Hello lovely people~
So, Anovia and I are at it again, but this time it's war! And I will not give up until she is waving her white flag as hard as Italy!
We're doing a series of one shots based one the same setting: a hotel room that's a triffling with arachnids. If you guys have any pairing you'd like to see in this situation please leave a review or PM me or Anovia (preferably me). We're mainly doing this so we can try our hand at writing for different characters. So, this one is a AustriaxSwitzerland. Please send in your pairings, it would help a lot :D
Based on what I've learned about Anovia, she probably wrote long ass author's note. So, I'll be brief. Read. Review. Make me happy :)
Disclaimer: No feelings were hurt in the making of this fic, but a poor spider is probably hiding somewhere, terrified...
"So, that's your bed and this one's mine," decided Roderich, claiming the bed near the window. Vash looked at the Austrian sternly before nodding slightly in agreement.
"That should be fine," the solemn blond claimed as he dropped his backpack on his bed."Yea..." the brunette lingered. The room was silent for a while. Roderich really didn't know what to say to his new roommate, the Swiss man seemed so distant and isolated.
"So, I'm going to get ready for bed, we have an early day tomorrow," he smiled.
"Okay," Vash deadpanned as he pulled his laptop out of his backpack. "I just need to do something first." The Austrian nodded and grabbed his pajamas on the way to the bathroom. Once he shut the door, he realized he had forgotten his pajama bottoms and went to fetch them. Vash was lying on his bed, typing on his laptop, already changed.
"How did you do that?" Roderich asked, disbelieving.
"What are talking about?" Vash asked, clearly bored and not looking up from his laptop.
"You changed already?"
"And you didn't? What's taking you so long?"
"Pardon me for not being part ninja, alright?"
"It's not that hard," the Swiss shrugged. "I put away my clothes and put my pajama pants on. I don't know what kind of beauty ritual you have to do that takes four years to get ready but can you hurry up? I need to brush my teeth."
"I'll have you know-"
"Shush," the blond interrupted as he typed away at some buttons on his laptop. The brunette waited a second before he took the chance to speak again.
"Did you just tell me to-"
"Shut up!" The Swiss interjected. He typed a few more buttons and turned up the volume.
"Brother! Can you hear me?" asked a female voice emitted from the computer.
"Yes I can, Lily. Are you okay?" Vash responded. The confused brunette walked over to the blond's bed so he could get a better view of the computer screen. A young blond girl was looking back at him with a shy smile in her face. She had a small pink bow in her hair, looked a little like Roderich's roommate and was also already wearing her pajamas.
"I'm fine, Big Brother!" she grinned. "My roommate Cecilia is really nice."
"Aw," another female voice cooed from the background and Lily's face turned to face it. "You're the sweet one and I told you to call me Cecil."
"Um Lily?" Vash asked in an attempt to get his sister's attention back. "I'm glad you're making friends but please try to refrain from talking to strangers." His sister's grin disappeared and she nodded solemnly.
"You're right, Big Brother. I'll be more cautious. How is your room?" she asked. "Is that your roommate?" She pointed to Roderich and Vash tensed up a little. He slowly turned to face the Austrian who was wishing that he had just gone back to the bathroom.
"Were you just standing there and watching the whole time?" The blond asked coldly.
"Uh, no," he searched around. "I was just looking for, um, this," he decided picking an object off the floor.
"That's a shoe. My shoe. What do you need it for?" the blond asked.
"Yes, I was just taking inventory," he explained, picking up the other shoe. He cursed under his breath when he realized how stupid he looked as Vash and his sister watched him curiously. "See? One, two. Both shoes are present and accounted for. You're welcome," he asserted, letting both fall to the floor as he grabbed his pajama bottoms and headed back to the bathroom. Before he shut the door he heard Vash's sister speak.
"He's strange," she giggled.
"Indeed," the blond male agreed. Once he was alone in the bathroom, Roderich just wanted to go to sleep. He washed his face, moisturized and changed. He was brushing his teeth when he heard a pounding on the door before the Swiss boy simply let himself in. Next time, Roderich was locking the door.
"What is taking you so long?" Vash asked as he put toothpaste on his brush. Roderich simply rolled his eyes and continued to brush his teeth. He couldn't help but notice that the blond brushed in a systematic rhythm, like he had been in the military or something. As they stood there to the sound of swishing toothbrushes, the brunette became increasingly aware of the fact that the Swiss man wasn't wearing a shirt. His pale body wasn't extremely muscular but definitely athletic and very well toned. His pajama pants hung loosely around his waist, falling just below his abs.
"What are you staring at?" Vash asked as he put away his toothbrush. Roderich hadn't even noticed that the blond had finished! The brunette rinsed out his mouth and thinking quick on his feet he replied nonchalantly.
"My shoe. I was mentally taking inventory again. If you don't do that every so often, you'll lose them," he said as he went over to his bed.
"You must really care about shoes," the blond observed. "Do you have a lot of them?" Roderich shrugged but the truth was he really didn't like to spend money on stuff like that. It wasn't worth it, he always told himself. He turned to his backpack, where he had brought a dozen of his favorite books. Tonight, he felt like Shakespeare, he decided as he pulled out Much Ado About Nothing. He settled in his bed and began to read when he noticed the blond doing push ups on the floor. He tried to focus on his book, he really did, but the boy just kept going.
"Do you really have to do that?" The brunette huffed.
"Yes," Vash answered, not stopping. "Keeps your mind alert and prevents you from getting soft, not that you care." Roderich squinted his eyes.
"You think I'm soft?"
"I didn't say that, you hear what you want to hear," he replied, his push ups now numbering into the triple digits.
"I can do just as many pushups as you," Roderich spat. "Fine, then join me," he retorted, still doing his exercise. The brunette considered this for a moment and then shifted in his bed.
"I would but I already changed into my pajamas, wouldn't want to get all sweaty," he explained.
"Doesn't matter, I'm done," the blond claimed, getting off the floor. He glanced up at the Austrian. "Do I look sweaty to you?" he smirked as he gestured at his body. Roderich looked flustered and simply returned back to his book mumbling something about showoffs. Before Vash went to bed, he pulled a pajama top out of his suitcase and began to button it up. Roderich noticed that the stitching was different than some of the other clothes he'd seen.
"Where did you get that?"
"My sister made it for me, why?" The blond shot back.
"Just wondering, you don't have to be so hostile."
"I'm not hostile," Vash replied, indignantly. The brunette shrugged, deciding not to push any further. His roommate decided he was going to sleep when he noticed a furry, eight legged creature crawling across his bed. The Swiss stepped back a moment and studied his adversary that was encroaching upon his territory. Roderich was watching the scene and was just about to propose a solution when the blond pulled out a gun from God knows where and began to fire at the arachnid. The sudden sound of gunshots rang in the Austrian's ears as he ducked behind his bed for cover. Vash just kept shooting as the spider somehow manage to dodge the hail of bullets and scurry off the bed and under the front door. Satisfied with himself, the blond stopped shooting, just in time to see his bed collapse. He tilted his head to the side and surveyed the wreckage in front of him. Then he turned to Roderich who was just coming out from behind his bed.
"What the Hell was that?" the brunette demanded.
"That's my bed," Vash claimed nodding to the one Roderich was now sitting on.
"What?"
"You heard me, it's mine. Move."
"You blew your bed to smithereens and you expect me just to give mine to you?"
"I don't expect. You will give me that bed," he said far too calmly for Roderich's liking.
"I won't."
"I'm waiting."
"I'm not moving."
"You want to bet?" the blond asked, raising his gun to the Austrian's face.
"You wouldn't shoot me."
"I guess that's two bets you'd lose today."
"Oh come on, why don't we just share?" the brunette offered.
"I don't share," the Swiss man said coolly.
"I'm not going to sleep on the floor," Roderich claimed.
"You don't have to sleep on the floor, you can take some sheets from my bed and sleep on them."
"The sheets with the bullet holes?"
"That's not my concern."
"I'm not moving."
"Well, I guess we're at an impasse," the blond said sarcastically. "I wonder how we're going to settle this," he wondered, tapping the barrell of his gun on his chin. Roderich rolled his eyes.
"Put that thing away."
"Get off my bed."
"I'm not moving."
"Neither am I." They glared at each other for a moment before the brunette sighed.
"Look, I know it's not what either of us expected, but there's only one bed and we can both fit. Just share the bed with me."
"I don't-"
"Yea, 'you don't share' but look if you don't we'll just spend the night arguing and no one will get any sleep."
"Not if I shoot you."
"That's true, but illegal weapons aside, we both need to sleep somewhere, so just, come on." Roderich finished, scooting over and making space for the solemn Swiss. The blond rolled his eyes and tucked his gun into his pajamas, after putting it on safety mode, Roderich tried to see where but it was almost as if it disappeared into thin air. The blond sat on the side of the bed, far away from the brunette and contemplated their position.
"All right, I'll sleep under the covers and you sleep over," he resigned.
"But it's like 16 degrees in here."
"And that's my problem because?"
"Fine, I'll just turn off the air conditioning," the brunette suggested, searching for the remote.
"So you can suffocate me under the covers in the heat? No, the air conditioning stays on."
"Suffocate you in-what? No, it's just too cold."
"I like it cold."
"Then why don't you sleep over the covers?"
"And freeze?"
"But you just said-"
"Nobody touches the thermostat."
"Why?"
"They charge you extra for changing the temperature here," he said softly. "And it's not like I care about the money, it's just this is a good temperature, I like it."
"Okay," the Austrian agreed, not wanting to spend a couple extra bucks on the temperature. "So, what about the bed situation?"
"Alright, I've got a different idea," the blond claimed getting up and heading over to his suitcase. He rifled through his stuff for a while and Roderich was a little frightened he might pull out the gun again but soon the Swiss produced a roll of duct tape. He walked back over to the bed and laid out a path of tape right down the middle. "Ok," he began, setting the tape down on the night stand. "That's your side and this is my side. Stay on your side, if you cross the line, I will not hesitate to shoot you." Roderich rolled his eyes but nodded.
"Can I have the side near the lamp? I like to read before I go to sleep," the brunette asked, holding up his book.
"Nope. I can't sleep with the light on," Vash claimed, turning off the light. Click.
"Are you serious?" the Austrian asked in the dark.
"I don't joke," the blond responded. Roderich clicked his tongue and slid to the other side of the bed, turning on the lamp. Click.
"I'm not done with that."
"I am," Vash replied calmly, turning it back off. Click.
"I want to read." Click.
"I want to sleep." Click.
"Mein Gott, have you ever heard of compromise?" Click.
"Compromise isn't a real thing. There are always winners and losers," Vash claimed right before he shot the lamp, causing the room to plummet into permanent darkness. "And today, you lose. Goodnight."
A/N: So, what did you think? Please review and go check out Anovia's story. I haven't read it yet but I have a feeling it's going to be hilarious. Thanks for reading!