Author's Note: I actually wrote the beginning of this over a year ago, probably March of last year, after I finished reading Eclipse. I'd completely forgotten about it until a few days ago when I found it again. This story is as if when Jacob kissed Bella in the woods-either before or during the battle, I can't remember- and she had decided to be with him, meaning there never was a Breaking Dawn. Enjoy :)
"In this moment, it felt as though we were the same person. His pain had always been and would always be my pain-now his joy was my joy. I felt joy, too, and yet his happiness was somehow also pain. Almost tangible- it burned against my skin like acid, a slow torture.
For one brief, never-ending second, an entirely different path expanded behind the lids of my tear-wet eyes. As if I were looking through the filter of Jacob's thoughts, I could see exactly what I was going to give up, exactly what this new self-knowledge would not save me from losing. I could see Charlie and Renee mixed into a strange collage with Billy and Sam and La Push. I could see years passing, and meaning something as they passed, changing me. I could see the enormous red-brown wolf that I loved, always standing as protector if I needed him. For the tiniest fragment of that second, I saw the bobbing heads of two small, black-haired children, running away from me in the familiar forest. When they disappeared," I realized that was what I really wanted. I didn't want to give up that, even for Edward whom I loved so much. I couldn't hurt Charlie and Renee like I knew I'd have to if I went with Edward. And even though I'd never thought much about being a mother, those two black-haired children were something Edward could never give me. And I began to want them more than I had ever thought possible.
And Jacob, how I could I leave my devoted friend, the one who'd spent all this time trying to make me realize that yes, I did love him, too? My heart was split in two, and even though I'd once thought I knew exactly what I wanted- a future as an immortal, forever with my Edward- I was confused now, unsure of what to do or who to turn to.
"Jacob," I whispered. He turned to look at me. "I can't leave you."
"I know," he smiled. "I know."
Disclaimer: The excerpt above is from Eclipse page 528-529 by Stephenie Meyer. She owns everything whilst I own only my ideas and theories.