Ice: Elaine here with another story! Oiy vey.

After reading PhoenixClaw's The Incredible Shino-Yes, I'm plugging your stories again, get used to it-I wondered what it would be like it Shino went all wimpy-like. I was THEN going to suggest the thing to him, but I decided to be mean. So nyeah.

Characters © Kishimoto

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"Shino, will you please do this?!" Kiba and Hinata looked at him with pleading eyes. He sighed. The team had just come home from a B-ranked mission. All were tired, and hungry, and Kiba instantly saw a sign posted on the town bulletin board, so the were berating Shino to sign it.

"Why do you want me to do this again?"

"You're the only one who's had at least two hours of singing lessons!" Shino raised an eyebrow at Kiba, in both confusion and slight irritation.

"How did you know that?"

"Let's just say video cameras and being incredibly bored don't mix too well…Anyway, please Shino? We'd be obligated to do something for you!" Kiba looked at the quiet boy with chibi-esque eyes. Unfortunately, Shino was a rock, made of 100 percent pure stainless steel. Approved by the Steel Association of America!

"Kiba, no. That might work with your mom but…just no." He kicked the dirt-covered ground.

"Look, we've gotten three successful missions in a row; you could at least throw us a frickin' bone!" Kiba was really straining for options now. Nervously, he looked over at Hinata to bring out the big guns.

"Shino, I'll bake a cake for you!" This was very tempting. Hinata always had delicious baked goods, and her German Chocolate cakes were to die for. He fidgeted in an odd manner, pondering whether or not he should go with what they asked.

"I'm sorry Hinata. But I will not do that." She dropped her shoulders in defeat. There was no breaking this guy! Her cakes and cookies could break even Itachi!

"…do you even have the outfit?" Shino asked, wondering why in the hell he was curious.

"……………………………….no." Kiba looked over at Hinata for moral support.

"B-But I can make it; quickly!" Hinata said, nervously. Shino slowly shook his head, with and annoyed Kiba crossing his arms.

"Alright; we just won't perform at the show then. Let's just get home." Kiba said half-heartedly, and added softly, "We could've gotten two-hundred bucks out of the deal, but nooooo." Slowly and surely he walked behind him, thinking of devious ways to get Shino to do it.

And then, it suddenly came to the dog-nin.

He silently went over to a tree, and looked in the grass.

'Ah-ha!' He mentally pointed a finger in the air, 'I've found the perfect way to break Shino!' He picked up a random beetle on the ground, and went over to Hinata, to whisper his diabolic plan in her ear.

"But Kiba! Why would you do that?"

"It'll be the only way we can get him to crack." She fidgeted underneath her coat.

"I don't know…"

"Come on! You want this as much as I do!"

"Well, yeah, but…"

"Come on, Hinata!"

"Kiba, I don't really want to…"

"Fine, as long as we break 'im, we win…I guess…" Kiba softly tread steps up to the boy, and dropped the bug he held on the ground.

And crunched it under his foot.

Shino halted.

He really emphasized the destruction of the beetle too; sliding his foot back and forth across it, and doing the moon walk on it, just enough to get his attention.

"Kiba…what did you do…" Shino was almost angry. Almost. Mr. Emotive didn't express his emotions in a very healthy manner.

"Oh, that…well…I just squished a bug. Why do you ask?" He gave a sheepish grin.

"K-Kiba…You d-do not und-understand what y-you have d-done." He stuttered. Kiba's smile fell ever so slightly, but shrugged it off.

"Whatsa matter? Did your favorite bug die?" Kiba started break dancing on the squished bug. Shino's eye twitched.

"Ki-Kiba…" He barely maintained his stance. After Kiba gave the bug the finger, Shino couldn't take it anymore.

He got down on his hands and knees, and cried like a little baby.

No, I'm serious.

"WHYYYY?! WHY DID YOU HAVE TO GO, HERBERT?! WHYYY?!" He put his fingers under his sunglasses to stop the tears. Kiba's eyes widened at the boy, as did Hinata's.

"Um…Shino?"

"WHY GOD?! WHY COULDN'T YOU HAVE TAKEN ME INSTEAD?!"

"Shino, are you oka-?" Hinata was halted by more sobs.

"WHYYYYYYYY?! I SHALL AVENGE YOU HERBERT! YOU AND YOUR SEVENTY BILLION CHILDREN!" Kiba snapped out of his trance to comment on the last statement.

"Okay, that's just fucked up."

"WHAT DID I DO TO DESERVE THIS?!" They backed away slowly from their 'allegedly' insane team member. Shino had totally lost it.

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A few hundred meters away, Hinata and Kiba were pondering the sanity of their creepy-but talented- teammate.

"That had to be the weirdest thing I think I've ever seen in my entire life." Kiba said as his eyes were still like saucers.

"I still might have to bake that cake for him…" Hinata said aloud. Kiba immediately had a thought. One that was just crazy enough to work.

"Hinata…you know how everyone at the academy thinks Shino is well…borderline emo, right?" She nodded.

"Well, if we tell them about his little 'break-down', then we can tarnish his reputation, right?" She nodded hesitantly.

"Well, we can use this as blackmail to get Shino to do that thing!" She smiled slightly.

"Yeah, but…well…alright. I'll make some muffins for him as an apology."

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Shino Aburame had given 'Herbert' a proper funeral as his favorite bug had been murdered. Shino heard footsteps on the ground. And they belonged to Kiba and Hinata.

"Oiy, Shino! We've got a proposal for ya!" The person he really didn't want to see right now, just had to show up.

"What do you want, Inuzuka?" Shino said bitterly.

"Well, we finally figured out how we can get you to do it!" When Shino heard out their proposition, he sighed in utter defeat.

"When is it?"

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It was eight o' clock at the talent show, and everyone in Konoha (and the Sand Sibs) came.

It was the biggest. Event. EVER.

Shino peeked from behind the stage, just to see how many people there were, and sighed.

"Can I at least have a bag over my head, so nobody recognizes me?" Kiba smiled at him, and put a giant black bag with a question mark over his head.

"Kiba, I really hate you right now."

"Wasn't our fault."

"Yes, yes it was."

"Oh, well…whatever. Get prepared! You're on in thirty seconds!" Kiba said, when the overhead announcer stated a musical performance would be next.

"Come on Kiba, I really don't want to do this."

"Nonsense! Now go out and sing your heart out!" Shino begrudgingly slumped to the stage in an extremely flamboyant white Elvis-esque outfit, with a pink feather boa and white matching cowboy boots.

Making his way up to the microphone, he thought of every idea he could to get back at Kiba.

Nevertheless, he spoke into the microphone and said:

"Hi. I'll be singing 'She bangs' by Ricky Martin."

And so, Shino let go every shred of dignity he ever had.

-Fin-

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Ice: I love Shino, I really do. He is my FAVORITE character to torture.

I had to think of a really stupid song for him to sing, and I don't like that song. I was GOING to make him sing 'The hamster dance' but that song PWNZ. And the outfit…I think I went a wee bit too far on the outfit. And I didn't add the -kun or -san suffiz because...well...I'm not smart enough to know which is which and what is what.

Alas, R&R, flame, whatever.

Ciao.