This might only be funny to people like me but no ones perfect.
One day Voldemort nicked a big bomb from some muggles because he finally figured out that killing Harry Potter using magic was too hard, so he decided to do it the old muggle way. He set off the bomb which blew up Hogwarts and killed everyone in it.
After evilly laughing for about ten minutes he decided to go home for a cup of evil guy tea. As he walked down the road feeling very proud of himself, he tripped over a cat, (which for your information was called Fluffy) fell over, hit his head, and died of concussion.
Moments before the destruction of the school Harry found out that some random girl who had some strange connection with Professor Snape, was infact his twin sister.
Ginny realised that Harry was a bit of a stupid pillock and decided not to fancy him any more.
Professor Dumbledor discovered that he didn't actually know what a naked woman looked like.
Ron found his first chest hair and just to keep everybody happy, Hermione and Draco were having it off under the invisibility cloak in the staff room.
The End