"Reid if you want to be mad at someone be mad at me," Hotch stated. Reid seemed to fall silent and shifted his weight, his hazel eyes drifted away from the intimidating brown ones staring at him.

"I can't" he whispered softly. "I didn't come to your house crying for ten weeks," he murmured walking past Hotch their shoulder just barely brushing each others. Hotch watched out of the corner of his eye as the young brunette fled the scene.

"Great," JJ said tearfully. Hotch looked back at the now red eyed blonde profiler who was wiping her eyes. "Now he hates both of us."

Hotch let out a tired sigh rubbing the bridge of his nose, "No, he doesn't," he breathed out. He lowered his hand, "We all know how Reid handles things JJ," he reminded earning a nod from the recovering blonde. JJ let out a shaky breath, "I...I know how Spence acts, but it doesn't make me feel any better."

"JJ you can't take it personally-"

"How can I not take this personally Hotch!" she interrupted. Hotch looked at her calmly, "..You're right...this is about as personal as things get.." he trailed off. "But there was nothing you could have done to make this situation better..Reid will come to understand that soon enough." he reassured.

JJ let out a deep breath crossing her arms and nodded. Hotch looked over his shoulder and was disappointed to find that the brunette was nowhere in sight now. He wordlessly turned around and walked out of the room leaving JJ to herself.

...

Reid breathed heavily as he walked down the hallways of the building. He didn't know where he was going and he really didn't give a damn at the moment. He felt like he had just been kicked in the stomach and it made him sick. He felt betrayed, lied to, stupid, untrusted, and absolutely alone.

And he wanted nothing more then the sweet blissful euphoria that a needle would bring to him.

He rummaged through his pocket frantically, desperately gripping onto the one year sobriety coin that he always carried with him. But even that wasn't bringing him much strength, the overwhelming need for the drug that he had been a slave to was growing harder to ignore.

He had always had problems trusting other people, he had trouble interacting period with others. This team had made him feel safe, made him feel wanted and accepted for once in his life. They had been like family to him and he trusted them...he trusted them with his life.

And now it was all being thrown back in his face.

Like some kind of cruel sick joke.

He felt stupid. He hated himself for letting himself trust someone else this much. For dropping his guard so much around other people. He couldn't believe he had been so naive.

He began to unconsciously pick up his pace needing to get far away from everyone. He saw a door to his left marked "Roof". He quickly opened the door and started up the staircase.

...

Hotch glanced around as he walked down the halls.

/Now..where the hell did he go?/

He knew Reid felt angry and upset, because that was how Reid handled things like this. The other thing he knew was that Reid was going to try to get far away from everyone too. So all he had to do to find Reid was find the most secluded spot in the building.

Although with all the cops running around here he imagined that seclusion was a hard thing to find.

...

Reid finally reached the top of the staircase and eagerly pushed open the door. He breathed heavily as he walked onto the roof. Finally...it was perfectly silent.

Reid pushed his back up against the wall and carelessly slid down to the ground. He furiously rubbed his hands over his face as if trying to rub some kind of sense back into it. He shivered despite the warm temperature and felt tears heating his eyes.

He slowly began to wonder how hard it would be to find a drug dealer in Oklahoma.

He didn't even look up when he heard the door opening beside him, he knew after what he said Hotch would come look for him.

It was quiet though for a long time, neither tried to say anything to one another or make contact.

"You know that wasn't true," Hotch finally said. Reid tried to resist the continuous sting in his eyes, "What wasn't?" he asked feigning stupidity. Hotch's gaze hardened a bit.

"You know that you came to me crying for a lot longer then just ten weeks."

Reid pulled his knees to his chest and buried his face in his arms.

"...I know I did.." came to muffled shaking response.

...

Hotch sat up upon hearing a rapping sound on his door. He stood up and strode over not bothering to look into the peephole, already knowing who was behind the door. He opened it to see a very distraught looking brunette staring back at him.

The two stood there looking at each other for a moment before Hotch made a motion with his head ushering the boy inside. Reid walked inside sniffling and shivering, "I-I-I'm really sorry for c-coming over here, Hotch," he stammered as the older agent closed the door behind them.

Reid's eyes were red and his face was flushed from crying; tears were starting to grow rapidly in his eyes.

"I-I just couldn't s-stay a-at home. A-And JJ wasn't-"

He was immediately stopped by a hand grabbing his chin. Teary hazel met dark brown causing another silence to come over the two.

"..We're not at work Spencer," Hotch said suddenly. Switching over to using Reid's first name changing the mood of the room. That was the only signal that Reid needed to latch onto the unit chief.

Hotch let out a soft sigh wrapping his arms around the shuddering profiler, "You know you don't have to be sorry for coming here."

Reid's fingers curled around the fabric of the man's shirt as he buried his head against his chest. "I can't b-believe that she, she's gone Aaron." Reid sobbed out. Hotch frowned his face twisting in momentary grief as he pushed back the guilty sensation building in his chest.

JJ had told him that Reid had been coming over more and more often. And each time he seemed to be getting worse and worse. Hotch could relate to how she felt, it hurt to see Reid this broken up over something that wasn't even true.

He couldn't name all the times he wished he could just tell him that it was a lie and that she was really alive.

Hotch pushed back the guilty feeling and focused solely on Reid. He stroked the genius's shortened hair, rubbing the back of his neck.

"Ssshh sshh you're okay. I've got you." he murmured comfortingly. "I-It's so hard A-Aaron," Reid whimpered into his shirt. The older agent frowned sympathetically, "I know it is baby..I know."

Reid choked on a sob as he lifted his head slightly earning the dark haired agent's attention. Reid seemed to falter as he tried to speak.

"I-I...Aaron.." he whispered in a small voice. Hotch leaned down stroking the boys cheek with his thumb, he kissed the side of his mouth gently, "What is it angel?"

The younger boys lip began to quiver, "I..I.." his voice nearly cracked. "I've be-been craving again."

Hotch widened his eyes drastically. He had always been aware of Reid's drug addition in the past, but he also knew that Reid was clean now. He had been clean for over a year, he remembered that Reid now always carried around his sobriety coin for reassurance in case he ever felt he was slipping.

"Spencer, you haven't -"

"No no!" Reid said louder shaking his head. "I-I haven't taken any o-of it. I just..r-really wanted to," he stated with difficulty.

Hotch carefully cradled the others face in his hands, "Spencer..you know that Dilaudid never made anything better," he reminded gently. Reid hiccuped and nodded in a sort of ashamed understanding. "It only makes it worse, you know that."

"I can't help it!" Reid nearly yelled at him. He started sobbing in earnest pressing his face against the man's shoulder again. "It just hurt's so much." Hotch tightened his grip around the agent and rested his chin on top of his head.

"You'll be okay baby. Everything will be okay." he promised rubbing his subordinates back. "Sshh I'm here. You're okay shh." he hissed into his hair.

"I-I want to b-b-believe you," Reid whimpered out.

Hotch stroked the boys hair gently, "Everything will be okay," he promised kissing the top of his head.

...

"H-How could you- you, you!" Reid sputtered out angrily. "Spencer, you know I love you. You don't know how hard it was keeping that from you," Hotch explained kneeling down in front of the boy.

"Do you know how stupid I feel right now," Reid cried into his arms. Hotch frowned pityingly, he laid his hand on top of his lovers head and gently began rubbing his hair.

"Why would you feel stupid baby? You weren't the only one who didn't know," he said softly. Reid shook as he picked his head up. His eyes were red and his hair was tousled, his cheeks were streaked with tears and flushed.

"No, I feel stupid for trusting all of you," he stated bitterly. Hotch widened his eyes incredulously, "Baby, why would you feel stupid for trusting us?"

"Because!" he spat rancorously. "I trusted you all and it ended up getting thrown back in my face!"

Hotch frowned guiltily, "Angel, if I could have told you I would have," he explained.

"Then why didn't you!" he asked desperately. Hotch grimaced at the harshness of his partners words. "Spencer, I.." he trailed off unsure of what to say.

Reid suddenly wrapped his arms around the older agent and sobbed wholeheartedly into his shoulder.

"I just w-want this to be over Aaron," he sobbed. Hotch kissed the boys head and stroked his hair.

"Soon..soon," he assured. Reid whimpered against his shoulder, "I just want you to make it better..like you did before," he whispered softly.

"I can do that," he murmured against his hair. "Sshh it's alright. You're okay angel." he cooed softly.

"I still don't know how I'm supposed to believe you Aaron," Reid whispered. Hotch rubbed soothing circles on the genius's back, "Just trust me Spencer."

Reid slowly relaxed against his lovers form and silenced. The intense longing for Dilaudid grew fainter and fainter. Reid nuzzled into the warm embrace his lover provided him with and rubbed his head against the nape of his partners neck. "I can't ever stay mad at you."

Hotch smiled gently against the boys hair, he slid his hand to the back of his head and pulled the boy closer to him, "Don't worry Spencer..." he started quietly. Reid blinked when he felt familiar fingers wrap around his chin; tilting it upwards.

He smiled dazedly up at the dark haired profiler. His eyes slipped closed as Hotch leaned down.

"Everything will be okay."

END

SHIT! I have not posted in a long ass time. So sorry about that I've been going through a whole lot a shit including being sick, school, and total lack of inspiration! Luckily season 7 is on bringing my a plethora of new idea's. And omg i saw Proof and i fell in love! And i actually wrote this well! sadly the end got totally fucked up and im soooo sorry. But i guess it's a bit expected anyways im so glad to be able to post something finally! And there's this other fic im working on still...i dont' know lately my idea's have been running a little dry so for realz if any of you...my KICK ASS readers...have any idea's I am all ears. And of course i'd give credit and what not. But on another note this was my interpretation of Proof..i like it. lol and by the way in this Reid actually has season 7 hair but I don't care what anyone else says in my mind Hotch will ALWAYS look like how he did in season 1! Any ways please send me some ideas and PLEASE REVIEW!