Forgiven, an avatar: last airbender fanfic

Warning:Some scenes or words depicted in this story are for mature readers only, and might offend some people who are not generally attuned to such topics. Please read at your own risk. This is an explicit work and it will contain adult oriented material.

Synopsis: Zuko helps Katara set out to find the man who murdered her mother and avenge her death. But at the last moment, Katara finds that she could not do it, and that violence is not the key, but forgiveness. My somewhat belated offering for Zutara Week 2015, takes place during episode 16 of Book 3: The Southern Raiders. (one shot - Zuko x Katara)

Also, let's just pretend they're both somewhere between 18 and over at the time that this story takes place. ;)

The small fire crackled in the dark as Katara and Zuko settled in for the night. It had been raining since early that afternoon, and all they could find for shelter was a small cave, big enough to just about fit them and Appa together. It was a far cry from the shelter provided by the Western Air Temple, but it was enough for the night. The bison had since placed himself on the far end, where a small cavern leads into the base of the mountain, while the two benders settled closer to the mouth of the cave.

It had been a draining day for Katara. She had not slept for days since she began this fateful journey with the crown prince of the Fire Nation. She could feel the fatigue begin to bite, but sleep still seems to evade her. Her mind was still in inexplicable torment as the events of the day played through her head.

"Whoever you are, take my money. Take whatever you want. I'll cooperate!" cried the man.

Katara looked into the man's eyes; those same eyes that haunted her for years of sleepless nights. She had expected to see a monster; terrible, ruthless and evil. She had expected to see eyes filled to the brim with fire and hate, as she had seen them many years before. She had gathered more than enough strength to face that monster, and she had finally gotten her wish. And yet there in front of her sat a pathetic old man, shivering in the cold rain, half-rotten and drenched vegetables scattered around him. Fear had replaced the fire that burned in those eyes, now pleading for mercy.

As Katara revealed herself to the man, she asked, "Do you know who I am?"

"No. I'm not sure," came his befuddled answer. Trembling with rage Katara shouted, "Oh, you better remember me like your life depends on it! Why don't you take a closer look?"

Realization gripped the man and his eyes widened as he remembered his past crime. Desperation now clung to him as he begged for mercy, offering to balance her loss by giving his mother's life to her. No longer wishing to speak Katara bends the raindrops to from daggers to cut him down. The man shields his face with his arm as the daggers fly towards him, waiting for the inevitable. But nothing comes.

Only rain.

Katara clenched her eyes, the rage in her body overwhelming her once more. She could not understand why she could not do it at the last moment. It would've been so simple, and she would have served justice where justice was wanting. Her breath hitched as tears began to fall from her eyes. Biting down on her fist, she tried to muffle her cries. She couldn't afford to let Zuko see her so vulnerable. She turned to look at him to see if he'd heard her, only to see the older boy already looking at her.

"What?" she sniffed.

"You don't have to feel ashamed for crying," he said, his eyes intensely gazing at her.

"I'm not crying!" she exclaimed. "I just… I'm just… cold right now".

Zuko smiled, letting the matter drop. It was a rare thing to see him genuinely smile. There was a warmth to it that seemed ill placed. She had only ever really seen him being so dour and cold, or burning with rage. He was actually quite handsome despite his hideous scar. "C'mon. Sit here by the fire," he invited.

Katara walked towards the fire and began to feel the warmth it offered her. She immediately felt her body loosen as she let the heat fill her body. "Have some of these," Zuko said, offering her a whole grilled fish. "You have to eat something and rest. We've been travelling for days now and I haven't seen you take anything at all."

Katara took the offer and nodded a sign of thanks. The smell of the grilled fish was not at all appetizing. But as she took her first bite, she had almost forgotten all inhibitions. Her hunger suddenly became all the more apparent as she finished it off in a few minutes.

The corner of Zuko's mouth crooked into a smile again. He offered her another which she gladly took, but this time ate slowly with a little bit more dignity. Looking back into the fire, Zuko remembered the times he had been chasing the Avatar and his friends. A year back he wouldn't ever have imagined being with one of them trying to help find a murderer and dispense justice, let alone the share a meal together. Indeed it had been a long winding journey for Prince Zuko, who had by now learned to appreciate the irony of it all. Fate had dealt him a strange hand, and all he could do was play along. And yet he couldn't help but feel that he was finally on the right path. He felt that someday, he would rise above himself, and help the Avatar end the war his family began a hundred years ago. He finally had a chance at redemption, and he would tread the path one step at a time. He only wished his uncle could've been there to share that moment with him.

But Katara was there, and strangely, it felt rather familiar and intimate. Zuko didn't mind the silence. It gave them both room to think. And as he looked over to the Water-tribe girl, she seemed to be well within the depths of her own mind.

"Thank you," said Katara all of a sudden, taking Zuko aback. Her deep azure eyes were fixed on the fire, looking into an unknown distance from within the flames. "I guess… I guess none of this could've happened without you."

Realizing what she meant, Zuko said, "It was nothing. Don't think about it too much."

"No, you don't understand," she said, her voice cracking as if she were about to fall into tears. "You've helped me more than you can imagine." There was another long silence before she continued. "All these years have been hard on me—hard on us, my brother and I. This war… has taken so much."

"I know," said Zuko.

"No, you don't know!" snapped Katara, her eyes blazing as they met Zuko's. "You don't know what it's been like for us. We used to be happy. We were a family! We lived so far away from this war, I just can't understand why. Why did they have to take her away? She'd done nothing wrong. Why couldn't you people just leave us alone?" She finally broke, and all the tears fell freely from her eyes, which she had obviously been holding back. Hiding her face between her arms, Katara could no longer hold back and wept. Zuko stared at her, not knowing what to say or how to feel. He had never been snapped at as vigorously as when Katara did it. But he couldn't feel angry in any way for it either. He understood that she needed this, and that to her mind, he was the embodiment of all the wrongs his country did to her and her people. He felt the weight it held over him, but stood to bear it nevertheless. He needed to atone for many things, and perhaps in some ways, he needed to atone for her.

Zuko shuffled away from her and on to the other side of the fire. He waited for her to settle and calm down on her own. She did so after a long while saying, "I'm sorry. I didn't mean any of that."

"No, I do understand," said Zuko quietly. "At Ba Sing Se, everything I told you was true. I never meant to hurt you or Aang or anyone else. I was blinded by the thought that if I could just take the Avatar, I would finally have my chance at redemption. But that proved me wrong too. All I found was pain and guilt and anger. I know what it's like to feel that loss. This war has taken a lot from me as well. I've lost my mother too."

Katara was silent, wiping away at her tears as he continued to speak. "My mother was banished," he said, "she tried to protect me from my father, and for that she was sent away. My father, whose sole reason for being is to become the ruler that his forefathers could never be, did all he could to make my life miserable. I didn't know it at the time, but he did. I thought I was doing everything wrong and that I had to do all I can to prove myself to him. I never doubted that he loved me, but I guess I was wrong about that too. He relished every moment that I had to suffer, up to including my own banishment. Since then I thought that if I could restore my honor, he would treat me as the son I always was to him."

Another long silence ensued, disrupted only by the crackling fire and Appa's rumbling breathing as the bison tried to sleep. The rain outside softened but continued to pour down the slopes of the mountain. Hearing all this made Katara ponder how she would've acted around Zuko had she known these things before. She realized that her pride had prevented her from listening to reason, and perhaps find empathy for the young man who had thus far proven his intentions to be true. She had never before considered this thoughtfully, and felt a lump in her throat at that.

"For so long, all I've ever felt I needed to do was to hold on," said Zuko suddenly. "That everything hung on a thread for me, and I held onto it. Each time I failed at capturing the Avatar, the thread grew smaller and smaller. When Azula came to Ba Sing Se and offered me more than I could ever dream of, I had to choose between restoring my honor or forever fade into obscurity." Zuko chuckled as he began to reminisce. "I guess I chose poorly, and for that I'll always be sorry."

Katara saw in Zuko a kind of sadness that she had only ever known in herself. She had tried to bury it deep within her and find meaning in her life with her brother. When they found Aang, she suddenly found an even greater purpose by becoming a guide to the Avatar's journey towards his destiny. Looking back at what she had experienced with Zuko, she realized that she wasn't all that different from the Fire Prince. They both found hope in something, and sought to preserve it, even when at times it seemed as if it never really made sense. It was more than enough to make them both long for the promises life provides.

"We should get some sleep," Zuko finally said. "It'll be dark soon. Once this rain peters out, we can move out and get back with the others." Katara nodded silently and began to lay down her sleeping bag closer by the fire. Zuko moved away towards Appa and sat down, his back against the sleeping bison. Katara stared once more into the fire and let the day's events draw out once more. The monster's—no, the man's—name was Yon Rha. He had murdered Kya in the false belief that she had been the last of the waterbenders of the South. And when Katara stood before him demonstrating his mistake, she had thought that vengeance would be easy and that the rewards would satisfy a blood lust she did not after all posses. Nevertheless, she found nothing in her that could forgive Yon Rha and his crimes. But perhaps she could forgive the one person that for the most part had embodied all the anger and rage that lived inside her for the past year of her life.

Katara woke from a dreamless sleep. The fire beside her had become embers in the last hour. Rubbing her eyes, she looked around her, trying to remember where she had been. The pitter-patter of the rain against the ground and the canopy outside indicated that it had slowed down. As she slowly rose she caught a sight of Zuko lying on his side, facing towards Appa. He was shivering. He had nothing to cover himself with in the cold, and despite being filled with the element of Fire within him, he seemed helpless in his sleep. Katara soon realized that she had in fact had one too many sheets covering her body, and realized that he must have placed it on her when she was asleep.

Stupid, thought Katara. He didn't have to do that. But still she was touched by the selflessness behind it. She had grown to realize that the Son of the Fire Lord had more to offer than she expected. He wasn't at all the snob that she imagined that he would be, being a Royal and all. Zuko was kinder and gentler than most of his country men have been to the peoples of the world. In fact, he was indeed kinder and gentler than he was ready to admit to himself. Katara felt her face grow warmer for some reason.

Slowly, she ruffled the sheets together and walked towards Zuko, who had his hand for a pillow as he slept. She took the sheets and covered him and herself together. She figured they could share the warmth of their bodies along with the sheets. Suddenly she found herself ill placed so close to the young fire bender. But it worked. Zuko seemed to welcome the warmth she afforded him with those sheets. Katara once again lost herself in her thoughts as she stared up into the cave's roof. Zuko had proven himself to her that day. He had been passionate in his efforts to help her, and when they found Yon Rha in his miserable retirement, he stepped aside to let her choose her own destiny. More than anything he had been there to guide her the way Aang had tried before they set out on this mission. And like Aang, Zuko had unwittingly shown her that there was more to her life than a thirst for vengeance.

The rain began to strengthen outside once more, with the wind whipping up the trees that rustle together as they bent to its will. Katara nuzzled herself against Zuko's back out of impulse. Before realizing what she'd done, the boy had turned himself around to face her. She gave a gasp, covering her mouth as she did so only to realize that he was still asleep. Heart pounding, Katara slowly calmed herself down. She didn't know why she felt so apprehensive all of a sudden, but she did anyway. As she began to catch her breath, she finally took notice of the young man's face before her. He was indeed handsome, as Royals had often been depicted so. Save for his scar and bags that formed underneath his eyes, his face exuded a soulfulness, with great power underlying it all. His rather thin lips seemed fuller and more relaxed in his sleep, now that it didn't serve the purpose of scowling, which Zuko often did. Katara couldn't control herself when she suddenly let her fingers line the edge of his face. His hair fell messily down onto his forehead, covering his eyes somewhat, and Katara moved them away so that she could observe him even closer. It was the closest she had gotten to touching his scar since Ba Sing Se, when she offered him to heal it with her spirit water. Luckily she hadn't done so at the time, which ultimately saved Aang from the coils of death. Still, she wondered just how well it would've helped heal Zuko if she still had some to use on him now.

Her hand found rest on his cheek, still somewhat visible under the dying ember glow that the fire afforded them. He was chilly to her touch, but after a while under the sheets, began to warm up and she could feel her heart pound as she held him so. Suddenly, her hand was caught off guard by his. Eyes widening in surprise, she found his grip very firm, but not forceful. Even in the dark she could feel his gold eyes look at her intently, as if asking "What are you doing?" But he didn't speak. Katara calmly took her hand and cupped his face, warming his cheek with her touch. She had met his gaze and found in them a kind of longing she associated with hunger. Slowly her hand traveled down from his face, then his neck, his navel and then his chest, resting on his heart, which beat steadily underneath his tunic.

"I was just wondering," stammered Katara, "if you were alright." Zuko again didn't speak. His eyes still intent into seeing through her. She found them looking straight into her own and beyond, as if seeing something into an unknown distance. For the life of Zuko though, he was surprised either way at the look of concern she offered him.

Zuko took her hand once more into his, and placed it onto his cheek, breathing in her scent. Katara was more surprised at how she was accepting all this than with what the boy was actually doing. And soon she felt the tickling sensation of kisses on her palm, then her wrist. She gasp as she felt something inexplicable surge in her body. It seemed to crawl up from behind her and into her spine, settling around her neck, and she found herself unable to resist the feeling. Soon she was pressing her body closer to his, while he came to hold her tighter next to him.

Looking into each other's eyes they saw only desire. It was strange to see each other in such a different light in so short a time. But even stranger so, was the ease with which all the mess of the past seem to slowly melt behind them. As Katara's fingers lined his lips, Zuko pulled her into a kiss.

It was not the first kiss that both of them had ever had in their lives. They have shared such a moment with others. But it began rather awkwardly as if it were. They explored each other as the sensation of having their bodies so close began to dawn on them. The thought of Katara as anything more than an ally never crossed Zuko's mind until that moment, when the thought of her naked in the dark sparked more than just fire in him. Katara meanwhile already had her hands fiddling about the hem of his tunic.

Zuko didn't take long to feel the strain between his legs, as Katara's hand felt around his stomach, just above his trousers. Gasping at the touch, Zuko tried to speak, before delicate fingers stopped him from doing so. He looked again into the girl's eyes which seemed to beckon him, "Don't question it."

What little uncertainty he felt soon melted away, as this time Katara moved in to kiss him. Her hand had by now reached under his trousers, fingers now holding at his erect member. He in turn reached in under her shirt, his hand kneading her breast from under it. She began to make small rhythmic strokes with her one hand while she undid the fasten on his trousers, freeing his fully erect member from under its prison. Tearing away at her clothes, Zuko buried his face into the crook of her neck, breathing in her hair while his hand traveled down the curve of her body. Their breaths began to deepen as they reached for the other's lips once more.

Now both fully naked, their clothes serving as supplementary sheets, Zuko reached down into her center, his fingers lightly touching the warm wet mound between her legs. She moaned in approval as he slowly slid a digit in, and then two more. Her hips buckled at the each touch, as slowly his fingers dug deeper inside her. She had never been touched like this by another person. And for the first time in her life she was feeling pleasure from the ministrations of someone beyond herself. It scared her to think about such things before, and yet there she was in the midst of passion, coming to realize what the rest of the world seemed to know all along. Zuko turned over, laying her down on her back, kissing her once again, this time with a bit more force.

Katara found herself wanting when he pulled away from her. She was befuddled at his sudden hesitation, seen through his eyes. They looked once more into her, as if asking for permission, and with that Katara smiled. Don't question it! she almost said. Zuko gave a small grin as if hearing her thoughts and laid himself down on her.

He entered her, slowly. And the shock and awe in Katara's face almost made him stop. He felt sorry for the pain that he was now deliberately causing her, but as he tried to pull away, he felt both her legs cross over him, as if forcing him to continue. Her fingers dug into his skin as he slowly forced himself through, until finally he had reached his zenith and rested there.

He looked into her face as if asking if she were alright, and she nodded to him with a crooked smile. The loss of her virginity didn't even bother her so much as it bothered her that he wasn't going further. And as if reading her thoughts, he began to move back just as slowly, his shaft slick with her wetness. He stopped at just about the point before he was fully outside and began to shove inside her again. Her breath sharpened at each stroke, and soon he began to get a rhythm between their bodies. For his life, he could not believe how amazing it all felt.

Having had spent so much time with Mai, it was inevitable that they would eventually cross the threshold of their intimacy and share a bed together. His first time with Mai was just as awkward, perhaps even more so. But as time went by he had gotten the hang of it with her, and had picked up a few things to make the experience more rewarding for the both of them. But right now was different. Katara seemed more vulnerable where Mai seemed so strong. And in that vulnerability, he saw his own self doubt, and had found a reason to want more from what he was getting. He found that his own vulnerability augmented hers, and that there was comfort there that offered more.

Instinctively, Katara spread her legs wider as Zuko began to quicken his pace. She cupped his face once more between her hands, savoring the pleasure mixed with the pain that was building up between her legs. She could feel his full length stretch the tight muscles inside her, and she grimaced at the feeling of being so filled. Sure enough the pain ebbed away, and in its place pleasure held its course. Zuko suddenly pulled himself out of her, and in her confusion was surprised when he turned her over to her side. He placed himself behind her in a fetal embrace, while he held her leg up and placed it on top of his, his hard cock teasing her entrance as he did so. Katara found his hand in hers, and their fingers intertwined as he entered her once more. For some reason, it felt as if he was reaching deeper into her, hitting all the right spots each time his hip met hers. She turned her head over to her, feeling the warmth of his breath against her skin before kissing him again.

Their steady cadence seemed to become like a dance, almost as if they were bending the elements between them. Fire subdued by water, water subdued by fire. Reaching once again between the lips of her entrance, Zuko's fingers found her spot, while still pounding into her. Katara's moans began to grow louder, her face contorted in the overwhelming pleasure it gave her. Zuko turned her around again and pulled her closer before sitting up. It didn't take long for Katara to know what to do, before moving her hips down on to Zuko's, impaling herself onto his throbbing member. They shared another kiss, her teeth digging into his lower lip, muffling her small cries as they moved into one another with greater force. Pushing down onto her body, Zuko placed her right back down onto the sheets, quickening his pace as he sensed that he was getting closer to completion. Katara was beginning to mumble things into his ear as her fingers dug into his back.

It didn't take long before Zuko heard Katara gave a wail of delight as she felt herself orgasm. Zuko followed suit, his pumping becoming harder and harder, until the last moment, before pulling himself out and spilling his seed onto her stomach. It was an oddly sensational feeling, she thought as she felt the warm fluid spill onto her skin. Zuko fell right next to her, their breaths heaving from the effort it took to finish each other off.

Katara turned to face Zuko, his scar clearly showing as he stared up above the cave roof. Absentmindedly, she drew herself closer to him, nuzzling her face close to his neck, the smell of sweat and sex permeating between them. Zuko's arm stretched from under her and took her into a tight embrace. No words were spoken between them in the moments that followed suit, only the warmth that seemed to envelop them in comforts of their own embrace.

Just before the break of dawn, Zuko and Katara set off to return to camp. Side by side on Appa, they quietly enjoyed the view of the clear skies that had washed itself clean of the dreariness of yesterday. The sun brightly burnished the seas below them, and it seemed as if the world was stunning in the peace and beauty that Nature bestowed on it. There was an unspoken peace between the two of them as well, as if the turmoil of the past year had washed away along with the rains. Zuko relished in the warmth of Katara's arm around him while Katara rested her head on his shoulder, eyes closed as if asleep.

When they arrived, Katara strode off onto the docks, somehow still disturbed by what had happened thus far. She still felt that the Fire Nation's debts are legion, and that an accounting of its crimes are yet to unfold. She still felt unease at the fact that she had let Yon Rha go, but torn about what could've happened had she actually killed him. She feared losing her soul over someone who never deserved a thought in any minute of any day. The war wasn't over yet, and Sozin's comet was a mere few days away. They all had so much to do and very little time to do it in. But for now, she had decided that she had achieved a lot already, and that it won't take that long to finally reach the end of this long dark chapter in the history of the world.

"Katara, are you okay?" Aang's voice rang along with his footsteps as he ran towards her at the boardwalk.

"I'm doing fine," she said rather half-heartedly.

"Zuko told me what you did," said Aang. "Or what you didn't do, I guess. I'm proud of you."

"I wanted to do it," said Katara. "I wanted to take out all my anger at him, but I couldn't. I don't know if it's because I'm too weak to do it or because I'm strong enough not to."

"You did the right thing,," answered Aang. "Forgiveness is the first step you have to take to begin healing."

Katara stood up to face them both. "But I didn't forgive him. I'll never forgive him." Walking up to Zuko, she smiled. The night before had been wonderful. But they both knew that they had to face different destinies. Katara still saw Aang in her life as the one thing that would not only restore balance to the world but to her life as well. Zuko would someday helm the nation that had brought so much pain and anguish to the world and lead it to the healing it so rightly needs. Holding his face to her hand, Katara said "But I am ready to forgive you." Taking the young prince into her arms, Katara held him close, as if to tell him that he will always hold a special place in her heart, and that what they shared together will always be in her memories. Zuko embraced her back, taking this as a sign of his inevitable redemption, and wanting most of all to see Katara at the end of it all, finally happy as she so deserved.

As Katara walked away, Zuko's gaze followed her. "You were right about what Katara needed," he told Aang. "Violence wasn't the answer."

"It never is," said Aang.

"Then I have a question for you," said Zuko before turning to face the Avatar. "What are you gonna do when you face my father?"

Aang was silent. It was a question he could still not answer. But it was all too clear for Zuko. Even so, he resolved to help guide the Avatar to his destiny, and with it, find his own.

~end~

Author's note: I'd like to apologize for any inconsistencies in detail that I may have overlooked during the writing of this piece. I wanted it to follow the canonical story of Season 3. I figured that there must have been a time lapse between scenes where Katara and Zuko face Yon Rha and return to the gang's camp that hadn't been shown on the episode, and which I thought I could fill in. If this doesn't at all seem plausible as a scenario, then I apologize. This is just a weak attempt on my part to write up my own fantasy about the series and how I felt it could've made more ground. Of course, I have to admit as well that I'm not actually a Zutara shipper, and that I actually prefer the canon. So if this doesn't feel authentic, please, do feel free to let me know in the reviews, and I will try to improve upon it next time. Till then, thanks for reading!