like behavior.
"Of course, wouldn't miss it, but we're going to head out now." I say, stepping into his arms and I can see that he completely understands the reason for my hasty departure.
The hug is brief. Mostly because my sister is standing there but also because contact like this reminds us both of times no engaged woman should be thinking about another man. He kisses the top of my head as we let go and moves over to give my sister a halfhearted hug as well and turns back to me.
"I'll see you later, right?" He asks completely unsure if he will or not.
"Yeah. I'll text you. Promise."
I can practically hear Jordan roll her eyes behind me so I turn and grab her arm, quickly dragging her to the foyer where our jackets are hanging.
She looks at me incredulously as if after the scene she tried to cause would make me want to hang around here all night. Luckily, her husband saw us heading towards the door and met us there with the car keys.
"We're ready to go." I say harshly and my very understanding brother-in-law moves to open the door and escort us to the car where everyone is completely silent.
That is until we pull out of the driveway and my sister turns on the light and turns in her seat to glare at me, which I happily reciprocate.
"What the hell was all that about?!" I shout at her.
This bitch better have a good reason for trying to ruin my life but instead of fighting me back with fire like I expected, her expression softens considerably.
"He left, Liv." She replies looking down, instantly aging five years. "And the worst part isn't even the fact that he left."
I'm confused. I thought that's what all this backtalk was about anyway. She reads my expression and then continues.
"Livi, your fiancé left the party that you attended together and you didn't even notice until you needed a ride home."
I look down ashamed, realizing that that was exactly what I'd called Edison when I had gone to look for him.
"Jordi-"
"No, Liv. You need to figure out who the hell you want to be in a relationship with because you can't have both. You can't expect Edison to wait around for you while you're off doing God knows what with Fitz."
"I want to be with Edison!" I shout defensively. "Sorry that Fitz and I are friends. Sorry that Fitz and I are good friends and sorry that we have five years to catch up on."
She rolls her eyes again. I swear that her eyes are going to get stuck up there one day and I'll be the last person to feel sorry for her.
"Yeah? And unless one of you, God forbid, dies you also have the next five years." She states sarcastically.
I sigh.
"Can't you be happy for me? That I found a guy that I love and that Fitz and I are finally in a place in our lives where we can just be friends." I look at her questioningly. "When we broke up I never thought this was possible. Us, being friends. Especially with what it did to his presidency."
Jordan turns back around in her seat to look at the rare Californian rain washing down the windshield.
"I am happy for you, Liv." She says a little bit calmer. "I promise you I am happy. I know what you went through with Fitz and I know that was tough but you can't let your past with him dictate your present with Edison. Notice I said present not future because I honestly don't think there's going to be one."
I make a face at her from the back of the car, and began mulling over her words. She turns around again catching me in the act.
"Liv…"
I can tell by the tone in her voice that this might be the most important thing she says tonight.
"You're really starting to hurt Edison."
And that statement got to me more than anything else she'd said tonight. Throughout all of this I never meant to hurt Edison. I never considered it. Even tonight as I made my way up the stairs with Fitz, I never thought about Edison watching and when we entered his bedroom sharing slightly tipsy laughs, it never even crossed my mind whether the situation was inappropriate or not. Edison was never a factor. I never meant for him to get hurt.
"Really?" I question softly.
"Olivia…if you could have seen his face…" She trails off. "He's really beginning to look at the two of you and how you interact with him."
"Jordi, I don't act any differently with Fitz than I do with Edison."
"I know." She replies. "The problem is that one of them is your ex-boyfriend and the other is your fiancé."
I sigh giving her the benefit of the doubt. I meant that there was nothing more special about the way I interact with Fitz than Edison but she's completely determined to be right.
"What did he say?" I ask. "You know…before he left?"
"He just told me that he was leaving and asked me to bring you home but, Liv, if you had seen his expression…" She stops for a second, gauging my reaction. "He looked absolutely heartbroken."
"He was staring at you and Fitz for a while before he left. It was like he wanted you to notice him. And then Fitz took you upstairs…" Elliott added, corroborating my sister's story.
That's when I knew it was serious. My sister chose a good man in the fact that Elliott wasn't keen on putting his nose where it didn't belong. That was Jordan's job. He's a pretty quiet man as a whole, more content to sit back and observe and he very rarely gives his opinion or his advice. Even to his dear sister-in-law.
"I'll handle it." I say firmly. "Consider it handled."
"You better." Jordan adds as if her two very unnecessary cents are wanted.
I throw her a look.
"I said I would, okay? Drop it."
The car is silent for all of three minutes before Jordan speaks up again.
"Do you love him?" She asks, turning to face me again.
"I wouldn't be marrying him if I didn't." I retort.
"I'm talking about the other one." Elliott says as if he had asked the first question.
Sometimes I forget how linked they are and how much they think alike but the cuteness of their marriage doesn't keep me from getting angry.
"Excuse me?!"
"It's just a question." Jordan mumbles, taking up for him.
"It's a ridiculous question, that's what it is! I'm not even going to dignify that with a response. We. Are. Friends."
I see Elliott rolling his eyes in the rear-view mirror.
"Yeah, well…" He stops in the middle of his sentence.
"'Yeah, well' what, Elliott?" I ask.
"You sure as hell don't look at Abby or Harrison or Huck or we can even bring in some of the friends that you haven't seen for the same amount of time as Fitz like Quinn or Steven," He pauses and takes a deep breath to keep himself from being too harsh with me. "You don't look at any of those people the way you look at Fitz." He finishes.
"Irrelevant."
"Important." Jordan chimes in.
"I already told you that I'm not answering that asinine question." I fold my arms across my chest and sit back in the seat like a petulant child.
"Livi, you know we're going to support you either way. No matter whom you choose, we're right behind you." Elliott speaks up after a moment of silence.
"But you do need to choose." Jordan adds. "Because I doubt Edison is cool with going 50/50 with Fitz…especially when it comes to you."
Jordan takes my hand and kisses it before placing it back in my lap and turning off the car light, effectively ending our conversation.
I sigh and take in the words of my brother-in-law and sister. I know they care and that I should heed their warnings but I also know that what I have going with Fitz is way too good to give up. I also know that I need to prepare myself for the Edison that I am going to come face to face with at the end of our thirty minute drive.
All of the lights are out when I arrive to my parent's house and I can't help but pray to every deity that Edison is already sleeping. I quietly tiptoe through the house and up to my old bedroom where I can tell that my bedside lamp is on. I stop outside of the door for a moment weighing my options. Edison could have left the light on for me in case I got back late or he could be wide awake looking through new government policies and the only way I would ever know would be by walking through that door.
As I slowly open my door, Edison doesn't even look up from his laptop and I'm suddenly wishing I had just gone to the guest room. Better yet, I'm suddenly wishing he had gone to the guest room. I walk straight to the in-suite bathroom without acknowledging him and slowly get myself ready for bed. The hour that I've spent in the bathroom doesn't put him to sleep, though and I know that, as much as I want to, I can't pretend that tonight never happened. So, I pull up my big girl panties and gingerly sit on the edge of the bed.
"Can we talk?" I speak softly hoping to gauge his mood.
He closes his laptop and places the papers he was reading inside of it and sits it on the nightstand. He looks back up at me with his arms folded and I can see on his face that believing he was angry was an immense understatement.
"I'm really sorry about earlier." I start. "You know I love you."
He nods.
"More or less than you love Fitz?" He asks defiantly.
At this moment I am very glad that I hadn't brought up the glass of water that I fixed in the kitchen because it would be all over this gorgeous duvet with that comment.
"Edison!" I say in surprise. "I-it's-more. Of course I love you more."
With that very blatant lie I can hear Satan adding my name to his guest list in big letters right at the top.
"Then I have to ask…" He stops and assesses me for a moment.
"Ask me anything." I say, scooting farther onto the bed.
"What the hell were you doing upstairs with him?" His eyes are blazing as he speaks. "You know, all alone in his bedroom while there was a party going on downstairs."
I sigh, already knowing that my excuse is incredibly lacking.
"We…we, um-"
"You 'um' what, Olivia?" He questions ferociously.
"We just looked at some pictures and video clips from the trail and talked a little bit."
I can see the incredulity on his face so I continue.
"We haven't seen each other since his first term so we just caught up."
"Caught up? Looked at pictures?" He scoffs and shakes his head as he throws the covers back to get out of bed.
"What?!"
"It just looked like a whole lot more than looking at some damn pictures." He says raising his voice a little.
"You think I had sex with him?!" I shout with as much disbelief as I can muster.
"Yes, Olivia, that's exactly what I think."
"So what, you don't trust me?"
"Not anymore." He says it softly, almost like he doesn't want me to hear.
"Why?" I ask him, calming myself down.
"You kn-" He cuts himself off and then turns to exit the room.
"No!" I yell to him. "Don't bite your tongue. What were you going to say?"
"Look Olivia, I know you're sleeping with him." He says in a resigned voice.
"I'm not."
"Then honestly tell me that you don't want to be."
There's a slight hesitation and I can tell that it's caught him off guard. He's not expecting me to be honest with him.
"I want to be with you. I only want you." I whisper as I get off of the bed and make my way to him. "Why can't you believe me?"
"I can't believe you because every time you're in a room with him you eye fuck him like everyone else just walked in on you guys about to go at it."
"Edison that's not true." I deny vehemently.
"No?" He questions sarcastically.
"You're acting like these past few years have meant nothing, like we aren't getting married in a couple of months."
"Oh, I'm sorry for being upset that my fiancé is all over another man. I should have taken that a little better."
"I'm just telling you to look at us. We're standing here screaming at each other. When have we ever yelled at each other?"
He pauses at that and then walks a little closer to me, staring intently into my eyes.
"Don't lie to me, Olivia." He says reaching up to caress my face. "Don't plan this wedding with me if you are in love with another man. If Fitzgerald Grant were anyone other than a former president I would have already hit him, so don't take advantage of my patience. I deserve better than that."
I lean into his hand.
"I know you deserve better. I know. Look, my entire relationship with Fitz was hot and cold. One day we were good and the next day we hated each other." He looks pacified as I continue to speak. "It was just fighting and really good sex and for some insane reason I thought that that was love. That he was love."
His hand drops from my face and he takes a small step back and I realize what I've said wrong. I can't lie. Sex with Fitz is electric, mind blowing, hot, torrid affairs that always leave reeling and wanting more. I meant to say was and left. As in past tense. But thinking about it gives me this feeling that I shouldn't have standing in Edison's arms. Fitz always gave me what I needed, leaving me more fulfilled and satisfied than I have ever been with any man and then right after the afterglow wore off I would have this intense feeling of need and want, like I hadn't been fucked right in years rather than minutes, craving his body like no other.
I can see that Edison is going over what I've just said in his mind. Analyzing it. I also know that the sex comment I just made is going to come back and bite me in the ass. I've never been vocal about sex with Edison. Vocal about it, during it, before it and I've resigned myself to the fact that he'll never fuck me like Fitz does…did.
He nods his head a couple of times and then steps forward to kiss the top of my head.
"Let's just go to bed, okay?" He says with a sigh.
He rubs his hand down my arm and then walks around to his side of the bed climbs in, turning his back away from me.
I climb into bed as well, settling in to turn away from him when he speaks.
"Let's just forget tonight ever happened." He speaks softly in the dark. "I love you and I just want to get past this."
I keep silent because I know that I could never tell him what I'm really thinking. That after he kissed the top of my head I could do nothing but think about the man that kissed me in that same spot a few hours earlier. That for as long as I live I would never want to forget the night that I've had.
"Okay." I reply just as quietly.
Edison rolls over and falls to sleep quickly but I can't help but stay up and think about every decision I've made to get me to this point. To this place in my life where all I can think of is how in love I am with a man while being engaged to a completely different one. I can't believe this is my life. I just keep asking myself: how did I get here?
So, yeah, that's it. I have the 2nd and 3rd chapter already written but I have no idea how long ago I wrote these so I can't even really say for sure where this story was going, however, if there's enough of you that want me to I can try my best to finish it out.
Press that awesome little review button and tell me what you think.