A/N: After months of working on this, the fic is finally done. This is a continuation to "In And Out Of Love". It's recommended that you read that fic before you read this one although I can guarantee you that this fic is a vast improvement (even though I do like IAOOL"). Please note that the warnings in this fic would be: mention of suicide of a minor character, mentions of underage sex. If you like this, please review and rec it. Also, I have a Tumblr where it's the easiest to reach me, I'd be honored if you can follow me at "rykerstrom . tumblr . com". Thanks and enjoy!
THE TRUTH BENEATH THE ROSE
Sebastian watched silently as Blaine spoke on the phone with Cooper on a Sunday afternoon. He had actually come to hate Sundays lately. The new client project Blaine had been assigned to was on the other side of the States, which meant that his boyfriend would have to fly out on a Sunday evening rather than the typical Monday morning. It was hard enough not seeing Blaine everyday, but now Sebastian was pretty much only left with only late Friday nights and Saturday to spend time with his boyfriend.
And as selfish as it might sound right now, he really wished that Blaine would get off the phone with his brother.
The problem with Cooper, aside from his annoying arrogance, was the fact that he just wouldn't stop talking. Every time Blaine got on the phone with Cooper, Sebastian could count on at least one hour gone from the day. What was worse was that most of the time, it was Blaine doing the listening while Cooper rambled on about his life on the other side.
Soundlessly, Sebastian walked to the sofa and sat down behind his boyfriend. He wrapped his arm around that slim waist that he loved so much and started to press small kisses along the back of Blaine's neck. If Cooper wasn't going to shut up, then Sebastian's going to make sure that brother of Blaine's hear what he was doing to Blaine while they were on the phone.
"Coop, so you oh—" Blaine squirmed when Sebastian's hand dipped under Blaine's shirt and moved up the length of his torso. Blaine's free hand tugged at Sebastian's wrist gently, signaling Sebastian to stop. Instead of stopping, Sebastian slipped his other hand inside the waist band of Blaine's pants while he traced the shell of Blaine's ear with his tongue. "I—oh—Damn it. Hang on! Quit it!"
There was a frown on Blaine's face, even though Sebastian could tell that his boyfriend was slightly flushed. He leaned forward to press a kiss to Blaine's lips but Blaine shook his head and pointed at the phone. Resisting the urge to sigh, Sebastian settled into his sofa and grabbed his laptop.
"Cooper? You still there? Oh, okay. So how was Kelly?" Sebastian overheard. If he remembered correctly, Kelly was Cooper's girlfriend. "Oh, I'm sorry. That really sucks. Hm? What do you mean? You what?"
Sebastian looked up in curiosity. There was a strain in the way Blaine was speaking now. It was a tension that Sebastian had become familiar with after all these years. Blaine only sounded that way if he was upset or angry.
"But this whole time—Uh-huh. I see." Blaine bit his lip. "Hey, Coop? Coop! Sorry, but I have a flight to catch today. Yeah. Sorry. Yeah, okay. Right. Take care. Bye!"
Blaine put his cell phone on the kitchen counter. He remained seated at the stool as he rubbed his temples in circular motions.
"What's wrong? Your flight's not till this evening." Something in the last five minutes Blaine had gotten rather upset and Sebastian was pretty sure it wasn't because of him.
"Nothing. I'm fine." Blaine sighed as he stared off to space. "I need to finish packing anyway."
"Blaine." Sebastian put his hands on Blaine's shoulders and massaged gently. "It's never nothing for you. What happened?"
Sebastian could sense Blaine hesitating. Whatever it was that was eating Blaine, it must be something unexpected.
"You wouldn't understand," Blaine said quietly, there was a tinge of resignation in his voice.
"Try me."
Blaine turned around so that they were almost at eye level.
"Coop cheated."
"Cheated? In an audition?"
"No, Sebastian. He cheated on a test." Blaine's tone was clipped. "He cheated with another person."
"Oh."
"He's been dating this girl for months." Blaine shook his head. "He just told me today that they broke up because she was married!"
"I see." Sebastian tried to keep his voice neutral. He knew where this was going.
"Coop dated a married woman, for months!" Blaine threw his hands up in the air. "I—I can't believe this. I don't care if he brags about his auditions, I don't care if he steals the spotlight, and I don't care if he is being a douche. I'm fine with all that. But he cheated, Sebastian! He violated the sanctity of marriage, of someone's ever after!"
"I get it, Blaine."
"How can you be so calm about this?"
"I—" Sebastian paused. He was in dangerous waters at this point. He knew Blaine, with his sense of honor and integrity would not take something like cheating lightly. "I'm just trying to understand all perspectives first."
"There're no other perspectives. Sebastian, Coop cheated and that was that." Blaine sighed. "I—I can't continue the conversation with him after that. I feel awful but I know I'd get mad if I stay on the line."
"I know."
"I don't want to be judgmental but this—this is disappointing." Blaine turned his head away, his shoulders slumped the way they normally would when he was feeling discouraged.
"What else do you know about this? Has he told you anything else?"
"I told him I had to go before he could get another word in." Blaine clenched and unclenched his hands. "I feel like such an awful brother but I just can't. I mean, he cheated!"
"You should really get his side of the story."
"Why are you defending him? You're never a fan of his, why now?" There was an edge to Blaine's voice, an indication that his boyfriend was losing his patience. "There's no other story."
"I'm not defending him." Sebastian argued. "I'm just saying things are never this simple."
"I should've known that you of all people wouldn't understand."
"What the hell was that supposed to mean? Are you suggesting that I condone cheating?"
Blaine pressed his lips in a thin line. "So what if maybe I am?"
"Excuse me?" Sebastian felt as though he had been punched in the guts. That hurt. "In case you haven't noticed, we've been monogamous for years and I sure as hell hadn't cheated on you!"
"Well, why are you so calm about the Cooper thing, if you like not cheating so much?" Blaine shot back, a hint of challenge evident in his tone.
"Of course, Blaine Anderson is the perfect picture of a saint who has never done a single thing wrong in the course of relationship." Sebastian seethed.
"What the hell?" Blaine's face turned red in a matter of seconds. "That's pretty low. Don't change the subject and drag me into your twisted argument."
"Says the person who thinks he is qualified to judge others on their actions." Sebastian could feel the tone of mockery in his words, but he was too put off to care. "Who died and made you the authority on cheating? Should I start calling you Saint Anderson now?"
"This is different. That girl's married!" Blaine snapped. "Does the meaning of forever or ever after mean anything to you? Till death do us part?"
"Well, according to you, apparently I don't know." Sebastian seethed. "What other pearls of wisdom is the oh-perfect-one going to bestow on me today? Hm?"
"Stop being such an ass, Sebastian!" Blaine's voice rose in anger. "This isn't about us. This isn't about you!"
"Funny how you go back on your words so quickly. You just accused me of condoning cheating and now you're twisting my words and say that I'm making this about myself?" Sebastian let out a disappointed laugh. "And yes, Blaine. Keep yelling at me, I'm sure it's a real effective way to get the answers you want. I'm told it works for children all the time."
"I'm an immature child?" Blaine's fists were clenched, his back stiff. "At least I don't support homewreckers! Funny how you keep defending Cooper, considering you don't even like him!"
"For the n-th time, I'm not defending your annoying brother." Sebastian could feel his own blood pressure rising. "You are exasperating. You always think you're right even when you're wrong."
"Destroying people's marriage is wrong! You know what? Forget it. I know you'd never understand." Blaine was shouting now. "You've probably done this enough times before I met you that you probably think all forms cheating are the same."
Sebastian could feel all the blood draining from his face. If Blaine's previous accusation of Sebastian condoning infidelity made Sebastian felt like he had been punched in the gut, this comment made Sebastian felt like his heart had been ripped into shreds.
Blaine's hand flew up over his mouth when he realized what he had said aloud.
"You know what? Fuck this, Blaine. Whatever." Sebastian put up his hands and took a step back, keeping some distance between him and his boyfriend. This was bringing back something that he hadn't allowed himself to think about for years. Sebastian took a deep breath and tried to keep his voice level. "Coop's your brother, I'll just let you guys work it out between yourselves. I'm sure Saint Anderson knows best."
Blaine was about to say something but Sebastian continued.
"Now if you'd excuse me, I'm going have to be a grown-up and go shop for food." He started toward the door and grabbed keys off the counter. "I'll see you in two weeks."
Sebastian knew he had to get out of the apartment, because if he had stayed there any longer in Blaine's presence, Blaine would've seen through the cracks in his façade.
Sebastian didn't return to their apartment until late that night. By then, Blaine had already left for the airport. There was a text message from Blaine, telling him that he was about to take off. Sebastian texted back half-heartedly and wished him a safe journey. He knew he was being distant, but it couldn't be helped.
Blaine's implied accusations had somehow stirred up memories that Sebastian would rather lay dormant forever.
Sebastian Smythe didn't do regrets. At least he told himself he didn't. Life had always been about learning from one's mistakes and moving on. What happened was a mistake, but he was young and naïve at the time. He wanted to believe in fairytales, and he wasn't afraid to go for it, even if it meant lying about things just a little bit.
It had been almost eight years. Sebastian thought he had put it all behind him when he came to Ohio, but apparently not. Because if he had, then it wouldn't felt as though his heart was being ripped out all over again, would he?
He stared at the flight schedule that was displayed before him. The ticket was expensive, but he had enough money saved up for it. He could afford to get away for a week. Sebastian knew he needed to do this, that after all these years, it was time for a closure that he never had.
Entering in his credit card information, Sebastian hit "submit" and bought the ticket to Paris.
It was time to revisit his past.
It had been years since Sebastian had set foot in Paris. He had made a point to avoid the city at all cost, and that if he must transit through Paris in any manner, he would stay within the confines of airport lounges. It was silly, but anything that could prevent him from going into the city itself was worth trying.
Paris hadn't changed all that much. It was still beautiful, lively, and vibrant. The way people dressed might have changed slightly, but it was still the same city after all. Paris was the place that had served as Sebastian Smythe's home for a number of years. It was also the place where many memories were made.
Paris was the place where he met his first love; it was also the place where he ultimately lost his first love.
The cemetery was not far from the city. It was one of those beautifully landscaped places that afforded a good view of Paris. Sebastian had often found it absurd that people would spend a fortune to be buried in places like this one. After all, once one was dead, it would be impossible to appreciate the beautiful scenery anyway.
It was his first time to this cemetery, but the place wasn't hard to find. It wasn't difficult to find the tombstone either. Sebastian had done research prior to coming to Paris. As he walked up the small hill, he came before a moderate size marble tombstone.
Jean-Paul Moreau
Feb 3rd 1988 – April 15th 2011
Père aimant et fils adoré
Loving father and beloved son. It was simple, and in a way, melancholy. Jean wasn't just a father, he was someone's husband at one point.
Jean. A name that Sebastian hadn't even allowed himself to speak aloud for years.
"Hi there." It felt odd to be talking to a grave, but Sebastian didn't care. He needed to say it. "It's been a while, hasn't it? I know, I've grown even taller."
Sebastian crouched down so that he was at eye level with the grave. He placed a bouquet of roses on the grass and sat down.
"I was told that your son's doing well, and that Cecile has remarried. Don't worry, I don't think she knows who I am. I'll always just be the nameless, faceless person that her husband cheated on her with."
A sense of anger flared up in Sebastian then. It was as though he was reliving that moment again. The moment when Jean told him that he was married with a son.
"Conventional courtesy would dictate that I apologize for taking this long to come see you, but I'm not sorry. The truth is, I want to put this behind me. That day at the café when you finally came clean and told me everything, did you know that my whole world shattered right then and there?" Sebastian let out a bitter laugh. "For God's sake, I was only fifteen! I know, I told you I was eighteen, and I really didn't know any better. I was in love, and I thought that was enough."
Sebastian took a shuddered breath to steady himself. It was like reliving his past all over again.
"I didn't think you'd go kill yourself though. You have no idea what that did to me. My world ended. I was hurt, angry, and terrified. I never got to say goodbye, and I never got to confront you and ask you why. Why me? Why did you do all this?
"Do you know that I gave up on love after what happened? I thought that love was an illusion, that there's no such thing as a real relationship. I thought all I was good for was to destroy other people's relationships. I thought I was doing people a favor to break them up. I mean, I was helping them cut their losses. Better to end a relationship early if it wasn't going to work out, right? It obviously didn't work out for us."
Sebastian ran his fingers over the inscription, tracing the indentations for a moment before he continued.
"For the longest time, that was what I thought. I was so fucked up. You had no idea what I was doing to myself and to other people. My parents thought I was acting out because some boy dumped me. Yeah, I couldn't even talk to my parents because God knows how worried they'd be if they had known the truth. It was hard. It was impossible."
Sebastian closed his eyes for a moment and took a deep breath before continuing.
"You know, all these years, I still couldn't bring myself to say your name? Because I knew the moment I said it, I'd have to accept all of these had happened. Well Jean, that day's long overdue. Do you know why I'm not afraid of accepting this anymore? Because of Blaine."
At the mention of that name, Sebastian opened his eyes and smiled.
"Blaine saved me, in more ways than one. He is the most amazing person I've ever met. He never takes, and only gives. He was the one who restored my faith in humanity again. You two are nothing alike.
"You're probably wondering why I'm here today. It's pretty simple, actually. I want to say to you what I haven't been able to say before. And I want to give these back to you."
Sebastian reached into his pocket and pulled out an envelope. He opened it and two things fell out.
"Remember this? It's the ticket stub to the Opera House when we celebrated my fifteenth birthday. Of course, you thought I was eighteen at the time. I guess I did a pretty convincing job of looking more mature than I was." Sebastian studied the ticket stub briefly, noting how even after all these years, the print hadn't quite faded. "Yeah, I kept it, the silly romantic that I was. I couldn't believe just how madly in love I was with you back then. For the longest time I actually thought that was the best night of my life."
Sebastian closed his eyes briefly at the memories. He still remembered the candles, the smell of roses, and the way the shadows played on the fixtures of the hotel room at the very moment Jean took him. But the memory felt different now, it felt stale and broken. In its place, there was a different memory, a much better one. It still had the roses and candles, but the other person with Sebastian this time was Blaine. Blaine, who taught him that all was not lost. Sebastian smiled a bit at that as his mind lingered on the new memory before he glanced down at the remaining item in his hand.
"And the pocket watch. You left that behind one time. You never asked me for it, because I'm pretty sure you didn't even know it was missing. I've kept that with me like it was the Holy Grail. I'm returning that too."
Putting the two items back into the envelope, Sebastian sealed it up and placed it next to the roses.
"This is the first time I've visited you, and it's also the last time. I'm closing this chapter of my life for good." Sebastian stood up and pulled his trench coat tight around him. "And now, I have to catch my flight. Someone very important to me is waiting for me back home."
With those words, Sebastian turned and walked away from the grave, never once looking back.
Insomnia was not something that Sebastian ever had to deal with, at least not up until last week. They rarely fought about anything, and even if they did, it was never like this. There had been a few text messages being exchanged the past week, but checking to see whether each other was safe and sound was nothing like the affectionate messages that Sebastian had grown fond of over the years. It was driving Sebastian crazy to not be able to get things resolved with Blaine.
He missed Blaine. Greatly. More than anything. And right now, there was nowhere Sebastian rather be than at home with Blaine.
It was a restless flight back to America. It was pure torture, to be so exhausted but yet be unable to fall asleep. Putting his passport into the pocket of his coat, Sebastian made a mental note to make Blaine an extravagant dinner when his boyfriend came back from business trip. They would talk things out. They always did in the end.
As the cab pulled up to their apartment, Sebastian was surprised to see the lights in their unit to be on. He knew he had set the timer, but it wasn't supposed to be on at this hour. That could only mean one thing.
Blaine was home. He was home early, and Blaine never came back from a business trip early.
Sebastian scarcely had time to close the door behind him when he found himself being pushed against the door with an armful of Blaine.
"Jesus! Blaine what are yo—" Blaine kissed him hard, his fingers fisting into Sebastian's shirt. There was an urgency behind the kiss, almost as though Blaine was afraid that he would disappear if he let go.
"Where the hell did you go?" Blaine demanded when he finally pulled away, face flushed and breathing uneven. "I was worried sick! I came home last night and you weren't here! And what's with the luggage?"
"Well I—" Sebastian closed his eyes and took a deep breath. When he opened his eyes again, he could see that Blaine was waiting for an answer. "I went away for a while."
"You could've left me a message."
"Look, I'm sorry I didn't tell you."
"I thought something happened to you!" Blaine's voice was brittle, but he sounded calmer.
"Can you—would you just sit down?" Sebastian gestured to the sofa. "I think we need to talk. I want to talk to you."
For a few moments, Blaine just stared at Sebastian, his expression unreadable. Then, without another word, he turned and sat down on the sofa.
Sebastian rolled his carryon luggage to the wall and sat down next to Blaine. He breathed an inward sigh of relief when his boyfriend took his hand and linked them together.
This was the moment of truth. Blaine deserved to know, especially given how long they had been together. "I went to Paris when you were gone."
"Paris?" The expression on Blaine's face was a mixture of surprise, confusion, and worry. "Did something happen? Are you okay?"
"No, I'm okay. I need you to know that—" Sebastian took a deep breath and tried again. There was no subtle way to ease into this. "I'm about to tell you something that not even my parents know. I just ask that you listen to what I have to say." And don't judge me. Sebastian added silently.
"Okay." Blaine definitely looked concerned.
"I never told you why I moved to Ohio." Sebastian tried to focus his attention on the coffee table in front of him. "I wanted a fresh start after what happened with Jean. That's, well, that was my first boyfriend."
When Blaine didn't say anything, Sebastian continued.
"I met him when I was fourteen at my parents' networking function. He was in his early twenties at the time but I told him I was seventeen."
Sebastian studied Blaine's reaction carefully, only to find that Blaine had schooled his expression into that of neutrality. It was strange, to be telling this to someone for the first time. Blaine was quiet for the most part though he did notice Blaine's eyes darkening angrily when Sebastian mentioned he was fifteen when he slept with Jean, and how Blaine couldn't help stuttering his shock over Jean's suicide.
"I was blindly in love with him. I was so blind that I never saw—I mean I didn't want to see the warning signs." Sebastian concluded. "If I had known he was married with a child—well, I should've known better."
Blaine opened his mouth and closed it after a few seconds, as though deciding what to say.
"You don't have to say anything." Sebastian gave Blaine a small smile. Surprisingly enough, it actually didn't hurt to talk about it. "It's in the past."
Sebastian felt Blaine giving his hands a comforting squeeze.
"I went to Paris to visit his grave. I never had a chance to ask him why or confront all this." Sebastian admitted. "But I'm done. After eight years, it's time to move on."
"Do you still love him?" There was an uncertainty in Blaine's voice.
"No, I stopped feeling anything for him by the time we got together." Sebastian pulled Blaine toward him and held him. "You saved me, you know that? If you hadn't come along, I would've destroyed myself long ago."
"Don't say that." Blaine looked up. There was a bit of wetness in those eyes. "I'm really sorry I said what I said. It was unfair to you."
"You didn't know, I should've told you. For that, I'm also sorry. Not to mention I've said some mean things to you as well."
"You have nothing to apologize for." Blaine reached up and stroke Sebastian's face. "I feel terrible about this."
"I'm fine, especially now that I got you." Sebastian gave Blaine a small smile, hoping that his boyfriend would understand that he would really like to put all this behind him.
"I hate it when we fight." Blaine murmured as he buried his face in the crook of Sebastian's neck. "I'm so sorry."
"Stop apologizing." Sebastian's heart clenched painfully at how upset Blaine sounded. "Blaine, I think we sh—"
Blaine cut him off with a series of kisses.
"Don't speak now." Blaine pressed another kiss to Sebastian's lips. "I just—I just really miss you."
Sebastian understood Blaine enough by now to know that if his boyfriend was upset about something, there was no point in getting anything through to him until he had gotten it out of his system. Besides, the past week apart had felt like an eternity. And at this moment, there was nothing Sebastian wanted more than to be with Blaine.
"Come with me?" The look in Blaine's eyes told Sebastian that he felt the same way.
"All right."
Sebastian let himself be led into the bedroom and pushed onto the bed. He pulled his shirt up and over his shoulders and dropped it onto the floor next to the bed. He was about to undo his belt when Blaine placed his hand over Sebastian's.
"Let me." Blaine's voice was soft, his amber eyes dark. "Just lay down."
Sebastian nodded and watched silently as Blaine rid them of their clothes. Their bedroom was almost completely dark saved for the night light and a few rays of light that spilled in from the crack under the door. Nonetheless, it was enough light for Sebastian to see Blaine clearly. It was a surreal atmosphere. This was different from all the other times they had been together. There was an aura of intensity and urgency surrounding what they were doing this time.
Blaine's touches were feather light. Sebastian bit back a moan when he felt fingers brushing over his nipples. Blaine was kissing him everywhere, his neck, his mouth, his chest, and his abdomen. It was unusual for Blaine to take an active role, but Blaine seemed determined. Whatever it was that was eating away at Blaine, Sebastian knew that the best remedy was to let Blaine do as he pleased. He knew that Blaine would never hurt him.
Sebastian arched up and off the bed when Blaine took him into his mouth. It was hot, wet, and fucking Hell incredible. It wasn't that Blaine hadn't given him a blowjob before, but it was the way that Blaine was looking at him as he bobbed his head up and down on his cock. Sebastian gripped the sheets beneath him tightly as he tried not to buck up into that heat, but Blaine was making it impossible as he hollowed his cheeks and swirled his tongue around the tip.
"Jesus fucking Christ!" His fingers tangled in Blaine's hair as he fucked into Blaine's mouth. In his haze, Sebastian thought he heard Blaine made a noise when he pulled a little too hard. Untangling his fingers from Blaine's curls, Sebastian settled for fisting his hands into the bed sheets. But almost too soon, Blaine was pulling off.
Laying down on top of the pillows, Sebastian tried to catch his breath as he watched Blaine reached for the bedside drawer through hooded eyes. The sound of the drawer closing shut sounded strangely intrusive in the quiet room, but the minor distraction was soon forgotten as Sebastian watched Blaine prepared himself. It was mesmerizing, seeing his boyfriend reaching inside of himself, the muscles on his legs and abdomen straining taut as he tried to adjust and relax against the intruding fingers. There was a light layer of sweat coating Blaine's skin, giving it a surreal golden glow under the dim nightlight.
"Beautiful." Sebastian said aloud, and their eyes met.
Blaine surged forward and their lips met in a series of tongues and teeth. It just didn't seem enough, it was never enough. When Blaine finally pulled way, he placed his hands flat against Sebastian's chest and slowly lowered himself onto Sebastian's cock. It took almost all of Sebastian's self-restraint to not slam up into Blaine right away. Blaine always felt so incredible around him; it was almost as though Blaine was made for this, made to take in Sebastian and fit against him neatly like they were built to be one.
Sebastian reached up to caress Blaine's face. His cheeks were flushed red, his lips slightly parted, and his brows furrowed in lines of concentration. When Blaine opened his eyes again, he held his gaze and watched Sebastian as he raise himself up slowly before plunging down again.
It was amazing, exquisite, and mind-blowing all at once. And it was so Blaine.
Gripping Blaine's hips, Sebastian thrust up as Blaine lowered himself onto him. They established a rhythm as they met thrust for thrust, grinding against each other, needing, searching, and consuming. Sebastian pulled Blaine flushed against him so that they were skin to skin. In this position, their movement was more restricted, but Sebastian didn't care. He just wanted to feel all of Blaine right now, to feel the closeness and the connection. Blaine kissed Sebastian hard, his tongue slipping past Sebastian's lips and they tasted each other.
"I love you." Blaine murmured against his lips, and Sebastian swallowed those words and took them into his heart. He knew that Blaine meant every word of it, and that there were no deceptions or illusions behind them. "I love you so much."
Wrapping his arms tightly around Blaine's waist, Sebastian rolled them over so that he was on top again. He interlaced his fingers with Blaine's as he pounded into the boy below him, savoring the gasps and the moans that he was drawing out of Blaine, knowing that those words of adoration and declarations of love were meant only for him and no one else.
Crushing his lips to Blaine's, Sebastian swallowed Blaine's cry as he came. He kept his lips on Blaine's and kissed him repeatedly even as Sebastian picked up the speed of his thrusts. When Sebastian climaxed, all he could see were exploding stars and fireworks.
They laid together in silence afterwards, the sound of their breathing filled the otherwise quiet room. Sebastian was about to pull out when Blaine grabbed his wrist.
"Stay in there." Blaine's voice was soft with a bit of rawness around the edges. "Just for a little longer."
"Okay." Sebastian kissed the side of Blaine's face tenderly. Blaine turned his head so that he could meet those kisses. "I—um, I didn't mean to worry you, going off to Paris like that. I didn't know you were going to be back early."
"No, it's fine. I just panicked." Blaine was carding his fingers through Sebastian's hair. Sebastian sighed in contentment as he felt the fingers massaging his scalp. "I'm the one who should be apologizing. I know I already did, but it doesn't make up for any of this. I feel awful for what I said before I left. It was uncalled for, presumptuous and judg—"
"Blaine, can I just say something?" Sebastian pulled out gently and laid down next to Blaine. If they were going to talk, he preferred laying down side by side or in each other's arms rather than in the awkward position of being on top of Blaine.
"Of course." Blaine looked apologetic. "God, I feel like I haven't been giving you enough chances to talk lately."
"That's not what I meant." Sebastian paused as he contemplated what to say. "I told you about myself for two reasons. One, because you deserve to know; and two, I want to tell you that things are never that clear-cut."
"And I appreciate that." Blaine brushed a stray strand of hair away from Sebastian's forehead. The gesture was oddly comforting. "I plan on giving Coop a call tomorrow. I should've been there for him, and not judge him."
"He's lucky to have you as a brother."
"I'm far from perfect, as demonstrated by recent and past events." Blaine said wryly. It was clear to Sebastian that Blaine was still feeling guilty.
"No, I can understand where you came from, especially given my track record. It's just that this one hit a bit close to home." Sebastian was rarely self-deprecating, but this was one of those rare occasions because he knew it was painfully true. "I'm not proud of my past, and I need you to know that those days are long over."
"You don't have to tell me that, Sebastian. I trust you." Blaine gave him a dazzling smile. "You're not a bad person. You're smart, handsome, witty, and amazing. But most importantly, you have a beautiful soul. Don't ever think otherwise; and don't ever let anyone else tell you otherwise."
Sebastian felt his breath caught in his chest. Outside of his immediate family, Sebastian Smythe was someone who was hated by many and for good reasons. He had been called a lot of things in his life, but they were rarely things that he would like to repeat. Yet here he was, being told that he had a beautiful soul by none other than Blaine Anderson himself. Fuck what others said, this was what counted.
"I love you." Sebastian murmured against Blaine's lips. These were not words he uttered often, but if there was one thing that he was certain about his life, it was that he loved Blaine more than anything in this world. "I really fucking love you."
Blaine laughed softly, the sound melodious to Sebastian's ears. Blaine pressed his lips to Sebastian's and gave him a long, deep kiss.
"I know, Sebastian. I know."
Sebastian Smythe's first love might have ended in betrayal, but it was all in the past. There was a bright future ahead with Blaine Anderson waiting for him, and that was all that mattered.
(END)
Addendum: There you have it. I hope you enjoyed the continuation of "In And Out Of Love". I just feel that Sebastian needs to get his closure and that Blaine needs to knw about Sebastian's past. If you have any questions or would like to chat with me, please follow me on my Tumblr at "rykerstrom . tumblr . com". Thanks again.