(The camera zooms through a darkened, silent theater to magnify a heavy, dark red velvet curtain which slowly rises to reveal what appears to be a cozy study packed with mahogany bookcases, which are in turn packed with books, around the walls, centered around several equally opulent tables. Outside the obviously fake window fake snow that appears to resemble torn up pieces of tissue paper gently falls, and a shadowed figure sits, his back to you, in a comfortable plush armchair, before a flickering, anticlimactically electric fireplace. This is the AUTHOR, who somehow swivels in his armchair to face the silent, possibly nonexistent audience before speaking)

"Ahem. Greetings to anybody reading this work!. Before we start, I, the author, would like to make a few notes in the fashion of an extremely off topic introduction, rather like those sort of long, drawn-out introductory sequences you see on PBS documentaries that invariably end with somebody saying "… and viewers like you. Thank you." However, as my introductory notes aren't going to involve briefly thanking some sort of educational foundation, you might surmise that they are marginally important. Similarly, you could be wishing that I would just get on with it, skipping ahead to the actual storyline, having highly attractive fantasies about punching your monitor screen in, reaching through the Internet, and wringing my throat, or rapidly switching to another fanfiction. In the words of Igor from Dork Tower (excellent comic about gaming by John Kovalic), 'Well, looks like the last paying customers just fled. Again.'

"First, I would like to thank anybody who happens to read this travesty, especially to the end, as well as anybody who might have, curiously, looked at my highly obscure and incomplete Legend of Zelda work, Behind the Legend.

"Second, several of you may have noticed that I tend to write in a sort of theatrical format, meaning occasionally such tidbits as stage directions, character introductions, and side notes may appear in parentheses, such as (trips) or (this is LLOYD IRVING) or (how many of you have actually swung a cat in a bathroom?). Some notes will serve to indicate exactly what's being changed and why, and will be indicated in bold. I hope this does not inhibit your reading experience.

"Third, this fanfiction has been written as an alternative storyline to the Namco game Tales of Symphonia, due to the highly humorous, popularly debated, extremely numerous plotholes repeatedly noted throughout the storyline. For those of you who are tired of wondering why Mithos did not use a Life Bottle on Martel, why Kratos chose to run directly towards a Human Ranch when being pursued instead of, say, deep into the Triet Desert, how Noishe makes it to Dirk's House without walking through Iselia Forest, etc., this fiction may be of interest. Similarly, for those of you who are wondering how the storyline may have turned out if everything got a reality check, except twisted to that the storyline would still marginally happen (i.e. no Renegade appearing out of nowhere and killing Colette first thing), this may also be of interest.

"Fourth, I do not own Tales of Symphonia. I don't even own the computer I'm typing on. If anybody wishes to sue me, all I can offer them is (searches through pockets) three pens, a pencil, some chapstick, and a dented USB key filled with schoolwork.

"Fifth, the world I am operating on is highly different from Tales of Symphonia due to utilization of a completely different premise. If you will allow me to elucidate—"

(Interrupted unceremoniously by shouts of "get on with it" and thrown objects including but not limited to electronic pencil sharpeners, tax returns, granny smith apples, copies of Tales of the Tempest, and haggis, the AUTHOR pauses to shout "It'll all end in tears, I know it" and pelts off the stage, which is quickly shielded by the curtain for several moments before rising to reveal, strangely, an entirely different scene, across which the words "Thanks… to viewers like you. Thank you" flash before somehow changing to reveal the first scene in the play, entitled Tales of Symphonia: Finale. The AUTHOR returns hastily to shout "sorry for the long introduction" before fleeing once more)

Tales of Symphonia: Finale

A Theatrical Fanfiction written out in 3-D Bore-o-rama by Helvetius

(impressive music obviously stolen from a recent blockbuster movie plays)

Act 1: The Journey of Regeneration:

Scene 1: Prologue

(the scene appears completely black, but within moments, we can hear a person, maybe several persons breathing heavily, accompanied by echoing footsteps that ring distinctively off some kind of metal. A dull roar in the distance seems to be increasing in volume, and in response the person(s) in question raggedly attempt to pick up their breakneck pace. As the roar grows in volume, we hear harsh shouts accompanying it, finally culminating in a "Freeze, inferior being! You're surrounded!" A few more moments in the darkness pass; then, we hear a sudden, grotesque ripping sound, accompanied by a single shout of horror that sears through the theater)

???: "ANNA!"

(A few moments later, the scene fades in to reveal a long, circular tunnel that apparently leads off to some unknown distance, constructed entirely of a pitch black metal. Halfway up the rounded sides of the tunnel are two long catwalks, occasionally interspaced with ladders leading up or capillary tunnels running off to the sides, and below the catwalks flows water; from the entire setup it is clear that these are sewers. Along one such catwalk, a short but stout figure, wearing a hooded cloak, strides; unhooded, his face is grim and weathered, obscured by a thick brown beard. This is DIRK, a dwarf; he appears to be wearing heavy black boots, tough, durable trousers, greaves and shoulder plates, a collared work shirt under finely crafted chainmail under a dark surcoat, and gloves, while over his shoulder he lugs a sack filled with some unknown substance. Although he has a large hammer slung over his back, his right hand twitches more frequently to the stolen Desian handgun at his hip; on his head, he is wearing goggles with green tinted lenses. As he stalks along the catwalk, achieving a level of silence unusual for somebody wearing chainmail, he notices the water flowing along the sewer gain a pinkish, then reddish tint resembling blood)

DIRK: "!" (sharp intake of breath)

(he draws to the side, hiding in the shadows; his right hand slowly settles itself on the handgun and turns off the safety. A moment later, the remains of an obviously Desian soldier bob down the sewer, scorched horribly by fire. DIRK relaxes for a moment, although his hand remains on the gun, but stiffens when another body appears, this time a woman, bleeding profusely, sporting a strange bluish stone apparently embedded on her left hand. In her stiff arms, a human infant is clutched, apparently knocked out; nudging the body along the river as it limps, whimpering pathetically, is a large, green-white dog-like creature. This is NOISHE, who sports a long gash along his side, as if attacked by some giant monster. The woman is ANNA AURION, while the young infant is LLOYD AURION. DIRK vaults the side of the catwalk and lands in the river, stopping the body, as NOISHE stiffens and gives him a plaintive look. The woman's eyes flicker open)

DIRK: "Oy… oy, what happened, lass?!" (he takes one look at the wound and realizes she is not long for life)

ANNA: (coughs, miraculously still alive) "… attacked… Desians… my husband… (coughs again) …"

DIRK: "… I'm sorry…"

(the intense, desperate look in her eyes intensify as, apparently making some decision, she holds up the infant LLOYD with the last strength in her arms, indicating that DIRK should take him; he does so, watching as ANNA coughs again)

NOISHE: (whines)

ANNA: "Please… take him… raise… him well… (indicates the stone on her left hand) … he must wear this… my… (coughs) Exsphere… (takes a hold of his sleeve with an frighteningly strong grip)… don't let the Desians see it"

DIRK: (grimly) "I will. I swear it on my father's forge."

ANNA: (smiles weakly) "… before I die… I want to see his face again…"

DIRK: (holds out the infant LLOYD)

ANNA: (still smiling weakly) "… his name is… Lloyd… (to LLOYD) … you'll be like your father… someday…"

NOISHE: (whines again)

ANNA: "Noishe… (indicates the canine creatures) … he will go with you… please… be strong!"

(With that, ANNA'S head falls back with a splash, her smile frozen on her face. NOISHE abruptly stands up and nudges her, whimpering)

DIRK: "…! Lass…! (feels her pulse before covering his eyes with a weathered glove) … she's gone."

NOISHE: (howls tragically)

(DIRK stands, his face grim, and slings ANNA'S corpse over his shoulder, his sack forgotten on the catwalk. Securing LLOYD in the folds of his cloak, he turns and begins walking out of the sewers)

DIRK (to NOISHE): "C'mon."

NOISHE: (stops howling and begins limping after DIRK)

(Together, the ragged trio make their way out of the sewers and soon fade into the shadows. End SCENE 1)

Explanation of the Scene: Right now, a number of people reading this are probably wondering exactly what happened, why everything's gone weird, and how exactly best to kill the author of this work. This scene has been rewritten to reflect what really might have happened. First, you'll note that the Desian Human Ranches now seem to be gigantic metropolises, which I feel is correct due to their level of technological development (4,000 unhindered years of development), their population size (4,000 years of unhindered population growth), etc. As a result, the Desians take up far more room, building huge city-states rather like 01 (see The Matrix: Revolutions, despite the fact that it was a terrible movie), a huge, robotic city. I envisioned the Desian city as extremely rigid, constructed entirely out of black metal and tinted glass, highly robotic and technologically advanced, much bigger and more depressing, and very military. Logically, the Human Ranch would be located in the innermost part of the city, so Kratos, Anna, Noishe, and Lloyd would probably have fled via the sewers, as running through the streets or flying would be impractical; they were running in the direction of Iselia. As for the portrayal of Dirk, he is portrayed as a sort of rogue Dwarf who lives on his own and wants nothing more than to tinker with machines for the rest of his life, due to the fact that he was not involved with Cruxis. Thinking of a reason for him to enter the city covertly was difficult, but I guessed that he might want to do so to steal or at least spy on Desian technology; hence the reason why he was in the sewers, well armed. And from there, the storyline follows.

Scene 2: A Day in the Life of Lloyd

(the screen starts black)

DIRK: "Lloyd Irving, go to sleep!"

(we see a teenager, about 17 years old, sitting at a metal desk with a gas lamp hanging over it, poring over a large textbook while scribbling down something hastily on several sheets of paper. This is LLOYD AURION, now IRVING: dressed in what appears to be everyday work clothes consisting of trousers, suspenders, a collared work shirt with the sleeves rolled up, and gloves, he runs his hands through his distinctive spiky brown haircut, his brown eyes glaring at the book in front of him as if daring it to make a move. The camera zooms out enough to see a glimpse of his room, consisting of a narrow metal cot attached to the wall, several rolling metal tables, several bookcases, piles of paper, pieces of machinery and tools strewn about, hunks of stone and metal, three doors, and a blackboard with chalk, before an eraser comes flying from offstage and strikes him squarely in the face, sending a cloud of chalk dust all over his hair and visage)

LLOYD: "Hey!"

DIRK (offstage): "You have school tomorrow, so get to bed!"

LLOYD: "Yeah, but…"

DIRK (offstage): "What?"

LLOYD: "… I haven't finished my Sylverantese homework…"

(there is silence for a brief second before another eraser comes flying from offstage, accompanied by a shout from DIRK)

DIRK: "WHAT THE NILFHEIM HAVE I TOLD YOU ABOUT PROCRASTINATING?! FINISH THAT HOMEWORK NOW AND GO TO BED, OR I'LL BE LOADING MORE AMMO INTO THE ERASER CANNON!"

(we zoom out to see DIRK, dressed similarly in work clothes, sitting in a separate room even, if possible, more cluttered with machinery and diagrams than LLOYD'S, behind a piece of apparatus with a long nozzle aimed at LLOYD'S door, next to which sits a pile of discarded blackboard erasers)

LLOYD: (grumbling) "Fine, fine…" (scribbles down several more words in silence before finally slamming the textbook shut and cramming into a bag at his feet, out of which the hilts of two swords stick)

(gradual fade out to black, followed by a fade in to Lloyd's room. The camera pans past one of the bookcases, which seems to be completely filled with books about swords and legendary heroes, particularly Mithos, mechanics, and robots, several of the metal tables, occupied by piles of paper, books, tools, diagrams, writing utensils, etc., and through a door, through which we can hear LLOYD shouting and the dull thud of wood against padding. A small, circular metal clock on the wall, which contains a number of strange, porthole like openings that on closer examination appear to be cabinets and picture frames, shows that it is now the morning. The camera zooms in through one of the stone doorways to another, small circular room, where we see LLOYD attacking a padded dummy with two wooden swords)

LLOYD: "Hiyah! Ha! Hah!" (striking the target repeatedly) "You Desians won't get away with anything!" (obviously fantasizing battling with Desians and unrealistically defeating them) "And now for the finishing blow! DEMON FANG!" (swings his sword)

(a streak of bluish, blade thin light neatly slices the padding in half and scorches another deep cut on the opposing wall. LLOYD is seen panting heavily for a moment before he wipes his forehead with a handkerchief and heads back to his own room, where he nimbly makes his way past the clutter, grabs his bag, a weathered, brown satchel sort of affair, and heads out the door. The scene pans to himself, DIRK, and NOISHE sitting in an equally cluttered kitchen, tucking in to a huge Dwarven style breakfast, which translates to… bacon, eggs, pancakes, etc. A typically British breakfast, only multiplied by a factor of 50)

DIRK: "Nothing like Dwarven-style cooking, eh, Lloyd? (occupied with food)"

LLOYD: (eating, but not as quickly as DIRK, who has a stack of cleaned plates next to him; finishing, he puts down his fork) "(half bantering tone) Yeah, especially when I'm the one who cooked today (DIRK grimaces faintly; his eyes travel to a faint scorch mark on the ceiling)… anyway! I'm off!"

(LLOYD feeds NOISHE another piece of bacon and scratches him in between the ears before slinging his bag, a sort of satchel affair, over his shoulder, grabbing a metal lunchbox, and giving a brief wave before walking out of the room. We now zoom out and finally see what DIRK'S actual and highly unusual house looks like; it appears to be a large cave, completely underground, with a large pool or spring in the center through which an underground river flows. The cave, painstakingly carved to be roughly circular, has two floors suspended above the pool by large chains, both made out of metal and cluttered with DIRK'S machinery and equipment. They are connected to two sets of circular catwalks corresponding to each level by bridges, and connected to each other by ladders. Lining the catwalks are stone doors which obviously lead to other rooms. LLOYD picks his way down a ladder to a stone pathway and begins to make his way up the underground river, jumping from dark stone to dark stone until he reaches a waterfall leading up to a narrow point of light several meters above him. He makes his way expertly up a series of narrow stone outcroppings and finally emerges in a sun-drenched forest, known to many as Iselia Forest and to others as the no-man's-land between the Free Territory of Iselia and Desian Iselia. LLOYD begins walking through the idyllic forest, full of thick trees and occasionally vicious animal life, curiously giving no sign that it is a war zone between two constantly feuding forces. The scene fades out to black, but we hear several sound effects)

LLOYD (thinking): "What the—a giant laser shooting mushroom, a wolf, and an eagle just randomly attacked me at the same time! What are the chances of that?!"

WOLF: (howls)

FX: (sword being drawn) (sound of a wolf leaping through the air, followed by the sound of a sword slash)

LLOYD: "!"

FX: (clang of sword against beak as the eagle dive bombs LLOYD) (sound of a sword slash and a body falling to the ground)

LLOYD: "Not even close!"

FX: (sound of a laser burst striking somebody)

LLOYD: "Gah!" (thinking) "Watch it!"

FX: (another laser burst, followed the slash of a sword and the sound of a laser bouncing off a sword)

LLOYD: "DEMON FANG!"

FX: (sound of a slash, followed by a small explosion as the Demon Fang apparently hits a tree)

(the scene clears to show LLOYD on one knee in a forest clearing, two swords out, his bag on the ground a few feet behind him, a small scorch mark on his arm, surrounded by the corpse of a wolf and a hawk, and, curiously, the two severed halves of a giant laser shooting mushroom. A nearby tree sports a deep, smoking cut. He glances at the injury)

LLOYD (thinking): "That was close… if I hadn't had my mother's Exsphere, I would've been seriously injured…"

(zoom in on LLOYD's gloved left hand, under which a faint blue glow can be seen emanating, followed by LLOYD wiping his swords with a rag, dispensing of the dead bodies, packing up, and moving on. The scene skips to LLOYD walking through the forest, which is now more and more being replaced with what look to be ancient stone ruins, mingled with ancient, dysfunctional magitechnology from a bygone age, overgrown with plant life. Soon, a tall, similarly built wall looms up from the distance, marred by a series of huge cracks along it. The busy murmur of construction workers, the clang of hammers, the whoosh of steam engines begins to be audible. As LLOYD approaches the broken Great Iselian Wall, plumes of steam rise into the sky, and complex scaffolding and machinery loom into view, with workmen swarming about, shouting, tools in hand. Aside from workmen, what looks to be a small sort of military outpost has been set up, with a number of Iselian Knights surrounding the vicinity, well equipped and armored in surcoats, bizarre combinations of plate and mail, helmets, greaves, and cloaks, all embellished with religious symbols from the Church of Martel. In gauntleted hands they grasp lances, swords, shields, and bows; each at least carries two weapons, as if being better armed will protect them from the Desian threat. As LLOYD approaches, one of the guards spots him and gestures him over. Curiously, the two guards at the gate/gaping crack in the ancient wall seem to be carrying sharpened… rakes)

RAKE SOLDIER 1 (shouting): "Hey, Dwarf Boy! Over here!"

RAKE SOLDIER 2: "Lloyd, meet anything in the forest as you came here?"

LLOYD: "Ever fight a laser shooting mushroom?"

RAKE SOLDIERS 1 AND 2: "…"

RAKE SOLDIER 1: "Can't say I ever have…"

RAKE SOLDIER 2: "But no Desians, right?"

LLOYD: "No, the coast was clear."

RAKE SOLDIER 2: "Right, move along then…"

LLOYD: "Wait… my dad finished those swords you ordered…" (rummages around in his satchel, which is curiously enchanted to reduce the weight and size of objects placed inside, thus explaining how LLOYD's party can carry around dozens of weapons, sets of armor, etc. in the game) "… here!"

(RAKE SOLDIERS 1 AND 2 watch, completely perplexed, as LLOYD pulls sword after sword out of his satchel, until a pile of about 2 dozen swords is neatly stacked on the ground. Barely stopping to contemplate how so many swords fit in such a satchel, RAKE SOLDIER 1 picks up the swords while RAKE SOLDIER 2 waves LLOYD past the gate, handing him a sort of ticket or voucher as he passes. LLOYD gives a jaunty wave and vanishes past the gate. A few of the workmen and soldiers wave back; apparently LLOYD is a well known occurrence around the gate. Scene fades out to be replaced with LLOYD entering a medium sized classroom and setting his bag down next to a long desk designed to seat multiple people, pulling out several books and notebooks, and setting them down on the desk before sitting on the bench. The classroom walls are bare, except at the front of the classroom, dominated by a blackboard, a few small bookcases, and a lectern. A number of other students, ranging from farmers to ordinary children, as evidenced by their clothes, chatter around the room, while LLOYD glances out of the second story window he sits next to. The wall is visible in the distance, and further is the blackened territory of the Desian Human Ranch. For a moment LLOYD seems distracted, but is brought back to attention by a sharp rapping on the lectern. He glances forward; the teacher, an ordinary human, is calling for attention. Heaving a sigh, he turns forward as time passes by in a blur. We hear brief fragments of each class pass by)

TEACHER: "Is this really Sylvarantese, or some foreign language?"

LLOYD (thinking): "Oh, no! I accidentally did my Sylvarantese homework in Dwarf Runes!"

(blur)

TEACHER: "Mr. Irving, while the 10 foot tall sculpture of myself you made certainly exceeds expectations for art class, your history class marks leave much to be desired… for example, while you were unable to tell me such basics as when the Temple of Martel was built, you did happen to somehow know the name of the third son of the tenth king of the fourth Dwarven Dynasty… for whatever reason…"

(blur)

TEACHER: "Hm… being the adopted son of a dwarf must explain why you aced the last 5 science tests… except for the terms…"

LLOYD: "Eh, it's too much bother to memorize them when I know what they do."

TEACHER: "Yes, but referring to a hammer as 'that tool thingy' and steam power as 'that cloud thingy' and Martel as 'that goddess thingy—'"

LLOYD: "OK, OK, I get the point…"

(blur)

TEACHER: "Mr. Irving, identify the cause of death of the Fourth Chosen of Sylvarant."

LLOYD: (clearly not paying attention) "… and three marmots!"

CLASS: (laughter)

(blur, interrupted by the sudden ring of a bell; we see LLOYD, tiredly packing up. The bright light of day filters in through the window, indicating that the time is roughly 2:00 in the afternoon. The classroom is already empty, even devoid of the teacher, and a few discarded papers litter the floor. LLOYD heaves a sigh, crams the last of his books inside his surprisingly spacious satchel, and leaves the room, entering a dusty hallway and walking down a flight of stairs, all of which exude the sort of austerity and architectural style of an august educational institution, museum, or well established funeral home. The scene cuts to LLOYD walking through an empty courtyard/garden before exiting through a tall, arched gate with cast iron doors and walking down the road. The wind blows a few dry leaves from the trees in the courtyard, indicating the season is around fall, and the scene soon cuts to a busy factory, where we see LLOYD, now wearing a belt equipped with an assortment of tools, runs about with a number of other men, similarly attired, along narrow paths between large steam engines, through clouds of steam)

WORKMAN: "Pressure leak on Engine 3!"
FOREMAN: "Dawes, Irving, hop to it!"

DAWES (a minor OC who will never appear again): "Yessir!"

LLOYD: "Coming!"

WORKMAN: "Engine 4 checking in, sir!"

WORKMAN: "Engine 5 is running fine!"

LLOYD: "Engine 3 locked down, sir!"

FOREMAN: "Good job, Irving, Dawes—wait—"

WORKMAN: "Pressure leak on Engine 7!"

DAWES: "Again?"

LLOYD: (sighs and pelts off)

WORKMAN: "Hurry up!"

(Scene abruptly switches to the outside of the large building where LLOYD evidently works, a sort of large, factory affair built out of brick in a typically Victorian style. The sky is rapidly darkening, and we see LLOYD at the end of a long line of workmen wearily making their way out of the gates, pausing to receive some sort of punch on a card. Next to them, another line of men are punching in, likely part of some other shift. LLOYD pauses to say goodbye to some other workers who he evidently knows well before shifting his bag on his shoulder and proceeding down the wall. Even as the sun sets the city still buzzes with life, although the temperature is rapidly dropping. LLOYD pauses to buy a newspaper from a nearby newspaper stand and sits on a bench, reading the paper. As the sun sets, a tall, gaunt man in sooty work clothes comes along to light a nearby street lamp with a long pole. Meanwhile people continue to walk around the city; the night life of Iselia is just beginning)

LLOYD: "Hmmm…"

(Camera zooms out to see the front headline of the newspaper. Splashed in large letters across the front page are the words "DAY OF THE ORACLE TOMORROW," under which a smaller headline says "MATRIARCH SAYS CHOSEN'S ENTOURAGE HAS GREAT CHANCE OF SAVING SYLVARANT." LLOYD appears to be reading an article on the potential military campaign against the Desians)

LLOYD: "An exclusive interview with Kratos Aurion, the Chosen's personal weaponsmaster…"

(idly turns the page before looking at a circular watch strapped to his belt, folding the newspaper, and standing up. A steam powered, curiously built train that resembles a series of rolling marbles with the actual train cars suspended in the middle turns the bend and rushes into sight before screeching to a stop; LLOYD is evidently in a train station. He joins the throng of people rushing onto the train and sits down on a side seat. Behind him, the now dark Iselia rushes past as the train abruptly jolts to a tilt and begins going down an incline. Around him, people chatter about the Day of the Oracle. LLOYD stifles a brief yawn and the scene cuts to the circular train pulling into another train station. We can now see an overhead shot of Iselia; the small city seems to consist of several regions, the first a strange combination of brick and stone Victorian style buildings interspersed with ancient stone ruins cordoned off from the rest of the city. Actual stone ruins that still exist now appear to be tourist sites, monuments, or artistically isolated in parks and museums. This is the governmental sector and contains a number of municipal and governmental buildings, including the factory where LLOYD worked. Several parts of this region appear to actually be floating in the air, suspended by powerful steam engines. Another region seems to consist of a number of cottages and is clearly a residential district; located out past the boundary of whatever ancient city clearly used to be here, no ruins can be seen. The residential district is far more pastoral and rural the further east we look, where farms and the wilderness are located. To the Northwest, a series of mountains loom in the darkness, and a huge expanse of ruins extend from the boundary of the current Iselia to a tall building in the distance, located on top of a mountain, that everybody can recognize as the Temple of Martel. Aside from this, the entire city seems to be filled with construction workers improving on the ruins. The night is growing chilly and fog is already obscuring part of the city)

FX: (steam whooshing, the screech of brakes)

(scene cuts to LLOYD getting off the train, having now donned a long coat and a scarf for the cold night, and mingling with the crowd as he heads to the wall looming in the distance. Leaving, he finds himself in a small business district, including already busy restaurants and some stores closing down for the night. The business district, as well as the rest of Iselia, is clearly ecstatic about the Day of the Oracle, as a lot of stores seem to have taken the excuse to have sales, and enthusiastic people are thronging the streets, popping bottles of champagne, and in general being highly anticipatory. A lot of services seem to have abruptly been made free, such as horse carriages cantering along the cobbled roads. As LLOYD walks, the happiness becomes evident: he sees rugged workmen warming themselves near heaters, one playing a guitar and singing a sort of ballad about world regeneration; he sees a few wealthy people sitting in a busy restaurant terrace proclaiming a toast to the Chosen; he sees somebody ask somebody else to marry them, to which they receive an enthusiastic acceptation. Smiling slightly, as the euphoria has even gotten to him, he adjusts his scarf and walks off, the scene fading before cutting to LLOYD, now back home, sitting in the kitchen, as he, NOISHE, and DIRK tuck into dinner)

LLOYD: "So, the day's finally come."

DIRK (through a mouthful of food): "Eh, is that so?"

LLOYD: "Yeah. People were celebrating in the streets. It kind of surprises me… I heard the last 6 Chosens failed."

DIRK: "Indeed they did. Nobody ever heard from them again."

LLOYD: "But…" (perusing the newspaper) "It says here that this Chosen has a good chance of making it."

NOISHE: (whines)

LLOYD: (feeds NOISHE something off the table) "I mean, the Matriarch's own grandchild… plus he's going to have the Iselian Knights with him, as well as his personal weaponsmaster, Kratos Aurion."

DIRK: "Aye, I've heard that one is a fearsome fellow, a master of the blade and magic."

LLOYD: "Yeah. And those two elves will be going with him as well."

DIRK: "It's unusual to hear of two of the Elder Folk out here."
LLOYD: "Really? Well, they're both masters of magic, the Sages. I think there's a really good chance that this Chosen will succeed."

DIRK: "Mm. Dwarven Vow number 7, yes?"

LLOYD: "Hehe."

(the two eat in silence for a moment)

LLOYD: "What do you think we're going to do if… when the world gets regenerated?"

DIRK (grins wolfishly through his beard): "Well, I'm going to go and ransack the Desian ranches first thing! I've always wondered how they power everything, you know?"

LLOYD: "I think I might take off to travel the world. Maybe I'll join some humanitarian effort or something."

DIRK: "Well, at least your dream is less selfish than mine, heh. There will probably be a lot of rebuilding to do, what with the Desians and their reign of terror and all. And the rebuilding will be more than just buildings and the lot; the Chosen's journey is about more than war."

LLOYD: "… Yeah…"

NOISHE: (whines)

DIRK: (feeds NOISHE something) "In a way, I guess it's about regenerating not just Sylvarant, but the people of Sylvarant. So if you do go… I'll appreciate seeing you back here some time, you hear? Don't forget your roots. Besides, you're the best apprentice I've ever had, and every self respecting Dwarf craftsman has got to pass on his skills to somebody."

LLOYD: "Well, I'm the only apprentice you've ever had, but, eh, I promise I'll return. After all, this is the only home I have ever known."

DIRK: "Well, let's not get ahead of ourselves. You'd better finish your homework, lad."
LLOYD: "We're going to the parade tomorrow, right?"

DIRK (distracted): "Parade?"

LLOYD: "You know, the one to see the Chosen and her companions off? It's rumored that it will be the first time the Chosen will ever appear in public."

DIRK: "Eh, why not. If we're going to do that, I guess I better turn in early as well."

NOISHE: (barks as LLOYD and DIRK clear off the table, dump the dishes into the sink, and head off to their respective rooms)

(scene fades out and is abruptly replaced with a dark figure standing on the rooftop of the Iselian main government palace/offices, where it has just begun to start snowing. The dark figure pulls out a golden locket and opens it, looking at something inside that we can't see. From what we can see of the figure, it appears to be a built man wearing dark purple clothes and light silver armor with long, shaggy auburn hair shadowing his eyes)

???: "The time approaches. Anna… I'm sorry."

(the man looks into the dark distance and draws his sword, holding it hilt down in front of him. A sudden, white light flares out beneath him as luminous feathers rise into the air and vanish, and, abruptly, bluish, angelic wings made of light appear on his back. The man begins to float in the air while chanting something under his breath, presumably a spell. Suddenly, he opens his eyes, which are a shocking, deep red, and shouts the last words of the incantation)

???: "Sacred powers, cast your purifying light upon these corrupt souls. Rest in peace, sinners! JUDGMENT!"

(pillars of white hot light blast down in the distant forest, creating an explosion. However, the camera is too far away to determine what has happened or why this figure would cast such a spell, and soon the figure, staring intently in the distance, sheathes his sword, apparently satisfied, and turns his back. The blue wings vanish from sight, and he vanishes from sight. The camera abruptly cuts to a cluttered but spacious and luxurious room where every available surface seems to have been claimed by books. A fire flickers in a fireplace to one side of the room, which appears to be a sort of living room. The walls of the room are occupied by bookcases, a few doors, and a few paintings, and the room itself contains some comfortable furniture. A small boy, apparently no older than 12 years old, looks up from the armchair on which he is lounging, reading a thick book. Dressed casually in nightclothes, as he seems to have been about to go to bed, his most striking features are his brilliant blue eyes and his long silver hair. As he looks up, a surprised expression on his face, a young woman in her early twenties opens one of the doors, dressed in a modest nightgown and carrying a tray with two steaming mugs on it. She hands one mug to the boy, who sips contemplatively from it)

BOY: "Did you feel that, Raine?"

RAINE: "… Yes. That incredible backlash of mana… and what's strange is how it feels."

BOY: "Yeah… different somehow. What do you think it was? Elves… or maybe…"

RAINE: "… No. It doesn't feel the same. I'll go and investigate it."

BOY: "I'll come with you—"

RAINE: "No, Genis, it's getting late. You should be going to bed. You've got a big day ahead of you."

GENIS (pouts): "… Fine." (closes his book, which appears to be entitled The Art of the Magi, Vol. XXI and heads through one of the doors after putting his mug on the tray. A moment later, we hear a shout from apparently an upstairs room) "Good night!"

RAINE: "Good night, Genis."

(scene fades out, then cuts back to RAINE, now dressed in white, liturgical robes and some light armor, as well as a cloak and a scarf, carrying an ornate staff. With her are a number of Iselian knights carrying torches; the entire procession is in the process of walking through the forest towards the plume of smoke rising in the snowy night. The group abruptly comes out in a forest clearing to find a number of shattered trees, smoking craters, and the twisted, blackened remains of some sort of army, with mechanical vehicles and bodies lying everywhere. The knights shift restlessly, obviously shaken, and the ones who haven't already drawn their weapons do so, spreading into the clearing. A few minutes later, one of them returns to the Iselian commander and RAINE, throwing down a dented, blackened helmet at his feet. The commander's eyes narrow)

COMMANDER: "Desians."

KNIGHT 1: "Awaiting orders, sir."

COMMANDER: "Search the area for any survivors and capture them. If they try to escape, kill the scum. Move in groups and keep in touch. Milady, if you will?"

RAINE: (nods, internally shaken)

KNIGHT 2: "Let's move out!"

KNIGHT 1: "Yessir!"

KNIGHT 2: "Wait…"

COMMANDER: "What, soldier?"

KNIGHT 1: "Feathers… sir, there are feathers buried in the snow."

KNIGHT 2: (sifts around in the snow and pulls one up) "And they're… shining."

COMMANDER: "!"

RAINE: "Let me see that!" (snatches the feather from the soldier's gauntleted fist) "… This… the mana signature is the same. The structure, form, and physical properties of this feather are unlike any existing bird I'm familiar with. I can only attribute such a feather to two possible sources: a Summon Spirit… or…"

COMMANDER: "… or?"

RAINE: "Angels… It is possible there is a third, unknown source of these feathers, but that's likely meaningless conjecture. I'll need to study this situation more, Commander."

COMMANDER: "As you wish, milady."

RAINE: "How mysterious… is the work of the Goddess? Or is it perhaps some other outside force…"

(Scene fades out to an opulent office, where we hear two voices speaking; two men, one with a shock of smooth blue hair over one eye and a ponytail and another with craggy features and jagged black hair, stand discussing something with fervor. The figure with blue hair paces continuously, while the other is gesturing frantically)

??? (the one with black hair): "Lord Yuan, the army hasn't reported back."

YUAN: "… I see. Kratos must have found them. Botta!"

BOTTA: "Yes, milord?"

YUAN: "I'm sending you personally this time. Kill the Chosen at all costs unless impossible."

BOTTA: "It will be done, milord." (bows and backs out of the room)

YUAN (turns and pulls out a picture frame from his desk drawer): "The great powers are gathered, it seems. The game is afoot… for you, Martel, I have to do this. Soon… everything will be back to the way it should be. Forgive me."

(Scene fades out to reveal a cloaked figure walking into a dusty, beaten desert town filled with abject poverty and squalor. Beggars huddle in miserable masses in the dirt roads next to adobe houses and rickety wooden structures, on the whole resembling a bizarre mixture of a typical American cowboy ghost town and an American Indian adobe structure city. Desians seem to be wandering the streets treating the tortured citizens how they will. The cloaked figure is seen speaking to a beggar, who points in a certain direction; the figure gives the beggar some coins before turning. The wind shifts and blows off the figure's hood, revealing a young woman with deep red eyes and black hair, tied back. She pulls the hood back up and walks off into the desert)

???: "For the sake of the world… the Chosen of Sylvarant must die."

(Scene fades out. End SCENE 2)

Explanation of the Scene: As you may have noticed… things have really, really changed. I suppose I shall start at the beginning by the considering the character we all know and love as Lloyd Irving, kind of dumb but unerringly idealistic hero of the Two Worlds. As you may have noticed, Lloyd has become apparently smarter; in fact, the first part of the scene even makes Lloyd seem like a nerdy student studying late into the night. I argue that the reason why Lloyd is dumb in Tales of Symphonia is because school was not interesting to him; hence, when he finds subjects he enjoys, he excels at them. Hence I decided to portray Lloyd as a handy mechanic with interest in math and science (but accordingly, not English, History, or Religion), playing off his supposed training in the Dwarven arts in the original game. I also argue that Lloyd operates off of pure logic, an actually highly intelligent ability that Lloyd will continue to exhibit. Similarly, I have also retained Lloyd's interest in swords, heroes, and fighting, although not being able to trust a 17 year old with swords seems ludicrous to me. Hence Lloyd has real swords. I have also given Lloyd a magic satchel in order to explain away the fundamental problem with carrying around possibly hundreds of pounds of equipment by the end of the game. I have also powered up Lloyd's techniques, including Demon Fang, which strikes me as an actually highly powerful technique. Thinking about it, a Demon Fang is essentially a burst of white hot electromagnetic radiation that should travel at the speed of light and cut through offending objects like a lightsaber. That's pretty powerful. Otherwise, Lloyd is essentially the same dense but kind person we all know.

Next, Dirk's home has become a Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles-esque underground hideout for two reasons. First, because Dwarves live underground, and I see no reason why Dirk would complain about losing his skills by living on the surface when he just dig himself an underground hideout (or, perhaps, blow himself one with dynamite). He's a dwarf. He can do it. Second, because Dirk needs a reason for existing and I gave him one; to tinker with technology. Hence he needs a place to tinker with technology. Third, Dirk lives in an isolated location with its own water supply close to enemy territory for the sake of convenience. If he lived in Iselia, his trade would become extremely suspicious; sneaking into Desian territory every night?

Of course, I always thought it funny that Iselia Forest happens to be inhabited by laser shooting giant mushrooms. In my mind those enemies are almost as funny as the evil, red eyed rabbits, or the incorporeal ghosts throwing corporeal hammers.

Anyway, I have also made Iselia much more technologically developed and military, as well as changed its entire culture. First, I find it ridiculous that the Chosen, savior of the world, lives in a rural village guarded by a temperamental half elf and two middle aged men with rakes. In fact, throughout the entire journey, people don't seem to be that worked up about the Journey of Regeneration at all. When Lloyd's group arrives in towns, people are like "Meh, it's the Chosen" or "Omigosh, you're the Chosen's group?! The fact that you're wearing pure white robes and the Cruxis Crystal don't tip me off at all!" Hence I've made Iselia one of the few free territories in Sylvarant (only exists, of course, because Mithos lets it) with a huge army that is slanted to set off with Colette. This army is well trained, numerous, and well equipped, because saving the world is serious business and everybody wants to help. You'd think that people would be more willing to do something upon which the future of their world hinges, but no. I've also made Sylvarant steampunk and Victorian because steampunk is generally associated with Victorian culture and because I feel Sylvarant should have developed further in the course of multiple generations of Chosen (think. If each one sets out at roughly 16 years old, like Colette, and Colette is the seventh Chosen, then Sylvarant has been declining for over a hundred years. A lot can happen, as evidenced by, say, the Industrial Revolutions, in 100 years. Plus that's not to say that the technology from previous declining periods hasn't remained. Hence Iselia is a fantastically steampunk world.

You may be wondering why nobody has got a gun. The reason why is because guns would ruin everything, so I've decided that guns still exist. They're just miserably inaccurate and only in the preliminary stages of development (blunderbuss, anybody?). I've also taken the liberty of giving Iselia a fantasy steampunk feel: hence the floating segments of the city, weirdly shaped steam trains, etc. At the same time, there are ordinary Victorian conventions: ordinary clothes, telegraphs, newspapers, lamplighters, etc. It's a curious amalgam of past, present, and future.

Now, I've also taken the liberty of completely redesigning several characters, so I'll start with the character that seems to be popular (for some reason), Kratos Aurion, the mysterious, emo mercenary from outer space! Kratos is described herein as the Chosen's personal weaponsmaster because I needed to fit him into the story and having him leap out from behind a bush and say "Hi, I'm a Mercenary who just happened to be in the area up here by this temple behind a bush despite the fact that there's only one way to get here and now I'm going to save all your sorry butts" is highly implausible to me. Hence Kratos has taken the logical and smart step of infiltrating Iselia years beforehand and becoming a trusted member of the Chosen's entourage. Plus somebody needs to teach Colette how to fight.

Second, the fact that Genis and Raine are (half) elves who can cast magic, the most powerful, kick butt force on the planet should be important. Nobody in Iselia seems to give a pair of fetid dingo's kidneys that these two hold immense potential as protectors of the Chosen because they seem to be the only good people who can cast magic from Iselia to Asgard. Plus it's stated that Genis and Raine basically popped out of the Otherworldly Gate next to Iselia as freshly abandoned children with no place to go, so that, plus their usefulness, would certainly get them into the Chosen's household. The role that I'm having both play is different. Raine is the Chosen's personal healer and teacher, while Genis is being trained as the Chosen's personal mage (i.e. person little kid who blows up things for the Chosen). Both have lived a relatively comfortable life since they arrived at Iselia, being really important people (hence Raine's title of "milady"), and their personalities are mostly the same, except that Genis is now more confident (it is stated in the game that Lloyd, who seemingly possessed qualities he did not have but wanted, such as courage and strength, made Genis feel inferior). The fact that Genis and Raine are not important in Iselia at all in the game is astounding and thus remedied.

Third, Colette and her family; you'd think that the Chosen would be really, really important. But no. In the game, Colette, savior of the planet, rejuvenator of people's souls, hope of mankind, is a clumsy girl who lives in rural village guarded by two idiots with rakes right next to a dangerous Desian Ranch who's educated in a one-room schoolhouse at apparently the same level as (one on end) a child prodigy and (on the other end) 8 years olds who they intend to send out into the dangerous world where you meet bloodthirsty monsters every 5 minutes without formal weapon training and protected by a group of old men with funny hats. STUPIDEST PREMISE EVER. I've rewritten Colette to be trained to become the Chosen since birth. Hence she has interacted with few humans ever (hence Lloyd's uninformed belief that Colette is a boy and the fact that the Chosen coming out into the public is a big deal) and spends all her time in preparation for saving the world: training with weapons, learning about religion, etc. To that end Colette is a clearly lonely girl; however, you can't suppress her intrinsic personality, so she will still be optimistic, cheerful, self-sacrificing, apologetic, and clumsy. Plus, she's immensely important and thus basically lives in a palace where she receives personal training every day. Similarly, Phaidra has been written to become the city's Matriarch (leader), while Frank is, uh… some important religious figure guy. One of the major differences, though, is that Colette really has no friends.

Other characters who appeared in this scene, namely Yuan, Botta, and Sheena, will be explained later. One thing that will be explained is why Kratos blew up the Renegade (yes, they were Renegades, but the Iselian Knights don't know that, do they?) army. Yuan's goal, to kill the Chosen, is best accomplished with an army. To Yuan, the death of the Chosen is necessary to save both worlds, and that is extremely important. The fact that he sent Botta, Vidarr, and two ordinary Renegades to do this is, in my mind, a major oversight on his part. He would logically have sent an entire bleeding army to drive around the Iselian peninsula and ambush the Chosen at the Temple of Martel, killing her and thus (in his mind) saving the world. However, Kratos has been informed by Mithos that the Renegade army is coming because Mithos sees all; thus Kratos blows up the offending army with a massive Judgment spell (by the way, I forgot the incantation), allowing Mithos' plan to continue.

The reason why Triet is such a dump will be explained later. If anybody else has questions, I will answer them.

(curtain closes, then opens again to reveal the unfortunate AUTHOR, now sporting a broken arm)

"Thanks to everybody for reading this far, although I'd appreciate it if you didn't break my arm… in any case, reviews are appreciated, flames are accepted, and I will be accepting questions. However, I should probably note a few themes that I will probably be employing throughout the entire fiction, as well as a quick note.

"First, the storyline will remain marginally the same. Even if it seems like I'm on the verge of completely obliterating the storyline, don't worry; I will twist events to make sure that, in the end, the crucial events still happen. For example, even if Colette seems on the verge of getting assassinated by Botta, something will happen: Lloyd will pop out of nowhere and whack him over the head with a dinner plate, Mithos will come down personally to kill Botta, Kratos will Stone Blast his face, etc.

"Second, there will be pairings in this fiction. However, like the game, they won't be emphasized like they are in the OVA (where Lloyd x Colette is blatantly, blatantly obvious), which, by the way, isn't bad. Here's where I scare off some of my very few readers by listing which pairings I support: the canon ones. Yes, that's right. That means I support Lloyd x Colette, Zelos x Sheena (by the way, recently made blatantly, blatantly canon), Regal x Alicia, Yuan x Martel, Kratos x Anna, etc. I actually would like to see Genis x Presea, which Namco has subtly, subtly hinted, but since I don't have anything concrete, I just stick with Genis' one sided crush for now. Here's hoping for some of that in Tales of Symphonia: Dawn of the New World!

"Third, if you read this fiction, if you make comments that make it clear that you don't understand the nature of really idiotically convoluted concepts like Cruxis Crystals and whatnot, I may or may not ignore you. If it's convenient, I'll give a concise explanation. A misconception I often see is "Lloyd should be an angel and have angelic powers!" That's incorrect.

"Fourth, I'll be running a poll amongst reviewers (if I get any, heh) to change my writing style. In other words, if enough people decided that they dislike this sort of theatrical mode of writing, then I'll gladly switch to the traditional third person format. If you have an opinion on this, please mention it politely. Meaning comments of "Your writing sux! You suck!" will be ignored. Blatantly.

"Anyway, enjoy the rest of your time on this site. I'd like to part with two messages:

"WHAT IS UP WITH LLOYD IN TALES OF SYMPHONIA: DAWN OF THE NEW WORLD?! WHAT IS HE THINKING?! WHY DID HE DO IT?! DID HE EVEN DO IT?! Yes, my brain is breaking too. If you hate Lloyd and can't wait to kill him, well, I guess you're entitled to your opinion. In my opinion, Lloyd is a good character.

"Next, why are there no Tales of Symphonia characters (the only Tales that could really have been plausible) in Super Smash Bros. Brawl?! I was really coming out for Lloyd (who, despite what all you naysayers say, was the only one who really had a chance of making it). Ah well."

(fade out)