(Disclaimer: I did not write nor do I own any part of The Vampire Diaries books or TV show. I wish, but no. All subsequent text is my own unless otherwise stated.)

PROLOGUE

Dear Rick,

When Stefan told me to help Elena I knew right then I could never release her from the sire bond.

Okay, well maybe not never never. After almost 150 years, I've learned that never can be a super long time. Also, never say never. You'd be surprised at all the things you end up doing you didn't think you ever would...Like this sire bond, for example. I didn't mean for it to happen (I swear) but it did. No one was more surprised than me. I mean, come on, the girl I'd fallen in love with- the kindest, most genuine, most beautiful girl in the entire world- had actually fallen in love with me, too. The girl who used to be with my brother. With good, predictable, perfect, Saint Stefan. But no, she chose me.

And then I found out that was all bullshit. She only thinks she's in love with me because she's sired to me and has to do whatever makes me happy. Of course, she claims her feelings are real, that it's her heart and not the bond that makes her love me. Sure. But I know the truth; someone like her would never love someone like me. I'm too far out of my league. Of course the only way I'd ever get Elena Gilbert would be through magic.

I can't believe I'm taking the advice of a Bennett witch but here I am...Our loveable Bon-Bon suggested I try writing down my feelings instead of keeping them inside. I don't know what she's talking about. My feelings are best kept in a fine bottle of bourbon, not on sheets of paper that I leave outside your crypt like some kind of necro-stalker. I'm no Stefan with the journal-keeping, but letters seem less whiny somehow. I don't know what to do. There's no one else who would know how I'm supposed to handle Elena now. Because I've still got her, Rick. And all because of that long, horrible night...

...

She was crying and screaming and running around blabbering, saying everyone was dead, that everyone she loved would never be in that house again, that there was no point in going on anymore. It hurt so much to see her like that and I tried to stop her, but none of us could stop her. Elena wasn't listening. She started pouring kerosene all over everything and threatened to burn the house down, claiming we needed a cover story for Jeremy's death- but I think she just couldn't stand to be around that much sorrow anymore. I think she was trying to start over.

For a few seconds, none of us could do anything but sort of watch in horror. Then Stefan looked at me expectantly.

"Damon, help her."

I'll remember those three words for the rest of my life.

I knelt down next to her and smoothed her hair away from her tear-streaked face. "Elena…" I tried. I spoke gently even though I could barely hear myself over her sobs. "Elena."

"He's gone, Damon. Everyone's gone." Elena wailed. She clutched my shirt and kept talking and crying, although I couldn't even understand what she said through the inhuman noises she was making. I almost pulled away from her then; I had never seen her so helpless. But Stefan nodded at me, while Caroline looked on anxiously from behind the couch. I steeled myself and wrapped my arms around Elena. I could fix this. She needed me to fix this. First things first, I thought, holding her at arms' length.

"Elena," I said slowly, louder this time. "Do not burn the house down. I would be very unhappy if you burned your house down. Do you understand?" Elena nodded through her tears, and threw down the box of matches in one frustrated movement.

"Oh, thank God," I heard Blondie mutter under her breath behind me.

"B-but...but...what about Jeremy?" Elena sputtered. "What'll we tell people? What about his body? I'm so tired of seeing bodies, Damon!" I felt her start to tense up and shake.

"Shhhhhh," I cut in. "We'll figure something out. It's gonna be okay. I promise you, everything's gonna be okay. Do you believe me?"

"Yes," Elena choked out.

"But you can't freak out, okay? No more scaring us, Girl on Fire. You can cry, but stop freaking out. I want you to stop freaking out."

Elena sniffled, and gradually I felt her body relax. After a few moments her sobs grew quieter and quieter until she was just sitting with tears rolling down her cheeks, whimpering every now and then. She leaned into me and I pulled her into my lap, right there on the floor.

"My brother's dead, Damon."

None of us said anything for a long time, waiting to see if she'd go nuts again. But after what felt like an hour with nothing happening, I answered her since no one else did. "Yeah, Elena. Yeah, he is." I rested my chin on top of her head and closed my eyes with a sigh of relief. It had worked.

"It hurts so much...He was all I had left."

"I know," I kissed her hair over and over and let her cry. Time passed, I'm not sure how much. All I knew was that the woman I loved would've completely fallen apart if I hadn't stepped in, and there was no way I was gonna let that happen. Ever.

Blondie tiptoed over to us cautiously. "Ummmm, I'm gonna call my mom so she can...help us with this," she jerked her head towards Jeremy's corpse on the couch.

"And while Caroline does that I'll call Dr. Fell, I guess," Stefan volunteered. I nodded at both of them while still rocking Elena back and forth. Between the sheriff and the doctor, we'd cover our tracks with the police and the cause of death. No evidence of what really happened. Except the fragile bundle of sadness sitting in my lap.

I carried her upstairs to her room and there we stayed until Elena literally cried herself to sleep. I changed her out of her kerosene soaked clothes into the first PJs I could find, then laid her down tenderly on the bed. I kissed her forehead and tucked a blanket around her. "Goodnight, Elena. Sleep well," I whispered.

When I came downstairs, Caroline and Stef were cleaning up.

"We good?" I asked no one in particular. Blondie spoke first, all business.

"Uh, yeah. Dr. Fell officially states that Jeremy died from a fall down the stairs when he tripped over a tin of kerosene, which explains the smell. Mom made sure the police report doesn't have any incidence of foul play and Dr. Fell says Jeremy's body will be, um, ready for viewing by tomorrow afternoon so..." she trailed off, her eyes tilting upwards.

"Yeah," Stefan interrupted. "What exactly are you planning to do now? Because I distinctly remember telling you to release her from the sire bond days ago and yet, here we all are with Elena still bonded to you, so..."

I scoffed. "Gee, how about 'Thank you, Damon, for making sure Elena didn't go all pyro on our asses. Thank goodness the sire bond worked.'?"

"Thank goodness she has to do your bidding, you mean!" Caroline snapped.

I looked at her in disbelief. "Listen, Vampire Barbie, it's not like I did this on purpose. I'm not gonna force her into anything but don't you think this could come in handy sometimes? Like- I don't know- now?" Caroline instantly opened her mouth to retort but Stefan interrupted her, sighing.

"Caroline's right, Damon." He folded his arms. "But I'll ask you again: now what?"

"What's your problem?" I stared back and forth between the two of them. "You know no one in this room was more disappointed than I was when we found out Elena was sired to me…" I hesitated. "Because it means her feelings for me aren't real- "

"Let's hope not," Barbie muttered.

"Caroline…" Stefan admonished.

"Ughhh!" Tall, Blonde, and Leggy exclaimed, exhaling loudly. I narrowed my eyes at her and continued.

"But I can't release her- not yet, anyway. I just...can't," I finished helplessly. The other two started sputtering and I sped on. "But look, I can at least use it for good and not evil to help keep her crazy in check."

"The only problem with that is you don't know what good is!" Caroline practically shouted at me, sending the trash bag in her hands flying.

"Wait a sec- are you guys suggesting that I would take advantage of the sire bond?"

"Well…" Stefan shoved his hands into his pockets. "Okay, yeah. Kind of." He met my eyes then, daring me to deny it.

I zoomed in front of him. Inches away from his face, I said carefully, "I would never use the bond like that, to make her love me. I know it may seem like I'm just a selfish monster here, but that's not entirely true. Speaking of monsters...let's not delve into your ripper days, shall we?"

Stefan stepped toward me. "Listen, Damon- "

In a flash, Caroline was in between the two of us pushing us apart. "Okay, we get it, we get it. You both love Elena and don't want to see her forced to do anything she doesn't want to. That's what we all want here. And, actually, I sort of...agree with Damon, Stefan."

"Finally." I said.

"Seriously?" Stefan asked.

"Well, yeah," Barbie said slowly. "Now might not be the best time...I think we should at least wait until things have calmed down with Jeremy before we risk Elena's sanity. But Damon, here's the thing: it's not like she's a mindless robot waiting for an order. She's still herself, only...she's, like, brainwashed into doing whatever you say, like everything you say is a good idea."

"Maybe everything I say is a good idea. Did you ever think of that?" I smirked.

Stefan sighed again, drowning out whatever She-Stefan was about to say, like a father annoyed with his preschooler. "She has a point. Fine, you keep the sire bond- for now- and let's say we trust you completely (which we don't); what if you say something you don't even mean one day? She'll do anything you tell her to. You could say 'Walk in the sunlight without your magic ring, Elena.' and she'd do it."

"I'd never say that."

"Obviously, but- " Stefan retorted quickly but Caroline cut him off.

"You could say 'I really wish Stefan were dead. I want him staked and gone.'" Caroline spoke quietly. "You could totally say something like that offhand and she'd go and do it, Damon. Because it would please you. Because you want it."

We all were quiet for a few moments. Then Caroline broke the silence, continuing.

"You're going to have to be very, very careful about what you say from now on, Damon."

*Stefan's line about helping Elena is a direct quote from the series, not my own.

Author's Note: So what did everyone think? Please please leave me reviews! This is my very first Vampire Diaries fanfic and it helps me out so much to know how I'm doing! What do you think will happen now?