Title: pity party
Character/Pairing: Percy, Calypso
A/N: Found this old thing in my folders. It's going to burn your eyes.
Summary: A half-truth sits heavily on his chest and he cannot utter it. He can't say the words to prove her wrong.
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"Are you happy?"
The question catches him off guard and Percy almost drops his chicken leg. Light-headed, he turns to Calypso. "Yeah."
She looks down at her plate, biting her lip, before looking back at him. "Truly?"
"Well…mostly." He actually drops the chicken leg this time. He hadn't meant to say that. Above him, the moon shines brightly, lighting up their dinner picnic. Maybe he's just tired. It is late, after all.
Calypso picks at her food, twirling her noodles with her fork as she stares at him. "Go on."
"My mom's blue pancakes. I…miss them. Her. Everyone. Grover, Annabeth, Rachel." He needs to cover his mouth, these are not the words he wants to say. And still they pour out, like a dam bursting. "I didn't think I would miss them like this."
Calypso's fork stills, and she puts it down. Her lips curve down slightly and she nods. "I see."
"But it's not bad here." Percy manages to recover, shaking his foggy head to clear it up. "I like being here. With you. It's fun. A little weird, but fun."
She smiles at the last part.
"Weird?"
"Well, I mean, it's like a camping trip on a tropical island, but everything is so easy. And you like to eat the strangest things." He gestures at her plate, at the noodles mixed with various pieces of cake and the odd red sauce floating over it all. "I guess immortality makes you want to try everything, even if you shouldn't. Not that I can complain, I eat blue things."
She laughs. It's brief, too brief, and Percy knows, just knows, there is something more to these questions.
With a sigh, she pushes her plate away, her expression sobering. "I told you before that the worst part of the curse was knowing. I knew that the person I found on the beach was someone I could love. Would love." Percy tries to speak, but she brings her finger up to her lip and shakes her head. "And I knew that when I gave them the choice, just what they would choose. I knew the ending to every story."
"But I stayed," Percy cuts in.
"Yes, you did." She smiles again, but sadly this time. "You did."
The silence is awkward for a moment and she reaches out to grab his hand. He feels warm, dizzy almost.
"I don't think I ever really understood the curse before now." She looks down, staring at his hand, tracing the veins with her fingers. It's quiet again, the crashing waves in the distance all he can hear.
"What is the curse then?" Percy doesn't want to hear the answer. He needs to anyways.
She doesn't look up as she asks a question of her own. "Do you regret it?"
"No, not entirely. Just when I think of home. " And even now, he can't stop being so brutally honest.
"Why did you stay?"
And this, this is the point of no return. The break it or make it question.
And he knows even before he utters the first syllable he will break it.
"I…I couldn't leave you here. Alone. I just…I'm the kid in a prophecy that could destroy everything. Everyone." He clenches his hand into a fist, all the fears and worries bubbling over. "I'm not a hero. I'm all that smart or anything and I…I screw up. Always. But…here…I don't have to be the hero. Or brave. Or anything. And… I might not be able to save everyone, but I could help you."
"And how do you feel about me?"
"I like you."
"Ah." Calypso removes her hand now and the sad smile is back. "I love you, you know."
Percy tries to reply, but his mouth is heavy. Every movement feels slow, like he's pushing through water.
"I love you. But you…"
He starts to see spots, blotches of black in the scene. "Whaaaa—" he manages, catching the tears in her eyes as she watches him.
"You stayed out of pity. And pity will never become love." His eyes slid close and before he falls into the black, he can hear her last words. "And that is the curse."
-x-
He wakes up the next morning on a raft, blue seas all around him. In the distance he can see New York, the towering sky scrapers dominating the horizon.
A half-truth sits heavily on his chest and he cannot utter it. He can't say the words to prove her wrong.