Pam knew that Michael standing on the roof as if he were going to jump was just another one of his stupid stunts, but she was uncomfortable. She was uncomfortable at Dunder Mifflin a lot. Michael had a penchant for sexual harassment, Dwight was... Dwight, and worst of all, she worked 5 feet away from the man she loved, but had shot him down, twice. However, none of this was making her uncomfortable as she listened to Michael bellow from the roof of the building about depression. No, she was upset now because she had more than once played a situation like this in her head, but she was in Michael's place, and there was no bouncy castle to cushion her fall. Of course, today had been worse than normal. At first, it was fine. Kevin, Oscar, Karen, and Jim were all betting on the jellybeans in her jar. She was even joking around with Karen, but then Kevin, in his childlike unawareness of socially acceptable conversation topics, brought up all the times that Jim used to come to reception. Come to her. He loved her, and she had pushed him away. Damnit, how could she be so stupid. Later, when she was the only one left in the office, she paced back and forth, writing in a small leather journal. Although her main forms of art were in her watercolors and doodles, she wrote poetry when she was feeling stressed or sad or angry. When Jim walked through the door around 5:45, she dropped the notebook and gasped.

"Woah, sorry. I didn't think you'd still be here. I just forgot my blackberry." He explained. He bent over to pick up the journal. "Oh, what's this. Beesley's got a diary."

"Oh, Jim, please dont-" Pam requested, but it was too late. The smile on his face had dropped away, likely due to the tearstains on the page. There was a risk of him adding to these stains as he read what was written in the journal.

"Staring up

into the sun,

Wondering what it would be like to

Fall.

The cool whooshing air

Relief with finality.

How beautiful it must be

To feel the pain

all at once

and then,

Never

again.

Oh God,

I'm falling.

I've been falling

Forever

You tried to catch me,

but I denied you

for a hole-defaced parachute,

because it sat comfortably on my back.

Now you're gone

and it's gone,

but I'm still falling.

Perhaps

the shatter of my bones on my pavement

will be a sickeningly sweet

relief."

"Pam, did you-"

"It's nothing," she said defensively, snatching the book back.

"Bullshit, Pam." Jim said.

"What do you care?" Pam lashed out. "You have a girlfriend who makes your good-paying job bearable! You've moved on!"

"I have a girlfriend, and my good-paying job is bearable, but there's no way in hell I've moved on, Beesly. I still think about you every damn day."

Pam was stunned silent. She just looked at her notebook, his shoes, anything that wasn't his eyes.

"Pam, I love you. Please let me help you get help."

"Jim, Karen. I don't want to be a homewrecker."

"That was never going to last, Pam. You're not a homewrecker, but please give me a definite "yes" on therapy before we change the subject again."

"Yes." Pam nodded, letting one tear roll down her cheek. Jim pulled her in and kissed the crown of her head. Little did Pam know that only a few short years later, Jim would be kissing her head the exact same way, the only difference being a ring on their respective left-hand ring fingers.