Kiss Me Goodbye
I slowly make myself step out of the car once Rumple leaves. I won't allow myself to say the words. I can't. If I say it I will break. I take a deep breath and walk towards the man I love. He's chosen me and even though we cannot be together that will have to be enough to carry me through.
"The diner I told you about is just a few miles down the road," I say trying to keep from saying it.
"Right. Uh, Regina..." Robin says before I stop him. I won't let him say it either.
"And you have the map I gave you. And the money so that should be plenty to get you started."
"Yes, but..."
"Good. Then you should go." Don't look him in the eyes I tell myself, it'll only make this worse.
"Thank you."
Marian shudders behind him and crouches down. The spell is moving too quickly. There is not enough time for me to say everything I need to say to him. But not that...Never that.
"She needs to cross the line." I say. "NOW!"
Robin turns to Marian "Ok, you guys go. I'll be right behind you, I promise. I just-I need a moment, ok?"
"Of course." Marian says to him before turning to me. "Thank you."
I nod. I can see the pain in her eyes. This is not what she wants. As she told me in the diner, she wants to be chosen but she also knows that she can't go alone. She turns, taking Roland's hand.
They step over the line and through the spell. Immediately the ice is gone. She laughs as she lifts Roland up and spins him in a circle. She stops and I realize she can't see us.
"Robin?!" she asks, setting Roland down.
"Your family is waiting." I tell Robin as he turns back towards me. "Go."
He turns away and starts walking towards the line. I look down and take a deep breath, desperately holding back the tears that threaten to fall. I look back up and he steps back towards me and his hands are in my hair, his lips crashing against mine.
My mind goes completely blank. There is only him. That forrest smell. His moustache and beard softly scratching my skin. His hands in my hair. This is the goodbye that neither of us are strong enough to say out loud. I feel his lips leave mine and I know this is it. He places one last gentle kiss on my lips and rests his forhead against mine.
"I-" he starts, struggling to speak.
"I know." I say. I smile slightly.I look into his eyes and see the tears that are begining to fall. I have to be strong for him. All those years of wearing an emotionless mask could never have prepared me for this heartbreak.
He drops his hands from my head and I grab them. I can't let go. Not yet. He starts to back away as I drop one of my hands. He has a firm grip on my left hand. I take a step towards him as he backs away. I won't let go until the last second. He steps through the spell and his fingers slide from my hand.
I watch as tears fall down his face. He squeezes his eyes shut and turns as he hears Roland.
"Papa!" he says.
Robin turns and picks him up. He turns back to me and I am glad that he can't see me cause I know my mask is falling. I can no longer hide this pain. Tears cloud my vision as I reach my hands into my pockets. I feel the paper Robin gave me earlier.
I pull out the "extra" page from the storybook. The meeting we never had in the pub. My happy ending. I grab the page with both hands and rip it in half. Now that Robin is gone I can't stand to look at it anymore. I keep ripping it as tears begin to fall.
I turn back towards the car and let the pieces fall from my hand.
"Goodbye, Robin." I say softly to myself as I walk away.
Author's Note: This is my first Outlaw Queen fanfic, but I felt it needed to be done. I'd like to know what you guys think, so leave me a review if you have time. If not, thanks for reading.