DISCLAIMER: I don't own Devil May Cry.
Dante walked into the club, the bouncer stepping out of his way timidly. He sat down at the bar, a young bargirl already moving to serve him. "Hey, there! What'll it be?"
"Strawberry sundae."
The girl stepped back, surprised. "We don't serve strawberry sundaes here."
Dante shrugged. "Oh, well. There's no accounting for taste. Better make it a Jack Daniels, then."
The girl smiled, handing him a large tankard of Jack Daniels.
"Thanks."
As Dante began to drink, there was a commotion at the door. He turned to see a small man with dark hair, wearing a dark coat, arguing with the bouncer. He looked the man up and down.
"What a douchebag. He looks like he tried to blend punk and emo, and did a shit job on both. And that sword he's carrying? Looks like he made it in shop class when he was five."
Dante watched as the man punched the bouncer, knocking him out, and catching the bouncer's clipboard. The man wrote something on the clipboard, before dropping it on the bouncer's chest. Dante's enhanced vision could easily read that it said "FUCK YOU" in big letters. Dante rolled his eyes.
"Really? That's your big comment? You gotta be kidding."
Dante drank his Jack Daniels, and headed rapidly to the door, moving at superhuman speed. He caught the young man by the arm, flinging him back out the door. The man recovered quickly, and stood, glaring at Dante.
"So, kid, what the hell do you think you're doing?"
The young man glared. "You haven't heard? I'm Dante."
Dante was surprised, but he didn't show it. "What a coincidence. That's my name. Personally, I don't think you deserve it, ya phony."
"Dante" lifted the plain sword from his back, glaring at Dante. Dante lifted up his guitar case, extracting Rebellion, his massive devil blade. "Let's party, junior!"
"Dante" charged forward, swinging his sword at Dante. Dante easily blocked every attack that was sent his way, laughing the whole time. "Dante" jumped backwards, having proven far weaker with swords than his counterpart. Dante threw his sword into "Dante's" chest, and "Dante" collapsed on the concrete on his knees, screaming, trying to pull out the sword but unwilling to. Dante folded his arms, tapping his foot on the concrete.
"Come on, you pussy! That's nothing! I've been hurt worse shaving!"
"Dante" collapsed on his side, screaming louder. Dante decided enough was enough. Controlling his sword with his mind, Dante made Rebellion throw "Dante" into the air. As "Dante" was falling, Dante pulled out his pistol, firing a charged shot into "Dante", blowing him to pieces.
"I think that look suits you better."
Dante sat in the Devil May Cry afterwards, laughing.
"That loser was actually supposed to be me?!"
Trish shrugged. "That guy appeared recently, claiming to be you. He went around making an idiot out of himself, and now everyone thinks he is Dante. Your name's really been dragged through the mud by that loser."
Dante laughed again. "Were you serious when you said he was meant to be half angel?! What a joke!"
Trish shrugged. "Yeah. The whole design shows terrible taste."
Dante shrugged. "It's ok. He's all over the ground in front of that nightclub now. I don't think he's ever gonna be seen again."
Trish smiled. "So, if Capcom has any brains, you'll be called back to save the franchise."
The two devil hunters looked over at Dante's desk as the phone rang.
"Devil May Cry." Said Dante into the phone. "I don't know. I think I deserve a pretty good raise after that shit you guys tried to pull. No, double isn't enough. How about triple?"