AN: Okay, so for those of you who have no observation skills, I write in English, and Death Note is Japanese. While I really want to know it, I don't know Japanese, so, by process of elimination, I must not own Death Note.
Now, with that out of the way, on to the story…
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I had no idea why I was there.
I just was.
It was all Watari's fault, really. I'd finally solved a case I'd been working on for a very long time and so he thought I should be treated.
Yeah. Some treat. Why couldn't he have just have gotten me a large cake or something? I mean, really…a county fair?
I remember that day, unfortunately…
I walked into the fairgrounds and looked around. All I saw at first were rides after rides after rides, but then I looked closer. I saw, to my delight, many stands selling funnel cakes, popcorn, cotton candy, fried dough, and other delectable sweets. I started toward the delicious goods.
Three hours after my arrival, I had gotten to know the stand workers very well. For example, I knew that the cotton candy salesman had two daughters, one six and one fourteen, and was getting a divorce. He didn't know how to break it to his girls, for he loved them both very much. He also owned a dog and three goldfish, and he wanted a cat, but he was allergic. He was forty-seven years old, lived approximately 617 miles from his parents, and was an only child. His main job was fixing cars at a local garage.
Of course, he never told me any of this. I spent a lot of time analyzing his every move, and what he did led me to that conclusion.
I am 99.9867439 percent sure that I am correct.
But the 0.0321561 percent is just because he never told me.
Anyway, I was very content as I was, people-watching and eating. The occasional child would point at me and say, "Look, mommy! That man is dressed funny!" At that time, the parent would shush the child and lead him or her away. One seven-year-old boy had approached me and asked, "How come you no got no socks on?" I simply replied, "Well, why don't you have a bra on?" The boy looked at me confusedly and I said, "Exactly. I'm not wearing socks for the same reason." The boy started to cry and ran away. I didn't chase. What help could I be at this point?
I was eating my seventeenth funnel cake when Watari approached me. "Why, I brought you here to get out. You could eat junk food back at the hotel." he began pushing me to "XTREME," the fastest and most intense roller coaster in the fair.
I began to protest, but my mouth was full, and I found it rather difficult to speak. By the time I could swallow, I was at the head of the line and Watari had flashed my pass.
Many people believe I have no dignity left, but they are wrong. I wasn't about to start screaming to let me go now that I'd gone through the line. My only option was to ride XTREME.
I climbed on board and wrestled with the lap bar for a few minutes, as it didn't take to kindly to my sitting preferences. After a while, I had to admit defeat and sit down "normally". As I did, I felt the strange wave of slowness that came every time I did that. I didn't like it when my deductive abilities dropped like that.
I couldn't escape once the lap bar was in place, so I timidly waved to Watari as the ride took off.
I don't like excitement. I'm an armchair detective for a reason.
Climbing the hill was okay, but then suddenly, we reached the drop and...
"AAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!" Everyone seemed to be screaming but me. I was staring at the whooshing colors off to the side, wondering how the hell Watari had forced me to do this...
We reached the third corkscrew, and I noticed what had been happening all along without my knowledge. My stomach was slowly churning, and looking at the colors whizzing by only seemed to remind me of vomit. I was sure my pale face was paler. I was sweating a bit.
I was about to puke.
Please just let this ride be over soon. Please, please, please...
I shut my eyes and thought about my last case to take my mind off of my predicament. (There was a young couple in the seat in front of me.) Bad idea. The case ended up with me having to go in disguise. To a hospital. To visit a patient with a terrible flu.
That made me sicker. Now, it was not a question of if I was going to throw up, but when...
Very suddenly, I felt different. I opened my eyes and realized that the ride had stopped. With clammy hands, I lifted the bar off of my lap. I climbed out, slouching even more than normal. I was nearly doubled over.
Finally, I couldn't hold it anymore. I heaved all over the man in front of me. His girlfriend gasped and he swore very loudly and angrily, turning toward me, eyes shooting daggers.
I learned to run that day.
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AN: Did you like that? Hope you did…and I hope I didn't gross you out too much. I got nauseous writing it. I really hope you have a strong stomach, unlike L…
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