Neverending Sorrow
By: Broken8
Disclaimers: I'll never own Weiss!!:'(
Notes: //blah blah\\ are memories or flaskbacks, ((blah blah)) are dreams or nightmares
Warnings: confusing, boring, poorly written, ...
1. Questions and Flashbacks
Ken stuggled to open his eyes when he finially awoke to the blinding light flooding his room. Wait this didn't feel like his room. He also felt cold. A shiver ran through his body. Ran, where was Ran? Probally in the shop already. No, something wasn't right, nothing felt right. God his head hurt. Prying his eyes open again he realized part of what was so wrong. He was in a hospital bed. Why was he here? What had happened? Where was Ran? Was he okay? So many questions and yet no answers came to him. Another question came to mind though. Why couldn't he remember? Well he wouldn't put up with this much longer. Lifting his head off the pillow pain shot through his body mainly specifying in his left leg. A cry of agony peirced the silent sterile walls of winding hospital corridores. He lay his head down instantly, scared of the pain that might come again. This motion caused a sudden shear pain but it died down quickly to a low ache. Eyes still hazy from the sudden simultaneous movements he watched two, three, four nurses stumble into the room. Eight eyes stared widely at the brunette as he struggled to put the pain aside long enough to find the answers to his never ending supple of questions.
Gritting his teeth together he let out a slow breath. "Why am I here?" Again he tried to lift his head up but that was a mistake. Instantly he was hit with a wave of intense pain. Letting out another cry of pain he pressed his head into the pillow trying desparitly to clear the ache in his body. Just after his second yelp he was being force-fed sedatives by a nurse. He felt better after they started to work but he was still confused. Questions blurred, twisted, and formed inside his head again. He would try this again. "Why am I here?" No one said a word. Why wouldn't they tell him what was going on?
"I think you need some rest sir," another nurse came up to him from the other side and stuck a needle in his arm.
"I need... to... know..." Before he could say anything in his defence he slipped into unconsiousness.
This time he woke up confused there was no light through that window except from the street lights in the parking lot. He remembered the pain that came from moving that morning and didn't try to sit up right away. Curiously he tryed moving his head to the side. When no pain comes he lifts his head slowly. Nothing. Think Dammit! He mutters sourly to himself. Cursing silently he gives up his quest for memories.
The door creaked open startling Ken and making him jump slightly. A white figure drifted to the end of his bed and looked at the charts there. Without even glancing towards the sitting form on the bed he exited the room again. The brunette just stared after the doctor for awhile before shaking his head. What did he remember? Well he remembered everything that had happened a year ago.
// "Ken, I... I think... I think I'm in love with you." after that Ken could only stare which made the usually bland eyes fill with pain and disappointment. "I'm sorry Ken I just couldn't keep from not telling you anymore it was killing me inside not to know what your reaction would be so I just had to..." He couldn't help himself. That man was so beautiful, espiecialy when he showed emotions in those wonderful amythest eyes. He had stood up and taken two steps towards the rambling man whose gaze was fixated on the floor. Placing his hand on the redhead's cheek was like an off button to his incoherent mumbling. Aya's head turned to look at the shorter man with confussion and longing written on the normally blank face. Ken couldn't stand it any longer. Bringing himself up to Aya's face he dove into the feelings he had wanted to experience for a long time now.\\ That's right, he remembered that, how could he forget. Three weeks after that evening they become lovers. He remembered alot but his memories end two months ago. What had happened that he can't remember and where is Ran now? If Ran cared so much like he knew he did why wasn't he here now? His head hurt from trying to find the answers. He needed help, he needed Ran. "Ran" a tear rolled down his cheek as he pictured his koi's beautiful, flawless face. Right now all he needed were those strong protective arms to make all his pain and confussion evaporate inside him. Sleep replaced ever tear that ran down Ken's face until he was entirely engulfed in the numbness that is slumber.
Morning hit him like a sledge hammer, hard. Pain pulsed through his entire being. He couldn't quite decide what he would blame for his uncomfort. He knew that the reason he was here had something to do with it. He also knew that his head was pounding from the hours he had spent crying last night. If there were any loud noises right now the brunette knew his head would explode. Which was why the knocking on the door that started was torture. Instinctively Ken's hands flew up to hold his head. The creaking sound of the door opening sounded multiplied a thousand times. "Ken? Are you awake?" The voice boomed inside his head even though it was in reality not much louder than a whisper. It was also the softest of familiar voices. "Ken? Please wake up soon."
"I'm awake Omi," He turned his head to looked into those shocked but happy eyes. There was something else in the blue orbs in front of him. Misery? Omi also looked as if he had been crying for days. "What's wrong? Why am I here anyway?" Omi's eyes started to well up with tears at the questions. As soon as the first of many tears hit the blondes cheek he was in Ken's arms, which hurt him but he had learnt to deal with pain and swallowed it for the time being. Omi cried for sometime before a nurse came in and stated that Ken needed rest and that he would have to come back. Just as the door closed behind the small assasin he remembered he never got answers to his questions. It'll have to wait untill later though. Omi would be back later, after all the time could only be about noon.
"But he didn't remember," he didn't open his eyes and it was obviously a good idea becuase no one seemed to have noticed that he was awake.
"That's what the nurses said too. Appairently he is suffering from minor amnesia. This is normal after a major surgery though. He should have his memory back by tomorrow," was this doctor talking about him? He had to be. After all this was his room and the other voice was Omi's.
"Do you think he would remember sooner if we talked to him?" Yohji? Three people now. Please let Ran be here too, Ken pleaded with all his heart that the redhead be there and okay.
"I don't know if that would work but I think it would be better to let him remember on his own. After all he has alot to deal with. Didn't you mention that they were lovers?" were? What the hell was that supposed to meen? What did he have to deal with? "Come on. I think we better let him sleep a bit longer." Three pairs of footsteps were heard walking towards and through the door, leaving Ken alone again to rest but this time he knew he wouldn't find any answers for the rest of the day and night.
(("You have leukimia." The image of a doctor with sad eyes flashed before him. "You need a bone marrow transplant."
"I'm the only matching donor! I care to much for you to not do this!" The picture changed to a yelling Ran and a crying Ken.
"Your saying there is a good chance your heart might not be able to take the surgery?" Yohji was now asking Ran with a deep worry in his jade eyes.
"That's right but please don't tell Ken. He would never let me go into surgery," thats was true. He wouldn't have let Ran go into surgery if he knew that.
"Don't leave me Ran. Don't let them rip us apart. I don't ever want to leave you, please don't leave me." A single tear caressed Ran's cheek. Holding Ken tighter in his arms he admited to himself that he might not ever see the former soccer player who had brought so much joy back into his empty life again.
"I'll always be with you Ken. I'll always be by your side. No matter what happens I'll be with you. I love you Ken nothing could keep us apart," rivers of tears cascaded down Ken's cheek and into the redhead's t-shirt.
"I love you with all my heart Ran. Don't ever leave me."
Ran was standing in his hospital room now. He was standing right beside Ken's bed. There was something wrong though. He saw Ran there but it didn't fell like he was really there.)) "Ran!" sitting up imediatly the frantic brunette scaned where his koi had been standing. No one was there. It had all been a dream but it had been something else too. Could it have been all his memories comimg back because he remembered it all now. He had been dignosed with leukimia and Ran had been a matching donor. The last thing he remembered was having to go into surgery. Ran had been in the next room also having surgery. He pushed back the covers and looked down at his leg. There was a scare on the inside of his left leg. Had Ran gotten amnesia after the surgery too and thats why they hadn't seen each other? Maybe the doctors didn't want him to see Ran because he hadn't been able to remember. He would definately talk to Omi or Yohji about this in the morning.
~-~-~TBC?~-~-~
Oh my god! What happened to Ran! *gasp*! Well that sucked. If you disagree with me or even if you agree with me please review this story. Trust me if I decide to continue this story it will get better. At least I hope so. You will never believe who starts to love Ken! Well you probally will because it's pretty predictable but after this chapter you won't. I'm not gonna say who it is though. I can be so evil.
BTW I have no idea on how bone marrow transplants work or if people can get amnesia after a surgery but I'm gonna pretend that what I wrote is right for the sake of this fic. So don't beat me up about it okay?
By: Broken8
Disclaimers: I'll never own Weiss!!:'(
Notes: //blah blah\\ are memories or flaskbacks, ((blah blah)) are dreams or nightmares
Warnings: confusing, boring, poorly written, ...
1. Questions and Flashbacks
Ken stuggled to open his eyes when he finially awoke to the blinding light flooding his room. Wait this didn't feel like his room. He also felt cold. A shiver ran through his body. Ran, where was Ran? Probally in the shop already. No, something wasn't right, nothing felt right. God his head hurt. Prying his eyes open again he realized part of what was so wrong. He was in a hospital bed. Why was he here? What had happened? Where was Ran? Was he okay? So many questions and yet no answers came to him. Another question came to mind though. Why couldn't he remember? Well he wouldn't put up with this much longer. Lifting his head off the pillow pain shot through his body mainly specifying in his left leg. A cry of agony peirced the silent sterile walls of winding hospital corridores. He lay his head down instantly, scared of the pain that might come again. This motion caused a sudden shear pain but it died down quickly to a low ache. Eyes still hazy from the sudden simultaneous movements he watched two, three, four nurses stumble into the room. Eight eyes stared widely at the brunette as he struggled to put the pain aside long enough to find the answers to his never ending supple of questions.
Gritting his teeth together he let out a slow breath. "Why am I here?" Again he tried to lift his head up but that was a mistake. Instantly he was hit with a wave of intense pain. Letting out another cry of pain he pressed his head into the pillow trying desparitly to clear the ache in his body. Just after his second yelp he was being force-fed sedatives by a nurse. He felt better after they started to work but he was still confused. Questions blurred, twisted, and formed inside his head again. He would try this again. "Why am I here?" No one said a word. Why wouldn't they tell him what was going on?
"I think you need some rest sir," another nurse came up to him from the other side and stuck a needle in his arm.
"I need... to... know..." Before he could say anything in his defence he slipped into unconsiousness.
This time he woke up confused there was no light through that window except from the street lights in the parking lot. He remembered the pain that came from moving that morning and didn't try to sit up right away. Curiously he tryed moving his head to the side. When no pain comes he lifts his head slowly. Nothing. Think Dammit! He mutters sourly to himself. Cursing silently he gives up his quest for memories.
The door creaked open startling Ken and making him jump slightly. A white figure drifted to the end of his bed and looked at the charts there. Without even glancing towards the sitting form on the bed he exited the room again. The brunette just stared after the doctor for awhile before shaking his head. What did he remember? Well he remembered everything that had happened a year ago.
// "Ken, I... I think... I think I'm in love with you." after that Ken could only stare which made the usually bland eyes fill with pain and disappointment. "I'm sorry Ken I just couldn't keep from not telling you anymore it was killing me inside not to know what your reaction would be so I just had to..." He couldn't help himself. That man was so beautiful, espiecialy when he showed emotions in those wonderful amythest eyes. He had stood up and taken two steps towards the rambling man whose gaze was fixated on the floor. Placing his hand on the redhead's cheek was like an off button to his incoherent mumbling. Aya's head turned to look at the shorter man with confussion and longing written on the normally blank face. Ken couldn't stand it any longer. Bringing himself up to Aya's face he dove into the feelings he had wanted to experience for a long time now.\\ That's right, he remembered that, how could he forget. Three weeks after that evening they become lovers. He remembered alot but his memories end two months ago. What had happened that he can't remember and where is Ran now? If Ran cared so much like he knew he did why wasn't he here now? His head hurt from trying to find the answers. He needed help, he needed Ran. "Ran" a tear rolled down his cheek as he pictured his koi's beautiful, flawless face. Right now all he needed were those strong protective arms to make all his pain and confussion evaporate inside him. Sleep replaced ever tear that ran down Ken's face until he was entirely engulfed in the numbness that is slumber.
Morning hit him like a sledge hammer, hard. Pain pulsed through his entire being. He couldn't quite decide what he would blame for his uncomfort. He knew that the reason he was here had something to do with it. He also knew that his head was pounding from the hours he had spent crying last night. If there were any loud noises right now the brunette knew his head would explode. Which was why the knocking on the door that started was torture. Instinctively Ken's hands flew up to hold his head. The creaking sound of the door opening sounded multiplied a thousand times. "Ken? Are you awake?" The voice boomed inside his head even though it was in reality not much louder than a whisper. It was also the softest of familiar voices. "Ken? Please wake up soon."
"I'm awake Omi," He turned his head to looked into those shocked but happy eyes. There was something else in the blue orbs in front of him. Misery? Omi also looked as if he had been crying for days. "What's wrong? Why am I here anyway?" Omi's eyes started to well up with tears at the questions. As soon as the first of many tears hit the blondes cheek he was in Ken's arms, which hurt him but he had learnt to deal with pain and swallowed it for the time being. Omi cried for sometime before a nurse came in and stated that Ken needed rest and that he would have to come back. Just as the door closed behind the small assasin he remembered he never got answers to his questions. It'll have to wait untill later though. Omi would be back later, after all the time could only be about noon.
"But he didn't remember," he didn't open his eyes and it was obviously a good idea becuase no one seemed to have noticed that he was awake.
"That's what the nurses said too. Appairently he is suffering from minor amnesia. This is normal after a major surgery though. He should have his memory back by tomorrow," was this doctor talking about him? He had to be. After all this was his room and the other voice was Omi's.
"Do you think he would remember sooner if we talked to him?" Yohji? Three people now. Please let Ran be here too, Ken pleaded with all his heart that the redhead be there and okay.
"I don't know if that would work but I think it would be better to let him remember on his own. After all he has alot to deal with. Didn't you mention that they were lovers?" were? What the hell was that supposed to meen? What did he have to deal with? "Come on. I think we better let him sleep a bit longer." Three pairs of footsteps were heard walking towards and through the door, leaving Ken alone again to rest but this time he knew he wouldn't find any answers for the rest of the day and night.
(("You have leukimia." The image of a doctor with sad eyes flashed before him. "You need a bone marrow transplant."
"I'm the only matching donor! I care to much for you to not do this!" The picture changed to a yelling Ran and a crying Ken.
"Your saying there is a good chance your heart might not be able to take the surgery?" Yohji was now asking Ran with a deep worry in his jade eyes.
"That's right but please don't tell Ken. He would never let me go into surgery," thats was true. He wouldn't have let Ran go into surgery if he knew that.
"Don't leave me Ran. Don't let them rip us apart. I don't ever want to leave you, please don't leave me." A single tear caressed Ran's cheek. Holding Ken tighter in his arms he admited to himself that he might not ever see the former soccer player who had brought so much joy back into his empty life again.
"I'll always be with you Ken. I'll always be by your side. No matter what happens I'll be with you. I love you Ken nothing could keep us apart," rivers of tears cascaded down Ken's cheek and into the redhead's t-shirt.
"I love you with all my heart Ran. Don't ever leave me."
Ran was standing in his hospital room now. He was standing right beside Ken's bed. There was something wrong though. He saw Ran there but it didn't fell like he was really there.)) "Ran!" sitting up imediatly the frantic brunette scaned where his koi had been standing. No one was there. It had all been a dream but it had been something else too. Could it have been all his memories comimg back because he remembered it all now. He had been dignosed with leukimia and Ran had been a matching donor. The last thing he remembered was having to go into surgery. Ran had been in the next room also having surgery. He pushed back the covers and looked down at his leg. There was a scare on the inside of his left leg. Had Ran gotten amnesia after the surgery too and thats why they hadn't seen each other? Maybe the doctors didn't want him to see Ran because he hadn't been able to remember. He would definately talk to Omi or Yohji about this in the morning.
~-~-~TBC?~-~-~
Oh my god! What happened to Ran! *gasp*! Well that sucked. If you disagree with me or even if you agree with me please review this story. Trust me if I decide to continue this story it will get better. At least I hope so. You will never believe who starts to love Ken! Well you probally will because it's pretty predictable but after this chapter you won't. I'm not gonna say who it is though. I can be so evil.
BTW I have no idea on how bone marrow transplants work or if people can get amnesia after a surgery but I'm gonna pretend that what I wrote is right for the sake of this fic. So don't beat me up about it okay?