Disclaimer: I own nothing.
Dedicated: To those who decide to read it.
Rating: T for some language….
!SPOILERS! (that I'm sure you already knew, seeing as I am way behind on this fic. It's a post EitB, of course)
Pudding
When I opened my eyes, I was blinded by bright sterile lights: Instinct told me I was in a hospital. The persistent beeps of the heart rate machine assured me of this fact. Why was I here? I couldn't remember. All I could remember is that "I had this weird dream."
"Booth. Booth."
A woman stood above me smiling a smile so brilliant, her blue eyes bright with joy. I remember her. She was in my dream. She certainly should be in my dreams- she was gorgeous.
"You're awake."
She laughed and her eyes began to tear up. She grinned, showing her brilliant white teeth. Her tears were of happiness and relief. She had been grieving. As she drew closer I could see the dark rings of red and blue under her eyes, not that it detracted from her beauty, by no means did it. Had she been crying? Grieving? Who was she? This beautiful woman, was she an angel of sorts? Was I dead? Or was this merely another dream? But she was so damn familiar. That dream.
"It was so real."
"Your operation was a success, but reacted poorly to the anesthesia."
What operation? I couldn't remember a thing! Why couldn't I remember? Was this the source of her grieving and sleepless nights? Had I been the one to cause the tears she shed? I wanted nothing more than to dry her tears, and see that full and magnificent smile I knew she possessed.
"You've been in a coma for four days. It took you so long to wake up."
Her tears were threatening to fall anew. They glistened in the unbearably bright lights, like crystals exposed to sunlight, a prism of colors. I didn't understand. This woman was so compassionate, so kind. But I did not recognize her. I did not know who she was. Was she a figment of my imagination? A manifestation of my dream? That dream. The people. The places. The love. And the sex. It was so tangible. It was so vivid.
"It felt so real."
"It wasn't," the woman reassured me. So this was reality? Who the hell was she? Her angular face, with skin that seemed so soft, I just wanted to touch it, just to see if my mind was playing tricks on me or this really was reality. And those eyes, those cerulean eyes swirling with hurt, pain, relief and maybe even love, they spoke volumes. Her eyes told me that she was intelligent, wise way beyond her years. I knew what she was feeling, though I did not recognize her personally. She wore her heart on her sleeve, she trusted me. She was familiar to me, so fucking familiar, so why the hell didn't I know who she was, when she clearly knew who I was? I couldn't contain it within me any longer. It came out before I could stop it.
"Who are you?"
And I knew I might as well have stabbed her with a knife through the heart. She inhaled sharply. Her eyes told it all. She pulled away, betrayed. A crystal rolled across the smooth plains of her cheek. And then another. Fuck it all, I wanted to take it back, I did. With her back to me, I could hear her muffled sobs. I wanted to take her in my arms, make the hurt go away. I tried to get out of my bed, I did. The sheets rustled, giving my intention away. She whipped around to face me. It was the most heartbreaking sight I can ever recall seeing.
"Don't. Just, don't. Your still weak."
Her voice was soft. She tried to disguise the pain. Her demure became cold and distant. Why did I do it?
"I need to leave, for now. A doctor should come to see you soon enough."
Fan-fucking-tastic. I made her leave. My heart broke in two. The shaky breaths she took to calm herself did not go unnoticed by me. And I did all I could do.
"I'm sorry."
"I just need…I just need time."
"Will you be back?"
"Maybe. I hope so. Everything happens eventually, right?"
And she laughed again, but it was unlike before. It was pained, reminiscing and it sounded so damn familiar. Her frown was set back in place. She stared at the linoleum tiles on the floor. She wiped at her eyes.
"Everything happens eventually."
I echoed her words. They tasted like sweets that you know you've had before but you just can't remember what the damned candy was called and when you had it last. She left her laptop open on the little desk the hospital had provided her with. Slowly, as if participating in a mourning march, she retreated towards the door.
"Temperance Brennan. But just call me Bones."
"What?"
"My name. It's Temperance. But you called me Bones. Even when I didn't like it."
I smiled. She left without another word, without another tear, out to the other side of the door, where I could just barely make out another figure of a woman attempting to console her. Temperance was strong-willed, I could tell. She would be back, eventually. She would, or I'll be damned. She shrugged off the other women's comfort, and escaped away.
Bones. She was my Bones. Even when I couldn't remember anything else I always knew she was my Bones. Beautiful and forever passionate, the ice queen was a mere mask this woman wore.
________________________________________________
I was right. She came back and sooner than expected. Exhaustion had overcome my body once more and just as before, once sleep had released its hold on me, there she was, back in that same goddamned uncomfortable plastic chair with the laptop in her lap. The only difference this time, was all the lights were turned off. The faint glow of the screen illuminated her face as she frantically typed away. She was truly a sight to behold, even in her most mundane moments.
I thanked God for this lovely companion who never seemed to give up. For a few moments longer, I watched her. She would type and type, pause, hit the delete key and begin anew. After the third or fourth time completing this routine, she looked up and over her screen towards my bed. There were no more tears, not even watery eyes. The icy mask had vanished. A genuine smile had replaced it all.
"You sleep like a stone."
"Rock, Bones, rock."
I realized after I had said it, that my statement was quite rude, but it just rolled off the tongue so naturally. To my surprise, her smile grew still, though I did not fully understand why, after all I had corrected her.
"The doctor was here. I kind of yelled at him a bit. I hoped I hadn't woken you, but there you were still sleeping as though nothing had happened. He told me you have a serious case of amnesia."
It was still hard for her to cope, as she struggled to ward off the tears once more. But this time, no tears fell.
"He said," her breath hitched, "he said you'll slowly regain your memory. He doesn't know how quickly, as most cases vary. He said it could take hours or it could take weeks."
She approached my bedside, and reached for my hand. Her eyes never ceased to amaze me. They had changed, they were kind and forgiving, so different from the hurt the held earlier. And as she spoke to me, she held my hand, stroking it with her thumb. It was so peaceful and calm-inducing. It brought a strong sense of comfort and home.
"In the meantime, the doctor told me, spending time with familiar people and objects might possibly help you regain your memories a bit quicker. I don't know how accurate this is, but at this point, I'll put my science aside, but only this once. Don't get too used to it."
We chuckled. An instinct of sorts, call it my gut told me, for her to put aside her ideas of science was a big deal. A pregnant pause permeated our laughter. And all was somber once more.
"I'm sorry, you know. About before."
"Me too."
"It's not your fault."
I loved that she had to have forgiven me, a huge weight had been lifted from my shoulders. My lack of memory was a burden I could not carry alone, but with her by my side, it was almost bearable. This woman had drawn me in so quickly. She had an allure about her that seemed incredibly unique. It would take time to heal this gaping hole of memories in my mind, that I knew for certain. I hated that I still couldn't remember who she was or what she meant to me. I felt so useless, so unworthy of this human goddess' prescence. She let go of my hand, and I immediately felt the loss of human comfort. She walked to her purse and dug through it until she found what she was looking for.
"I brought you something."
In her hand she held two cups of pudding and a beautiful smile on her face. A reconciliation, of sorts. She was ready to remember, again, together.
A/N: The end. Fin. I thought it was a good place to end. I had this image of Bones and Booth eating pudding together again to re-bond, and I couldn't help myself.
Hope you enjoyed, I'm a bit rusty right now. Review! Thank you!