Well, here we are again! Let's give this a proper go, shall we?
I do not own any of the characters you actually recognize.
Beep! Beep! Beep!
This was not good.
In fact, you could say this whole situation was a bit extremely, very, very, incredibly not good—considering he had planned on popping over to Barcelona (not the noseless-dog one, mind you), and ended up careening though a massive and very unfriendly vortex, the Doctor couldn't help but be just a teeny tiny bit disappointed. Perhaps disappointed was not the best word; panicked, however, was. Frantically, he pulled every lever, pressed every button he could find. Nothing. Nothing was working! He was so frustrated, he could scream.
The unhappy Time Lord raked his hands through his hair, clutching at his head in frustration as the TARDIS ricocheted off the walls of the time vortex. Every alarm was sounding, the console glowing a bright, foreboding red. Sparks were flying from every direction- generally not a good sign, seeing as it indicated a large number of things that were going very inexplicably wrong. Suddenly, the TARDIS crashed into the time vortex again, sending the Doctor flying backwards. He scrambled to his feet and gripped the controls.
"Come on, old girl," the Doctor looked pleadingly towards the flashing center column "tell me what's wrong. Tell me-"
Another crash—this time, sending the Doctor hurtling toward the front door. The open front door.
Beep! Beep! Beep!
Theresa McLain rolled over to slam the snooze button on her alarm clock for the third time that morning but, unfortunately for her (but quite fortunately for her maintaining her daily schedule), she misjudged the width of her bed and went tumbling to the floor. She swore loudly, waking her roommate.
"Hey, Terri!" a strong Boston accent shot out from across the dorm room "just because you have to wake up at God-knows-when in the morning doesn't mean the rest of us have to." Linda grumbled and yanked the covers over her head. Theresa, or Terri, made a mental note to keep all further expletives in her head.
Until... "Shit!" 5:45. She was going to be late for her Chemistry lecture again. Launching into crisis-mode, she roughly pulled a hoodie over her pajamas, nearly choking on the mouthwash that was replacing her toothbrush for the morning. Textbook, I.D., notebook, and pencil in hand, Terri waded her way out of the messy dorm room while pulling on her black trainers.
She raced down the empty walkway that would lead her to the Science Hall. Making a quick turn, she glanced at the clock tower. Yes! 5:55. I'll definitely make it by six.
And she would have- really, she would- if it hadn't been for the homeless man sprawled out in front of the library. Though, she wasn't sure most homeless people wore pin-stripe suits. She battled with her conscience for a bit, half intent on leaving him there in favor of being on-schedule for the first time this month, but lost in the end. Damn her conscience.
"Uhm... sir?" Her voice came out in a timid squeak. She cleared her throat, mentally cursing herself as the clock struck six. "Sir?"
A low groan answered her. The homeless man stirred.
Oh God. He's not well. What if it's pneumonia? What is he's hurt? I'm not a doctor! I'm not equipped for this! What if-
Kathrine's frantic thoughts were cut off by a sharp intake of breath, followed by a loud "Whooo! Boy, was that a ride!" The man sat upright in a flash. "Now, what happened? Bumpy time vortex. Bit of a temporal rift above Barcelona, I'd say. Now if I could just get back to the TARDIS…" His eyes widened, he began shaking. Kathrine was at a loss. Who on Earth was this guy? Barcelona? Time vortex? And what in the big, swirly universe is a TARDIS?
The well-dressed homeless man let out a sound of what can only be described as complete and utter defeat. "I've lost the TARDIS..."
Terri wanted to cry. She was not prepared for this. Not only was she convinced this man was a raving lunatic, she was sure beyond a doubt that there was no way she could help him.
Completely ignoring the girl's internal thought-process, he stood up, spun around, and seemed to magically regain his composure. "You. What's your name? Never mind, no time." He rambled on before she could even respond. He strode over to her on his impossibly long legs. "I seem to be in a liiittle bit of a pinch. You see, I'm missing my box. My big, blue phone box. Happen to see one around here?"
"N-no. No, sir. Not that I can recall."
He mumbled "eh, was worth a shot," then turned back the now thoroughly confused college student. "I'm the Doctor, by the way."
Surprised (not for the first time that morning), Terri shook the Doctor's hand. "Oh! What do you teach?"
"Just the Do- I beg your pardon?" The Doctor quirked an eyebrow.
"Oh, uh. Sorry. It's just that any 'doctors' on campus tend to be professors."
Realization dawned on the Doctor's face. "Oooh, a university! I went to Uni once. Not like this, mind you. It was more... on Pluto. But I digress. Blue box." He clapped his hands and began pacing down the walkway. "Can't be far away. Well, actually, it could be millions and trillions of years away or on another planet." a brief, uncomfortable pause "But I prefer to think it isn't, don't you?"
Terri found herself lamely nodding her head.
"Right. Good. Now," he pulled an odd-looking little tool out of the pocket of his tweed jacket "just need to scan for an artron energy signature." The tool whirred, a bright blue light emanating from the tip.
A minute passed. Terri's mood was far from improved as the Doctor's face grew more and more concerned. "What is it?" she managed to choke out.
The Doctor stared at the tool in his hands. "Looks like you've got leeches."
"Leeches?"
"Yup. Quite a lot of them, too. They're sort of jamming the signal on my sonic screwdriver. Can't detect artron with these buggers sucking up all the energy in sight." The Doctor slapped the screwdriver against his palm a few times and glared at it.
Kathrine blinked. "Uhm... Doctor," she felt odd using the term, but couldn't figure out what else to call this impossible man "I don't really follow. Do you mean to say that there are leeches on campus that... eat energy directly, rather than obtaining it from, you know, blood?"
The Doctor spun on his heel to face her. "Oh, no! These aren't your run-of-the-mill hematophages; they latch onto a life form or another energy source and quite literally suck the energy straight out of them." He leaned in towards Kathrine and began muttering as he inspected her left arm "Symptoms include sleepiness, accelerated aging, somewhat unsightly hemorrhages-" the Doctor pinched at the air above her arm and lifted his hand toward his face. Terri watched, horrified, as the previously invisible leech phased into view in the Doctor's hand. "This one's been snacking on you for at least a month."
"Is that why I've been sleeping through Astronomy all month?"
"I'm afraid you'll have to chalk that up to general laziness." the Doctor grinned, but quickly sobered as the severity of the situation hit him. "I've never seen an infestation like this. At this rate, they'll flood every nook and crevice, sucking quanta out from under our noses. They'll keep eating and multiplying 'til the whole world- buildings, plants, people- 'til all of it's nothing but a dried-out husk."
Terri took a moment during the Doctor's monologue to regroup. Invisible quantivorous leeches? Sonic screwdriver? This all sounded like those cheesy sci-fi shows she used to watch when she was little. All that was missing now was a space ship. "I need to lie down." she muttered before collapsing into an awkward heap at the Doctor's feet.
Terri awoke, groggy and slightly sore, to the sound of the Doctor throwing an entire library's worth of books over his shoulder, nearly hitting her in the process. She slowly got up to keep the swimming in her head to a minimum and looked around. The only things that registered in her clouded mind were the bookshelves, which were rapidly becoming empty.
"Ha ha!" There was that laughter again. "Oh, no. That is just too..." The Doctor, alerted by Terri's stirrings, looked away from his book and grinned at her. "Hello again!" He rushed over to her and scanned her with his sonic screwdriver. "Looks like everything's functional." Though he looked more troubled than his cheery tone implied, looking at the device in puzzlement.
"What have you done to the library?" Terri balked, taking in the destruction around her. He shrugged and put the device in his pocket, chalking the odd readings up to a temporary malfunction.
The Doctor spun on his heel, looking around as if he just noticed where he was. "Well, I was just looking for a map. I would have just used a computer, but your library's got no technology to speak of! What kind of university library doesn't have computers?"
"No… what?" Terri eyed the strange man. "Of course we don't have a computer in here! There's not near enough room." She rolled her eyes. "There's one in the Science Hall, in the basement, but you have to be faculty to get any punch cards."
"Punch car-" he stammered. "It's the year 2003, and you're still using punch cards?"
A power outage interrupted his interrogation. The leeches were getting out of hand. He blindly reached for Terri's hand, pulling her along after him.
What followed was a good deal of running (which, in all honesty, Terri was not in proper shape for). Every minute or so, the Doctor would pause in front of a building, consider it for a moment, shake his head and continue running.
Soon enough, Terri became more than a little fed up. "Alright, Doctor, what exactly are we looking for?"
"We need an energy source- a big one- to lure in our quantivourous friends."
She stopped short, causing the Doctor to skid to a halt. "Football." she said, smirking.
"Look, I love a game as much as anyone else, but we have a bit of a crisis here!" he huffed.
Terri shook her head. "No, no. The 'Big Game' tonight. It's a huge deal on campus. Imagine every student gathered in a big stadium surrounded by huge, bright lights." She rolled her eyes "I can't believe I'm saying this; but these alien... quantum leechy-things won't be able to resist a feast like that."
The Doctor grabbed the poor girl and spun her around. "Brilliant! Where's the field?"
She smiled. Now it was her turn to drag him along.
Upon arriving at the field, the Doctor began running around, sonicking the massive light fixtures that surrounded the stadium. He then hurried up into the stands and turned his attention toward the speakers. "That ought to do it!" He turned to Terri, beaming. "I've maximized the output on every bit of equipment in this stadium. These leeches aren't exactly good at rationing their energy supply. They'll keep absorbing until they burst; which is exactly what we need to happen!"
Terri nodded, coming to terms with this outlandish situation, while the Doctor rambled on excitedly. "Right, so now we just wait until the game starts." She checked her watch. "Should take about... three hours."
The Doctor stopped short, a horrified look claiming his features. "Three hours?" he balked "What on Raxacoricofallapatorius are we supposed to do for three hours?"
"Uhm..." Terri stammered, somewhat floored by the concept of entertaining this madman. Deciding that she couldn't properly take on a task of that caliber, she opted for her usual fall-back plan. "Who's up for tea?"
Much to her surprise, the Doctor grinned, and was more than willing to come to her dorm room for tea. 'I really could go for some chamomile. Do you have any bananas?'he'd said as she lead him up the stairs into her room.
Now for the hard part. Terri timidly tapped on the door. A curly-haired, busty woman wearing a tight yellow t-shirt yanked the door open, grinning at them.
"Terri!" she chirped, pulling her roommate into a hug. The two smiled at each other for a second, then her attention was quickly drawn to the tall, smiling, undeniably attractive man in a VERY tight suit standing before her. "Well, hello there, handsome." She arched an eyebrow and smirked.
"Doctor, this is Linda. Linda, Doctor." Terri sighed, knowing what was coming next.
Linda gasped dramatically. "Oh, a doctor? Katie, you shouldn't have." She cooed as she dragged the both of them into the tiny dorm room. She winked at the Doctor, causing him to blush and rake a hand through his hair. She moved closer, inches away from his rapidly reddening face.
"Down, Linda." Terri put a restraining hand on her friend's shoulder, snickering lightly.
Linda laughed and shoved Terri playfully. "Oh, come on. You finally land a cute doctor and you won't even share? Or are you still holding out for your space-man?" The girls laughed harder.
"Er..." The Doctor cleared his throat, still blushing. "If you don't mind, ladies, I could really do with a cup of tea. Bit of a rough day."
Linda's jaw dropped. "He's British!" she whispered, squeezing Terri's arm.
"Alright, alright. That's enough." Terri called behind her as she sifted through an old, battered cupboard and pulled out a box of chamomile, a hot pot, and several mismatched mugs. The others sat quietly while she bustled around the room, preparing the tea and searching for appropriate snacks. Minutes later, the trio was seated with a mug of tea and a couple of chocolate digestives.
"So, Terri," Linda broke the silence "how was Astronomy?"
Terri grumbled, running a hand through her short, dull brown hair. "No idea. Probably just as dull as usual."
Linda sighed. "Between missing Astronomy and arguing with your Physics professor, I feel like you might not graduate this year," she chuckled "and then you can be on the six-year plan, like me!"
"It's not my fault Professor Hughes doesn't understand that thinking of time in a linear perspective is a primitive and limited view that prevents us from advanci-"
"Woah, Mr. Spock. Spare us the time-travel lecture. You drove off my last boyfriend with that one." Linda interjected.
"No, no. I'm completely interested. Go on. We have time to kill, after all." The Doctor smirked a little at his wordplay.
Terri tried to pretend she wasn't completely ecstatic that someone was finally interested in her theory, but she quickly dropped the act and bounced in her chair so quickly as she spoke that she nearly spilled her tea. "Well, time is affected by physical means like gravity and position, right? So, the way I see it, it must be a physical substance—more or less. Even if it isn't, it's got to be an element of the coordinate plane. Either way, time exists! Like, not as we see it, not just something that passes us by; it's an actual thing that we're moving through, and it would have to exist with the past, present, and future happening all at once."
"Yes. It does exist. And you're doing a very good job of wasting it." Linda sighed.
The Doctor's eyes lit up. "Oh, you clever girl! Basic Omnipotent Time Theory. Mind you, that's just the basics; practically juvenile, but very good for a human. It's a bit tricky thought, isn't it? I mean, you have to account for alternate dimensions, time pockets, temporal rifts, turbulence. Then there's repeated temporal experiences and the time vortex. But, in theory, you've almost got it."
"Yeah, well, not really." The woman deflated. "I still can't explain time travel, per se. There would have to be some give, you know? Because, if someone could travel freely through time, they'd be able to alter it. But how would that work if all of time already exists?"
"Ah, it's all just sort of… Wibbly-wobbly timey-wimey."
Linda groaned. "Oh, Lord, make it stop!" She slammed her head against her desk in mock-anguish. "The illusion is shattered."
The Doctor furrowed his brow and sipped at his tea. "The illusion?"
Terri laughed. "She thought you were hot until about ten seconds ago."
"The accent's great and all, but you're obviously a geek like Terri."
The younger geek laughed, while the Doctor managed to look offended, befuddled, and slightly amused. "Well, anyway, it's not like it matters." Terri laughed. "Even if I could figure out the rest of the theory, it's not like I'll be able to build a time machine or something."
Linda giggled. "Yeah, you'll just have to wait for your precious spaceman to sweep you off to the stars!"
Terri blushed. "Oh, come on, Linda, not today."
The Doctor quirked a brow and shot a glance at Terri, making her blush even harder. "Spaceman?"
"Yes! Oh my little Terri Bear told me, when we were very very drunk one night at the bar down the street, that she always wished" she did a mocking impression of her friend "that she could 'find herself an alien—or a time traveler!—to take her away to the stars, and she'd never have to see this stupid town again.' Said she'd seduce them if she had to." With that, Linda threw a wink at the very embarrassed alien time-traveler.
"OK! Tea time over! Time to go to the football game!" Terri shouted, jumping to her feet and grabbing the mugs out of their hands.
"You're going to a football game?" Linda grinned.
"Y-yeess?" Terri answered cautiously as she pushed the Doctor toward the door.
"Wait!" Linda shouted as they headed out. "There is no way-nostinkin' way- I am letting my little Terri Bear go to her first actual, honest-to-God, American, football game without me as a witness." With that decided, she grabbed an atrocious maroon hat and dashed out the door behind them.