{Sorry for wonky writing in the first paragraph, I like to start off with a monologue.}

Its funny, looking back it all really started with that kiss, yeah we've had more kisses than I could possibly count between then and now, but that's besides the point, as I was saying I can remember the exact moment I knew Elsa was the one for me. It was that kiss, and ever since then she's kinda become my obsession, in the healthy celebrity kinda at like, 'Wow she's actually talking to me.' Kinda way, I mean sometimes I forget that I myself am also a celebrity that people get starstruck with, but not what I was talking about. Focus Anna, okay so well it all started that first day of shooting my music video, I had recently broken up with my lame ex boyfriend and the company thought it would be a brilliant idea to shoot this as my coming out video. I had met Elsa before, she was a drop dead gorgeous model for the Victoria Secret company, we had met at one of the fashion shows, we kinda had a heated make out session in the bathroom, man that was glorious I can still remember her tongue against my- wrong place wrong time Anna! Well we had met like I said, we kinda had a long distance school girl crush thing going on, but she understood my position, and respected that at the time I couldn't be open at the time.

One thing you kinda have to understand is that I'm teribly socially awkward, I may be a well known musician but that does not change the fact at night I go on my secret tumblr account and blog about my various nerdy fandoms, like Disney, Marvel, and my not-so secret obsession with shipping obviously {to me} really gay girls together, one of which, recently was Elsa and myself. So the socially awkward me was on camera in a very girly frilly pastel pink blouse, and a high waisted floral tight skirt that hit halfway down my thigh, with an Elsa in a pair of rather cute cut off shorts and a crop top jersey that showed of her flat stomach; she was like 3/2 taller than me, she was practically an Amazonian woman that had flowing blonde hair and beautiful crystal blue eyes, she always was gorgeous, shit focus Anna! Well anyways we were on camera in front of a white screen and we were told to just pretend like the cameras weren't there and Elsa being the charming woman she always was said "So then where's the bed and Netflix" she was obviously trying to calm my nerves because we were supposed to be kissing each other, and each time she leaned in I pulled back laughing and giggling in nervousness. So eventually it just came to her telling me to close my eyes and just block out all of the sounds in the background and to just focus on her. So my song started to play and I started to mouth the words before I was met with a welcoming force against my lips as Elsa pulled me in with her hand holding the back of my head, and her other hand on the small of my back, now thing got more heated than I or my camera men would say but Elsa would proudly brag around the studio about what happened. You probably don't want to hear about i- ohh you do? Well I wasn't quite prepared to describe it but I guess I will.. At first it was small soft gentle kisses, and after a while when we had both forgotten about the cameras rolling, I grabbed at her sleeves as I stood on my tip toes, opening mouth to allow entry to the tongue that made me weak in my knees, Elsa gripped at the fabric at my side, the fabric wrinkled happily under Elsa's fingers as she pulled me into her body as physically close as she could without our bodies becoming one. Elsa tended to be a very hungry woman when it came to physical relationships, she craved and needed to be touched and to touch someone, her hands ravaged all over my body, her favorite part to grab particularly was my bottom, which at that point her hands had claimed very well as she easily dominated me in a battle of our tongues, for a while it's just that until a certain point in which either of us make very short but needy movements as we desperately try to form one body it seems.

I'm getting side tracked again darnit! Stop distracting me alright? Well anyways, I knew from that moment on that I was with the woman I wanted to be with, I'm not sure when that moment clicked for her, or if it has yet, but I think so, I'd like to think so anyways. She was worth any backlash I might receive, our months of sneaking around had come to a stop, we kissed in public, we snuggled in movie theaters, we played footsies under tables at restaurants and it was absolutely great. We were so narrowed in on each other that we forgot who we were and for once we were normal people with normal lives, it didn't hurt that Elsa got to bring home products from her company, but we had become one soul distributed in two different bodies. We, like every other couple in the universe, had our ups and downs, the ups were magical parts in our lives that we cherished very closely and our downs were horrible to live through, they were dark times of jealousy and anger and yelling and throwing dishes across the room. We had times where we cried from happiness, cried from sadness, cried from anger, not a lot of people understood it, us, like we were this thing that was whole and pure at one moment and in the next we didn't want to be anywhere near each other. A lot of people don't understand, what its like to deal with a broken person like myself, Elsa understood, she helped and helps in ways I can't even fathom to think of.

Now that I've told you when I knew she was meant for me, let me tell you the moment I knew my life was changed by her, yeah I could say the moment I met her which is kinda true I mean there was that whole-what did I say about distracting me? No the moment my world changed because of her was not when we met believe it or not, it was the long train ride together and with all of the other girls, but I had my own separate room away from everyone else. It wasn't any bigger than their rooms I just wanted a room to myself because in honesty I am a hot mess without the hot without my make up on. I had these freckles that appeared all over my body and I had these awkward gross acne scars all over my face and I was blind as a frickity frackity bat, I had these thick rimmed glasses and really super thick lenses that made me look like the loser I was. I also had this lame disney princess blanket I had with me because I often got home sick so I carried that Ariel blanket with me on any tour I went on, I was devastated when Elsa found it but she didn't even react to it, she just smiled and sat down on top of it and continued to make her infamously smooth moves and tried to slip into my pants, and before you say anything, nothing happened that night.

Wait, what was I talking about? Ohh our train ride, after I had awkwardly mentioned that I myself am a rare unicorn {unicorns are the symbols for virgins okay don't judge} we had cuddled for the rest of the night, the next morning was the confusing tricky part that I still don't quite understand to be honest, I woke up first and just watched her sleep peacefully. She woke up about half an hour later than I did but that was fine, I was greeted with a rather passionate good morning kiss and I wasn't one to complain with Elsa's kisses, there were a few moments of cuddling before a rather unexpected "I love you." Spilled out of Elsa's mouth like it just came out without her own mouh's consent. I didn't know what to say, I mean I just met her and I just came out to myself so I wasn't sure I was prepared to say the same thing back to her just yet. But thank Yuri that at that precise moment Karlie was calling a breakfast call and I ordered my usual vegetarian breakfast that was always delicious, but when I asked Elsa wanted, she said she wanted nothing, and left silently but she looked upset. I didn't blame her I mean she just said I love you to some one for the first time and it was met with a stone cold silence, I let her be by herself for a while but after a little bit I walked over and we went the rest of the day together after how I felt and everything was fine except I broke my glasses at the bridge of my nose and I still have yet to get those buggers fixed, mostly because Elsa thinks they fit my whole nerd-chic look I have going on.

Now you know how we started, I mean the way she talks about makes me seem like a majestic beast but in reality I'm just a dorky beast. She's the majestic gazel and I'm just a baby giraffe learning to walk for the first time. Jeez I could probably talk about Elsa all day if you let me, she's flawless, don't get me wrong she's still a total dork for Hollstein like anyone else is but she's a pretty dork and she's my pretty dork. Ohh gosh I should probably end it here before I get side tracked again. Well bye !