A/N - This story is based off the song True Colours. Any mistakes are my own. Chapter two has been written and will be uploaded on Sunday or Monday. I hope you like it.
Disclaimer - I do not own NCIS or any of it's associated characters/ideas. No copyright infringement intended.
Tony sighed as he picked up a pen. It had been a hard day. He could see her struggling with the memories. While others saw a strong and beautiful woman, he could see through her, everyday he looked into her eyes and he could see through to the lost little girl that wanted nothing more than to cry. It was killing him. He had to tell her.
My Dearest Ziva
It can be hard to take courage in this world, so full of people bustling about everywhere. Always in to much of a hurry to just stop and see the people around them. Sometimes you can loose sight of yourself, the real you that lives deep inside, of your hopes and dreams. Sometimes the darkness inside, it can threaten to overwhelm you. It makes you feel small and weak. It tells you that showing any of this is weakness.
Ziva, this is not true. I see it in you. I see your true colours. They shine through in your eyes if you just take the time to look and Ziva, that is why I love you. Don't ever be afraid to let them shine through, past the walls you built to protect yourself from more hurt, more pain. Your true colours, you, Ziva are beautiful, like a rainbow in the sky.
Show me a smile, Ziva. Don't be so sad. I can't remember the last time I saw you laughing. If the world makes you crazy, if the darkness is threatening to overtake your very soul, call me, Ziva, you know I will be there. I will always be there.
I do see it, sweeting. I have worn a mask too long sometimes to let it show, but then so have you. I see the little girl you used to be. I see you kicking a ball down a dusty street with friends. I see the longing in your eyes, I see the pain down deep inside. I can see the pain of rejection, the desperation of neglect. the wariness of abuse. I see the child hanging upside down from a tree, the girl tugging on Mama's pants for a hug.
Let it all show, Ziva. If only once, my sweet, scream it out for the world to hear. If only once, kick a ball in the park running it down to score a goal. If only once climb to the top of a tree and hang from the branches.
So, my sad eyed little dove, don't be discouraged now. Realise that I love you, Ziva. I love you for what I see in you, not for what you allow the world to see. I love you more than you can imagine.
Tony
Reading it over, he slipped it inside the envelope and walked to the door of his apartment. Glancing around once, he walked out and down to his car. A heavy hand reached for his keys and turned them into the ignition.
He was afraid. More than he would like to admit. What if she scoffed at him. What if she withdrew further, what if she left. He had always believed that what ifs would stop the world. If you allowed your fears to run your life nothing would ever happen. The thought of her leaving tore at his very soul though. He could not go through that again. Never the less, he must trust her. Trust that she also, would trust him.
Before he knew it he was at her building waiting in his car. Glancing up at the night sky he walked in the door and up the steps. First floor, second, third. Fourth floor, apartment 57. He knew the number like it was his own. Hesitating for a moment, he reached into his coat pocket and withdrew the envelope. Placing it gently on ground he knocked on the door, waited to hear her coming and left. He would wait, he knew he would. He would wait in his car, wait for her to read it, wait to see what she did. For her he would wait forever.