Yay...This is also 'Gabriel Cunningham's' request.

Dr. Cunningham's Office

"Geez- that guy is a pain..." The 'Master of Deduction' announced aloud to his computer with no mercy for his patient as he entered the room. Thank god he had enough symptoms to finish off the diagnosis- he had no intention whatsoever to question his 'painful' patient again.

"Dr. Cunningham, the patient has not yet inflicted any physical damage-"

Aargh- there goes RONI again, mouthing off about every single word he said. "I was referring to mentally, RONI..." Gabriel reached above his desk for his jar of aspirin he desperately depended on daily. He shook the case several times but heard nothing. "Great, I'm out..." He returned to his bothersome computer, "And since you're a robot, you have no say in any sympathy." Not that he wanted any in the first place.

"Doctor, as a mechanized system, I contain no ability to display any of this 'fellow feeling' humans are capable of."

The diagnostician groaned. He raised he voice, "You're a computer- of course you can't have any 'fellow feeling' because you aren't a 'fellow' in the first place!" At least, that's what he thought. He took the cigarette out of his mouth and continued complaining, "So you cannot realize how lenient I am being with you...any moment and I can give you a dent..." Any moment of every day, month, and year. Though there was a high chance of him getting repairing bills from Esha before the end of the month, so he should have said 'eventually I will.' "All you always do is nag about some thing I'm well aware of or never knew existed!" RONI used really long acronyms, there was no way he could understand.

"Doctor, please finish the diagnosis." The assistant reminded.

"Yeah, yeah, whatever..." Gabriel returned his cigarette to his mouth. "Just shut up and show me the idiot's symptoms and matches..." He remembered how hard the exams were- hopefully RONI was listening.

"Doctor, I still cannot comprehend on why you continue insisting in calling your patients 'idiots,' especially our current one."

Dr. Cunningham gave a long sigh and had his hand to his forehead. "What did I say about being quiet...?" He lowered his hand and sternly spoke to his computer. "This is the fourth time I had to explain it to you... there are five types of patients in the hospital. Immature kids, old dimwits, rush-hour businessmen, idiotic geeks, and a few but highly appreciated normal, sane people. Are you writing this down?"

"I am actually using the voice recorder. I will then store this information into my data after analysis."

"Good-" Whatever how RONI wanted to do it. "Now, RONI, I just happened to be assigned four of those five kinds of patients lately." And he was very grateful to Esha about that. "Go ahead and name some people." There was no flaw to his brilliant categorizing.

"Why not Assistant Secretary Jacob Tillman, Joshua Cunningham, Dr. Maria Torres, and Chief Esha Patel..?"

"Joshua's an immature kid..." Gabriel paused. "Wait." What was RONI trying to pull? "Why would I want to diagnose Esha- or any of these guys? RONI!" Tillman was a serious pain to work with, Joshua's exam was...complicated, and there was no possible way he would even accept those spiteful women as his patients- they wouldn't want him to be their doctor in the first place.

"I was ordered to list random names. And Dr. Cunningham, you did have Assistant Secretary Jacob Tillman and Joshua Cunningham as you patients before."

"Whatever- back to the diagnosis..." The diagnostician moaned as he leaned back on his chair.

"You have yet to classify Dr. Torres and Assistant Secretary Tillman."

"I can't classify Maria because I'm never gonna diagnose her! And Tillman's just some American-loving moron!" Gabriel went up to the computer's speakers to yell aloud.

"You have never mentioned the category of 'American-loving moron.'"

The diagnostician let out a long groan and shouted back, "He's an old buffoon with a large mouth! An annoying stubborn hag! A sob!" 'A disgrace to all mankind' was what Gabriel was about to say next, but he thought this was enough to shut up his computer.

Rapid Organization Networked Intelligence had nothing to say.

"What more do you want to hear?" Gabriel scoffed at the machine.

"Before the recording is turned off- would you like me to add 'American-loving moron/old buffoon with a large mouth/annoying stubborn hag/sob' to your list of categories?"

Gabriel's mouth dropped- causing his cigarette to fall out. He completely spaced out at hearing RONI saying those words. Sure he heard her say the famous algorithm many times before, but the new insults coming out of her speakers was just... extremely awkward. "Fine! Do what you want! Just show me the stuff already so I can finish this!" He picked up the cigarette and pointed it at the screen that still had the blue wallpaper.

"Dr. Cunningham, you now have six categories on types of patients, is this correct?"

"Should I add 'annoying computer' to the list?" Gabriel muttered to his talkative encyclopedia.

"Doctor, I have a self-diagnosis application; if there was ever a malfunction, it would automatically activate. There is no need-"

"You know, RONI-" Gabriel tossed his bent cigarette onto the low desk that was growing a pile of them. "I think you fit perfectly fine in that new category of 'loudmouth.'"

"Dr. Cunningham, that category was named 'American-loving moron/old buffoon with a large mouth/annoying stubborn hag/sob.'" The diagnostician went back on his office chair before RONI repeated the name. "I can assure you that I am a computer and cannot show emotions for a country and I am fully equipped with all the databases available- there is little possibility that I can be considered an 'idiot.' Since I am not human, I cannot have 'stubborn' nor 'annoying' traits- the words 'moron,' 'buffoon,' 'hag,' and 'sob' are based on human opinion. Also I must inform you that I do not have a human mouth, but speakers to communicate- and the current volume is at 5, the number of decibels are considered to the average human to be 'quiet.' So therefore-"

"Aargh-!" Gabriel got up and threw the computer to its side and wondered why did he hesitate earlier. He had enough of RONI's reasoning.

The computerized assistant's audio cord was taken off, so it could not vocalize any words.

The diagnostician opened his office door after getting a new cigarette. "I think I'm gonna do the paperwork manually." He's gonna tell the Chief of his idea to remove the computer as he did so- and maybe grab some aspirin on the way. When he stepped out into the hall, a familiar voice spoke.

"Dr. Cunningham, I am unable to fit in your category of-"

"What the-?" Gabriel jumped and yelled 'shut up' once more- he then added 'earplugs' to his shopping list.

"You have yet to finish-"

"JUST SHUT UP!" He stormed down the hall as fast as he could.

I'm gonna be completely random with the order of chapters...