Hello there, I'm Lea Cat with my first ever Bleach story.

Summary: Two fangirls have a talk about Bleach.

Warnings: Spoilers for SS arc.

Insanity
By Lea Cat
11/17/06

"I-Ichi--"

He brushed right by her and went straight to Hanatarou, placing a hand on the trembling 4th division shinigami while asking, "You okay, Hanatarou? Sorry, it turned out I put you in some scary situations by making you go ahead."

"Oh no, not at all, I'm fine." Hanatarou replied.

Rukia didn't turn around as Ichigo approached her. "Rukia." She turned to face him, only to find him not looking at her. "I'm here to save you." She was so relieved to see him alive…she could only stare at him with wide, disbelieving eyes. He glanced at her. "What's with that look?.!" He exclaimed. "I came to save you. Act a little happier."

"Yuri."

"Shut up."

"Oh, come on, stop thinking about Bleach and talk to me!"

The black haired girl huffed and gave her friend a cold glare. "Fine then, Mari, I won't tell you any more Bleach spoilers."

"What?.!" Mari cried, her brown hair temporarily flopping in her brown eyes before flopping away again. "You can't do that! I know you're far ahead, tell me what happens when Ichigo and Rukia meet up again!"

"Episode 41?" Yuri asked. At her friend's enthusiastic nod, she sighed and skipped ahead in her mental replay of the episode.

"So…I'll let you yell at me as much as you want later. After I beat him." Ichigo's gaze landed on Byakuya.

"Ichigo…"

"What? You ain't gonna tell me to back down after I've come this far, are you?"

"But—"

"I'm not backing down!" He interrupted. "I'm not kidding. I came this far to save you. It doesn't matter if you say you wanna face the death penalty…" Ichigo turned to face Rukia. "I'm gonna save you even if I have to drag you away." He glared and pointed an accusing finger while yelling, "From this point on, all your opinions are rejected! Got that, dumbass?.!"

"W-what the hell is that?.!" She spluttered, partially surprised by the statement. "You're ignoring all the rescuee's opinions?.! What kind of tyrannical way is that to save someone?.!"

"Shut up!" Ichigo yelled back, "The one being rescued doesn't get to complain! You just act the part and stand around trembling and say, 'Oh, save me!'" Hanatarou made some subtle calming hand gestures in the background, even as he stared wide-eyed at the scene before him.

"'Oh, save me!' my butt!" Rukia growled and then glared defiantly. "I don't tremble!"

Ichigo only mocked her as she grumbled.

"…and that is how it went." Yuri finished.

"What?" Mari seemed to be in denial.

"What did you want, some sappy love scene from a romance novel?"

Mari thought for a moment before saying, "Well, I guess it's good enough, but I was hoping for something like this…"

"So…I'll let you yell at me as much as you want later. After I beat him." Ichigo's gaze landed on Byakuya.

"Ichigo…" Rukia latched onto him. "Don't go! He'll kill you!"

"I have to."

"But—"

"I came here to save you. I don't intend to leave without you."

"Oh, Ichigo…"

"HOLD IT!" Mari froze in her storytelling. "What the hell?.! They're out of character! If you're going to write a romance, put them in character!"

Mari pouted. "Why? That ruins everything. Ichigo's really mean and hard to make romantic…"

"I don't want to hear about it. I just don't. So don't go any farther." Yuri said. "You know I don't care that much for romance."

"That's just because you don't have hormones." Mari shot back. "Ah…I wonder if there are actually romantic parts in the story…"

Yuri deadpanned. "Maybe if you mail the author…"

A oneshot inspired by a talk with my friend. I hope none of you romantics take this personally...