Writers Notes: I tried my best thats all i can say... personally i dont think i did too well, but you get the gist of what happens. I also wrote it as a tribute to one of my mums friends who had a car accident and had a herniated disk, so i hope i did it well. Pleas review... Oh and I dont own anything, anyone.. nothing... No Copyright intended :) ENJOY
Summary: Claire is holding onto the last treads of life as Alex finds her, in the mangled mess of the Ute. But that joy of finding his beloved is soon turned to overwhelming dread, Claire can't feel her legs. When she's diagnosed with a herniated disc and is temporality disable the woman and men of Drovers Run have to mould to this new life as she recovers. When stress levels hit a high between Alex and Claire they break up, leaving each other with the burden of guilt. Will Alex finally get to propose to the love of his life? Will Claire ever get over the trauma of the horrific accident? Will they find the remedies needed to get the people of Drovers Run to breathe a sigh of relief?
Rating: M (Course language, Sexual References, Drug use and Adult Themes)
Alex Ryan's breath got caught in his throat as he lurched out of the Ute, the wind whistled in his ears as he looked over the ledge his beloved Claire had just cascaded down in the Ute. The old metal torn, twisted and mangled as if some mechanical being,
"Claire!" he yelled as Nick, Terry, Jodi and Tess arrived next to him, there was no answer just the loud breaths of those behind him. He jolted as he ran back to his Ute; his brother Nick tightened a course rope to the back of the Ute. His legs felt weak from under him, his heart almost at a standstill, his breathing, he wasn't he held his breath as he jumped from the ledge, down, down and down he didn't even hear Nick's cry of safety to 'take it easy'. His hands were bleeding now, but he clenched them as his feet hit the ground, getting his footing he ran to the mangled mess, the air was heavy with petrol and smoke. Alex stopped his breath getting caught again as he stared at the motionless body of Claire, the love of his life, the happiness to his life. Her body was rigid, her hair dishevelled, her clothes filthy from the dust and debris,
"Claire," he breathed it was barely audible as he cupped her face, it was pale and streaked with blood, "Claire," he sobbed grimacing at the sight,
"Alex," Claire swallowed, Alex froze for a second, his frown increased. Not know if he had just heard that in his head. He watched as Claire's face grimaced, he blinked not believing what he had just witnessed; a long exhale was heard as Claire eyes fluttered,
"Claire?" he asked again louder cupping her face tightly as she tried her best to open those gorgeous eyes of hers,
"Alex," she whispered as her eyes lay on his, a small smile spread on his face,
"She's alright!" He yelled to the others, who watched and waited, they were speechless,
"Alex," Claire swallowed hard again, "Alex my legs," she frowned as her breathing became short and sharp,
"Call the Ambulance!" Alex yelled as the other watched in disbelief, but they soon hurried into action, calling not only the local ambulance but the hospital helicopter rescue, she'd have to be air lifted for sure,
"Alex my legs," Claire sighed louder as she struggled to keep her eyes open,
"It's alright Claire, I'm here. The ambulance is coming," Alex soothed stroking her face as she grew paler,
"Alex my legs!" she yelled as loud as she could, a tear falling for her eye, she groaned in pain. Her head felt as if it was on fire, but her legs felt nothing, nothing at all. Alex looked down, one of her legs were cut quiet severely and was bleeding heavily,
"What's wrong?" he asked as she began to panic,
"I can't," she sobbed, "I can't feel them," she cried, as Alex searched for words, the pit of his stomach felt as it had been hit,
"It's alright Claire," he said hiding the panic he felt, but Claire could see it in his eyes, this wasn't good at all,
"Nick where's the bloody ambulance!" Alex yelled his voice booming through the tree's,
"It's coming!" Nick answered just as worried,
"She can't feel her bloody legs!" he called back, Nick's frown turned to an expression of shock, he looked back at Tess,
"Why can't she feel her legs?" Tess asked, panic arising quickly in her voice,
"Alex leave me," Claire wheezed,
"You're alright," he answered as he knelt watching the woman he was meant to propose to only hours from now. He watched as Claire's breathing began to become delayed,
"Claire?" he soothed, she didn't answer. A shot of dread hit him, "Claire?" he asked louder this time all the while keeping her neck supported,
"Let me go Alex," she demanded in a weak voice,
"No the ambulance," Alex reassured in thready voice, he not only heard but he felt her breathing coming even more delayed,
"Claire stay for Charlotte," Alex grimaced as he stood up, his knee's aching from the gravel,
"Charlotte," she repeated as her eyes fluttered again, Alex watched as tear threaten the fall from his eye,
"You can't go Claire I've got a surprise," Alex said as a bribe he didn't want to lose the woman he had loved his whole life, he felt her pain, every groan and grimace he felt, she was a part of him, he couldn't lose her,
"Surprise," She repeated as she closed her eyes, she couldn't keep them open anymore. Her head was pounding. She couldn't feel her legs, she didn't want to live like that, she wanted to go, she wanted the pain to be over, to be free…
Alex sat slumped on the hospital chair in the hallway with Charlotte in his arms, his nose burnt from the thick smell of disinfectant, almost making him physically sick, but slowly he witnessed the people surrounding him, Meg, Jodi, Tess and Nick all drift off to sleep he had drifted off a few times, but every click-clack of a nurses shoes woke him up. Praying that after a restless night and morning one of them would take him to his beloved, 10 hours all up. His eyes welled up momentarily as he swallowed hard. He furrowed his brow not knowing whether he could live with Claire disable, he stopped for a second. Now he was questioning his love her, this wasn't right, he was so confused all he wanted to do was see her beaming face walking through the driveway back at Drover's Run, followed by the proposal and a night of unforgettable love, but his world had been shattered around him.
"Hi I'm Natasha, are you all here for Miss McLeod?" a nurse asked snapping Alex from his whirlwind of thoughts, he jumped to his feet waking Charlotte, the others too scrambling to life,
"How is she?" Alex asked breathless as the others surrounded him, listening intently,
"Well Miss McLeod, his sustained a herniated disc, concussion and loss of a lot of blood on her leg," the group frowned,
"Herniated disc?" Alex question his face full of confusion,
"With the extreme force from the crash, she has broken a disc in her back, causing it to push against the nerve endings, leaving her temporarily disable," Natasha answered reading line for line the report,
"What so she can walk?" Tess asked butting in,
"Well not at the moment, you see we've put her on an eight hour drip of steroids to build her muscles around her spine, then once her concussion clears the surgery will begin and after rehab she will return to her old self," Natasha smiled happy to give some good news for once,
"What surgery?" Meg asked as the group still stood rooted to the ground eager for all the ins and outs,
"A basic three metal plates and three screws will have to be inserted, she very lucky," Natasha said as she looked at the faces of each person, so caring, they all seemed scared out of there mind. The group all nodded happy, Claire would be able to walk, but they still had that worry all of them had to see for themselves,
"Can we see her?" Alex asked as Charlotte began to grizzle,
"Yes of course! But first if you don't mind me asking are one of you Miss McLeod's partner?" Natasha asked her face changing to a serious glare at Nick and Alex,
"Yeah, I'am," Alex nodded frowning,
"I'd like to see you and Claire together, there something I need to discuss with you both," Natasha answered as Charlotte began to grizzle louder, threatening to erupt in a loud cry. The group looked at Alex, as he frowned. What could possible need discussing? His thoughts were interrupted by Charlotte's deafening cry,
"Here take Charlotte," Alex sighed to Nick as Natasha began to walk down the hall, but she stopped abruptly,
"No please bring the baby," Natasha said signalling for them to hurry. Alex took hold of Charlotte as her cried went back to a whine. Alex never realised how far away he was from Claire's room, the halls seemed to go on forever. Filled with elderly and injured, it seemed to rub salt into his wound as Natasha led him through the trauma ward,
"What's there to discuss?" he asked as Charlotte chewed and sucked on the collar of his jacket,
I'll tell you in a minute Mr McLeod," Natasha said as they passed another row of rooms, Alex tensed a bit,
"It's actually Alex Ryan," he answered as they stopped at a door. Natasha apologised over and over again, but Alex didn't register, he was transfixed on a bed at the end of the room. The door opened slowly, the creaking making Charlotte toey, she was in a strange different place, it didn't feel safe to her. Alex was frozen as he stared at Claire, but he was shook from his trance as Natasha ushered him into the room, he walked not daring to look away from Claire, she looked so uncomfortable she was braced tightly to a board and her neck in a brace not to mention the endless cords and drip's she had attached, she opened her eyes and looked directly at him as he arrived by her bedside,
"I'll give you some time," Natasha smiled before leaving promptly,
"Alex," Claire smiled half-heartedly, Alex smiled back his heart filling with joy as he clutched at Claire hand and squeezed it,
"Are you alright?" Alex asked sitting Charlotte on his leg as Claire watched her, to poor thing was obviously distressed and Claire couldn't blame her,
"Alright, my head is killing me," Claire answered, "They said I had some brain swelling, but it's gone down," Claire added weakly, as Charlotte rested her hand on hers and Alex's. Claire grimaced,
"I'm so sorry Alex," she said tearful, Alex looked at her shocked. Why on earth was she apologising? It was an accident,
"It's fine Claire, really," he soothed before leaning over to kiss Claire's lips, although they were dry, he cherished the feeling of them, it really hit home she was actually alive. Natasha walked in as Alex wiping a tear from Claire's cheek. Both Alex and Claire looked at her expectedly as she stood with the file in her hands,
"Sorry to interrupt," She smiled, "but there's something I need you both to know," Natasha added leaning against the foot of the bed. Alex and Claire hadn't lost sight of her, eying her down,
"I'll cut straight to the chase," she exclaimed clearing her throat, as Alex nodded eagerly, "During your surgery, rehab and sometime after your rehab, due to your paralyse you will have lost your sexual function's," Natasha stated looking to her file, to ignore the confused looks she got,
"My what?" Claire asked rudely,
"Your sexual function's, your ability to become aroused during intercourse etc.," Claire looked at Natasha disgusted before looking at Alex frowning. He looked at her worried,
"It will come back though yeah?" Alex asked looking back to Natasha as Claire looked away, dejecting herself from this conversation. She was never into talking about anything as private as that, it was embarrassing to be quiet frank!
"Yes of course, but while the muscles are weakened no. All patients heel in their own time, so Claire you'll be the judge," Natasha smiled as Claire let go of Alex's hand crossing it against her stomach. Alex turned his attention to her, he looked at her slightly hurt, but he soon saw a tear escape. He tried desperately to clutch her hand again to give her so comfort but she pulled away.
"Can I see my sister?" Claire asked still her head was turned away as best she could from Alex, he cowered his head in defeat as he carried Charlotte and himself out of the room,
"Claire it will come back, there is nothing to worry about," Natasha explained tilting her head to try and look Claire in the eye. Claire glared at her for a split second before turning her face as best she could in the neck brace to face the window. Watching the tree's that swayed gently in the breeze, the bird's fighting in the summer spring sun. Natasha had left by the time Tess has arrived. Although Tess pressured Claire why Alex was so upset she never told her, it was embarrassing. She didn't want the whole world to know, why did the nurse have to say it to Alex of all people, they are partners, well were partners. Claire wasn't sure if she could ever be intimate again, the worry was too much. With her constant worries it didn't take long for her to exhauster herself out and fall back asleep, tomorrow she would undergo her surgery, but not before she could see her baby girl and Tess, not so much Alex.
Claire stared up at the ceiling in the preparation room, she could see through the window opposite her bed as the doctor's hustled and busted around the instruments, unnerving her more. Lucky her thoughts where interrupted by Tess and Charlotte, Claire smiled at Charlotte who reached out to her, desperate for a cuddle with her mum, desperate for a proper feed of breast milk, not bottled. She cried a little until Claire held her tiny little hand,
"You nervous?" Tess asked smiling as Charlotte gurgled clutching onto her mum's hand,
"Very," Claire answered grimacing as she saw Alex come into the room,
"Hey," he smiled replacing Tess' spot. Claire smiled at him graciously, he was the last person she wanted to see it was so humiliating! Just as Alex kissed her forehead a short stubby nurse came along, although she looked rugged she had a warm smile, all the while relaxing Claire a little,
"They're ready," she smiled to Claire before exchanging quick glances at Tess, Alex and last of Charlotte, she beamed, "Is that your daughter?" she asked grabbing Charlottes little hand as she reached out,
"Yep," Claire answered smiling, she was so proud of her daughter, every day she would grow into a healthy happy baby. Alex watched Claire although she took no notice of him, he still couldn't find a reason why.
"She's gorgeous, you'll be able to hold her soon," the nurse exclaimed as the head doctor came out, he smiled graciously at the group. After a heartbreaking goodbye Tess and Alex watched as she was wheeled into the room, transported onto the operating bed and then put to sleep before they were promptly taken to the waiting lounge.
It had been over 3 hours since Alex and Tess had last seen Claire. Tess ' stomach was churning inside, what if something happened on the operating table, what if she lost her sister forever. Luckily Nick had a comforting hand around her shoulder, soothing words always at the ready when he felt Tess slump or tremor with tears. Alex had kept BOM busy, playing with the little dog he gave her in Melbourne, reading a book, telling her a story and now he had resulted in bouncing her on his knee, humming in her ears, but it didn't help the look of distress on her face. She wasn't settling with formula, she wanted that one on one bonding with Claire, and so she could finally feel safe. Natasha walked out wiping her hands thoroughly with disinfectant as she arrived near Alex and BOM, who stood up with Tess and Nick,
"Is she okay?" Tess asked straight off the bat, Natasha smiled nodding,
"Claire has pulled through wonderfully. Most of the anaesthetic is still wearing off now," Natasha answered playing with Charlotte's incisive hand,
"Can we see her?" Alex asked, although Claire had been ignoring him, he had put it down to the stress of the operation, or not walking and being independent like Claire always was,
"No, not right know, she'll need to rest until morning, so you'll probably have to stay another night if you'd like to see her," the nurse answered with a disappointed look, she could tell how supporting they all where. The group nodded agreeing to stay until they saw Claire walk. Nick took out his SAT phone and dialled the Drover's phone. Meg and Jodi had gone back to Gungellan to look after the farm,
"Meg speaking?" she answered eager to find out if Claire was alright,
"Meg, its Nick,"
"How is she?" Meg asked almost cutting Nick off,
"She's great, they've finished the op, it went perfectly, but where staying another night. Do you think Jodi and Stevie could check Wilgul?" Nick asked, Meg stood ecstatic Claire came through okay, she was like a surrogate mother to Claire and wouldn't know what to do with herself if she ever witnessed her, Jodi or even Tess' untimely death,
"Yeah sure no problem's, tell Claire everything's under control and that we said hi," Meg smiled as Stevie and Jodi came in and listened to the conversation. Guessing it was something to do with Claire, the phone never stopped since word got out,
"Thanks, talk to you tomorrow, Bye," Nick said as Tess fell into him, she was exhausted and had a headache from the hustle and bustle of the city, she much preferred the country now,
"Bye," Meg exclaimed elated before putting the phone down, eager to tell Jodi and Stevie the news. Nick wrapped his arm around Tess as they walked back to the hotel it wasn't far from the hospital. Alex followed far behind with Charlotte in the pram; she was hungry, tired and agitated with the continuous noise.
3 Days had passed since the operation. Claire had bribed Tess, Nick and Alex too go home for the three days, but Alex never budged. Tess and Nick though followed her orders but where back today in a flash. Tess followed Nick and Alex as he wheeled Claire into the physician's office. Claire was elated she could sit up and hold her baby Charlotte. She hadn't though been too happy about Alex wheeling her around, she wanted Tess to do it, but the nurses insisted Alex do it. Dr Proudman welcomed them in warmly.
"Claire I'd like you to sit up here please," the doctor said tapping his bench, "Would you two gentlemen like to help the lady," The Dr asked with a smirk as he looked at Nick and Alex. Claire glared at the old man; she didn't want Alex's hands near her at all!
"Nick," she suggested looking up at him, but he shook his head, it was too risky with his leg and the obstacles. Alex smiled he had missed touching Claire; although this was not in an intimate way, at least it was something. Claire tensed as she felt Alex's hand slip between the back of her knee's the other on her back, she was soon transported to the bench.
"Right Alex is it?" the old doctor asked with a raised eyebrow at Alex, who nodded, "I'd like you too support her back, just as I check everything," he smiled. Claire pouted slightly, they had to be doing this on purpose just too piss her off, she though as Dr. Proudman took her foot in his hand, her eye's widened, she actually felt something. Going through the motions he pulled her foot up to stretch the muscles, Claire frowned,
"It's pulling," she sighed as he released her foot with a smile and proceeded with the other foot,
"That's very good, since having the operation you got the feeling back slightly?" he questioned, Claire nodded hopeful,
"That's great, it means the nerve endings from the steroids have fused back together, all you need now is the rehab, then you'll be back to riding all those horses you told me about," Dr Proudman smiled, Claire smiled back at him before Tess ran over and hugged her. Wrapped up in the excitement Claire didn't see Alex as he gently kissed her head, but she soon pulled away a little. Alex sighed defeated he couldn't win and he didn't know what he did wrong.
Alex inhaled the polluted air as he sipped at his coffee, Claire never once leaving his thoughts,
"Alex?" Tess questioned, breaking him from his thoughts. He turned and smile at her half-heartedly, Claire still weighing heavy on his mind, "is everything okay?" Tess asked as she followed his gaze to the city floor,
"Yeah," he sighed taking another sip of hot liquid, but it didn't seem to burn, he was numb to it. Claire had made him numb to the bone,
"You and Claire okay?" Tess asked lightly, she didn't want to sound so bashful at a time like this, Alex shook his head and sighed,
"I dunno,"
"Why? Have you two had a fight?" she asked again lightly. She had witnessed the tension between the two ever since the diagnostic for Claire, something had to be up,
"No, She's just ignoring me," Alex shrugged as he took the last mouthful of his coffee and lent back in his chair,
"She's been quiet with everyone, I'm sure there's nothing to worry about," Tess smiled as she too lent back and watched as the traffic slowed and the sky slowly became darker by the second,
"But everything was perfect I was gonna.." Alex paused mid-sentence with a look of complete horror, Tess frowned, "I left the ring on the bed," he exclaimed as he stood up and almost ran into the flat. Tess sat frowning into thin air, a ring, bed? What's that got to do with Claire being quiet? Tess took her attention back to the City street, meanwhile Alex scurried into the lounge room where Nick sat half asleep,
"Nick?" he called out, Nick awoke startled by the tone Alex used,
"What is it?" he asked rubbing his eyes,
" I need the SAT phone," Alex exclaimed holding his hand out impatiently,
"Here," Nick sighed dropping it in his hand. Tess walked in just as Alex walked into the bedroom. She frowned at Nick who shrugged.
"Meg its Alex," Alex stated pacing back and forth,
"Alex is something wrong? Is Claire okay?" Meg asked in a panic due to Alex's tone,
"Claire's fine, I need you to do something,"
"Oh okay,
"I need you to get something from Claire's bedroom, don't tell anyone though," Alex stated almost in a whisper, Nick was the only one who knew and he'd rather it stay like that,
"Okay," Meg asked slightly confused,
"Thank you, I'll talk to you tomorrow?" Alex asked as a reassurance,
"Yeah, sure,"
Bye," Alex exclaimed before quickly ending the call, to return to the lounge room where Tess and Nick were with Charlotte who had just woken up,
"Alex what's going on?" Nick asked as Alex handed the phone back to him, he just shook his head before leaving to the balcony again.
MONTH LATER
Tess stood impatiently waiting at the office desk, Alex behind with Charlotte. It had been a month of tireless trips to the city to see Claire; she had achieved so much in such a small amount of time and was now able to go home. Alex had become distant for most of the month, but today you couldn't wipe the smile off his face, his Claire was coming home. Hopefully she'd come back to her old self, he'd propose and life would be perfect again,
"Make your way through," the receptionist smiled. Tess and Alex walked as fast as they possible could to Claire's room, room 73. Claire sat up waiting, ready to go home. Natasha soon followed Tess and Alex into her room,
"So can I go home?" Claire asked placing a ready hand on her suitcase,
"Not just yet," Natasha smiled, she'd gotten a kick out of Claire and her black and white ways. Claire pouted before taking Charlotte from Alex, rather hastily. She felt her back splinter with pain, but she put up with it just to hold her baby BOM, who had grown so much in such a small amount of time,
"Now Claire we're just going to run through everything for your sister and Alex," Natasha exclaimed clearing her throat mid-sentence, "To start with, your cortisone injections you've been getting," Natasha started as Claire grimaced at the pain in her back, "We'll give you another one now and then one every month until further notice, so if you want to lay down and roll over," Natasha stated as she drew a needle almost as big as her hand, Tess looked horrified at it, just looking at it made her queasy. Alex grabbed Charlotte off Claire as she rolled onto her side. Natasha lifted her singlet up, now Tess and Alex could see Claire's scar for the first time. It was at least six centimetres in length and one centimetre in width, it looked terribly painful. Alex on the other hand looked at it almost in sorrow, he so desperately missed being close to Claire holding her, feeling her skin beneath his fingers, the lust was even more due to Claire's weaning of Charlotte, her breasts obviously had gone up at least two sized due to it. It was almost rubbing salt into his wounds, "When the needle is injected we situate it around here," Claire heard Natasha say as she poked the area on the back and soon felt the needle enter. She groaned, grimacing it hurt more than anything but thankfully it was over in ten seconds, she rolled back over to witness Tess' pale face, she smiled at her amused. Catching a glimpse she noticed the sad look in Alex's eyes, she looked away quickly, not dwelling on that, she just wanted to go home, "Also I'm prescribing you some tablets to dry the excess milk, some of the nurses have told me, you've been complaining of breast soreness?" Natasha enquired, Claire sunk into her pillow, another private matter addressed to the whole world, she sigh as she nodded, "Also Tess, Alex Claire's been suffering from quiet bad nightmares, of the accident," Natasha went on but again Claire rolled her eyes, if she didn't feel weak enough as it is,
"I'm fine there gone," she exclaimed crossing her arms rather angrily, causing her back to erupt in a sharp pain, it was like walking on egg shells. Natasha looked at Claire with annoyance, she knew she was still having the dreams, she had one only this morning,
"We'll take good care of her, don't worry," Tess smiled broadly, so happy she could finally have her sister back,
"Two other things, horse riding," Natasha started giving Claire one of her serious doctor looks, "Claire you realise if you fall off, you could become permanently disabled?" she asked raising an eyebrow, Claire nodded agitated, she'd gone through this talk millions of times, "And last all of your issued with sexual functions," Claire frowned she hadn't been through this talk millions of times and she liked it that way, it was so degrading, "You'll be the judge," Natasha smiled as she glanced from Alex to Claire. Alex smiled back it was a cheeky smile, Claire knew exactly what that smile was and she didn't like it one bit,
"Can I go now?" She asked as she groaned and grimaced sitting up, Natasha nodded smiling. Soon Tess and Alex had collected Claire things and were back off to Gungellan.
Claire swallowed hard, she shifted her weight painfully. Her back ached so much, the gravel roads weren't exactly the smoothest, she tried has to swallow the nausea that swirled around her body, as did the pain,
"You okay Claire?" Tess asked as she witnessed her sister go pale, Claire shook her head as another nauseated wave hit her,
"Stop!" She screeched Alex slammed his foot on the brake, probably not the best thing to do as Claire yelled in pain before opening the front door and threw up; the pain had gotten too much. Tess scrambled for the back of the Merc to Claire side,
"I think we should take you back Claire," Tess said tucking the loose strands of hair behind Claire ear,
"I'm fine, " she coughed, gritting her teeth, she clutched at her back harshly, before throwing up again. Tess and Alex looked on with worried expression,
"Claire were taking you back," Tess said rubbing Claire's back gently,
"No, it's fine Tess," Claire sighed leaning back into the car gently,
"Your backs really bad, You could have hurt it," Tess said belting Claire up and shutting the door,
"I'm going home!" Claire yelled as loud as she could with the pain that over run her body. Alex and Tess both exchanged worried looks before continuing home, they knew better then to argue with that tone. Alex felt the tension in the air as he drove, this was the first time Claire had gotten into a car since the accident and he was sure if she wasn't so sick, she'd be telling him to watch every corner and slow down. He glanced to her, his eye unwillingly resting onto her chest; he turned directly back to the road. He couldn't help the way he felt after all he was human! With Claire heavy in his thoughts, the thoughts of absolute pain in Claire's and worry in Tess' it didn't take long for them to reach Drovers. Claire was so over run with pain she didn't notice, she didn't even notice Alex pick her up slowly and take her into her bedroom. Without exchanging a word he left but not before he kissed her lips, while she fell into an exhausted sleep.
It was around five when Claire awoke from her sleep, her back felt fantastic compared too four hours ago, thank god for cortisone she smiled as she slowly and painfully made her way down the stairs step by step. Meg was too caught up in the conversation she had with Alex only an hour ago. When she handed the ring to Alex, the ring she found on Claire's pillow, how could life be so unpredictable? She questioned before looking up surprised,
"Oh Claire, your awake," Meg exclaimed with a hint of fright, "How's your back?" she added walking up to Claire with a wide smile plastered on her face,
"It's much better," Claire smiled as she hugged Meg gently,
"Good," she replied ushering Claire into the kitchen, "Tess, Jodi and Stevie have all gone to check the alpaca's," Meg exclaimed as she handed Claire a cup of coffee. Claire nodded as she took a sip of her coffee,
"Where's Charlotte?" Claire asked leaning against the chair, she was still tired, but then again she was back home and that's all that mattered, she had work to do!
"She's sleeping," Meg answered as they heard the chatter of Tess, Jodi and Stevie before they entered the kitchen,
"Claire, are you okay?" Tess asked rushing over to her as soon as she saw her,
"I'm fine," she answered before exchanging long awaited welcomes from Stevie and even Jodi,
"Would you like anything?" Stevie asked being the doting friend,
"Can I go for a ride?" Claire asked with a glint in her eye, oh how she missed riding. The feeling of being weightless and free,
"Yeah, sure…"
"No!" Tess exclaimed interrupting Stevie mid-sentence. Claire turned to her with an expression of anger, "The doctor said if you fall, you could being permanently disabled," Tess went on all the time getting 'the look of love' from Claire,
"Tess I'm riding!" Claire said defiantly as Meg, Jodi and Stevie all seemed to fade away. Tess took a deep breath to erupt in a comeback but luckily Alex walked in,
"You two fighting already?" he chuckled, reluctantly taking his eyes away from Claire,
"Yes," Tess yelled,
"No," Claire exclaimed crossing her arms defiantly,
"What's the problem?" he asked still chuckling to himself,
"I want to go for a ride!" Claire exclaimed,
"I told her it's too dangerous!" Tess argued as she too crossed her arms across her chest. Alex looked at Claire, how could he not, he smiled,
"I'll take you Claire," he said turning to exit the door, "Come on," he smiled. Claire got up as fast as she could a wide smile spread across her face. Tess sat be-wildered Alex would actually let Claire ride,
"She'll be alright, Alex will look after her," Stevie said placing a reassuring hand on Tess' shoulder.
"You right?" Alex asked as Claire adjusted her jeans to get on Eagle,
"Yes," she hissed, that had to be the twentieth time he'd asked that. She tried desperately to get her foot into the stirrup, but her back strained with so much pain, she groaned as she walked around in a tight circle, obviously pissed off she couldn't get up,
"Here lift your arms up," Alex said walking over to her but she frowned,
"Why?" she asked taking a step away from him and questioning look heavy on her face,
"I'll lift you up," Alex said cocking his head towards Eagle, who stood patiently waiting for Claire, like a good boy,
"NO way! I'm getting up myself," Claire said defiantly, Alex sighed shaking his head and watched again as she struggled to get up, he'd had enough, this was getting monotonous. He walked behind her and grasped her by the waist and lifted her up easily, she stiffened at his touch but at least she was finally up, she smiled triumphantly as she adjusted her pants. Alex held onto the saddle and was just about to vault onto Eagles back behind Claire, when she stopped him,
"What are you doing?" she asked frowning down to him,
"Getting on with you," Alex answered in a matter of fact tone, too which Claire frowned even more,
"No, I'm fine," she said about to kick Eagle onto a walk, but Alex was one step ahead and while Claire was having a dummy spit, he vaulted onto Eagles back. He felt his heart rate immediately fasten when he took his hands to hold onto the front of the saddle. Claire wanted to abuse him, but she was so tense, she didn't dare move with Alex's arms around her, she tried to relax and concentrate on something she felt deep inside her, a burning desire…it couldn't be, she smiled as she felt her heart rate accelerate, it was…..she was becoming aroused as stupid as it sounded, she could have jumped with glee. After kicking Eagle into a walk, they walked around and around the round yard; Alex enjoyed being this close to Claire, maybe a little too much. He and Claire were both getting a secret thrill out of it. The ride was silent either party not daring to talk or move, but that was stopped when Alex scooted closer to Claire resting his chin on her shoulder, still tense Claire allowed it, she wanted to test how far she could get, with the whole arousement thing. She wasn't a very sexual person but a month without any had almost driven her crazy. Claire soon clutched at her back, it was erupting in a pain so unmentionable,
"You right?" Alex asked for now the one hundredth time. Claire shook her head, holding in the tears. She hadn't told anyone yet, but the pain was so excruciating it made her cry on rare events. Alex jumped off holding his arms out, he carefully lifted Claire off Eagle she accepted his help reluctantly. Alex smiled as he gently placed her in front of him. Claire looked up sensing Alex was staring at her, she still had that undying desire, so was captivated and could look away, she wanted too, but couldn't,
"Thank you," she smiled still looking into his eyes,
"Don't mention it," he said smiling right back at her as he took his arm around Claire, she froze, what if she still couldn't sleep with him. What if it was a total disaster, by all means she wanted to sleep with him, she yearned for that kind of touch, but what if it was horrible and he never talked to her again. She pulled away quickly, Alex looked at her confused,
"Thanks," she waved as she hurried back to the house, leaving Alex hot under the collar for Claire, confused and left to unsaddle Eagle.
"Claire?" Tess called from behind the closed bedroom door. There was no reply, she peeked around the door. Claire had definitely started to shut down, especially after she went riding. God knows what happened between Claire and Alex at the hospital that first day, they saw her. The tension between the two was so sharp and jiggered. "Claire?" she called again seeing that she wasn't in her room,
"Yeah,"
"Where are you?" Tess asked walking into the dark room,
"On the veranda," Claire answered breathing deeply, the air of Drovers was magic. Tess made her way out onto the turret, where Claire stood overlooking the beautiful land they owner,
"You okay?" Tess asked putting a comforting hand on Claire's back, she nodded, but Tess could see the look of exhaustion and stress clearly set on her face,
"How'd your ride go?"
"Yeah good," Claire said with an obvious fake smile, she still couldn't get the feeling of having Alex that close to her, but then the regret and guilt would set it, a hurricane of emotions.
"What about you an Alex?" Tess pried,
"Yeah he was helpful,"
"I thought it would be a bit weird, you know," Tess said smiling to herself quietly, Claire looked to her frowning, but the look of Tess's face told Claire she knew,
"It was," she admitted, bowing her head slightly, Tess nodded with exaggeration,
"What actually happened?" she asked pulling her night gown around her, Claire hesitated for a second, "It's not about that thing Natasha said is it?" Tess added,
"Thing?" Claire frowned, she knew exactly what Tess meant, but just need to check first,
"About the whole arousement thing," Tess said awkwardly, Claire nodded slightly,
"I just don't want to let him down," Claire blurted out, distressed. Tess was taken back slightly but reassured her with a hug,
"Alex loves you Claire, you would never let him down, trust me," Tess said looking directly into Claire's eyes,
"How do you know?"
"Alex's worried about you, he told me, while you were in hospital still," Claire looked at Tess hopefully; Tess smiled back as a reassurance before they hugged again,
"Right well, I'm going to bed," Tess smiled, her eyes felt heavy for sleep,
"Oh, okay," Claire said reluctantly,
"Everything else okay?" Tess frowned at Claire's tone, Claire sighed loudly,
"Nightmares," she said curling her lip up,
"Oh, the accident?"
"Yeah, it's like a flash back, staring down the cliff, then the feeling of falling, that gut feeling," Claire said holding her stomach, the dreams felt so real, reliving the horror that went on almost three months ago, every time she closed her eyes,
"We have to go to, Dr. Proudman in two days, maybe we could ask for sleeping pill or something," Tess explained ushering Claire into her bedroom, before saying the goodnights and turning off for the night.
Claire walked down through the horse yards easily, her back healing day by day. She was soon confronted by Alex and Nick, she jumped back in fright,
"Hey Claire, you seen Tess around?" Nick asked casually,
"Yeah she's in the shearing shed," Claire answered hoping Alex would follow Nick to the shed, but no. He stood there staring at her perfect hair, perfect eyes and not to mention her breast, he smirked, before feeling quiet awkward,
"How are you?" he asked quietly,
"Good," Claire answered quickly and sharply. Alex shifted his weight anxiously, so too did Claire,
"You wanna go for another ride?" Alex asked to interrupt the silence. Claire looked at him with absolute glee, her eyes wide and a smile that would light the darkest of places, Alex fell weak at the knees. He chuckled before they both walked to the stables and saddled Eagle up. Alex again lifted Claire high onto Eagles back, her muscles still not strong enough to lift her weight. As Claire sat astride Eagle she smiled down to Alex,
"I'm sorry," she stated as he heaved himself onto Eagles back, behind Claire. He moved closer to her his hands encircling her waist again; she smiled as she relaxed into his chest. Eagles sensed there was no more tension on his back, causing the ride to be smooth.
"Oi Alex!" Nick called as he limped his way over to the round yard, they both pulled Eagle up and looked at him with a slight tinge of anger, for interrupting there time, "Tess was thinking we should go to dam, seen as it so hot," Nick suggested as Tess came wandering up behind him with a smile,
"I dunno," Claire frowned, she had to admit it was almost to a boiling point in the sun, but she was weary of her back,
"I'll be good for your back," Alex added resting his hand on her thigh, giving her a shock of adrenaline and arousement,
"Sounds good then," she answered, too busy to think about anything but Alex's hand on her thigh. Nick and Tess waked back to the house as Claire and Alex set off for the dam on Eagle. Alex still resting his hand on Claire's thigh, the past problems and fights were over and done, this was now. He smiled wrapping his other arm around her stomach, she placed her hand on Alex's which rested nicely on her stomach. The ride didn't take long; all the while the two shared secret moments which they both knew made then both hotter by the minute. Finally they met Nick, Tess, Jodi, Stevie and Meg down at the dam and in no time were stripped down to their underwear and peacefully swimming in the dam. Tess swam with Nick to the middle of the dam as they re-surfaced they witnessed Alex's slowly walk Claire into the water, holding her steady in the slippery mud,
"Looks like those two made up," Nick said as he watched Claire slip directly into Alex's arms as if on cue,
"Yeah about time," Tess smiled hearing her sisters loud laugh, "I get one brother and Claire gets the other," Tess smiled before kissing Nick quickly, little did everyone know that they had started a budding romance while in Melbourne. Alex swam backwards, Claire let go of his hand as she swam up to him a look of relief on her face,
"This is great, "she smiled wiping the wet strands of hair free from her face,
"Sure is," Alex replied as they watched Jodi with Charlotte. Watching as she played with her. Claire couldn't help but giggle at how funny Charlotte looked in her floaties. Her giggled soon became a full blown laugh, almost to the point where she was struggling to keep afloat. Alex laughed at her before pulling her up, giving her some relief. Claire finished her laughing fit with a sigh, looking deep into Alex's eyes. That's was when he quickly stole a kiss from her, not wanting her to pull away again. Claire felt the heat rise within her, she wanted Alex desperately. After stealing yet another peck, she wrapper her legs around his waist roughly, it took him by surprise, but he kissed her again and again more passion filling both of them,
"Alex," Claire sighed her ran his hands under her shirt,
"What?" he asked pre-occupied, Claire felt herself throb with excitement, from feeling Alex's excitement from under her,
"I forgot something," She exclaimed ignoring the rest of the world,
"What?" Alex asked kissing her collar bone roughly,
"Come with me," she breathed as they reluctantly parted and made their way to the shore. Tess and Nick had been too busy in themselves to notice Claire and Alex's public displays to see, same with Jodi, Stevie and Meg,
"I have to go check something, I'll be back in a couple of minutes," Claire stated to Meg who frowned at them,
"I'll drive her," Alex smiled doing his best to sound like a gentleman and not someone who was frothing at the mouth to get into Claire's pants. Meg nodded and let them do, they should be so lucky, she had no bathers and wasn't risking going in her underwear, so she had to brave the heat and keep watch.
…..Once at the homestead not wasting time the too now in a total haze of passion shuffled together, Alex's lips firmly planted on Claire's as they fumbled to the stairs were Alex easily picked her up in his arms and ran up the stairs and through her bedroom door. He gently lay her down, although he wanted to rip everything off and make love to her, he had to gentle. Claire was his trophy he never wanted to hurt her. Claire lay overlooking Alex as he pulled her wet shirt off, caressing her shoulders with a trail of kisses, he unclipped her bras finally after months of staring he finally got to touch. To engulfed to stop now, Claire had forgot her worries, she wanted Alex and that's all that matter, she pulled at his board shorts anxiously, lucky for her he had already taken his shirt off. Usually Claire and Alex would take it slowly; to explore each other's bodies fully by touching, caressing, nibbling, kissing and sucking...finding new ways to express their complete love and devotion to one another, building on the overall sensuality of the moment, but there was no time. They were both a ticking time bomb and before too long Alex had entered her with complete concentration. Claire closed her eyes as new sensations began to take over her body. Alex slowly withdrew and repeated the motions, faster he got with each movement rocking her body below him, gaining friction and momentum, low growling sounds escaping his mouth. The excitement was almost too much to bear and when both of them were ready to comply with each other's desire. Soon, familiar chaotic waves of ecstasy overcame Claire and she cried out as she reached orgasm, waves of bliss bursting out all around her in brilliant colours. Alex soon followed her path into the unknown, Claire securing her legs around his hips. He filled her and then they kissed before collapsing. Alex watched as her perfect breasted heaved up and down for air. He pulled his board shorts up quickly as he watched Claire put her bottom's on and shirt, before they collapsed yet again together, Alex enveloping Claire in his arms, kissing her forehead,
"We should probably get back," She sighed kissing him again,
"Yeah," he smiled picking Claire up in his arms,
"I can walk," she smiled wrapping her arms around his neck. Alex just laughed and kissed her yet again on the lips, there were addicting, he never wanted to let them go.
Meg heard Jodi count to three before her and Stevie went flying towards the dam, obviously a competition. Tess and Nick were over the other side of the dam, talking and swimming with Charlotte, who giggled and gurgled as she floated. Claire and Alex pulled up quickly behind Meg and made their way back into the dam, still with an obvious glow from there moment of passion,
"Look Charlotte here's your mummy," Tess cooed as Claire and Alex both swam over to them, Alex took Charlotte and hoisted her onto his shoulders,
"Where did you two go?" Tess asked wiping her face free from water. Claire looked back to Alex with a pronounced smile, "Oh hang on," Tess frowned with a smirk, "I don't want to know do I?" She laughed. All Alex and Claire could do was laugh, they had been could out,
"You lot, Terry's here!" Meg called as Terry came down to the dam with an armful of food for the night.
"So you and Alex hey" Tess asked with a wide smile, nudging Claire who sat impatiently waiting in the doctors lounge. She smiled back at Tess, it must have been plain to see yesterday,
"That obvious?" she asked frowning,
"Yep, especially the squeaky floorboard last night," Tess beamed, "About time," she chimed, as Claire laughed, having a flash back of last night,
"Claire McLeod!" the receptionist hollered. Claire and Tess got up, Claire having great difficulty; hers and Alex's passion had ended up giving her back havoc, but no pain no gain she smiled as she was lead into Dr. Proudman's office, leaving Tess outside,
"Miss McLeod," he smiled, "How are you" he added as she lowered herself down gingerly,
"Okay," she smiled,
"So Natasha informed me last week, you need a cortisone injection and a once over," he read from his silver laptop. Claire never really got the whole idea for having laptops in offices, what was the point, but she shook her head clearing that thought for now as she was escorted to the examination room. Sitting down promptly on the table. Her mind still in the after effects of passion, blissfully taken away for the present as Dr. Proudman examined her every muscle and tendon. She thought proudly of Charlotte seven months already. She smiled to herself, this morning Charlotte had fed herself her finger food, but she still felt guilty for not breast feeding Charlotte, but with the drugs she was pumped full of. It wasn't exactly the best thing to do. Although a perk was her breasts, they had grown three cup sizes, but the unmentionable pain and swelling was a downside,
"Any Questions" Dr. Proudman asked clearing his throat, noticing Claire was far, far away, she hadn't even flinched when he gave her the cortisone injection,
"Oh, no not really," Claire said crashing back down to earth, "Wait…. There is one thing," Claire added cutting Dr. Proudman off from starting his medical jargon,
"Go on,"
"Is it possible for me to get pregnant again?" Claire hadn't realised that question actually came out of her mouth; she sat bewildered her mind had taken over the situation, but it was something she wanted, with Alex from the moment she laid eyes on him. Dr. Proudman sighed,
"I'd have to do some blood tests, before I could give you a defined answer," He said, his total dimena changing, Claire frowned slightly
"Is there a problem?"
"Just with your steroid use during the 8 hours, it may be possible you could be infertile," Claire's heart sank to the pit of her stomach it felt, she nodded lightly,
"We can do the blood test now, you should get the results back in two weeks or so," Dr. Proudman said putting down his pen. Claire nodded, she wanted the blood test to over and done with and in no time it was done a full 6 tubes were taken, "Also you do realise your back pain will increase?" Dr. Proudman stated as he filled in a referral for Claire's tablets and pain killers. Claire nodded again, still reeling over the bombshell she might be infertile, every woman's worst dream. Her head in the clouds as she was dismissed out of the surgery, Tess not even getting through to her, 'how could that happen?' The next two weeks would be horrible...
TWO WEEKS LATER
Claire sat dazed in Dr. Proudman's office, she would find out for sure whether she could have children. The past two weeks went so slowly, Charlotte was now a whole eight months old. Alex had been so supportive and loving, showering her in kisses and then caring for her when in pain,
"Miss McLeod?" Dr. Proudman asked clearing his thought; Claire looked up surprised she let her mind take her way again, "Miss McLeod I've got your results," he stated a small frown indented on his forehead, this couldn't be good, "Long story short I think it would be better if we tried IVF," The last words hit Claire fair in the stomach. IVF she wasn't able to produce naturally? There had to be something wrong,
Why?" she asked slightly insulted her fertility was being questioned,
"It seems the steroids plus the cortisone has diminished most of your eggs, as for the couple left most of those have been damaged," he blabbered on, but Claire went numb, her worst nightmare, any woman's worst nightmare…..infertility. The world seemed to slow from the on, in slow motion she went through the actions of filling out the form, paying for her check-up and even while Tess drove her back to Drovers. Her head clouded, the word infertility bouncing around in her head, it was too much she couldn't hold it in anymore,
"Pull over!" She yelled as the tears she had held so tightly came rushing out with a loud cry. Tess was frantic to put the car in park and comfort her sister,
"What's wrong? Is it your back?" Tess asked resting her hand on Claire's shoulder as she shuddered from the run of tears. Claire shook her head vigorously,
"Tess," she whimpered looking up at her sister, Tess looked back worry written across every inch of her face, "I'm infertile,: she said with tears running furiously down her cheeks. Tess was lost for words, she never knew Claire went into the doctors for that,
"Oh.. Did he actually say that?" Tess asked knowing Claire could get a little carried away. Claire stopped her whimpering slightly to think,
"No, he said from the steroids and cortisone most of my eggs have been damaged," she blubbered, Tess felt for her sister,
"He said most Claire, there's still a chance," Tess said with hope hanging on every last word. Claire seemed to shake harder from her fit of tears,
"he said I'd have to do IVF Tess!" She cried again slumping her head down, "I can't have kids with Alex," she cried harder. Tess blinked she what? Claire wanted kids with Alex. Tess' heart sank further, this added more pain to the situation, now she knew why Claire was so cut up, her Alex and Charlotte and a family, would never be. Or would it? Tess gave her sister a hug before driving slowly back to Drovers giving time for Claire to wipe her tears away and refresh herself.
Claire tapped her fingers together as she listened to the content and relaxed breathing of Alex next to her. How could she be infertile? She shook her head glancing to Alex as he laid asleep his arm across her stomach. The hospital should have told her the risks! Claire was somewhat ropeable but still with a sense of depression. Her whirlwind of thoughts where pushed aside as she heard the beginnings of Charlotte's hungry cry. Slipping her way out of Alex's iron grip she walked cautiously to Charlotte who immediately reached out when she saw Claire. Picking Charlotte up painfully she smiled before walking her down to the kitchen, to warm her bottle up. Claire sighed again as she sat Charlotte on the bench still with her arm wrapped tightly around her, it gave relief to her splintering back pain. Looking down at the 8 month olds head she stroked her head softly as the bottle warmed in the oven on low heat, she began whispering in her ear,
"I'm sorry BOM," she sighed kissing her chubby cheeks, her eyes becoming filled with tears, "I'm so sorry mummy has been away for so long," she cooed kissing her yet again, "I promise I'll never do it again," Claire smiled through her tears as Charlotte's hand rested on her mother's wet cheek,
"and I promise I'll do anything to give you a sister or brother," Claire sighed wishfully picking Charlotte up fully and taking out the now warmed battle. Meanwhile Alex woke slowly his eyes adjusting to the darkness he soon found he was alone. Getting up he made his way down the stairs to where he could see the kitchen light was on, with only the sounds of Charlotte's hungry gurgles as she drank her bottle and Claire's whispering,
"Then you can look after them like I did with Tess," Claire said as Charlotte kept a watchful eye on her as she suckled at the bottle. "But I promise I'll never take you away from them," Alex frowned slightly as he crept to the doorway,
"Take who away?" he asked peeking his head around the corner. Claire looked up in a fluster of fright,
"No one," She smiled standing up carrying Charlotte carefully up to her room, ignoring the questioning look Alex was giving her. She was followed closely by Alex as she took Charlotte into her room as she was almost finished her small bottle. Alex rested his hand on Claire's back as Charlotte took her last mouthful of milk and was sat back into her crib, her eyes now getting heavy for sleep.
"She looks so peaceful," Alex whispered as Charlotte close her eyes. Claire smiled before turning on her heel to go back to sleep, "You okay?" Alex asked still following her, his hand planted firmly in the crook of her back,
"Yeah," Claire sighed nodding as she clambered onto the now cold bed, Alex following her,
"Okay," Alex whispered as she lay her head down. Wrapping the blanket around herself she felt Alex pull her into an embrace, "I love you," she sighed as he sank deeply into the pillow, sleep coming to him fast, unlike Claire who lay staring at a picture of Alex, herself and Charlotte in Melbourne, she was sure she wanted children more than anything now.
Alex sighed as he waited in the heat for Claire; she had to go feed Charlotte. He felt the drips of sweat pools from his hair line dripping it's his eyes he wiped them hard,
"Gee I expected to come back and the job be done," Claire smiled, Alex was blown away Claire seemed to be glowing. Wearing her usual jeans and a white singlet he couldn't look away from some reason she just seemed so radiant. "Well," Claire coughed as she waited for Alex to come back to Earth, god know what was on that man's mind sometimes,
"Claire you…" He trailed off, Claire looked at him worried,
"Is something wrong?" She asked wary, looking down at herself to check nothing was out of place,
"You look amazing," he sighed dreamily, she looked at him with a squint,
"Thanks," she answered slightly wary of his kind words, he only did that when he wanted something. Little did Claire no Alex did want something….her. A smile came easily as he glanced at the trough and then back at Claire as mixed the drench together,
"Oi Claire what's this?" he asked walking towards the trough as a prank,
"What is it?" Claire asked pre-occupied with the drench,
"Ah I dunno'….come have a look," he suggested finding it hard to keep his mischievous smile contained. Alec heard Claire give a full force sigh as she dropped what she was doing,
"What?" she asked slightly agitated, but before she could even think of looking at the imaginary thing she had a handful of water thrown towards her. She gasped at the coldness before giving Alex and agitated look, but a smile soon crept of her face, Alex laughed as he dodged the splashes of water Claire tried so desperately to get him with. Alex ran up towards her before she could turn easily picking her up, She shrieked,
"oh was that a girly scream I heard?" he asked amused,
"No!" she said defiantly trying to wriggle free, "Let me go," she said with laughter,
"Nope," he smiled lowering her closer to the water,
"Alex!" she shrieked again,
"Oh yet another girly scream," he laughed as he finally dropped her carefully into the trough. Claire had a look of complete euphoria of the moment not to mention a tinge of passion, these days it felt like one simple word could get her and Alex into the mood,
"I think the sheep can wait don't you?" Alex whispered into her lips, still she sat in the trough of cold water, but it didn't bother her, she didn't notice anything but Alex, as she nodded. Yet again he picked her up in his arms, taking her slowly to the homestead for another moment of passion, a very regular thing these days!
MONTH LATER
Claire at yet again in Dr Proudman's office. Only a week ago she a sat here getting a blood test and a cortisone injection, but Dr Proudman had called her back immediately, causing her to stress uncontrollably. The family smell of…. Of nothing was surrounding her until he walked in,
"Ah Miss McLeod," he smiled broadly sitting in his chair, "How are you?" he asked opening her file to check her latest stat's,
"Yeah good," she smiled, waiting for his response. His expression change to one of sadness, Claire heart sank,
"Your blood test shows something," he started with a frown, Claire looked at his her face filled with worry, " Were not quite sure how you're going to take this," he added waiting for Claire to ask him what was wrong as any patient would do,
"What? I'm infertile aren't i? I can't have kids," Claire said on the verge of tears, Dr Proudman smiled joyfully at her,
"Your pregnant," Claire froze when she heard Dr Proudman say that, she frowned,
"What?"
Your pregnant," he smiled, her frown disappeared and was replaced with the look of shock,
"I'm pregnant?" she asked not believing this was real,
"Yeah, exactly a month pregnant," he smiled, laughing at Claire's reaction. Claire smiled increased by the second, this couldn't be happening,
"It is okay isn't it?" she asked her demeanour changing immediately to one of panic,
"Everything seems fine, but we can't tell until we do an ultra sound in a couple of months' time," he said still smiling,
"Oh my god," Claire sighed, her dream had come true, she was pregnant a month pregnant to Alex! This was fabulous!
Claire had had so much trouble keeping the news from everyone, they all asked why she was so happy her mood changing in an instant when Alex was near, but now there were alone, and she wanted him to be there first. Her pregnancy with Charlotte was rocky with the whole Peter thing, but this time it was going to be perfect,
"Alex?' she question as he slipped under the sheets,
"yeah?" he answered busy getting comfortable,
"Would you want kids?" she asked lightly she had to know for sure that he too wanted this. Alex looked at her with a smile but a furrowed brow,
"Yeah," he answered smiling as he looked directly into her eyes, Claire to a deep breath a smile still firmly planted on her own face,
"I'm pregnant Alex," she exclaimed looking deep into his eyes. Alex froze he looked at Claire dumbfounded,
"Really?" he asked another smile coming easily, she nodded smiling harder as he laughed before hugging her, "You're really pregnant? How do you know?" He asked as they sat up together he glanced to her stomach back up to her blue eyes,
"My doctor Alex, he took blood last week and I'm pregnant," she said searching his face for anything, he was still dumbfounded with an obvious smile on his lips,
"ah Claire I love you so much," he sighed placing his hand on her stomach, she looked into his eyes yet again before they kissed. Alex parted from Claire glancing from her stomach to her beautiful eyes; this was the right time, no time like the present. He turned around and opened is drawer near the bed and pulled out the black velvet box. Claire looked confused at what he was doing, tyring her best to try and look over his shoulder but it was no used,
"Claire," he started his voice dreamy, he turned fully to look back into Claire confused stare, "I've always wanted to ask you this, as long as I've lived," he sighed showing her the box. Her eyes widened before looking back at Alex in shock, this wasn't what she thought it was, was it?
"Claire Louise McLeod will you marry me?" he asked a nervous smile on his face as he opened the velvet box to reveal the gold band with diamonds encrusted on it. She smiled looking at how beautiful the ring was. Claire wasn't the jewellery kind of girl but that… that ring was amazing,
"Yes," she said with gusto before kissing Alex hard in the lips he kissed her back before placing the ring on her finger gently,
"God I love you," he sighed kissing her forehead, placing his hand back on her stomach, she giggled like a girl,
"I'm getting all girly on you Ryan," she confessed after another girly giggle, Alex laughed before looking into her eyes yet again, a blue oasis…. A wonderful place,
"I love you too," she sighed falling into his embrace. Finally after years of wishing her dream finally came true, but not with some hardship and pain along the way.
Prologue:
In months to follow the newly wedded Claire Louise McLeod-Ryan would stand in front of her friends and family with her own two children by her side Charlotte and her newly born happy healthy baby boy: Jack Marion McLeod-Ryan. Finally she had the family she'd always dreamed of with the man of her dreams: Alex Ryan, no one or nothing could separate them now they were one, always were and always will be.