To be completely honest, I don't even know where this came from. I've kinda just fantisized about Ulquiorra being a sexy 40's soldier for ages. That and I'm in love with the forties. We have a love affair goin' on. Any whoodly-doodly. Basic background is that this is set during WWI, but sometimes forties influence will come in, like 'the swing' and various music, a la "Lets Misbehave" By Cole Porter. The forties was a fun time, while 1914 was still a bit stale, so outside of the war, it has the forties influencing it, inside the war, it is purely 1914. I know alot of crap about WWI, so... I can say this story will be pretty accurate.
Most of the chapters will be in letter form, at times they will set down those golden fountain pens of theirs and narrate their lives as they live it. You can expect appearances from Aizen, Gin, Grimmjow, Momo, Ichigo, Rangiku, Nell ect. Hmmm, What else needs to be known...
Uh, Aizen won't be the bad guy, nor will he rape anyone, so get that out of your mind right now. Kay?
Hmmm... I think that's about it, if you have further questions then simply PM me or put it in ya Review.
P.s, This is the letter from Orihime to Ulquiorra. Just thought you should know :D
Ulquiorra,
I have trouble writing this as I know you may never receive it, though I very much hope you do. And I know you told me not to write, but how could I obey? When I know that during those nights in the trenches, this letter could be the only thing to give you hope. Should I have believed you truly wished it; I would stop my pen from its script this very second and hide it in my drawer forever. Should I have the strength, I would have obeyed you when you told me not to wait for you. But I do not have that strength, nor do I believe you no longer want my words. So I will keep writing, every day, so that maybe, when you're in those trenches looking up at the starry night, you'll think of me.
I watched your train leave with tears in my eyes. You told me not to cry, but these silly emotions get the better of me. I stood at that platform for hours, still imagining that you were there with me, still feeling your touch, unable to believe that you were really gone – taken from me in an instant.
I've closed my eyes several times to remember how you smell and the way you feel. The day you left I held your face in my hands, and that is a memory that shall forever be embedded into my mind. I remember how we stood at the train's platform among hundreds of other couples embracing, and even though they were there, and women were crying, I couldn't hear any of it. It was just you and me. Us, together. In those last moments, there was no one else in the world, you were all I saw.
You stood straight and confident at first; there was not a fragment of fear in those emerald eyes of yours, just cold, hard determination. But once you saw me falter, your eyes became soft and within a second your hand was at my cheek, your thumb slowly caressing the skin from my lips to my jaw. "You'll be alright." You said in a voice that set my body on fire. It's the same voice that I hear in my dreams, and often throughout the day. A voice that makes my heart beat whenever it reaches my ears.
I turned away as tears welled up in my eyes. I could feel the pain rising up in my chest, forming a sob. But I didn't let go of it. I wanted to be strong for you. To prove that I could be the way you wanted me to be, but you could see through my façade, as always, and raised my chin to face you. You looked at me with such intensity that I truly believed you were seeing my soul. Your lips were so close, I could almost taste them. The thought of it made my heart jump. "Please," You said, with those tortured eyes staring back into me, "Don't cry."
I've never made it a secret of how I felt for you, and I know that you have made it clear that I am nothing more than a friend to you, but in that moment, my imagination got the better of me, and I fooled myself into believing that you may have loved me too. At the time you thought I was crying simply because you were leaving, but it was more than that; I was in love with a man who could never love me in return.
Your fingertips reached my hair, and I sank into your warm, soft hand. You allowed me to stay there longer than you usually would, and I thought you had finally begun to crack, but then I realized that you were simply giving me something to remember during the time you were gone. An agonized sob escaped me, and I felt embarrassed from all the tears streaming down my face. But you were sure to wipe them away with your thumb before they hit the ground. "Orihime…"
I looked up to see that your expression was just as agonized as I felt, but there was no love behind them, it was more of an anger, anger that I had refused to let you go, anger that I was still crying. You have always told me that I should learn to love another. You have always said that you were no good for me, continuously reminding me that you would never be able to learn to love me. And I've accepted that, wholeheartedly. But that doesn't mean I'll just let you go.
"You must stop this." You said, firmly. Your hand swept my hair back behind my ear before traveling down to hold a firm grip on shoulders. You bent down a little so that you were in my line of sight. You shook your head fractionally before sighing, "Where will crying get you?" Your eyes searched my face for a moment as you waited for my answer. Once you found that I wasn't able to speak any longer, you continued for me, "This sadness that you feel, it will do you no good. No matter how much you cry, the war will not cease, nor will I be able to turn my back on these men. Regardless of if you fall to your knees and beg, the outcome will still be the same." You paused and slid your hands down my arms before catching my hands, "But if you let go of this foolish love, you will no longer feel such sadness. And you'll be able to live your life as a young woman should."
I stared at you incredulously; the thought of feeling love for you no longer was incomprehensive to me. For a moment, my tears ceased, and I finally had the courage to speak, "You say that as if it is easy to simply let go of you. And I have tried, the good lord knows I have tried, but no matter how hard I try, I am not able to do it. My heart can't stand of being rid of the feeling I have whenever I'm with you, nor can my mind. My love for you is like oxygen, I cannot live without it."
You hung your head and your hands left mine to remain at your side. "This I know." You said weakly before squaring your shoulders and looking back at me with determination, "Which is why I must leave. Hopefully, the longer I am gone, the sooner you will rid of this horrid poison that consumes you."
I shook my head in disbelief of the words that were coming from your beautiful mouth, "Love is no poison!" I told you incredulously, wanting you to be rid of such pessimism. "It may consume us, but in doing so, it brings us the feeling of complete bliss."
"This therefore classifies it as a drug." You spoke back harshly. "It is something that hooks onto you and consumes you in such a way that you cannot imagine a world without it. It draws you into believing things that are not there – it makes you blind. It brings jealousy and hate and, should your desired feel nothing for you, it will only bring you pain. It's a demon that simply disguises itself as an emotion."
I drew myself back slightly, unable to comprehend what I was hearing. How could one feel such an emotion as hate towards love? It was unheard of. Should anyone have felt love, they would know that it was no poison. But I could not make you feel love, nor could I simply tell you how it felt, so instead I made a wish,"I do hope that love finds its way into your heart, my dear Ulquiorra. And in turn, I hope that the woman you desire feels the same unconditional love that I feel for you, so that you can feel optimistic that the world is not such a horrid place as you describe it to be, and that you shall no longer have eyes filled with such pain."
You stepped back from me, your expression a palette of mixed emotions, and your mouth slightly ajar. I wish more than anything that I was able to know what you were thinking at that moment, and to know what you were about to say before the conductor called all men aboard. Your head turned at his announcement and for the first time you looked beyond me, seeing all the women and men who were now leaving each other's embrace only to kiss one another goodbye. My heart twisted as I imagined such a farewell for us both, only for it to never come.
You turned back to me and moved closer, you took my hand in yours, "Look after yourself, Orihime. Find someone who will love you back. I don't want you to spend your life waiting."
I gave a single humorless laugh at the ground and looked back up at you. My hand reached out to your uniform and spread the wrinkles across it, secretly enjoying the feel of your body beneath my hands. They stayed there longer than was necessary, and I could feel my heart beating rapidly in my chest. I refused to let you leave like this. So I stood up, on my toes and kissed you on your cheek, only millimeters away from the corner of your mouth. I heard you exhale softly, and when I pulled back your eyes had only just begun to open. "Promise me you'll come back alive."
You shook your head, and spoke softly, "I cannot promise you that."
The tears started to well up in my eyes again, and I could hear my every resolve breaking. If you stayed any longer, you would be in danger of drowning in my tears. My heart was breaking, and I felt as if every organ in my body was being ripped out from me. This pain, this unbelievable pain was unbearable. "Then at least promise you will die happy."
You gave a single nod and brushed my hair back one last time as the conductor called out the second time, "I'll be seeing you."
""Preferably on earth." I croaked out. Watching you as the corner of your lip twitched before giving a final nod of goodbye and boarding the train that was to lead you to war. I stood there, among hundreds of women and children, holding back the tears that could drown me, holding back the sobs that brought me pain, and watching, as all the men responded to their loved ones with declarations of their love.
A part of me still wished that you would jump off that train and kiss me like it was your last. A part of me wished that you would at least smile, and wave, promising a better tomorrow where you would love me. But all I could see as that train continued on down the rails was your emerald eyes, staring. Only staring, until you were completely out of sight.
I closed my eyes that threatened to burst, and pushed back all emotion, feeling only the numb that you left me with. I gave one deep breath, and then two, to stop myself from hyperventilating and fainting on that cold platform. I could hear all the single women, crying out for their men, and the children that were screaming for their fathers to come back.
One by one, they left. And soon, I was the only person on that platform, eyes still closed, and forever alone. When I opened my eyes, the moon had replaced the sun, but even then it was clouded by the darkness of the grey clouds that threatened a storm. I thought it fitting, as if even the sky knew that the darkness had taken over our light, as though the heavens were crying for all those that would be lost. For all the men that had left their country behind. For all the inevitable death the war was to bring.
Ulquiorra, I know that I'm foolish in loving a man who cannot love me back. And I know you wish to inflict no pain upon me. I have brought this upon myself and I cannot escape from it. When you come back, I won't expect you to love me, nor do I expect you to feel anything for me by these letters, I only wish that they remind you how much you are loved, and that you will always have someone waiting for you back home. I can't predict the future events in this conflict, but I can predict that my love for you is eternal. I've always loved you and I always will.
I hope that in this war, you succeed in what you're fighting for. Aim careful, and look the devil in the eye, don't let them take you alive.
Every night I watch the sunset and soak up every last ray of its warmth, and send it from my heart to yours.
Yep, Okay, So tell me what you think, tell me what you want to see in this fic, tell me some ideas if you have any that are so brilliant they simply MUST be in this fic. Okayyyy?
Good.
