warning- this entire fic is based off of self harm and suicidle idealition. If that is not something you can handdle please press the back button. Also, if you are depressed and you find this triggering I would suggest the same action. Otherwise procced!

A/N: This is a little something a wrote a while back. It's… depressing I guess. Self harm and angst abound Read with care. Song lyrics through out. In this chapter Candles by Hey Monday.

Synesthesia- when your senses become mixed up, so you might hear colors or numbers could have personalities. In this case, people, smells, and feeling have color. It's unrealistic but that's what it's based off of

Cherry Red

Sakura stared wistfully at the mirror. Her naked form stared back, hauntingly thin to some, but still a layer of baby-fat, round on her stomach. She could see her ribs starting to poke out, her hip bone jutted out, and her wristed look thin enough to snap. Her eyes washed out to a paler shade. Her cherry red hair thinning and becoming more pastel as time pasted. Everything smelled, felt, tasted of cherry red, it was eating her sense alive, I left only an empty corpse of a girl behind with an unhealthy fixture on a pattern of number the machine underneath her showed. Those number mocked her, dancing colors of grey always accompanied them, various shades, but all telling her that she wasn't good enough.

"98 pounds" she muttered "I look fat enough to be 105" she pinched at nonexistent fat, pulled her skin. Her eyes began to brim with the pain, the shame, the hurt. Sinking to the floor in a heap she put her head between her knees "God, what I'm doing to myself!" she looked up at her reflection. She couldn't take it anymore; she was losing control of everything. She use to be able to control the eating; she use to be able to control her exercise.

She couldn't eat anymore; she could barely make it through a school day.

"I need more control"

The power lines went out
And I am all alone
But I don't really care at all
Not answering my phone
All the games you played
The promises you made
Couldn't finish what you started
Only darkness still remains

Sitting in the empty tub Sakura stared as the candle light reflected off her damp skin.

Ever since He left everyone had gone down hill. Maybe it was just puberty fucking with them, but no one was left untouched by whatever plagued Kahonas' teenage population. Sakura knew He helped bring it all on. Not that the dark asshole could cause the whole thing, but it seem to be the trigger of the gun of their depression.

"Am I still annoying?"

Too fat

Too ugly

Too pink

Too loved

Sakura's candle goes out with a hiss and a plumb of scented smoke. Sighing, Sakura sits up in her tub and grabs a new match. Lighting it against the edge of the box, she carefully held it to the wick

"Ouch" she murmured, dropping the burnt out match stick on the porcelain tile. She stared blankly at the box full of more sticks. She took out one more ant lit it. She held it to her left wrist carefully.

Burnburnburn

Peeling away at the layers of flesh

Blacking the bone

Burning away all the fatfatfat

The cherry red light burned so softly

It stung

And severed he nerves

But she was in control

A small smile pulled at her red lips, the same color as the soft flickering light of the candle distorting her pretty features, marring it with an ugly image of what was inside. What she had to keep inside.

She blows the candles out. Looks like a solo tonight.

The early January air bit sharply at her exposed skin, but the winter weather made long sleeves a necessity. Something of a relief, because it covered the evidence of her newly acquired control; which had become something of a habit.

Sliding in among the faceless crowd of empty minded students Sakura makes her was to homeroom just as the bell rings. It doesn't matter if she's late because the sky will become red and gravity will fail before her teacher is ever there 10 after the bell rings.

As she trudged into homeroom she was hit by 2 things, only one person sat on the left side of the room. And that person was Him, sitting in the back with his black bangs covering his eyes, head pressed against the window. Her stomach clutched at the familiar aura he gave off.

'HateConfusionHateAkwardnessHateWorryHateDepressionHateDisragardedHate'

Midnight blue and formidable black

Been black and blue before
There's no need to explain
I am not the jaded kind
Playback's such a waste
You're invisible
Invisible to me
My wish is coming true
Erase the memory of your face

Sitting down in the front of Sasukes' row, Sakura was soon joined by a comforting sunshine yellow presence in her mind.

"SmileWantingSmileCaringSmileHurtSmileDepressionSmileNeedySmile"

"Hey Sakura-chan!" Naruto proclaimed giving her a toothy grin "Don't you hate the weather? All this cold, grey-ness gets to a guy"

"Yeah, and it means midterms soon" Sakura said looking over at the bright boy. Squinting at him, there was something… out of place with him. She just had this feeling. Something seemed less bright about him.

"Your eyes" she says "They're different…" what use to be sparkling summer blue had changed to ocean blue when He left. Now they where undeniably navy

"Really? I didn't notice" He said giving her a smile and a wave of blinding white in his pattern; he was lying to her

"It's prolly just the lights" She says turning a way, still worried about the boy. She could tell he was struggling just as she was, if not worse. With the new addition of Him it could all become too much. She immersed herself in her thoughts about what could become of this new issue. All the colors of her world over whelmed her thoughts, the smell of Moonstone and Cobalt, the feel of everyone's auras, the light acrid taste of teal. The balckness of her closed eyes muted all of it, leaving her in a quieted world.

"Naruto" tensing and opening jade eyes, the cherry-headed girl turned to the midnight boy. Her sense narrowed down on the two clashing personalties, so concentrated she could barely see anymore colors

Lost sight
Couldn't see
When it was you and me

"Uchiha" Naruto said, turning to face his old friend, rival, and brother. Tacking a smile on, they looked almost the same, but their interactions had changed along with their bodies. Naruto; liquid sunshine hair, caramel skin, and deep blue eyes. Sasuke; a mass of dark hair and eyes, both with blue tints, mixed with marble skin and stone features. "Hn" his eyes flick slightly to the left "You've changed" He wouldn't even look directly at his eyes, couldn't look at the misery he'd caused. He could even talk to her, because she was too fatfatfat.

"You haven't" The blond replied, turning back to stare at the board, avoiding those vortexes that sucked the color out of everything; his eyes. They had always been Sakuras' favorite feature on her dark team mate. They where dangerous, but she loved a bit of peril. Maybe she was just a bit of masochist.

"Narto…" he trailed off. Was he hesitating? That dusty pink aura wasn't normal and it wasn't in an Uchiha behavior to hesitate "I'm" he paused again, eyes shifting to the left again. He's nervous, she realized "I'mSorry" he murmured, eyes switching quickly over to Sakura, only a second thought to the dark boy "Both of you" He quickly strode back to his widow seat. Giving off brighter traces of rose pink. Now he's embarrassed?

Sakura finds this whole thing utterly confusing, thank you. That was not an Uchiha thing to do, who had taken Sauske, and drained him of all his former rules, pride, and duty to his clan? Even if he really meant it… she couldn't forgive him now.

One day
You will wake up
With nothing but "you're sorrys"
And someday
You will get back
Everything you gave me

Sunny: Sooooooo, what's the ruling? Yay or nah? Silent readers are okay but review and such to make my day. :)

See you soon ya'll, have a good one.