A/N - I was going to finish my other tags first, but this one is too good not to have some fun with.
For early autumn, Paris had turned out to be colder than he expected. He was glad he'd actually checked the weather before hopping on the last-minute flight, rather than trusting his experience, because normally France in the fall was stunning blue skies and pleasantly warm days.
He would have gone inside the café, but it was crowded and he needed to be alone. He probably should have ordered something to eat, in fact he could almost hear Jack … and let's face it, even Bozer, and making some approving mmmhmm noise from off to the side, Riley, nagging him about it.
Actually, it was Bozer's voice he'd heard in his head when he ordered the bottle of wine he had every intention of drinking all of before he made his first phone call to the professor's office. "Mac, don't let this search for your dad put you in your own head again like you got after all the stuff with Nikki." Mac had insisted it wasn't, that he was fine. Bozer had just raised an eyebrow at him and asked, "Sure. How many miles this morning, Mac?" He'd looked away and then answered honestly that he'd run eight miles. "And you're saying no to breakfast? Get him out of your head and eat your damned waffles."
If anybody knew what Mac being in his own head looked like over his missing father it was Boze, he supposed. He was grateful that Bozer hadn't asked his destination when he'd seen Mac with his carryon bag. He'd just wished him a nice mini-vacation and gone into the lab. That would save him from lying to Jack when he inevitably showed up at Mac's house.
Mac wasn't even sure why, but he didn't want to keep dragging Jack along on this probably futile search. Mac also thought if he found his father and Jack was with him, while Jack might say he just wanted whatever Mac wanted relative to his dad and that was what was important, he was maybe more than an average amount of inclined to punch the guy. Mac didn't want to manage their reactions to each other.
He didn't quite want to admit, even to himself, that he had no idea how he was going to react if he found his father. The guy had basically abandoned him almost twenty years ago, and all this leaving clues and chasing him down like he was the freaking treasure in one of the movies Boze liked to watch on Sunday afternoons was … complicated.
He also wasn't sure how he would respond to having both of them in the same place himself; the man who'd abandoned him when he couldn't yet take care of himself, and the man that never would, not really, even though he knew often Mac was the one to take care of both of them. He felt like every nerve he had was just a little raw. It was wearing him down.
He started playing with his Swiss Army knife. He smiled a little when he used it to open the bottle. The server offered to do it, but he'd just shaken his head. He actually sort of wanted to have this glass of wine with his grandfather, in his own way. That gift, it had been the first thing that let Mac feel back in control after his dad left, since his mom died, really. Sipping his wine, and caught up in his memories about his grandfather and how the man had tried to lift the weight of his father's absence, Mac lost track of his surroundings.
When Jack sat down at the table, Mac nearly jumped out of his skin. He'd booked and paid for his flight and room with one of his cover identities, been assiduously careful not to mention his plans or leave a paper trail. And he'd flat out told Jack that he was just taking a long weekend to rest and relax, maybe sleep in a lot. Getting almost blown up by a nuke and then chased out of the country practically by a hit squad, even if the leader of had sort of flirted with Jack, wore a guy out. Mac thought he'd covered all his bases for Jack to just sit home watching football, drinking beer, and ordering takeout. But here he was in all his glory. Jack Dalton. Clearly prepared for a lecture.
Mac felt his irritation flare. And the worst part was, Jack was right. He hated that. A lot. But he also hated being treated like a kid. "You tailed me from the airport," he said. It wasn't a question. It was more of an accusation.
"I'm just doin' my job, Mac. I'm your bodyguard."
God, it bugged him when Jack put it that way. It was technically true, but Team Security sounded a lot less like he himself was some sort of asset, or, he had to admit, like he was some fragile piece of government property that might get broken. He knew what the reply would be, but he was so pissed off that Jack had followed him, he couldn't help asking, "Even when we're off the clock?"
For the first time, Mac could see that Jack was really angry as he answered. He was doing a better job than he usually did of keeping a lid on it. But he was almost as upset as he'd been when Matty sent Riley on that mission alone. Mac felt his defenses go up at that. Jack saw it and, angry as he was, he tried to soften what he was saying.
Mac hated being treated like a kid. He'd hated it when he still was a kid, so now, even sick or hurt or scared to death, Mac was more likely to close people out than he was to let them in. That wasn't what Jack needed right now. "Look, I know you can blow your own nose, man," he began.
Mac felt his eyes roll as Jack continued. Because the 'I know you're not a kid' speech always came with a 'but', and this one was no different. Mac tried to defend his actions. Infuriatingly, Jack just kind of tore apart his defense. And the worst part about that was he was right again. And he sounded sorry about it.
Mac tried explaining his need to do this alone, but he could tell Jack knew his explanation wasn't honest. Cage might impress Matty with her people reading skills, but Jack was much scarier in that department as far as Mac was concerned. Cage only saw facts about you. Jack saw feelings. That was terrifying at moments like these.
Jack chided gently, "Look, how'm I supposed to look out for ya if I don't know what continent you're currently on?"
Mac's reply was out of his mouth before he could stop himself. "Look, just because I can't find my dad, doesn't mean I need you as a helicopter parent."
Jack had to stop himself from biting his lip. Mac didn't often admit to seeing him that way, but Jack knew he often played father figure to his young partner just like he did with Riley, and no kids had ever been loved more by a parent, he would swear before the throne of the Almighty.
But in some ways Mac needed it more than Riley. Like now. His denial of needing any support was going to get his skinny, reckless butt in a whole heap of trouble if he didn't straighten up. Jack hadn't been sure he was going to tell him about the assassin when he sat down, but desperate times called for desperate measures.
Mac felt his stomach drop at the idea that he could have been so careless. Maybe this was exactly the point though. He was so used to having Jack watch his six, he was sloppy when he had to do it himself. And if history had taught Mac nothing else, it was that at some point, no matter how much somebody says they care, hell, even if they really do, and no matter how hard they try to always be there for you, eventually you were going to find yourself alone. And you'd better be able to deal with that if you wanted to survive. That was more or less what he tried to say to Jack, but without the back story.
Jack could feel himself losing his tight grip on his anger at the kid for putting himself in harm's way like this. His face was reddening and he was getting louder than he'd meant to be. Damn it. That was a surefire way to get Mac into a full walls up mood in record time, and the kid was already building one that would have made the ancient Chinese jealous. He just wanted Mac to understand why he was here. "Your problems are my problems!"
"Not anymore," Mac replied. He needed to end this conversation. Jack was making too much sense, and he just couldn't deal with it right now. He had other things to deal with. He'd be more careful from here on out. That was all.
When he more or less called Jack stupid, he felt bad. He knew better than anyone how smart Jack was. But he knew it was a button he could push right now. Matty was constantly pretending she thought Jack was less that bright and Riley used to pile on quite a bit. Riley had gotten better, but Matty had gone downhill. He wasn't disappointed with Jack's reaction. But he did sit there, quietly fuming for a while, furious with Jack for following him and stirring this all up. And just as furious with himself for letting it happen. He needed to calm down, get his day back on track, and do what he came here for.
For his own part, Jack stalked off down the street and around the corner angrily. Once he was out of Mac's line of sight though, he leaned against the building and took a few deep breaths. He was pretty pissed off, but not really at what Mac had said. Okay, that had stung, but he knew the kid didn't mean it. He was angry that Mac was taking risks like this. And even angrier that the kid didn't seem to think he was worth someone caring enough to do so alongside him, just because it wasn't paycheck related. Jack would have to work on that.
He contemplated just going home like he'd said he was going to, because he knew Mac would be watching out for tails more closely now. Unless he didn't. That was what worried Jack. So, until Mac got on the plane for home, Jack decided to stay and do his job.
As a bodyguard. Then he smiled to himself. And as a helicopter parent.