Hm. I found this written in my notebook. I wrote it while I was in a very un-sober state of mind. I guess I can write well about characters who go insane because I'm kinda crazy. It was very, very hard to read.
I'm lying here and I feel it. The cold caresses my body, licking and sweeping over my skin. Numbs my already numb body. the end the end the end THIS IS THE END. Gray everywhere. Is this real. Am I dreaming. Please let me wake up. Let me be a child. Wake up in my parent's bed knowing they will protect me. This can't be the end. The world is not REAL if I'm not in it because how can it be there if I'm dead! This is a dream! This is not my end because the world can't EXIST IF IT IS. Let me feel, numb is not okay. Let me feel this unreal dream ground. If this is not a dream I want to feel before I go PLEASE. Let me feel the grass if this is the end. Will I remember into eternity forever? the grass? Because it might be the last I feel? Please save me. End the nightmare. I don't want this to be the end. So much missed. Please. GOD PLEASE. I feel it coming. Please wake me this is so goddamn soul wrenching. I can SEE my death. Stop it! End this! Take me away from this! Suffer suffer suffer me fucking not. Stop this. It's against the rules you fucking rule breaker. I'll tattle on you I swear I will. And then who will be laughing? ME so end this. Whatever it takes. Take my mind I don't want it anymore I think it's lost. Find it and you can have it. No takes backs. OLLY OLLY OXIN FREE! Remember that? Hide and seek. The baby muppets in the room with a step by the window and a sleepy place, and carpet on the floors. How I want that. To be in that time of unreal eternity of nothing of existence. Death is not there. Nothing is there. Only forever and love. And basements with blankets in cupboards that are soft and fuzzy with a hole. AND FUCKNIG GERBALS THOSE MOTHER FUCKERES. Big enough for a cats head. Lots of cats. Where the hell did they come from? Everywhere they are. Get them away from me. PLEASE. Memories and memories. I can't escape. Bury them but they come back! Oh they return they show up and they're not gone they're there! Run away from the fucking memories and forget you exist forget it and never remember it again. You fuck up don't you dare. Save yourself. You're drowning pull up please get the air. Time of death is now. Fuck you. I don't exist anymore.