Under the Tracks

Memories banished his good thoughts of his friends and it made him want to splinter the ground beneath him. He had loved his father at one time, before… before he was bitten. His father had been the devil to him afterwards and the real thing that pissed him off the most was the fact that his mother never talked to Remus the same way, never held him the same way and never looked at him the same way, it almost felt like every time she had held him close, it was forced. His father had died that night, but his mother… Remus knew that his face resembled too much of his father's and it bothered his mother dearly. It destroyed Remus.

There is a place

There has a face

And he was walking out the door.

Remus heard the fighting downstairs, but as much as he tried to ignore, it just wouldn't shut up and go away. He closed his eyes tightly, making the tears harder to break from his eyes. He hated it when his father would run off, but he mostly hated the muffled anger downstairs. Remus never knew what they were fighting about anymore.

'Don't leave, Dad, please don't leave…' Almost instantly, he heard the door slam and heard his mother's soft sobbing. Remus closed his eyes tighter than before as he heard her climb the stairs, talking to herself in a lifeless tone. He heard her feet stop at his door and his eyes loosened instantly, but when he looked at the door, instead of seeing a sad-faced mother putting her hand to mouth to stop her sobbing from getting louder for him to hear, he saw a monster standing in her place, holding a knife up, threateningly watching him. His eyes instantly closed and he heard her soft feet move alongside to his bed. Remus felt the weight on his bed shift near his feet as it sunk. He felt her body hover over him and he felt her hand sweep through his hair while soft sobs echoed off the walls in his room. Her lips touched his head and before he had a chance to open his eyes, the weight shifted underneath the bed as she walked out of the room, closing it only a little.

Remus listened to his mother sob harder in the bathroom, but he felt weighted to his bed, like his feet wouldn't respond and he was commanding them in his head to move, that he was going to find his father and make him apologize.

It took until his mother moved from the bathroom to her room that he started to move. Remus knew where his father went and he slipped his slippers and robe on as he silently went towards the back door in the kitchen where he knew that his mother and father had fought in before he left. As he passed through, he noticed everything was in order, as it always was, but the only thing that was out of place was the bottle of gin on the counter. Before he made his way out of the door, he took the bottle and set it up on top of the refrigerator where he had always known it to be set before the fights would begin.

Remus was walking towards the barn which was set about three hundred yards away from the house. It was a walk and he was eager to walk it.

The barn was closer than it normally felt and as he reached it, he heard muffled voices, one that was deep and unfamiliar and another that sounded closely related to his father, but scared. It was something different for Remus to hear and he was eager to hear the words that were being said. The moon cast a shadow of Remus as he leaned toward a peephole that he had made once to watch his father when he didn't want to do his chores. Remus could hear the voices words vaguely.

"I said pay up or you'll face the consequences we talked about!" the deep voice barked at Remus' father. The shaky and pleading voice of Remus' father scared Remus deeply as he responded, "I-I-I'll pay you back, I swear! I just n-n-need a lit-lit-little more time! No, no! Please!"

"I said this month or you'll get to feel the pain! One month too many I've waited!" Remus heard a growl and a scream. He looked into the peephole but something was standing in the way of it; he couldn't see anything, but he could hear a lot of commotion and then all was silent.

Remus stayed in his place at first, but then moved towards the barn entrance. The door was slightly open and he looked in. He saw nothing at first but then he saw something light brown and hairy hovering, grunting, and eating something. Remus' eyes got wide and he whispered under his breath, " Father." The object turned him, cold, dark beady eyes staring at him, snarling and if Remus had known any better, it looked like a dog smiling.

Remus made no sound as he turned abruptly and started to run back to his house. He heard the sound of breaking wood and fell almost instantly, a searing pain hitting him.

His mother said

She was ashamed

Cause he had no place to go.

He awoke in a cold sweat sometime. Looking around the room, Remus realized that he was in his bed with his whole body in searing pain, mostly it came from somewhere on his left. He sank into his pillow with a cry and suddenly all his senses heightened as he heard talking downstairs. Remus could hear the voices perfectly, but somehow, he knew that they were whispering. Soon, there were loud footsteps (two, maybe three pairs of feet) climbing the steps and opening the door to his room. "Remus…" He knew the name was said in a whispery sob, but it sounded so loud.

"Son, where does it hurt?" At first the deep voice was loud, but then his ears adjusted to the level of the sound and how it affected him and it soften. Remus cried in pain as he felt a hard jib somewhere on his left side. "Stop poking me!" he shouted. His body ached and felt like he wanted to rip something into a gory manner.

"Son, no one is poking you." He could hear his mother's familiar sob, but he didn't correspond to any of it. He wanted everything to stop so he could get up and walk away. Instead he went into a black pit where he could only hear his name being screamed by his mother's voice.

He was afraid

And I was fine,

And he wanted, peace of mind.

Remus' mind never shut up. He lazily sat up in his bed, smothering his head in his hands. All the noises around him electrified to a loud pulse; he needed to move away from the city. It was past midnight and though people say that cities are more quite at night, he thought it was actually louder at night. His ears would strain to hear something and so he would be forced to wake up and listen to the night sounds; oh how agitating!

He instantly got out of bed, putting muggle clothes on. Remus grabbed the keys to his apartment and left, almost running out the door. If he couldn't sleep, he mine as well wane himself to a dull roar.

Remus found himself at the park, thinking of his dream. It frightened him to have to listen and watch the sounds of his past, but he almost instantly found comfort, as he smelled a familiar scent: Lily. She always smelled of sweet, almost like the taste of a perfectly ripened cherry. Remus found himself walking towards it, seeing the body in the bench. Her red mane didn't turn, but stayed in the same position. He sat down next to her. "Hello Lily, what makes the Virgin Mary walk at this time of night?" he smiled cheerfully as he turned to look at her, but something was wrong. He turned his head to look at her and almost instantly he stood, bile and fear eating at his throat. Lily's head was twisted and about and her eyes bulged, red tears trailing down her face.

Sitting up in a pile of cold sweat, Remus panted. He hated his nightmares. Why wouldn't he have peace of mind?

Authour's Note: Hello again all! This story wasn't on my list of stories I was going to write, but sadly, I have been having trouble writing most of them and Cinder-Mione is being put on a hold. this is another song fandom but this one is a Remus/Lily contrabution. I've always wondered about this match, but I won't spoil the ending ; ) Some of you will be upset with me and others may say, "Good ridance!" It may be a happy ending to some and to other's it may be a devistating ending. So all I shall say is enjoy!