NOTES: This is my head!canon for what happens immediately after The Wedding of River Song. I'm just a sucker for River/Rory bonding time, okay? As always, thanks so much to Charina for the beta and first review. Thanks for reading!
Rory entered his home to sounds of faint screams of joy emanating from the backyard. He placed his bag on the hook and made his way through the flat. Upon seeing his wife and daughter dancing outside, curiosity had fully consumed him. "What's going on?" he asked walking into the back yard.
Amy flung herself into his arms, her words rushing into his ear. "He faked it. He's still alive! He didn't die!"
Rory looked into River's smiling eyes. There was no need for Rory to ask who "he" was; that horrid day on the bank of Lake Silencio would forever be burned into their family's memory. He desperately wanted to believe his wife, but he was achingly familiar with Rule One. "Are you sure, River? Are you really, properly sure?"
"Of course I'm sure," she replied with her usual sly grin. "I'm his wife."
"And I'm his… mother-in-law."
"Father dear, I think Mummy might need another drink."
"Right," Rory mumbled, mind racing. His left hand reached for one of the wine glasses on the table when a thought crossed his mind. "Wait, how much have you had?"
Amy shook off her current thoughts and closed her eyes; a common habit Rory knew when she wanted to concentrate. "Umm, a couple of sips."
He nodded and handed her the glass. "You can finish the glass but that's it."
"Rory, I just had to admit that I'm his mother-in-law," she whined, emphasizing each of the last four syllables.
"That is true, but this is time travel we're talking about, especially if their wedding happened like you said it did and is constantly occurring. That means you have always been the Doctor's mother-in-law, and always will be. You can drown your sorrows about that fact some other time. Besides, after this confirmation, I think I might end up drinking enough for the both of us tonight."
Amy scowled. "You never let me have any fun."
"No, I only let you have the maximum amount of safe fun."
"Same thing," she muttered as she sank back down in her chair.
Rory gently pulled Amy back up, took her seat, and pulled her down to sit on his lap as River took her chair back. Amy quickly finished off her glass, so Rory took it and refilled it for himself while River caught them up with memories from her side of the Byzantium adventures.
"Oh, I remember that night." Rory said with a shake of his head.
"But you weren't there." River replied with a questioning tone.
"He's referring to what happened after the Doctor and I got back after that particular adventure." Amy explained. "Not that she needs to know about that," she ordered with a warning look on her face.
"Know about what?" River asked now intrigued.
"How your mother came on to your husband." Rory answered before letting out a quick yelp of pain as his wife elbowed him in the ribs. The bruise he might have in the morning was worth hearing the boisterous laughter bubbling from River.
"I told you not to tell her about that," Amy exclaimed.
"Oh, Mother, I already knew about it." River said patting Amy's hand.
"He told you about that?" Amy asked horrified.
River shrugged as she answered. "He may have told me that he was grateful that I didn't kiss like my mother once."
Rory gave in to his automatic reaction of cringing upon hearing something innocent yet utterly inappropriate that the Doctor said. Amy's reaction differed greatly.
"He said what? I am not a bad kisser. Rory, tell her I'm a good kisser," she complained while reaching out for the bottle of wine.
Rory stretched out and snatched it from her. "I think we'll add the fact that you're asking me to convince our daughter that you're an excellent snogger—which you are—to the list of reasons why you do not need to drink anymore."
"I am excellent." Amy pouted to herself.
River smiled at the display. "Dad, how did you fit into the picture that night?"
"The Doctor came to tell me about what happened."
"Oh, well that was respectable of him."
"At my stag party."
River's face froze at his response and only increased slightly in horror as Rory continued.
"He popped out of a cake and announced too all of my mates that she was a good snog."
"See?" Amy commented proudly, even though the rest of her family wasn't paying attention.
"I'm almost afraid to ask, but what was he wearing."
Rory shook his head quickly at the possibilities of that question. "Thankfully, his tweed."
"Only his tweed?" River asked with a sparkle in her eye.
Rory moaned in disgust at both the comment and the sensation of Amy perking up in his arms. "Have some stories about that, yeah?" Amy asked with a sly look on her face showing where River inherited most of her mischievous genes.
"I'd rather be erased from the universe again than have this conversation," Rory grumbled causing the girls to laugh at his obvious discomfort. "What is wrong with you?" He asked Amy. "That's your son-in-law you're trying to get intimate details about."
Amy shrugged. "Just trying to have a little mother-daughter bonding time."
"Well, do it when I'm not around please," he pleaded.
"Oh, fine," Amy grumbled. "There you go ruining all our fun again."
"It's a difficult job, but someone has to do it." He responded before kissing her forehead.
They sat for two more hours trading stories back and forth of their adventures, telling different sides of the same events. Amy eventually fell asleep in Rory's arms. He gently pulled his jacket that she was wearing tightly around her. River must have noted the concerned expression on his face. "Has she not been sleeping well?"
Rory shook his head. "Not for the last few weeks. Ever since that aborted timeline came and went, she's been having nightmares about Kovarian. Well, new nightmares about her."
"She told me a bit about it earlier. She's upset about what killing Kovarian makes her."
Rory felt the familiar grip on his chest and bitter taste in his mouth. It always crept up on him whenever he witnessed Amy or himself being changed for the worse because of something relating to the Doctor.
River shrugged. "It was an aborted timeline, what does it matter?"
Rory opened his mouth to retort, but quickly closed it. Sadness washed over him as he looked over his beloved daughter. His daughter that was stolen, raised by someone else, raised by utterly vile beings, raised to be an assassin, raised by people who fully intended on breaking down every bit of humanity she possessed in order to rebuild her as a machine of death.
"I would've killed her." The words should have surprised him as he said them, or at least the ease with which the fell off his tongue. "But I don't remember it happening, and Amy tells me I didn't have a clue who I was or what our actual life was like there."
He felt Amy stir slightly in his arms and regretted saying something so harsh with her nearby, even if she wasn't conscious. He wrapped his arms tighter around her and stood. "I'm going to put her to bed, if you don't mind. It's getting a bit cold out here."
"Of course not," River answered as she stood. She moved ahead of Rory and opened the door into the house for him.
"Thank you," he said while easing sideways into the home. "Now sit on the couch and don't you dare sneak off or I'll ground you for life."
"I'm already serving twelve consecutive life sentences, Father dearest," she argued even though she moved to follow his request.
"And you break out all the time."
She shrugged in response.
He shook his head and moved up the stairs to the master bedroom. Gently, he laid Amy down on the bed and removed his coat and her shoes. Deciding that was all he wanted to risk without waking her, he covered her with a blanket and removed his own shoes before heading back down stairs where he sank down on the couch next to River with a sigh.
"Long day?" she asked.
He nodded as he ran his hands over his face. "Double shift, but thankfully I have tomorrow off." He looked over at her with a raised eyebrow asking the unspoken question.
"Well, I suppose the Clerics won't notice if I spend the day here tomorrow if I time my return correctly."
"Great," he said with a smile. "And Amy won't be too mad at me then when we stay up all night talking again while she sleeps if you stay. You can go shopping or something together."
"Sounds like a plan."
"Well if that's the case, then I should've been drinking coffee instead of wine this evening. Want a cup?" he asked as he rose and headed into the kitchen.
"I'd love one," she answered as she followed.
He smiled to himself as she headed for the refrigerator. "I don't know what leftovers are in there, I've had a busy week."
She shrugged as she pulled out a cardboard box. "If I can't have your cooking, then I can settle for stealing Mum's leftover pizza."
"I can whip up something if you want."
She shook her head and waved him off as she started in on the first slice.
Rory usually tried to have some of her favorites, or at least the ingredients to make them, on hand at all times, but had been extremely busy working at the hospital he and Amy founded using the money from her Petrichor perfume line.
But now whenever River came to the house, she and Amy would split a bottle and have their girl chat. And when Amy drifted off to sleep, Rory and River would have their time together. It usually always included the kitchen since River hated prison food and always fought a constant craving for her father's cooking. Amy rarely cooked at home. She blamed the Doctor for giving her an inferior culinary complex at a young age.
He felt his shoulders drop at the ease the he'd finally established with his daughter. He didn't know how to treat her when she announced to them on Demon's Run that she was Melody. But eventually a deep friendship had developed. And now that the Ponds had left the TARDIS, new traditions and habits were being established. The Doctor had set up both their cell phones with a direct line to the TARDIS and Stormcage, and he and Amy both made sure to check in with their daughter and son-in-law at least once a week. Of course it always made Rory slightly uneasy when he could kill two birds with one stone and speak to both of them whenever he called the TARDIS. At least before the alternative timeline had kicked in and the Doctor died.
No, Rory thought shaking his head, faked his death. A sigh snuck out of him as he once remembered the news. Knowing that the women in his life would be hurting less always made him feel better about the world. And, even though they'd butted heads in the end of their travels, Rory was glad his mate was okay. For now, anyway.
Once the coffee was finished brewing and River had her fill of pizza, the two made their way back to the couch. Rory sank down first, propped his feet up on the table, and stretched his arms along the back of the sofa. River looked down at him and shook her head with a smile before settling in next to him.
"What?" Rory asked.
"Just thinking about that time when you had that monstrous growth spurt around sixteen or so. You spent all summer constantly breaking things and tripping. How many times did you fall into the duck pond?"
Rory rolled his eyes. "It's not fair to have your daughter grow up with you. They're not supposed to see you when you're all uncontrollable limbs and make fun of you for it."
River laughed and then snuggled in next to him.
Rory wrapped his left arm around her shoulders and placed a kiss on the top of her head. "How are you?"
River shrugged. "I think I might actually earn my pardon this time."
"I certainly hope so," Rory answered. "But that's not what's bugging you. Spill."
River pulled her head up from his shoulder and shot a look at him. "How did you know?"
Rory smiled slightly, proud to have bested his daughter. "You have a tell. Amazingly, you had it when you were Mels, too. You must've inherited it from your mother, because she does the same thing."
"What is it?"
He shook his head. "Like I'd tell you. It's one of the few recognizable warning signs I have with the two of you. No, I don't think I'll share."
River moved back to his side with a huff. She began to pick at an invisible spot of dirt on her camo pants before answering. "I'm seeing less and less of him. And every time I do he's so bloody young."
Rory's mind flashed back to Florida being underground and being lookout with she poked around investigating. And for the first time his mind took him down a dark and sickening path. He couldn't imagine the Doctor ever not being around River. He'd been there her whole life popping in and out. If he stopped bouncing into her time stream, was it because it ceased to exist?
Ice settled into his stomach. He pulled River closer to him. "It's going to be fine. I'm sure it will all work out." As he said the words, he wasn't sure if they were directed at her or himself as comfort.
They both sat there for a moment thinking unpleasant things before River reached forward and grabbed their coffee mugs from the table. As she passed Rory his, she asked, "So, when were you planning on telling me that I'm going to be a big sister?"
Being snapped out of dark thoughts, her question, and the newly placed mug of coffee in his hands, it was a miracle he didn't spill the hot liquid on his lap. "Figured that one out, did you?"
"Signs were pretty obvious if you know what to look for. And I've already met them."
Rory's head jerked up at her. "You have?"
"Several times," she answered with her patented I-know-something-you-don't smile.
"Wait, them? There's more than one?"
"No," she shook her head. "Only one. Just trying to keep the spoilers to myself."
"Please," he begged, "just give me one thing."
River tilted her head to the side as she tried to pick which piece of information of to divulge. "It's a girl."
"A girl," he breathed as a grin spread across his face. "Thank goodness. I'd be rubbish at raising a boy."
"Oh, you'd be brilliant," she reassured as she nested back in beside him.
"No, I wouldn't. I spent my entire childhood with you and your mum. I don't know the first thing about raising a boy."
"Maybe not, but you certainly know a thing or two about how to be a good man."
He felt his face grow warm at the compliment. "Thank you." An errant thought crossed his mind and he felt his breath catch in his chest. "River, I'm going to need you to do something for me."
"What is it?" she asked, concern evident in her voice.
"I need you to tell me the specifics of Timelord marriages."
"I thought you said earlier that you'd rather be erased from the universe again."
"No, not that part. I need you to tell me that they don't have something like sister wives. Who are, you know, actual sisters." River laughed uncontrollably at the idea. "I don't appreciate that response. And keep it quiet before you wake Amy."
"Sorry," she laughed before calming herself but unable to keep a giant grin off of her face. "No, I don't think you have to worry about that one. Just the normal lot of teenage boys who will inevitably be beating down the door."
"Weird to think the word 'normal' could ever be applied to our lives. Speaking of which, out of curiosity have you and the Doctor gone and made me a grandfather before I hit my late-twenties?"
He watched the sparkle immediately leave River's eyes and the corners of her mouth twitch down into a frown. "No," she answered quietly before going back to picking at the invisible spot of dirt on her pants.
He felt his chest tighten at the look on her face. Rarely did she show emotion around him and Amy for fear of giving too much away about their futures. What little that was bleeding through spoke volumes. He wrapped his arm tighter around her shoulders. "River…"
"It's ok," she said with a shrug. "Guess it just wasn't meant to be."
"You don't know that. Surely there's something you could try, someone you could talk to."
She shook her head. "Tried that. Lots of trying actually, which you've already mentioned you don't want to hear about. We even went back to see the Sisters of the Infinite Schism. I just don't have enough Timelord DNA in me to make it compatible. Besides, can you imagine me a mother? I wouldn't have the slightest idea of what to do. And on top of that I have to mother the Doctor so often, it'd be like having two children running around. Sometimes it takes all my energy just to make sure he doesn't go and do himself harm in the name of fun and adventure. I'm sure it's all for the best."
"River, you would be an amazing mother if for no other reason than you have excelled at every single other thing you've put your mind to." He pulled her against him and kissed the top of her head before resting his cheek on her curls. He saw her try to surreptitiously wipe a tear or two from her eyes and felt wetness seeping through his shirt. He thought about adding more words of reassurance, but they were yet to be on that level of familiarity with each other. He settle for holding her tight and silently willing that whatever was troubling her—absences from an increasingly younger doctor, wear and tear from Cleric missions, loneliness from being cooped up in Stormcage, a lack of a child to call her own—would soon ease.