p class="MsoNormal"It has stopped raining. Thank goodness, I murmur as I step off the train. The unease that was twisting my stomach around when the rain started pouring hard leaves, reluctantly, as if waiting for another sign of a rainstorm so it can torture me again./p
p class="MsoNormal"I went away after high school and I haven't looked back since. Until now. Everything seems different. The town doesn't seem smaller or bigger, just different. I almost don't recognize it. I'm not entirely sure I'm ready to be back here./p
p class="MsoNormal"At home, my mother cooks a welcome home meal, my father works on the greenhouse, my older sisters bicker and Maybelle talks. She's in high school now and she tells me about her friends, and the teachers. There is one thing she doesn't tell me, though, and I don't know how to ask. /p
p class="MsoNormal"Terabithia. Terabithia. It has been so long that the word sounds so strange bouncing off in my head. Terabithia. A ridiculous name, how have we managed to believe in it for so long? It's a kid's fantasy place, really nothing but a forest filled with things that have been long since destroyed. Like the pickup truck that has grown ferns. Or the tree house. The tree house that saw no life until she came./p
p class="MsoNormal"I slept in the couch that night and woke up with the sun draped across my body, and reflected off the floors and the dull furniture, giving them a glow. A memory teased me then, of a day when the sun touched golden walls and danced. And another, when she collected its glow and kept it in her purse./p
p class="MsoNormal"Without thinking, I cup my hands and catch the sunlight in it. I close it tight and hold it in my pocket./p
p class="MsoNormal"Belle is in the living room watching television and I join her./p
p class="MsoNormal""What?" she says./p
p class="MsoNormal""What?"/p
p class="MsoNormal""You look like you're about to say something."/p
p class="MsoNormal"I hesitate, not sure how to go about the question. I want to sound casual, indifferent. Like it's a strange family relative I don't really care about but it would be rude not to ask./p
p class="MsoNormal""How are the Terabithians doing today?" It sounded strange and utterly ridiculous, more so when spoken out loud. It didn't make sense./p
p class="MsoNormal"Maybelle rolls her eyes and trains her eyes on the show. "Do I still seem five to you? I haven't been there since forever, Jesse."/p
p class="MsoNormal"Stupid. Of course she doesn't go there anymore. There is no Terabithia. There are no Terabithians. There are no flying warriors, no Dark Master, no squargles. No friendly giants, trolls or the troll hunter, Prince Tyrion. At least not anymore./p
p class="MsoNormal"I will myself not to go but I soon find myself grabbing my coat and running, desperately chasing someone who isn't there./p
p class="MsoNormal" /p
p class="MsoNormal"The creek is dry and the leaves are falling. It has made a carpet on the bridge I built years ago. It's been broken in the edges but seems safe enough to pass through. The little sign above once said Nothing will crush us, now it has faded into unrecognizable lines. I slowly walk on and I don't even see the truck anymore. The whole place doesn't seem familiar at all. I don't know where I am, where I'm going and how I'll ever find my way back. But I keep walking, not minding anything, just letting my feet lead me to a trail they were once perfectly familiar with. It must have been an hour or two or five. And when I look up, it's there. The tree house. the tower. The tower that once held the Dark Master's prisoners who couldn't do anything but rattle their chains in misery. The tower that we made our palace, where we were attacked so many times by creatures sent forth by the Dark Master./p
p class="MsoNormal"I look around and the trees have grown taller I can barely see the sky. That's when I remember the sunlight I collected. I take it out of my pocket and when I open my fist to let it out, it shines through the tower, to the tiny window and illuminated everything inside. And then I see her./p
p class="MsoNormal"She's smiling at me, pink lips curled over her closed mouth. Her hair, more golden than the sun, rustling slightly in the faint breeze. Her eyes, grey, and alive. Completely, strangely, wonderfully alive. She is the only thing that is making sense in this place. She is more real than anything, more real than the sun and the trees and the family I have back in the house. She is the only one that hasn't changed. There she is smiling and I want the image to last./p
p class="MsoNormal""What took you so long?" she demands in a voice I have forgotten, yet it is a voice so familiar I know I have been hearing it every day of my life./p
p class="MsoNormal"It takes me a moment to answer, and when I do, it is with a voice I have long since heard as well./p
p class="MsoNormal""I'm sorry, I woke up late," this voice of a young boy says. I climb the tower with small, chubby hands and feet. And I know that these aren't the hands of a 25-year-old man but it doesn't feel strange at all./p
p class="MsoNormal"I reach the top and Leslie is sitting there, looking out the window to the trees and the sky. I sit beside her and ask, "How are the Terabithians doing today?"/p
p class="MsoNormal""Oh, they're very busy." Her voice drops to a whisper. "The Dark Master is stirring. Lately, there have been intermittent attacks on some of the tree top houses. There's been talk about some citizens missing."/p
p class="MsoNormal"I just listen and watch her talk about the trolls and the warriors and what the Dark Master has been up to. When she's done, I say "Looks like trouble is brewing once again."/p
p class="MsoNormal"She looks at me and a worried look crosses her face. "What's wrong?"/p
p class="MsoNormal""I'm just concerned. These are dark times in Terabithia, Leslie. And I think they really need their Queen."/p
p class="MsoNormal"Her smile comes back. "Don't be silly. I'm always here, Jesse. I've always been here."/p
p class="MsoNormal"I went away after high school and I haven't looked back since. Until now. Everything seems different. The town doesn't seem smaller or bigger, just different. I almost don't recognize it. I'm not entirely sure I'm ready to be back here./p
p class="MsoNormal"At home, my mother cooks a welcome home meal, my father works on the greenhouse, my older sisters bicker and Maybelle talks. She's in high school now and she tells me about her friends, and the teachers. There is one thing she doesn't tell me, though, and I don't know how to ask. /p
p class="MsoNormal"Terabithia. Terabithia. It has been so long that the word sounds so strange bouncing off in my head. Terabithia. A ridiculous name, how have we managed to believe in it for so long? It's a kid's fantasy place, really nothing but a forest filled with things that have been long since destroyed. Like the pickup truck that has grown ferns. Or the tree house. The tree house that saw no life until she came./p
p class="MsoNormal"I slept in the couch that night and woke up with the sun draped across my body, and reflected off the floors and the dull furniture, giving them a glow. A memory teased me then, of a day when the sun touched golden walls and danced. And another, when she collected its glow and kept it in her purse./p
p class="MsoNormal"Without thinking, I cup my hands and catch the sunlight in it. I close it tight and hold it in my pocket./p
p class="MsoNormal"Belle is in the living room watching television and I join her./p
p class="MsoNormal""What?" she says./p
p class="MsoNormal""What?"/p
p class="MsoNormal""You look like you're about to say something."/p
p class="MsoNormal"I hesitate, not sure how to go about the question. I want to sound casual, indifferent. Like it's a strange family relative I don't really care about but it would be rude not to ask./p
p class="MsoNormal""How are the Terabithians doing today?" It sounded strange and utterly ridiculous, more so when spoken out loud. It didn't make sense./p
p class="MsoNormal"Maybelle rolls her eyes and trains her eyes on the show. "Do I still seem five to you? I haven't been there since forever, Jesse."/p
p class="MsoNormal"Stupid. Of course she doesn't go there anymore. There is no Terabithia. There are no Terabithians. There are no flying warriors, no Dark Master, no squargles. No friendly giants, trolls or the troll hunter, Prince Tyrion. At least not anymore./p
p class="MsoNormal"I will myself not to go but I soon find myself grabbing my coat and running, desperately chasing someone who isn't there./p
p class="MsoNormal" /p
p class="MsoNormal"The creek is dry and the leaves are falling. It has made a carpet on the bridge I built years ago. It's been broken in the edges but seems safe enough to pass through. The little sign above once said Nothing will crush us, now it has faded into unrecognizable lines. I slowly walk on and I don't even see the truck anymore. The whole place doesn't seem familiar at all. I don't know where I am, where I'm going and how I'll ever find my way back. But I keep walking, not minding anything, just letting my feet lead me to a trail they were once perfectly familiar with. It must have been an hour or two or five. And when I look up, it's there. The tree house. the tower. The tower that once held the Dark Master's prisoners who couldn't do anything but rattle their chains in misery. The tower that we made our palace, where we were attacked so many times by creatures sent forth by the Dark Master./p
p class="MsoNormal"I look around and the trees have grown taller I can barely see the sky. That's when I remember the sunlight I collected. I take it out of my pocket and when I open my fist to let it out, it shines through the tower, to the tiny window and illuminated everything inside. And then I see her./p
p class="MsoNormal"She's smiling at me, pink lips curled over her closed mouth. Her hair, more golden than the sun, rustling slightly in the faint breeze. Her eyes, grey, and alive. Completely, strangely, wonderfully alive. She is the only thing that is making sense in this place. She is more real than anything, more real than the sun and the trees and the family I have back in the house. She is the only one that hasn't changed. There she is smiling and I want the image to last./p
p class="MsoNormal""What took you so long?" she demands in a voice I have forgotten, yet it is a voice so familiar I know I have been hearing it every day of my life./p
p class="MsoNormal"It takes me a moment to answer, and when I do, it is with a voice I have long since heard as well./p
p class="MsoNormal""I'm sorry, I woke up late," this voice of a young boy says. I climb the tower with small, chubby hands and feet. And I know that these aren't the hands of a 25-year-old man but it doesn't feel strange at all./p
p class="MsoNormal"I reach the top and Leslie is sitting there, looking out the window to the trees and the sky. I sit beside her and ask, "How are the Terabithians doing today?"/p
p class="MsoNormal""Oh, they're very busy." Her voice drops to a whisper. "The Dark Master is stirring. Lately, there have been intermittent attacks on some of the tree top houses. There's been talk about some citizens missing."/p
p class="MsoNormal"I just listen and watch her talk about the trolls and the warriors and what the Dark Master has been up to. When she's done, I say "Looks like trouble is brewing once again."/p
p class="MsoNormal"She looks at me and a worried look crosses her face. "What's wrong?"/p
p class="MsoNormal""I'm just concerned. These are dark times in Terabithia, Leslie. And I think they really need their Queen."/p
p class="MsoNormal"Her smile comes back. "Don't be silly. I'm always here, Jesse. I've always been here."/p