" Would you like a cup of tea Miss Fallows?"
No Elizabeth, no.
The very thought of food or drink made Elizabeth feel as though she was about to vomit. She had passed on breakfast this morning, a combination of nerves and bad time-keeping preventing her from savouring the delight of her oats. However, this was the Captain here sat before her, she did not want to displease him by refusing any of his offers or advances.
Even if that resulted in her vomiting the meagre contents of her stomach over the side of the ship.
" Ah -Yes, um - yes please sir" Elizabeth gulped, her stomach flipping and flowing with nerves.
Smith turned his attention to the bone chins tea set on his desk, the twinkle in his eye unmissable.
"I understand you wrote to the International Mercantile Maritime Company requesting permission to join my crew as an assistant officer?" He stated, his concentration never fading from the teapot.
Blimey, she thought. He just goes straight in there doesn't he.
" Um- yes?" Bollocks. The girl cursed inwardly at herself for sounding so nervous. Don't give them any reason to believe you aren't worthy of this Elizabeth. Focus.
Smith passed the cup over to Elizabeth. She grabbed it, it's contents spilling over the sides of the cup. A sneaky glance at Smith told her he was amused, not displeased. Reddening, she chastised herself that if she couldn't hold a cup of tea without spilling it how on earth was the line eventually going to think her capable of the responsibility of becoming an officer?
He indicated at her to drink the tea and she complied, trying her best to sip it like a lady, the manners her mother had tried to drill into her resurfacing.
"The Company believe that it would be good for the line to change our regulations in order to fit into our changing world and therefore have decided to allow you to-"
The bone china teacup clattered from Elizabeth's hand and dropped onto the wooden desk below with a distressing thud. Sugary tea trickled down her chin and onto her skirt. Hurriedly, she tried to wipe it away in a very unladylike way which her mother would surely have admonished her for.
She couldn't believe it, the biggest shipping company, the International Mercantile Maritime Company were allowing her, a mere girl to assist the officers on the grandest ship in the world? Her brother would be turning in his grave.
Elizabeth's thoughts of wonder were short lived when she realised Smith was staring at her with his piercing eyes.
Shit. The teacup.
Fumbling about, she tried to pick up the teacup and place it carefully on the saucer. Her cheeks were reddening for the second time in this office and she couldn't bring herself to meet Smith's eyes as she clumsily picked the teacup up.
"As I was saying, we have decided to allow you to assist the officers in their duties aboard the Titanic" remarked Smith, his calloused hands fiddling with the yellower papers placed carefully on his desk.
Elizabeth grinned cheekily and Smith, although startled, smiled politely back.
"This will hopefully increase your knowledge surrounding the maritime industry and help any future applications from yourself to become a White Star Line officer."
Elizabeth's grin grew even wider. She was imagining herself in the uniform, her tie shining against her crisp white shirt, the greatcoat keeping her warm but smart, the leather gloves allowing her to-
"However your application to become an assistant officer was denied by the White Star Line."
It was as though all the life had been sucked out of her. Elizabeth slumped back into her chair, her posture that of a cripple. A hair pin cascaded down the the floor as her head slammed into the headrest. Her mind went blank and she was unable to think of anything intelligible to say. She just averted her eyes from Smith's and glared at the damn teacup.
Smith could sense her defeat and confusion and he shifted uncomfortable in his chair. "The line feels that it would be wrong to employ someone who has had no active experience on an ocean liner."
Elizabeth's glare grew harder.
"You would be limited to what you could assist with, the majority of the voyage you would spend idle."
Smith wouldn't be surprised if the teacup smashed just by the power of the girl's stare.
He cleared his throat. "There would be the risk of a mistake, especially by someone so new to the trade, and we wouldn't want any mistakes on the maiden voyage now would we?"
Smith smiled at Elizabeth in a fatherly way but still she glared at the cup.
The room was silent spare for the shouts of crewmen outside. After what seemed like an age Elizabeth spoke, her voice steely but quiet.
"I have the same training and qualifications as any of your officers."
"Yes Miss Fallows but-"
"So why did you lead me into false hope my telling me I have been allowed to 'assist the officers'?"
Her voice was dangerously quiet, the loathing and hatred seeping out with each syllable. She couldn't understand why Smith would summon her here, raise her hopes only to smash them, along with her dreams of a proper uniform.
" Ah, well" Smith glanced nervously around the room. This was the moment he had been trying to avoid. He wrung his hands together, suddenly finding his fingernails very interesting.
"As I mentioned before, becoming an official assistant officer would not benefit either parties." He began inspecting the veins on his wrist. "You would be unable to fully help with officer duties and would spend the majority of the voyage idle and bored."
He took a deep breath in and Elizabeth sensed this was the part of the meeting she would despise the most.
Smith tensed. "The White Star Line understand that aswell as applying for the job of an assistant officer, you also applied to be a stewardess?"
Bloody hell.
Elizabeth had forgotten about that application. It was the one her mother had forced her to do, said Elizabeth would be better suited "cooking and cleaning like any respectable woman than playing around in a man's world of boats and ships." After many intense aruguements, Elizabeth had comforted herself by thinking that it would be better to at least be on the bloody ship doing any job than stuck at home with them. She was sure she would be able to sneak down to the bridge after she had finished her shift and persuade one of the officers to teach her.
However, she had never really wanted the stewardess job; her mind was set on becoming an assistant officer. The role of a stewardess commanded the same rules and manners that Elizabeth detested, the same rules and manners that had been expected of an upper class girl. To become a obedient woman who cooked and cleaned was the lowest of the low in Elizabeth's eyes- and a stewardess was just that.
So it was with great annoyance that Elizabeth replied "yes sir", her hands picking at the leather on her chair.
Smith shuffled some papers. "The White Star Line is prepared to allow you to assist the officers with their duties onboard the Titanic. You will be mentored by one of my officers and will learn important lessons about the maritime industry."
He paused while Elizabeth tried to hide the grin that resurfaced when she thought about actually being on the bridge.
"However this mentoring and learning will only be offered in one job role."
Elizabeth could see where the captain was heading. There was only one job role suitable for a woman on an ocean liner. Her hands shook as she placed them carefully in her lap, raising her eyes to meet Smith's. She prepared herself for the blow.
Smith smiled pacifically. "Your application to become a stewardess was granted. Therefore we are offering you the job role of a stewardess. However, when your shift has finished or you have spare time, we are permitting you to join us at the bridge and be taught like any assistant officer would."
The silence was deafening. Elizabeth began to slowly process the captain's words.
To call herself 'Stewardess Fallows' was a title that embarrassed and enraged her. She would be little more than a maid, a servant girl whose only purpose was to please the extortionate rich and their extravagant wishes. However, Elizabeth contemplated, hadn't she been a member of the extortionate rich only months ago? Hadn't she too relied on stewardesses to fulfil her demands? Hadn't she snapped and shouted at the maids that were doing their best to please her?
Sighing heavily, Elizabeth thought that life had made a full circle. Only mere weeks ago she had been dressed in silk dresses worth more than a miners yearly salary, the pearls strung about her neck showcasing her wealth. She had sat through 8 course meals, endured countless elocution lessons organised by her mother to try and fool the potential suitors that Miss Fallows was a refined lady. Elizabeth remembered it all. However, the most painful memory was remembering Sam, the way his eyes used to light up with joy whenever he saw her.
Tensing, Elizabeth realised that happy moment was before the drinking started. That was before she felt she had no way out.
And now here she was with an opportunity to do what she had been saying for years, become an assistant officer. Her seriousness on the topic had been subject to futile attempts by her mother and father to stamp out the earnest in which she dreamt of this. Elizabeth had been taken on countless trips to tea parties, smothered by dolls and pretty dresses as her parents tried to steer their daughter away from such a 'masculine profession.' It had all been in vain though, she could almost taste the authority she would command as an officer- obviously not straight away, but there was no way that any experience and lessons learnt on this voyage wouldn't give her an advantage in the industry- and an advantage would be needed as she was a woman, the type of person that was least expected to become an officer.
Glancing towards the window, Elizabeth tried to steady herself and her thoughts. She could see the tops of the magnificent funnels glowing orange in the morning sunlight. The sea salt breeze blew forcefully through a tiny crack in the glass, an intoxicating smell of the ocean wafting through her body.
There was no doubt that the Titanic was a marvellous ship; even her own parents and Sam had talked in awe about the "unsinkable ship", with its private promenade decks and salt water swimming bath. Elizabeth could picture herself on the bridge, body aching after a long shift serving the first class but her mind awake and hungry for maritime knowledge.
Being taught as an assistant officer, though not official, was sure to distress her parents. Elizabeth imagined her father spluttering angrily at the breakfast table as he opened her telegraph, mother trying her best to not let it be known to society that Miss Elizabeth Fallows had ran away to sea and become a stewardess and an officer-in-training.
The thought alone made Elizabeth smile.
There was nothing she wanted more in the world than to be on a ship. Being a stewardess would at least be better than her current state of affairs, lodging in a sleazy inn and using the vice of alcohol every night to remove the ghosts of her past.
She thought earnestly of the bridge, the quiet yet powerful atmosphere commanded by her fellow officers. Longingly, she thought of the knowledge she would gain from such respectable officers, the stories they would tell.
Most of all, Elizabeth imagined the look on the male passenger's faces when they realised that a woman was assisting the running of the ship. It was one step closer to what she had been dreaming of since she was a child.
Smith sensed the girl was ready to answer. He lit a cigar and placed it between his lips, wondering just what his crew would make of the arrangement if she was to say yes.
" Miss Fallows?"
Elizabeth grinned cheekily once more at the captain of the Titanic.
"Yes, I will accept your offer."
The excitement seeped through her voice. Elizabeth was just about to stand up before realising the authority the Smith now held over her.
"Sir."
Hey everyone! I've had this idea for quite a while now but i have been too scared to actually write it incase no one ever read it and I'd feel like a failure... But hey ho!
It would mean the world to me if you reviewed it, just so I could know whether you like it or not!
I'm very excited to write this and i aim to get the next chapter up within a week hopefully...Elizabeth will meet Lights for the first time!