AN: Hello everyone, this is my first story I've ever written for fanfiction. I hope you all love it, follow it and review. This kind of stuff happens so if any of you self harm and get triggers easily, I will warn you there will triggers. Main triggers will be warned. So make sure to read my AN at the beginning of the story.

Original posted: 1/3/14 Recently updated: 7/18/16

Words: 1,434(without AN)

Chapter 1

I walk down the street like I do everyday where I cross each street without looking. Like what is the point? I don't care if I am hit. Who would care? No one, is the answer.

Today is the first day of my senior year. Most people would be happy, but not me. As I walk I stuff my hands further into my pockets because I am starting to feel a wave of anxiety hit me. The cause you might ask, while that's the worry of what is waiting for me inside. Looking back on it now, things have gotten worse throughout the years.

Before I can go completely down memory lane, I shake my head and clear those thoughts and memories. I can't be thinking like this right now I need to be strong. I then walk for another 5 more minutes thinking about nothing. As I reach the school grounds I pull my sleeves down more to fully cover my marks completely.

I am wearing a long sleeve shirt that is purple with black skinny jeans, and my black sweater. In case you have not noticed I like dark clothes, they reflect my mood. That's how I've always dressed.

I walk through the door of my high school which has been my own personal hell hole for the past 4 years. I stop and take a quick deep breathe. I know I must looked weird doing this, because I am just standing in the middle of a doorway closing my eyes to focus on my breathing. This is the only way I can calm myself down now a days. But before it can work I slip into a flashback of last night's events.

~~~Flashback~~~

Lying in my bed looking at the ceiling, I hug my blades tightly to my chest. I used to be better then this. What happened? I ask myself.

I quickly get pulled from my thoughts when I hear my mom calling me for dinner.

Wow, she actually cared enough to call me for dinner tonight. I get off my pale purple bed and I start to head down the stairs.

When I get down there, I find my step dad, my little sister Prim and mom sitting at the table already. I sit down in my chair which is between Prim and my step dad. Looking at everyone in my family, I am the odd ball. Prim looks like my mom, blonde with blue eyes. It makes sense since Prim is only my half sister. You see her dad is my step dad. Which is why I don't look like her at all. I inherited all my looks from my dad, his gray eyes and dark brown hair.

My parents got married young and had me not even a year later. Everything was fine until I was 2. My parents would fight all the time and I would spend days with out seeing my mom. When she came home, she would come home drunk. Dad tried to keep it together for me, but it was not worth it anymore. He packed everything up and left. My mom blamed me for wrecking their relationship. She still blames me and it has been almost 16 years, and looking like my dad doesn't help. A couple months after their divorce my mom remarried, and then 4 years later Prim came along. My mom pictures her as the perfect child, and then theirs me, the mistake.

Dinner goes by slowly has always. I eat what I can, but I don't care enough. It does not help that its all rabbit food. I have to eat like this at every meal. My mom and Prim always make this because they say my step dad needs to lose weight.

"Katniss?" my mom asks

"Yeah?" I say still playing with my food.

"Why cant you just be more like your sister" she says and smiles at Prim. Then continues "she is beautiful and what are you?"

I feel like I have been slapped. I push my plate away and run up the stairs to my room and lock it behind me. They don't bother to come and check up on me, their mistake. I go to my pillow where my blades are and I pick them up and I head to the bathroom. I roll my sleeve up and I cut multiple times. Thats for not being like Prim. Prim would never do this, she is perfect.

After I'm done I put my blades away and craw into bed, and cry myself to sleep

~~~Flashback End~~~~

I reopen my eyes and I continue to walk towards the main office to go pick up my schedule and get my locker. At the window their is a woman with crazy orange hair. God tell me that is a wig.

She gives me a smile, I can clearly see that It's fake. I look into her eyes and I see them judging me.

"Hello dear. What do you need?" She asks with another fake smile.

"I need my time table and locker combo" I say

"What's your name?" She asks

"Katniss Everdeen" I say with as much proud as I can, because their is nothing to be proud of. With that she gets up and I now can now clearly see her name tag. It reads "Effie Trinket". Odd name for an odd lady.

She returns a couple minutes later. She hands me my schedule and a sticky note with my combo and locker number, with another annoying smile. "Here you go dear. Have a happy happy first day" she says and sits back down in her chair again.

"Thanks" I say and quickly turn around and walk away.

I then turn my attention to my timetable

Period 1- Biology12

Period 2- PE12

Period 3- English 12

Period 4- History 12

My timetable is not that bad. PE will be the only problem, because I will have to get changed. Which is difficultly for me with all my scars, and cut marks which cover my body.

I look at the sticky note and I have to close my eyes and take another deep breathe. My locker is in the Careers hallway this year.

The Careers are what we call the popular people. Their parents are either famous or work for the school board. Having that privilege they always have all their classes together and their lockers together, and lucky for me my locker is in that hallway. Well I should let you know now. They have bullied me all my high school life.

I gather my thoughts and head towards the hallways which is also the English hallway. I get to the rows of lockers and I look at the note to check the number. It reads A18379. I find the locker and I unlock it. I start putting my bag in there when I hear foot steps coming towards me.

I turn my head toward the foot steps and I see them. It is the Careers.

The first Career is Glimmer Miles. Tall, blonde, skinny, every guys dream girl.

Next is Marvel Mayer, tall, also blonde.

He is Glimmers boyfriend. He is probably the nicest of them all and that isn't saying much.

Next is Clove Marbles she is tall, has brown hair, skinny and is glimmer's best friend. Last is Cato. Tall, blonde, and the quarterback for the football team. He is also dating Clove. Cato bullies me the most out of all of them.

The sad thing about this, is I used to be one of them. I was never like them, I was never cruel and I never bullied anyone, and I was never tall, skinny, or beautiful. I was and still am, nothing. My long dark hair and gray dull eyes don't fit in with them. I'm not fat, but I'm not skinny. Sure you can count my ribs but it's not the same.

I snap out of my daydream when I hear Cato say "look what it is, it's Loser Never Clean" that's the nickname he gave me years ago. I quickly turn around and The bell rings. Giving us a warn, telling us we have 5mins to get to class. I grab what I need and turn away and I head to biology.

I am almost through the door of the classroom when I feel someone grab my wrist. I hiss in pain because they grabbed my wrists where my cuts are. I turn around and pull my hand away. I look into the eyes of who it is. It's Cato...

AN:Hope you liked it!