Dear readers,

believe it or not, but I'm back! :D

Addek isn't dead, so here's the first part of a little two-shot I wrote. It is set in mid season 4 of Grey's (after Derek's and Meredith's break up).

Of course I don't own anything.

The title "Here's to us" is borrowed from the song "Here's to us" by Halestorm.

I hope you'll have fun reading it and I would be really happy, if you left a review.

Love Mariella

Here's to us

Derek and Mark met out of the Chief's office. Mark grinned at Derek "So, what did you do, that you're here?"

Derek shrugged his shoulders. "You?"

"Seriously, dunno."

They knocked and entered. Chief Webber looked at them. "Sit down. So you're probably wondering why you're here. We'll get a difficult case in the evening. Pregnant mother, who's babies heart is growing out of the body and the mother has a seriously brain injury."

Derek nodded. "So you want us to work together."

Chief Webber nodded. "Who is the OB/GYN?" Mark asked „And please tell me that it isn't that idiot Johnes." Derek and Mark both groaned. They really didn't like him and he wasn't talented at all.

Chief Webber looked at them seriously "You're talking about your colleague!" He told them, what made Derek and Mark look down like little school boys. "But … you're right. I don't want him on this case. I already have someone, but I want you to be nice, because otherwise I'm pretty sure she will leave as soon as she arrives!"

"Please, we're always …" Derek started, but Mark stopped him. "You called Addison, right?"
Richard nodded. "I know that you three got along better in the past, but … you three are a good team. I want you on this case together."
Derek and Mark nodded. "Actually" Derek started "Addison and I talked via phone the last month. We're good."
Richard looked at him surprised. "Really?"

Derek nodded and Mark added "And since we want to prove our good will, we'll pick her up from the airport. When will we she arrive?"

Richard looked at his watch. "In an hour."

Derek and Mark stood up. "Great see you later then." Richard looked at them when they left the room and shoke his head.

An hour later Derek and Mark were waiting for Addison at the airport. Mark bought some flowers for her. When they saw her leaving the terminal they had to admit she looked great. She was more tanned than usual and her hair was dark red. When she noticed the two she grinned and came up to them. "Hey I didn't expect you two here. Did Richard drag you to pick me up?"

Mark grinned. "We of course volunteered." He hugged her, kissed her right cheek and gave her the flowers. "Good to have you here."
Addison smiled. "Thanks." She then looked at Derek, almost a bit shy. "Hey."
Derek smiled at her. "Hey." He hugged her too and kissed her on both cheeks. "You look great. L.A. suits you." He picked her suitcase and groaned "And still you don't travel lightly." He grinned.

Addison stuck her tongue out. "Let's go."

The next days Richard noticed that things with the three of them almost went back to how they once were. Addison, Derek and Mark were almost always seen together, seemed to have fun and joked around. He almost saw them back in internship. The surgery went really good, the three of them worked in great sync and after a few scares they managed to save the baby and mother. Derek and Addison left the or together. Derek smiled at Addison, when she put down her scrub cap and leaned against the wall. "You were amazing." He smiled at her. She looked back at him. "You weren't that bad yourself." She grinned. He moved closer. "Know what, Mark and I were good, but you were … you are brilliant. I missed working with you."

"Thanks. I missed that too." She looked up and saw that he was only inches apart. The tension was noticeable and thick. Derek looked deep into her eyes and moved closer. Their bodies were almost touching now. When Addison bit her lower lip he couldn't control himself anymore. He crashed his lips onto hers. He pushed her into the wall and got as close as possible. She groaned, but started to reply his kiss, which went more passionate every minute. The sexual tension was getting thicker and thicker. Slowly Derek put his hands under Addison's scrub top and moved it upwards. In the moment Addison felt his hand on her bare skin something snapped. What did she do? What did he do? What did they do? She backed away from him forcefully and looked at him. He looked back and saw so many emotions in her eyes: anger, hurt, desperation, surprise, shock and something he couldn't right place.

"No." Was the only word she said, before she turned around and nearly ran from him. Derek was in shock that he couldn't move for a while. When he wanted to get back in motion, Mark entered the room. "Hey, where's … oh no! What did you do?"

"Nothing." Derek protested, but when Mark looked at him, he finally said, "Maybe we kissed."
Mark looked around. "Since she's gone, it must have been a pretty bad kiss …"
"Not funny Mark. She … she only said no and ran."
"Can you blame her?"
"What?"
"You broke her."
"Mark, I think …"
"No, you broke her when you stopped noticing her. That's the reason she ran. She's afraid, but maybe YOU finally know what or better who you want."

"What are you talking about?"
"Tell me why you really broke up with Meredith and not the crap you told everyone …"

"I … we …"

"I can tell you. You noticed that she's not the woman you wanted. She never was. You liked her because she was nothing like Addie, because she didn't remind you of Addie in any way. Maybe that was good, when you came here, but after Addison and you got divorced, after she left you noticed that isn't what you wanted. It was always Addison you wanted. Addison's yours just as you're hers. This started the day you met and it won't stop. When you saw her, you lost your heart and she still has it and you still have hers. That's because Meredith and you didn't work out, that's because Addie and her cop didn't work out, because after all the years, all the pain, all the drama and tears, you two are still in love with each other."

Derek was silent for a while. "Why are you telling me that? I know you love her."
"I do, but I was and am always only a good friend to her. She never wanted me to be more. The thing between us back in New York only happened, because she was hurt and lonely and I was there. I want her to be happy. I always wanted her to be. So are you going after her or what?!"

Derek looked at him. "You know what Mark. Sometimes the people don't give you enough credit for your advices."
Mark grinned. "I know, simply call me great."
Derek rolled his eyes. "You wish." He went to the door. "See you later?"
Mark grinned. "Sure. I'll look after our patients. Go search Addie."

Derek went in search for Addison and after some time he went to the rooftop. She saw he standing there overlooking Seattle. He went up to her. "Hey."

Addison didn't look at him. "Hey. What are you doing up here?"

"I was searching for you."

Addison turned her head a little and the late afternoon sun let her hair gleam. "Why?"

"Because I think we should talk."
"Derek, really, we shouldn't talk, at least about this. It was … it happened and …"

"No! You're wrong!" Derek interrupted her. He almost screamed. Addison was surprised and finally looked at him. He then continued talking much calmer. "It happened, because I wanted it to happen. When we were in the or, there were so many memories. Do you remember your first c-section or when you didn't agree with your resisdent and he kicked you out and when he noticed later that you were absolutely right or our first operation together? Of course you do and there are so many more situations to remember with you. I will never forget when you waited in my office with only you lab coat. God, I remember that I thought, how the hell could I get so lucky?! I know I told you that I broke up with Meredith, because we didn't want the same thing and it wasn't completely a lie, but … I broke up with her, because she didn't have my heart. She never truly had it. I lost it when I met you. On the first day when we met, when you walked into the lecture hall wearing this amazing purple dress and a bright smile. I thought, gosh, that's the girl I wanna marry and I never thought I would stand a chance with you, but I knew I at least had to try and for some unknown reason, you went out with me, you married me even. I lost my heart the very first day Addison and I never got it back, but the thing is and I only noticed it now, I don't want to have it back. Please, I know I have been a jerk and I hurt you, but I'm a jerk, who still loves you."

Addison looked at him for a long while. She knew he was serious. "Derek, I don't know … we hurt each other so bad. Why should it be different this time?"

Derek hugged her and whispered in her ear. "Because now I know what life is like without you."

Addison smiled slightly. "Derek this kiss …"

Derek grinned. "It was a great kiss."
"It was, but …"

Derek leaned in, "No but …" and closed the last distance between them and kissed her. Addison needed a little moment, before she replied the kiss. When Derek backed softly away, because he had to breath, he asked "Are you running again, when I lost my hold of you."
Addison laughed softly. "If I were you, I wouldn't risk it."

Derek smiled and they stood on the rooftop for a while.

Pretty please, leave a review! 3