My first fanfic ever! I'm so excited please review! this is kind of like my life story for the first part except for the depression and bulimia and all names are fake. also it's kind of what i would like to of happened in the future when i was going through this cos let me tell you, it definately didnt happen like this!

I was always a happy child when I was little. I was fun-loving carefree and overall a very content little girl. But when I was six something tragic happened. It was like my whole world fell apart. My best friend, Elise Brine, died in a car crash and I was depressed. The worst thing was that no-one knew about her but me Demi Munroe. My family had no clue that she existed and my acting skills, that are now highly developed, helped me through the rough patch of my childhood by keeping my depression a secret.

But keeping a secret like that drove me even further into depression which spiralled me into being emo (emotionally unstable) and cutting anywhere on my body that would bleed. I was out of control and I needed help as much as I didn't want it, and of course I didn't get the help I needed.

It's now been three years since I started cutting and I'm still going. I'm doing dancing and piano now but none of my teachers know. The pressure is getting to me and I feel like I need to tell someone, like I need to pour my heart out and just tell the whole world about Elise and my depression issues and bulimia, which has also been added just recently to my list.

Since Elise's death I made a new best friend Lily who went through primary school with me from the first grade. It was great because we lived in the same street and all. But that friendship fell apart when we moved up to high school, she went to a different school. She made new 'better' friends and started ignoring me like I was a feather in the wind, forgotten. Of course I still had Tabitha and Nicola with me but Lily ignored them too.

Then came the worst part, her new friend Kayla, changed dance schools to ours and then Lily completely ignored me like I was some random who just happened to live in the same street and went to the same dance school who she didn't know or care for. And that hurt me, it hurt me a lot. It was the depression all over again and everything got worse. But no-one suspected a thing, I was just the happy little girl who was content all the time. Boy were they wrong.

Then things started to get tricky at school. I changed groups from Tabitha and Nicola because they were getting on my nerves about how much Lily hurt them and how I should feel sorry for them, little did they know. When I changed groups they got angry at me and telling me things like 'you should of told us' and 'why? Are we not good enough for you anymore?' I wanted to tell them about my issues but they wouldn't support me, they'd back away from me like I was some freak of nature. I had no idea what was wrong with me although i knew why i was doing it, which was really confusing. Though when i got my period everything was worse because it's really heavy and to make things worse i was moody and in pain for the 7 days it went for! It was frustrating and annoying but i couldnt help what i was doing. It took away the pressure of my live and how everyone expects me to be perfect and be happy all the time.

I started to be bad in class and i blew my top off at my bitch of a teacher Miss Luther. Let me explain...

(flash back)

I was walking back from the bathroom which i had stayed at for at least ten minutes cos i was being bad. When i got back the bell rung and my teacher was like jess stay back... and i was like oh god here it comes... then when everyone left she started yelling things like 'why'd you take so long?' , 'I thought you were a good girl?' and 'Why arent you happy and nice and being bad and acting like the 'cool' kids?' I got so annoyed at her for yelling at me and asuming so much about me that i blew my top and yelled...'why do you care its not like your my mum or anything? and maybe i dont wanna be this impecable girl whos happy and smart and so lovable and who everyone asumes has the best life and has no troubles... well you no what i have troubles and i get stressed like everyone else and i dont have the perfect life like everyone thinks so just BACK OFF! Ithen ran off crying and my teacher decided to leave me to myself. Smart choice miss smart choice.

(end of flash back)

so there you have it. Thats what happened when i blew my top at my teacher. Very emotional really. But on with the story.