The Obligatory Spiel: All characters belong to their respective creators; I am only playing with them. Thanks for reading, and as always, R&R!
WARNING: This fic contains adult content. But if you didn't want it, you wouldn't have clicked! Don't read if the pairing(s) offend you.
Toujours Pur
Lily dropped her quill. Narcissa's eyes jumped from her parchment as the feather clinked to the stone floor. She watched as Lily scooted to the edge of the bench and leaned over gracefully to pick it up. Her red hair fell around her face and she flipped it over her shoulders as she sat back up. Narcissa caught a whiff of something flowery and tingled inside, averting her eyes quickly back to her parchment. Her cheeks warmed and she momentarily forgot which spell she was supposed to be writing down. Absently she scratched a star into a corner of the parchment.
A soft giggle came from the bench in front of Narcissa, but she didn't look up this time. She knew it was Lily. It was always Lily. Looking up would only bring more confusing feelings and desires Narcissa knew she should not be having. Instead, she turned her attention to the quiet boy next to her. His long, pale fingers fiddled absently with a tatty quill. His face was hidden beneath a curtain of heavy black hair, and only his long, pale nose was visible.
"Severus," Narcissa whispered, pushing her parchment towards him. "Which comes after Colloportus?"
The boy turned his head and his knuckles gripped his quill. He glanced at Narcissa's parchment. "You haven't even finished Colloportus," he said quietly.
Narcissa looked at the paper and discovered the blank spot beneath the spell-name. "Oh," she mumbled. "Right."
She turned back to her own space. Severus Snape was never the easiest boy to get close to, but Narcissa was usually sitting with him, their pale skin and greens of their uniforms separating them from the bright reds and golds of the beloved Gryffindors in the row ahead of them. Narcissa was quiet and found it difficult to make friends. Her older sister was only there when she needed something, and her younger sister was a social butterfly and had friends of her own in her own year. Not by choice, Narcissa almost always ended up alone, but next to Severus. She didn't mind the rumors; it didn't disturb her that everyone thought she and Severus were together.
"Episkey," Severus' voice cut through Narcissa's musings.
"What?" She whispered, wishing he would just look up so she could at least have a face to match a voice.
"Episkey," he repeated. "That's the next spell we are to learn. It's a healing spell, page twenty-eight."
Narcissa waited, never sure when Severus was done speaking. "Thank you," she said finally as she busied herself with her spell book. Severus' head lowered again and someone coughed lightly. Narcissa found the page and began to read, but the words became melded together and meaningless as her imagination returned to the read-head in front of her.
Lily Evan's was beautiful. Many boys wanted to be hers and girls wanted to look like her. Her presence was soft and alluring, and she was always the top of the class. Narcissa envied her like all the others, but her envy was getting out of hand. She could hardly be close to her in class anymore, and every time she saw Lily walking down the corridors or passed her on the staircases, her heart leapt. She was unable to sleep without thinking about her, and she found herself constantly wondering where she was and what she was doing.
Narcissa had never had a crush before, and Lily was a girl. She was terrified of what everyone would think if they knew, but she was more terrified of herself for feeling this way. Bellatrix was already engaged, and their mother was already discussing plans for Narcissa, though she wouldn't come of age for at least five years. Narcissa hoped that would be enough time for her infatuation to disappear. Perhaps it was all a practical joke; a simple but cruel spell that did not reflect directly on Narcissa's personality.
At least that is what she hoped…
---
"Does mother know all your stockings have holes?" Bellatrix kicked her sister's foot as she walked across the serpent-green carpet of the Slytherin common room. Narcissa didn't reply, but clutched her book closer to her lap.
Bella fell into a large chair, sighing as she put her dusty black boots up on the table by the fire. Her black frizzles of hair hung freely around her head and her dark eyes reflected the fire. Narcissa self-consciously curled her legs up beneath her to hide her holey socks. Why should it matter to Bella? Her stockings were always falling down and most of the time she refused to wear undershirts. Still, Narcissa resolved to find a new pair of stockings the next morning.
There were a few other Slytherin's in the commons, but they were all first-years. Narcissa was surprised Bella was letting them have their peace. Normally she would be inflicting pesky curses on the defenseless young wizards.
"So how's Snivellus?" Bella smirked.
Narcissa glowered at her sister. She knew the only reason Bella asked was to get her going. With her stresses with Lily and the long day wearing on her, Narcissa was definitely going. She let her eyes grow as cold as she knew how, and slammed her book. She stood from the floor and brushed off her skirt. Bella watched her suspiciously as she walked towards the staircase to the dormitory.
"So you're to snogging now, are you!?" Bella shouted towards her. The first-years looked up from a chess-game. Narcissa stopped dead at the foot of the stairs and turned abruptly, her long blonde hair slapping her cheeks.
Before she knew what she was doing, she was lunging at her sister. Bella must have seen it coming, because by the time Narcissa got there she was standing. Narcissa pushed herself into her sister and the momentum sent them both to the floor. The first-years squealed with surprise and stood from the table.
"Cissy!" Bella roared, trying to get on top of her sister. "Get off me!"
Narcissa was silent, too angry to yell or scream. She could feel hot tears building on her lids and her heart was threatening to break through her ribcage. She didn't even know what she intended to do to Bellatrix; she never had it in her to cause pain. Instead, she put all her weight on Bella's stomach and fought against her arms and fingernails.
"Cissy, stop!" Bella said again, this time managing to hold her sister off long enough for Narcissa to tire and sit back. The tears began to pour and Narcissa let herself break down. Bella didn't move but didn't try to offer comfort. She let her sister cry a moment before she sat up on her elbows and rolled Narcissa off of her.
"I don't know what's gotten into you, Cissy," Bella said quietly, fixing her skirt.
Narcissa sat on her knees on the floor, her tears
blurring her vision and making the fire dance and run in colours.
"Bugger off!" Bella turned to the group of first-years who still stood next to the table in anticipation for more. Their eyes widened at her tone and they hurried up the stairs.
Narcissa got to her feet, determined to make it back to her cold, dark bed to let her tears fall, but Bella grabbed her shoulder.
"Cissy," she said in an oddly light tone. "I am much more powerful than you. Never do that again."
Her eyes glinted again and Narcissa's anger abated and was replaced with solid, cold fear. Her sister was more powerful than her. She had more years of magic and was far braver than Narcissa. But apart from that, Bellatrix was almost completely deranged. Narcissa knew there is not much she wouldn't do in the way of violence and harm, even to her own sisters.
As she broke gazes with Bella, Narcissa left the warmth of the blazing fire and padded up the cold stone steps to the dormitories. Perhaps she was spending too much time with Severus.
TBC
