Give a Reason
A One-shot Seiya/Usagi
~The rush and bustle of time is overwhelming
The city it runs through is a savannah
Sure news of an ill change...
When tomorrow comes, everyone will forget.~
No one could forget. It wasn't that very long ago that the fate of the entire galaxy resting in the hands of a 4'11", 16 year old blonde haired, blue eyed girl in her first year of high school. Three other girls watched the battle with fear written all over their faces, especially showing in their eyes. They never took their gaze away from the blonde and the warrior she was fighting.
The battle deciding the fate of the universe, Sailormoon versus Sailorgalaxia.
Mercury, Mars, Jupiter, Venus, Uranus, Neptune, Pluto, Saturn, Chibichibi, Princess Kakyuu, Tuxedo Kamen - all had fallen due to their own attempts to fight Galaxia. Whether it was one on one, two on one, four on one, they all failed. What made this blonde believe she could defeat this soldier by herself, when so many behind her had fallen? The three watching her couldn't figure it out. Well, two of the three couldn't - one could. One with long raven hair and deep blue eyes.
Some said she confused the image of her Princess with this blonde. Others said the male persona got to her. Few said she was just crazy trying to separate this blonde from her fiancé. No one knew the truth but the blonde herself, but she was a tad slow at getting this. The words, 'I've fallen in love with you without even realizing it' didn't appear to be strong enough, at the end, even though her tears at the time made it seem so. The truth, actually, was that statement itself. This raven tailed girl had fallen in love with the blonde without even realizing it.
Was it the similarities between her and her own princess? Was it her bright eternal shine? Her power? The aura around her? No clue. But all that the raven haired girl knew was that she couldn't stop thinking about her, and the sight of this battle was getting to her. So many soldiers died right in front of her eyes, her Princess included. The blonde's starseed had been shattered earlier, and that was also too much to handle. Adding all the attacks sent at them.
The raven tailed girl's ally, the one with silver hair, attempted to attack this Galaxia earlier. Her attack flew back and hit the three of them. Two, three shots from Galaxia. From Uranus and Neptune. More from Galaxia. It was a wonder that they were not already dead.
~I'm living, I'm living right now
Searching for something in such a relationship
As if I were struggling, as if to slip away,
It want to try testing this power.~
Maybe it was the blonde's power and strength that helped them to hang on. It was weird, unclear, hard to figure out. Suddenly, after who knows how long, the blonde managed to take a hold of Galaxia's hand. Chaos was terminated out of Galaxia's body, the sky turned blue again. There were floating starseeds everywhere, surrounding the two long haired soldiers that floated in the sky.
The three leather clad soldiers stood up in the debris that they were in. It looked so much different now that there was light. Like.. Safer. More peaceful, like they no longer had to hide in fear. That was the case indeed, Galaxia disappeared and the starseeds followed her.
At this point the blonde was surrounded by her soldiers and her fiancé, and the three leather clad Senshi were face to face with their Princess again. But that was then and this was now. Returning home was the hardest thing this leather-clad girl could do. Of course she was happy, beyond happy, that she was back home with her allies and her Princess.
The clean-up work was only starting out but that was okay; that was the least of this girl's problems. Her main concern was that she screwed up, emotionally. Not exactly the last thing she said, but one of them, was 'I'll never forget you, Odango.' And that was a fact. But the girl was too dense to understand it. She didn't hold it against her, even though she was a tad slow at grasping some things, she still had a shine like no other.
Everyone noticed this girl's internal struggle with herself. She knew this Sailormoon would never have the same feelings, and her mind accepted it. Her heart, on the other hand, did not. Her heart longed just to hear her voice once again... Did she even truly fall in love with her? Well... Rumors were all over the planet already, about that exact question.
~Surely, somewhere lies "the answer,"
the answer to why I was born.
That is what all people wish for,
facing the dreary dream that they can't let go of.~
She didn't. She just confused the image of the Princess with Sailormoon and can't get out of it.' A Yaten-influenced rumor. 'She did. She's a lesbian or something. Geez.. Is this the leader of the warriors that are supposed to be heirs or whatever?' Mainly anti-Starlight people came up with that one. 'She is in love with her.' Non-anti-Starlight people believed that one. 'She's just...herself. The flirt she'll always be, only was hit head over heels with this one.' This one came from random people.
She didn't care what the rumors were. The holder of the true answer was herself. And that answer was a mix of all of them. At first she was just mixed up between their Princess and Sailormoon, but it later grew into a love that she didn't know was forming until moments before their final concert on Earth. Oh how it sucked to realize things when it's too late. If she realized sooner she could have forced herself to back away, but it was too late.
There was no time to change that. Her boyfriend was dead, she was depressed, her friends, the world, everything and everyone was dying... There was no choice but to protect her. And that simple action caused it to grow. Was it need? Want? Desire? She didn't even know herself. All she knew was that she was going in and out of depression stages and she couldn't stop it. By a late realization of her emotional state, she plummeted into a deep hole she couldn't crawl out of alone. Whether it be Yaten, Taiki or Kakyuu that had to pull her out, she didn't know.
Somewhere in the back of her mind she knew. None of them could. Only Tsukino Usagi, Sailormoon, could pull her out of the hole she was it. And she was off to be married to that man shortly, have a child. That dug a deeper hole than before.
~I'm not afraid of getting hurt, but I'm not strong at all.
It's just that I don't want to be regretful,
without doing anything at all
Here we go! go! I'll keep running!
I won't be stopped by anyone.
I want to give a reason for life to my future self.~
Could people actually be over-analyzing this situation? Maybe. But she was guilty of that, too. Every night and every morning she would start or end by wondering what she could have done to prevent herself from this state, what she could have done to win her heart.
Mamoru's cold stare sent at her flashed through her head, unable to remember the sympathetic look he gave her at the end. He couldn't be all bad…Usagi would have never chosen him if he was. But a part of this girl, a part of Seiya Kou, wanted to strangle him, 'why do you make her so sad?', scream, yell. But would that be right? Most likely not, but it would feel right as it was happening, if it were ever to.
Of course, Seiya would never do this, because she knew, deep inside, that it would hurt Usagi to do so. They had gone through so much already. But...would she even remember them, now?
The crescent moon is visible through an open window in the dark, night sky. Covers are twisted over a figure that peeks its head out from underneath and stares out forward, unable to move or speak, or say even too much.
"...unrequited love... After everything we've done why do we have to suffer so much?"
~The huge darkness that knows no scale
makes a sound and comes toward me.
If someone is with me when the morning is finished,
it would erase the desolation in my heart.~
Morning. Analyzations done. Seiya turned in her bed, pulling the covers up closer to her face. Her hair tie was rather loose so she had her hair all over her face and back. She couldn't get to bed till three in the morning, and for another she fell asleep in a weird position.
Taiki and Yaten had to come in after hearing a crash, which was just Seiya falling off the bed. That was around three thirty. They put her back in her bed and pulled the covers over her, going back to their rooms in annoyance and worry. This wasn't the first time Seiya had fallen off her bed rather hard but wouldn't wake up due to it.
The alarm went off as loud as it could possibly go. Seiya mumbled under her breath and pulled the covers over her head. Not good enough, she could still hear the alarm beeping right beside her. Too lazy to roll over, she pulled her pillow over her head, trying to drown out the annoying sound. it wouldn't go away. Growling in frustration, Seiya flung forward, her pillow in her hand. She raised her arm up into the air and swung down, the pillow hitting the clock dead on, causing it to crash into the floor and go silent.
Narrowed eyes stayed fixed on the silent clock before she grew satisfied and placed her pillow back under her head, as she closed her eyes again. As quickly as the beeping sound had gone away, Seiya slipped back into the world of dreams, not wanting to pull out of it. Maybe there was some meeting or something that morning, but it would have to go on without her, she was too drained. A bunch of images filled her head and flew out, illusions and visions and mere images of wishes and desires.
~I make a stronger image,
and my belief in myself as I smile comes
closer to my dream than anyone or anything.~
A dream... Seiya's eyes flew open slowly, as she felt herself drifting downwards slowly, nothing around her to grab a hold of to stop. Her arms reached up, hands scrambling for something to grab a hold of. It was weird... She was in her red pajamas still, her hair completely loose now. She started to fall downward at a faster pace, continuing to look for something to grab a hold of. Suddenly, a hand grabbed a hold of her own which was keeping her from falling any further. Seiya blinked, looking up. Her cheeks went bright red and eyes went wide open. One second ago she was contemplating her past actions, laying on her bed, now she was in the middle of nowhere, falling, and the one who saved her was none other than the one she could never ignore. Tsukino Usagi.
"Odango.. How did you.." Seiya shut up quickly once she felt Usagi's finger over her lips.
"This isn't real, Seiya."
"..yeah. I've come to realize that."
"Seiya.. You've got to know. I'm sorry for hurting you.."
"Hey.." Seiya smiled a bit, trying not to look down below her. "It's not your fault I'm in an unrequited love. You have your boyf—fiancé..."
"Seiya.." Usagi breathed, pulling the girl up so they were both face to face. "I am still sorry."
"You have no reason to be."
"Yes I do." The blonde pulled her closer, staring deep into her midnight blue eyes. "I never got to say thank you or anything..."
"You never had to."
"Seiyachan.. I don't want you to be sad anymore on my count. I want you to be happy." The blonde pulled her closer, holding her in a tight embrace. Seiya felt at a loss, confused and for some reason rather vulnerable. For once it was her that sought comfort in the other girl's arms.
'What is she getting at..?' Seiya blinked. "Odango.. What do you mean?"
"Live life like there's no tomorrow, Seiya-chan. I'm...." Seiya's eyes widened as she listened carefully, feeling the other girl's arms wrapped around her waist. This time, a different voice could be heard. Instead of the nice tone Usagi's had, this one had an annoyed one, a rather pissed off tone.
"SEIYA KOU GET UP OFF OF YOUR ASS AND COME DOWNSTAIRS!" Suddenly, Usagi's image disappeared and Seiya fell back downwards, her eyes glued on where Usagi once stood. Her body was frozen, she couldn't feel the nerve to even try to move this time. Her hair flew out, everything was getting weird, but Seiya still was staring upwards, trying to see if she could locate Usagi. ...Or the golden band around her finger she was just about to find out existed.
~I won't stop myself at one goal
because even if I reach it,
a new dream will surely push me even farther.~
Seiya turned, quickly falling off of her bed. She threw the covers off of her head, breathing deeply. She raised a hand to her face, wiping the tears off of her cheeks. The door opened, Yaten and Taiki standing on the other side.
"Seiya.. You just missed the meeting we were supposed to attend," Taiki whispered. "Are you alright?"
"I'm fine.." Seiya breathed, blinking in confusion.
"You don't look fine," Yaten mumbled, bending down next to her.
"Another dream with her?"
"Yeah..."
"Seiya.. when are you going to get over her?" Taiki bent down beside her as well.
"I think.. I don't think I'm supposed to. I think I'm supposed to remember Odango, and love her. But obviously everything and everyone is trying to tell me that she's not the one. Although I'm aware of this, I won't stop thinking about her."
~Here we go! go! I'll keep running!
I won't be stopped by anyone.
I want to give a reason for life to my future self.~
"Why won't you...?"
"Like our Princess, she gives me a reason to wake up in the morning sometimes. When I don't feel like it, mainly. I don't really think I'm making too much sense."
"When DO you?"
"ANYWAY. That dream didn't either. I think I get the point of it this time."
"Oh? What was it?" "She got married since we've been here. She doesn't want me to be upset over it anymore."
"So... After all this time of us telling you... You didn't get it. Some whacked out dream tells you and you get it?!"
"So are you finally going to be our normal Seiya again?"
~Surely, somewhere lies "the answer,"
the answer to why I was born.
That is what all people wish for,
facing the dreary dream that they can't let go of.~
"Yeah... I'm sorry you two." Seiya rubbed her forehead, smiling nervously.
She felt Yaten playfully slap her upside the head and Taiki put a hand on her shoulder. "It's okay. We'll always be here for you. Now, when you're properly dressed, come downstairs so you can explain your absence, okay?"
Seiya nodded as the two got up and walked out, closing the door behind them. She got up and tossed the covers back on the bed, sitting down beside the window. She pushed the curtains aside and looked to the sky, a small smile on her face.
'It's a new day. It's a new beginning. I'm not going to forget about you, ever, Odango. Because it's still a galaxy of difference... A one sided love."
~I'm not afraid getting hurt,
but I'm not strong at all.
It's just that I don't want to be regretful,
without doing anything at all.
Here we go! go! I'll keep running!
I won't be stopped by anyone.
I want to give a reason for life to my future self.~
