OMG! My very first one-shot!

Nudge POV

I looked at Gazzy, who I had tied to a chair. He was struggling against the ropes but knot-tying is another one of my majorly awesome skills. He looked me in the eyes, like he had given up all hope. Good.

I pointed a wooden spoon at him. "Now you are going to tell me where the hidden stash of candy is now, or else."

"But Max said-"

"I don't care what Max said! You will tell me where the chocolate is hidden!"

Max poked her head in the door, earbuds to her iPod in. Looks like she wanted to know what the screaming was about. I just shrugged my shoulders. She looked momentarily at Gazzy, who opened his mouth to speak, but I shot daggers at him. Max shrugged and walked away, not even caring that Gazzy was tied up.

Yep, this is normal flock behavior.

I whacked Gazzy on the shoulder with my Spoon of Doom. And yep, you can believe it's capitalized. He yelped. "OW!"

"You were going to tell Max what was going on. Weren't you!" I said in my best good cop- bad cop voice. "Now where is my precious chocolate!"

"Under Max's bed there's a safe, type in 'password' as the password. I will say that is wrong. Then type in 'no! It's right!'. It will then open, holding pounds of goodies."

I squealed with delight. "Yay! Thanks Gazzy!"

After he ran out, terrified, I called Max in. I beat her down with the Spoon of Doom and ran into her room. I typed in the two combinations and the safe opened, showing tons of treats.

*****************10 minutes later******************

My tummy hurts! But that was so worth it! Oh God, I'm going to barf. I ran over to the tree and puked my guts out. After I brought my head up I got all dizzy and got the kaleidoscope vision. Everything was turning pretty colors.

I ran into the kitchen where Max was waking up, but Fang was doing the tango around her with Total and Total was trying to escape from his grip.

I looked outside and saw an elephant sniping us. "AAAHHH! ELEPHANT WITH A MACHINE GUN!" Iggy tried to stop me on my way out the door, but I socked him in the gut. He doubled over, coughing.

The elephant was flying over me down, aiming his new rifle down at me. It was seriously new though, with my raptor vision I could see he bought it for $99.99 at WalMart. I screamed again and dived into one of those gutter-drain-off-pipe-thingys.

A wolf was waiting for me! He lunged and bit off my nose. I jumped out of the thingy and ran into a lady with a stroller. She handed me a baby doll saying it was a 'token of her gratitude'. ZOMG! A rabid snail is following me! I ran into the junkyard and collapsed on an old mattress.

****************4 hours later**************

This is a bad headache. And why am I covered in muddy water? And why do I feel like I'm going to puke… again. I just puked over the mattress and started to fly home.

When I finally got there everyone started hugging me except for Max and Fang. Fang wasn't a huggy person, and Max. Oh no! Max is holding the Spoon of Doom.

She lunged at me with it and I ran into her room, locking myself in. I looked down at the empty wrappers of the chocolate I was eating.

Expiration Date: March 5, 2005

Thanks for letting me eat that, Gazzy. YOU SHALL FACE THE SPOON OF DOOM!

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