A/N. I was listening to Bonnie Riatt's song "Wounded Heart" and thought of Celebrian.
I wish I could say I'm brilliant enough to own any of these characters, but alas, they all belong to J.R.R. Tolkien.
I'd love to know what you think! Reviews are welcome :)
The lady Celebrian, named for her father, Celeborn the Wise, stood among the autumn trees. Though the season was still early, the leaves had barely begin to change; winter's chill was rooted in her heart. She knew that if she stayed, she would fade away completely, but goodbyes are never easy; not even when they won't last forever.
Her parents were standing nearby, stoic and solid, like always, and Celebrian went to them first. "Naneth," she felt tears well up in her eyes as her mother's loving arms encircled her.
"Oh, my child," Galadriel's voice was as old as the ages. "How I wish I could remove this burden from you."
Celebrian rested her head against her mother's shoulder. "I know," she said simply.
When her mother released her, she stepped into her father's waiting embrace. "Ada," her voice broke as the tears came in earnest.
Though her father was close to seven thousand years old, he still had the strength of one half his age. For one sweet instant, in his arms, Celebrian felt like a young elfling again, as if the pain and grief of the previous year had never overtaken her. He cradled her head against his chest and Celebrian squeezed back with all her might.
"Take care of them," she whispered. "They'll need you." She stepped back and took the hands of both her parents. "I worry for my children," she said. "And Elrond."
"We will," her mother promised with a squeeze of her hand. "We love you, blessed one."
"I love you," Celebrian met their eyes in turn before releasing their hands and turning toward her daughter.
"Arwen," she held her arms out and her daughter ran to her.
"This goodbye isn't forever," she said as she pulled Arwen's hair back from her face. "And the next time we'll see each other, I shall be well again."
"I know, Naneth," her grown daughter's tears ran down her cream colored cheeks. "I know," she repeated. "I love you."
Celebrian placed a feather-light kiss on Arwen's forehead. "And I you," she said before releasing her.
Arwen stepped back and allowed Celebrian to take the few steps necessary to reach her sons. They looked so much like their father, but they had her eyes. Those pale, blue eyes used to be full of life and laughter, but since the day they'd found her battered and broken, a coldness had replaced the joy. Their laughter didn't ring through the halls of Rivendell anymore, and only Arwen could occasionally make them smile. Celebrian feared for them more than the others because they'd somehow decided that the series of events that had led to this day was their fault.
Celebrian rested each of her hands on one of their cheeks and both automatically leaned into her motherly touch.
"I'm so proud of you," she told them. "You're just what every Naneth hopes her sons will be."
Eladin's eyes were closed against the pain, but Elrohir turned to her with tear-filled eyes.
"I'm so sorry, Naneth," his voice was barely above a whisper.
She pulled them into her arms and though they were much taller than she was, they managed to rest their heads on her shoulders. "I'm alive because of you," she told them. "And we will see each other again." She tried to smile. "In the mean time, I want you really live," she said. "Fall in love, make me a grandmother."
Neither said a word and she could feel their tears through the sleeves of her gown. She kissed each one before releasing them.
The last goodbye was the hardest. Elrond, her rock, her love, was weeping unashamedly as he watched her say goodbye to her children. He blamed himself as well for, great healer that he was, her emotional scars were so deep that not even love could heal them. It was his encouragement that finally stopped Celebrian from wasting completely away and take the ships across the sea in an effort to heal.
But now that the moment had come, she could see the heartbreak in his eyes. They'd been together for hundreds of years and in love a few before that. Her life before theirs together was well remembered, but distantly, as though she'd been a different elf then and only when she'd married Elrond had she become who she was supposed to be.
She took his hands in hers. "I love you," she said. "I will always love you."
"And I will always love you," he said. "Please get well."
"Please come to me when you can," she said, though she knew it could be as long as their marriage already has been, but she'd wait. And wait.
"I will," he took her face gently in her hands and kissed her lightly. It was the sweetest, saddest goodbye Celebrian had ever imagined. She released his hands and stepped toward the boats before turning and facing him once more.
Elves were usually very poised in public, displays of affection were reserved for the bedroom. But Celebrian rushed back to Elrond and reached up to pull his face down to meet hers. She kissed him in a way that she hadn't been able to since she'd returned home a year ago. She kissed him with all her heart, every little broken piece of it.
Elrond returned the kiss with every fiber of his being, and of that kiss was born the first real seed of hope in Celebrian's heart. She now knew she was going to get better. Before she could stop herself, she boarded the boat.
She couldn't look at them as the boat left the harbor, but she knew they were standing there, watching her float away. Finally, when she was about twenty yards out, she turned and watched them fade away.
Her father had wrapped his arm around Arwen while holding his wife's hand with the other. She could clearly see the grief on their faces as they mourned her crossing. Grief and guilt had driven her sons, her strong warrior sons, to their knees, but their eyes stayed focused on her.
Elrond was a step or two away from the group, and Celebrian still saw the hope reflected in his eyes. The pain was still there, she knew it always would be. But at least now there was room for hope.
There's always room for hope, she reminded herself as she lifted her hand in a slow wave.