Title: Chasing After Fault
Pairing: Klaine
Rating: PG
Word Count: 926
Summary: Kurt and Blaine have rebuilt their relationship two years into the future but that doesn't mean either of them has forgotten their mistakes.
Warnings: ANGST ANGST ANGST, mentions of infidelity.
Author's Notes: Sorry?
"I'm sleeping on the couch. God forbid I leave, who knows who you'll run off to if I leave again."
The moment stays suspended as the words that have just slipped from Kurt's mouth hang in the air between them. There is a beat of silence. All of the sudden the guilt pours through him and he can feel his face heat up with it, the tears in his eyes stinging as his hand twitches out desperately wanting to snatch the words back. It's too late.
The argument had started off fairly small. Blaine had forgotten to put his shoes away again and for the umpteenth time in a month Kurt had nearly broken his neck tripping over them in the entryway. Everything had escalated from there; from those damn shoes in the damn hallway because it really isn't that difficult to put them in the damn closet two feet away from the front door. It had turned into circling around one another in the living room, hands in the air, clenched fists, and bitten lips, trying so hard not to just lash out in anger. It was all in vain. One thing led to another and Kurt hit his boyfriend below the belt with the lowest blow he could pull out.
It wasn't like they never talked about it, Blaine cheating. But they were supposed to have moved past it. After all, it had been almost two years. Two years of regaining trust and building a new foundation for a relationship that had once been so strong they believed nothing could tear it down. The problem was communication in the end. Blaine never was good at dealing with being alone and when Kurt had left for New York to chase his dreams at NYADA their relationship took a beating. Blaine spent late nights on the computer with eyes lidded with sleep just for the chance to talk to Kurt when he got out of bed for classes in the morning and after classes and his internship late at nights. And Kurt had found this whole new life outside of their itty-bitty lives that he enjoyed. Maybe a little too much. Blaine felt ignored and betrayed, rightfully so but in that moment of weakness he ruined a two year relationship with the love of his life. Maybe it hadn't even been weakness, maybe it was just plain stupidity.
Kurt suddenly understands that moment of weakness, that feeling of recklessness building up in his chest screaming to get out. He is vaguely aware that he's crying but it's barely noticeable because his boyfriend is crying even harder. Blaine is standing not even four feet from him, arms curled around himself and head bowed with shame and guilt that will never leave his heart. Kurt wants to pull him into his arms and apologize over and over, take it back and make it okay. The truth is, it will never be okay. Their past will always be there and neither of them can change that no matter how hard they try to push it away. Kurt's heart will always jump in his throat when he sees him with another guy and he'll never get over that millisecond of panic he gets when Blaine isn't on time anymore.
But that doesn't give him the right to throw Blaine's infidelity back on him like it's just another piece in a large pile of trash. Shoes in the hallway are one thing, leaving the bathroom light on is one thing, even forgetting to change the sheets isn't so bad. But to just pluck that moment from the back of his mind, the worst of the worst, was the lowest thing that he could have done. Kurt chokes on his tears as he tries to form new words, better words to make up for what he said but he can't.
Blaine walks slowly to the front door and bends down to the shoes that are strewn across the floor. For a moment it looks as if he's going to put them in the closet but then he's pulling them on his feet and swiping his keys from the side table next to the door. Kurt is frozen in the living room, unable to move and heart beating wildly out of his chest, staring as his boyfriend pulls the door open to leave.
"Please, please don't leave. Please, Blaine." It's all that comes out.
Blaine doesn't stop. He doesn't even turn around before he's out of the apartment. The door clicks shut. The sound is deafening in the silence that follows and it echoes in Kurt's head over and over. It sounds exactly the same as when it had been him walking out the door two years ago. The thought feels like a kick in the gut and he has to clutch the coach to stop from collapsing to the floor. This could be the end. This could be what ruins them for the last time. Those words, communication, could destroy them.
He slides to the floor and looks around the apartment. It is everything that they are from the maroon and navy carpet on the floor to the sandalwood scented candle burning in the kitchen. It is everything that is home to him, to both of them, that doesn't feel right without Blaine there. He hugs his knees close to his chest and drops his head to make it all disappear. All Kurt can do is sit. And wait. And hope.
He'll come back. He will. He has to.