Rose: Puts ear on a pregnant belly
Sasuke: "Rose, don't you think that's a little rude?"
Rose: Looks up "huh?"
Sasuke: "I SAID DON'T YOU THINK IT'S RUDE"
Rose: "Hardly"
Sasuke: "…"
Rose: Looks up again "You don't mind do you?"
Masked Person: "Not at all"
Sasuke: "…Why are YOU pregnant?"
Masked Person: "I'd tell you but then I'd have to remind you bout what we did 5 months ago"
Sasuke: "…oh" Small blush
Rose: "I know what you did 5 months ago!"
Sasuke: "Hn that still doesn't explain the pregnancy"
Rose: "true but its sooo Kawaii! Doesn't Naruto-kun look cute with a preggy belly?"
Sasuke: mumbles "yes"
Naruto: removes mask to reveal himself a blush on his cheeks
I Dont Own Naruto!
"Its quiet…too quiet" He shifted on his feet nervously looking around the room, bright sky blue eyes scanned the room looking in each corner, under each piece of furniture and every conceivable nook and cranny.
"I don't think she's here" The man jumped as his assistant stood beside him.
"Mari, you scared me" He ran his hand though long blonde spikes; Mari looked at the note board in her hands.
"Your reports are on your desk, there's a meeting with the elders in an hour, and your wife says her feet hurt, yet she can't see them to do anything about it." He chuckled at the last line knowing full well his wife's problem as she liked to remind him of it nearly every single waking moment.
He moved to his desk carefully looking under it and checking his seat for any traps or tricks, satisfied with his search he placed himself on his chair. He ran another hand through his hair, the other hand picking up the Hokage hat that sat in front of him.
-End of the day-
"Finally!" He said as he wiped his brow, looking up as Mari entered his office
"Sir, all the reports are done for the day. The elders wish to see you again tomorrow at the same time, and your wife is waiting for you outside with your sister." He groaned, thinking about his little sister. He moved his hands to cover his face, groaning.
"Ok, ok I'll see you tomorrow."
He raised a hand to hold the rim of his hat, and with a sharp tug, both the hat and himself were pulled forward.
Bang. His head connected with the desk.
Startled, he stared blankly at his hand, his other moving to join it on the hat's rim. He paused briefly, before using both hands to pull sharply down, this in turn caused both his hands and his head to have a rather personal meeting with the wood of his desk.
Again.
He looked up at the rim of his hat, his eyes catching a small note
'That's what you get for corrupting my wardrobe Otouto'
"Argh dammit Asa!!"
"Achoo…" A long blond haired girl jerked foreword and sneezed hard.
"Ah some one must be talking about you, Asa-chan" The woman next to her chuckled, moving her hand to rub her swollen stomach.
"I bet it's that bimbo brother of mine." She watched the woman's hand across her stomach
"Isn't calling him a bimbo a bit contradictive? You do look like an almost perfect copy of him. Other than the fact that you're a girl." She paused. "And maybe about a foot and a half smaller than him…" Asa looked at her; closed one eyes and stuck her tongue out, causing the other to laugh.
Asa looked down at herself; she pulled on her kimono style top, the orange material stretching as she did, kicked a leg out, and flared jeans followed the moment effortlessly, small sandals peeking out from the trousers rim. She placed her hands on her hips, and her face took on a thoughtful look.
"Come on. You're making me sound like I'm just the fourth with boobs…I don't really look like that…right?"
"Pfft, that's a funny thought if I may say so myself. You do resemble the fourth, but your face is much softer, and your eyes are a darker, more sapphire blue compared to his sky blue ones and obviously you're a girl, oh and your about 8 or 9 years his junior." She listed off, taking great amusement from the growing pout on Asa's face.
"Pah. Sky blue eyes? More like baby blue. What a wussy…really, Kana, I don't know what you see in my brother."
Kana laughing harder at the expression on Asa's face. The laughing stopped abruptly as the woman stilled, a hand flying to her stomach.
"Are you ok?" Asa looked at her worriedly.
"Ah it's nothing, just a particularly good kick to the stomach." She chuckled.
"Can…can I feel?" Asa twiddled her thumbs looking shyly at Kana.
"Of course you can. Asa, don't be so shy, I wont bite…well not hard anyway." Asa smiled widely at her, Kana moved her hand placing it over Asa's, and guiding it to the place she had last felt the baby kick. Kana looked down at her stomach with a fond smile.
"Naruto, say hello to your Obasan, Asa" Asa laughed, looking up at her, but keeping her hand on the swell of her stomach.
"Just be sure to make that O-basan, and not ba-san."
"Ha! I'll remember" Kana gasped slightly, as she felt another strong kick right where she had placed Asa's hand.
"…" Asa stared wide eyed at her hand "wow…that's was…I don't know really what to say"
"How about 'sorry I glued your hat to your head'?" Both Kana and Asa looked at the new voice behind them, standing there was the bane of Asa's life, her brother Arashi Uzumaki.
"Oh, Erm, hi?" Asa smiled weakly before moving to run away. Unfortunately for her, her brother had already moved to grab the collar of her shirt and picked her of the ground, until her feet were dangling inches above the floor.
"You are not going anywhere, Asa Uzumaki, except on a mission." A smirk grew on Arashi's face, and Asa gulped.
That smirk could mean only one thing.
He had already devised his revenge.
"You can't give me a mission! Not so close to my nephew's birth!!" Asa whined struggling in his grip, cursing him for being taller, and stronger than her. Teme!
"I can, and I will." He fished around in the inside of his long flaming white coat for a moment, before finally pulling out an object, grinning madly, and held it in front of Asa's face.
"Huh? A paperclip?" Asa glared at it, to see if it did anything more than just sit there. He's joking, right? He can't be serious.
"Yes, a paperclip. You are to deliver this paperclip to Baki, a sand Shinobi from Sunagakure, the village hidden in the sand." At this sentence, both Asa's and Kana mouths jarred wide open.
"I have to deliver a PAPERCLIP!?! To SUNA?!?! NOW?!?!? You're sending me, a chuunin almost a jounin for Christ's sake, to deliver a paperclip??" Fire flickered dangerously in her sapphire eyes, the air around them rising, burning up and prickling at the back of his neck.
Her Chakra's leaking into the atmosphere again. It always does that when she's pissed off at something… Arashi sweat dropped. …usually me…
"I have to agree with her Anata. It does seem a little…demeaning. And inappropriately timed." Kana looked to her husband worriedly, knowing how the two could end up if left alone. Which is how she ended up married to Arashi in the first place. She befriended Asa first, then met Arashi, became their medium and buffer, and fell in love with the blonde brother.
"I don't care, a mission is a mission, and being the current Hokage, you have to listen to me." Arashi grinned, pointing at her nose with an arrogant glimmer to his eyes. He instantly saw the look of pure malice coming from his sister, and suppressed the need to shudder.
Ok maybe it is an abuse of my powers, but no one, not even her gets away with messing with my hair! He thought to himself, dropping Asa's collar and letting her land on the floor.
"Humph" Asa snatched the paperclip from his hands and glared at him. "You think that's bad, just you wait and see what happens if I don't make it back before Naruto's born!!" She hissed, and pointed directly at Kana's stomach. "You! Stay right where you are." She pointed up at Kana's face. "You! Keep those legs closed!" She then whirled round to stab Arashi in the chest with her finger pettily. "And You! Start praying that I calm down before I get back, to witness the birth of my nephew, and don't decide to SHAVE your head BALD, POUR SPIDERS in your underwear draws, DUNK you in PURPLE dye, steal all your clothes and CHASE you through all of Konoha, BUTT-NAKED!"
Asa glared at Arashi her blue eyes narrowed dangerously, while he merely grinned at the expression on her face.
He handled his sister like he would a wild beast.
As long as she can't sense your fear, you're fine.
"Anata, are you sure about this?" Kana looked to her husband worryingly, begging him with her eyes to reconsider. But he wouldn't.
"Maa, maa Kana, I'm sure Naruto will wait a few days for Asa-dobe." He moved to sit next to her, an arm looping around her waist.
"Argh, stop with the mushy crap before I'm ill! Well looks like I gotta go!" Asa moved towards Kana, kneeling so she was level with her enlarged belly. "Chotto matte Naruto-kun. I'll be back from your evil father's mission soon." Asa sent a cheeky glare up at the said father, and quickly returned to gazing at the large swell of her sister in law's stomach, and her beloved nephew within it. Kana chuckled, noticing Asa talking solely to Naruto.
"Asa-chan, you best hurry ne?" Kana smiled at the look of annoyance on Asa's face.
"Otouto, I leave both Kana and Naruto in your hands, they better be okay when I get back."
"You have my word as Hokage, Asa-CHAN." Arashi over emphasized the end, but he smiled non-the less, his arm still secure around Kana's wide waist. Asa looked back, mock glaring at Arashi before her face broke out in the biggest of grins.
"Ja-ne minna. I'll be back soon, Dattebayo!" And with that, her feet left the ground and onto the nearest rooftop. The wind pulled at her long blonde pigtails as she silently leaped to her apartment.
"Shuriken…check, ninja wire…check, spare chuunin vest…check, civilian clothes…check, bird seed…check." Asa sighed rolling off the check list out loud. She looked around her apartment.
It was small, but cosy, easily liveable for one person. She looked to her dresser, and a recent photo looked back at her. It was a photo of herself, her brother and her sister in law who of which had a very prominent baby bump. Just like now. Asa smiled as she picked up her bag and placed it on her back.
"You better wait for me Naruto-kun. I've waited all my life for you."
Asa had given up on finding a husband and settling down to have her own children. It was impossible now.
A year ago, she'd been on a nasty mission, along side her brother, against A-rank assassins from the rain village, using the outskirts of the Konoha forest as a hide out. They attacked travellers on their way into the village, making it look like Konoha Shinobi were responsible for the muggings and murders.
They'd cornered them simply enough…but Asa had been cornered too.
She placed her hands over her lower navel, and frowned.
In the blood thirsty battle, she'd been stabbed with a kunai, straight through one of her ovaries. It had a poison coating, which sent her straight to the ground, and once the mission was over, straight to the best medical-nin in Konoha.
The poison was crude, and used by the enemy because it had an almost instantaneous effect, knocking out the opponent as soon as it entered the bloodstream.
However…it had side affects.
She couldn't feel her legs for 3 months.
Her vision blurred for at least 2.
She projectile vomited in the morning for weeks…
And both her ovaries were made sterile for the rest of her life.
No…no babies for Asa…never a mommy…
She could still remember the moment of utter shock when the Medical-Nin told her she would never have children.
I must have screamed and cried every day I was in that hospital…so much pain…
Asa sniffled, and rubbed her eyes.
But if Kana had children, she could still be an aunt.
Never a mommy, but I can still be a loving aunt to a beautiful nephew. Naruto.
It's all up to you now, Kana. I can't have children. She walked to the door of the apartment, making sure along the way things were in order around the place. As she reached the door, she gave her apartment one last look before shutting the door, a small clink was heard as she turned the key and locked it.
Walking through the halls, she smiled as she greeted the other occupants, though she was soon out into the cool evening air. Asa looked around herself, seeing if there was any other around, noticing none she moved her hand to her mouth her teeth, biting at the flesh of her thumb.
"Kuchiyose no Jutsu!" She thrust her hand on the ground, sealing marks appearing on the floor, a poof of smoke following.
The smoke began to clear, unlike her previous summon this one stood many feet above Asa's own height,
"Konnichiwa Kiyoshi" Asa hollered, one of her arms waving upwards, a large chocolate brown hawk stood in front of her.
"What do you want?" The bird's tone was cold and flat, and Asa winced a little.
"Ouch Kiyoshi, a little colder and I would have frozen." Asa moved the pack on her back, securing it a little tighter, before jumping up. Her feet caught on some of the feathers, and concentrating, she used her Chakra to get a grip. Asa walked calmly up, until she reached the back of Kiyoshi's neck.
"Again, what do you want?" The voice was louder now she was nearer his face, yet it still contained that eerily cold tone.
"Well, I have a mission and need to get the sand country ASAP! And since you're the strongest and most powerful flyer I know, I thought I'd ask you to take me." Her tone was sweet as she spoke 'hard stuff mister Kiyoshi' just needs a little buttering up and he's as soft as putty, she thought evilly.
"Humph, since I am the best flyer…ever…it only seems right I take you. That Blondie would probably get you stuck in some sand dune if you were to run with him." Kiyoshi ruffled his feathers for a moment
"Also I'm sure I might be able to find some random snack for you when we get back." While Asa hinted at the treat, she reached to her neck, where a pair of green goggles hung loosely. She pulled at them, placing them over here eyes and tightening the straps, fully well knowing the speeds that Kiyoshi could travel.
I hope Arashi doesn't mind if I borrow a cow, wait he might have a COW
She began laughing at her own joke, though Kiyoshi just huffed.
"Hold on" Was the only warning Asa got, as Kiyoshi spread his wings, large chocolate coloured appendages spanned far out to the side, as he began to beat them slowly. After the second or third beat, he was off, taking Asa high up into the sky and leaving Konoha in the dust as they soared.
Rose: "I am the almighty authoress of doom!"
Sasuke: "well miss 'I am the almighty authoress of doom' where the hell am I?"
Rose: reads fic "oh guess your not here yet!"
Naruto: kick
Sasuke: "hey that hurt Naruto"
Rose: "No DUH, you realize at this point he can really kick"
Kana: "I agree!" holds stomach
Sasuke: "wait I thought Naruto was the pregnant one, not some one pregnant with Naruto"
Rose: shrugs "oh well, I changed it DUH, my god Sasuke are they sure you're a genius?"
Sasuke: "Hn"
Rose: "I mean come on this little convo, has little, to nothing to do with the story"
Sasuke: "then why do you do it?"
Rose: "so I can do this" glomps Sasuke
Sasuke: "Argh, Fan girl glomp"