The day began as any other would, with the sometimes vile, sometimes exquisite chirps of the morning birds, sounds of an empty house, and feelings of numbness. It was a Thursday and the weekend couldn't come fast enough. While the days were mostly repetitive, there was always one thing that made my day; talking with Harleen. Harleen is the most beautiful and intriguing woman I have ever had the pleasure to converse with. She is exactly my type; long flowing blonde hair, mostly worn in pigtails; silky smooth skin; and a perfect athletic figure. She hosts her own public service television show "Heart to Heart with Harley". That is where I first learned of her.
Enough reminiscing, it was time for work, as it always was at six in the morning. I worked five days a week for ten hours a day. I got ready for work and headed out. Getting to work was a chore in and of itself, let alone the mind crushing boredom of being a cubicle jockey. The days dragged on as I always finished my work in the first few hours of the day. Having to come up with ways to entertain oneself on a daily basis for hours and hours can have interesting side effects on the psyche. It's like being trapped inside your head as if you were in solitary confinement in a maximum security prison.
You get used to it of course, the numbing boredom, and the talks with yourself, the arguing. My job was the easiest job out there. All my job duties could be done by a monkey. If the world wasn't in such a shit place I would quit and find something I really enjoyed. Unfortunately, the world was a shit place and the only other option was being a criminal. This wasn't really in the cards for me. I suppose I could do it, but the consequences scared me. Though, the city was filled with crime; nothing seemed to happen to the whack jobs running the show. Or maybe it did, but I still had no intention of finding out for myself. Enough arguing, the work day was over already.
The time for Harleen's show was nearing and I could hardly wait. Her insight into other people's relationships was astounding. This was a woman who could handle herself. I watched her show all the time and I was a regular caller. We knew each other well, and had gone on several dates. She and I were of the same cloth. We had very much in common and I had to admit I was rather smitten. I couldn't admit it to her though. I didn't call in, but I watched her work. After the show she gave me a call wondering why I hadn't phoned in. I told her it was because I was pretty sure that the audience was getting tired of me. I didn't like to inconvenience anyone. She assured me that it didn't matter to her anyways. I almost let slip that I love her, but instead I asked her out on a romantic getaway. She said yes and we said our goodbyes.
Friday was a whole new day. I awoke with the serenity of my surroundings. I felt renewed, as if all my problems had melted away. My thoughts floated around like clouds on a lazy afternoon. I couldn't focus, but that was fine with me. It was the end of the week and I couldn't be more excited for Harleen and I's romantic getaway. After some conjecture with myself, though, I knew I wouldn't have enough money to take her out. This just couldn't be. I needed to impress this marvelous woman. The Ice Berg lounge was very expensive and quite hard to get a reservation at. What would I do? I couldn't cancel. I would look a fool. At the same time, all my thoughts circled around one thing: crime. They say crime doesn't pay, but living here, in this place, it was obvious that it was the only way to get paid.
I found myself remembering how Harleen and I came to know one another. It was an amazing time and we had a lot of fun getting to know one another….
It was a Monday, so I knew her show would be on. I watched all day, waiting for an opportunity to call. I would talk to her on her show first.
"Caller, you are now on the show! What is your question?" Harleen's sweet voice cooed.
"Well Harleen, my question involves a lovely woman with a brilliant mind and how I can subdue her. I figured you for the brilliant minded and thought I'd give your show a try." I said seductively.
"I am flattered Mista?"
"The name is Jack, Jack Weis, but my friends call me J."
"Well then I'll call you Mista J. So am I to assume that this lovely lady knows that you like her?
"I am hoping that by this time she certainly would." I said, a little nervous.
"Oh, I am sure she knows Mr. J. But you really gotta know, ya know?"
"Indeed. What do you think the odds of my getting her number might be?"
"Well Mista J, we have run out of time on the show, so why don't you give me a call in private, so we can finish this session? Send me an e-mail with a number I can reach you at and I'll give you a call ASAP! How does that sound?"
"It sounds excellent Miss Harleen. I'll be waiting to hear from you."
Click. So it begins, I thought to myself. I shall have this woman, for she is more like me than most. She is unfathomably interesting. It's truly astonishing how much she enthralls me. No one must ever know, not even her. My mind wandered, thinking about the possibilities of a new life, a life that mattered, and a life that someone would care about.
I found myself quite nervous when the phone finally rang. I knew it could only be her. I had no family ties, and virtually no friends. The only social interactions I had were at my work place. I wasn't sure how I would go about telling her that it was indeed her that I was attracted to. She had caught on that I liked her from our previous encounter over the phone; that much I was sure of.
"Hello, this is Jack, and with whom am I speaking?"
"Hey Mista J, its Harleen, from 'Heart to Heart with Harley', I was hoping you were home."
"Excellent, I have been awaiting your call. You see, it is really you with whom I am infatuated. I have watched your show from the start. I hope you don't feel that the way I made contact was… unfavorable."
"Oh no Mista J, I found it pretty flattering in fact. I've been pretty lonely. Being a relationship advisor really gets me down when I think about what got me started in the first place. You see I have had a few fellas that treated me pretty badly. So I decided to help out gals that were in that same position," revealed Harleen.
"That is quite terrible my dear. I would never treat such a brilliant, beautiful woman in that way. I'm shocked that any man could. My dear Harleen, may I ask you out for drinks tonight?" I asked, hopeful.
"Drinks? What kind of drinks did you have in mind? I… lost my license so I can't really go to any bars." Harleen cautiously mentioned.
"You misunderstand; I myself am not big on drinking alcohol. I meant coffee or smoothies, something along those lines." I explained.
"Oh! Of course I will Mista J. I can't wait to get to know you!"
I came out of my memories when I realized I was at a bar. I had been doing things whilst in a trance of remembrance. My subconscious must have been working towards a solution to my problem of not having enough money to take Harleen out, let alone to buy her an engagement ring. I had been planning on popping the question for a while now, but the moment was never right.
I asked the bartender where I could find some quick money; he pointed me to a small, curtained off room. I entered cautiously, all the while my thoughts were screaming that it could be a trap that I could get killed, but I ignored them. I had no choice.
"Welcome, may we help you with something?" said a burly man with a long gritty beard.
"Uh, yes, I uh, I came looking for a job, a… fast paying job. You see, I need to buy a ring, and it can't be any old ring, it has to be special. That kind of thing comes at a high price." I replied with some hesitation.
"Then, my pale friend, you have come to the right place. Just in time too. We are about to hit a place named Ace Chemicals. The place is loaded on Sundays. We needed a few more men and it looks like you fit the bill. What do you say? Do you want to make some good money, and fast?"
"That is exactly what I want. I've never done anything like this before, is it well planned out? What happens if the cops show up?"
"We have a distraction set up for our little boys in blue. Trust me; everything will go quite smoothly for us."
"Ok, so what is my part in all of this?"
"We need you to be the man watching out for any warning signs that we've been busted. You'll be right outside of the safe room, which is mostly secured by the fact that there is toxic waste removal systems littered beneath a narrow catwalk."
"That sounds pretty dangerous, but hey, I've needed some adventure so what the hell. I'm in."
"Excellent. We will meet in the alley way behind this bar on Sunday at around midnight to go over the plan. We have to do this at night, between the guard shifts. It will be difficult, but I believe we have covered enough ground to do it flawlessly."
"Good, then I will be here, until then gentlemen, good day." I retorted as I left the bar.
The Boss watched Jack leave the bar. He had had a euphoric look in his eyes. Hearing that Jack wanted to buy a ring for his little Harleen had made his day. Usually the process to join the mob was painstaking and took around three months of smaller jobs, building up to a big hit. With Jack, though, it was a different story. While the Boss had never wanted Harleen to be a part of the mob, he would gladly accept Jack into the fold, where he could watch over him and make sure he didn't get into too much trouble. From everything Harleen had told him in her letters, this man was the one she would spend the rest of her life with. The fact that Jack was planning to pop the question made his heart sing with joy for his daughter. The Boss already considered Jack as part of their family. Finally being able to meet Jack brought a tear to his eye. He would make sure Jack had a ring and money.
The night was long after that. I had many thoughts pop up that it was still a trap; especially since it was so easy to get the job, but I had no choice but to force them down, to convince myself it was a one-time deal to get that ring for Harleen. Of course I could never let her find out, and in case something went wrong I needed to be disguised. I thought of a simple black mask, but shot it down immediately, I would need something that would cover more of my face; perhaps all of it. I decided that I would go with something of a bit of a flashy maître d'. I went in search and found something perfect. It was a hood of sorts that covered your face completely, it allowed you to see only through small eye holes which would be inconvenient but would work just fine for the purpose. A cape also came with it, I was undecided if I would wear such a thing, but it was flashy, so I went with it.
I awoke much too early, with too many thoughts struggling for attention. I went to work begrudgingly, expecting a very boring day with nothing to pass the time. My expectations were met. As soon as I got to work I was berated for being minutes late, a normal event of the day. After that I went to my desolate little cubicle. A poor excuse for even a jail cell. Not even a minute after I sat down was I dealing with assholes from across the country, asking me stupid questions, accusing me of somehow destroying their machines. Around noon I had had enough. On my break I asked my fellow drones what their thoughts on the job were. There was no good response. This fact allowed me to finally do what I'd wanted to do for so very long. I had no thoughts in my head; it was all so crystal clear now. Why had I been working somewhere that drove me so insane? It wasn't just me even; no one I conversed with enjoyed their crappy existence. I could not fathom why so many people did this day to day. I needed to live from now on. No more waking up with thoughts of suicide, I was done with that. I marched into my boss's office, thinking I would make some big scene and tell off the big cheese like most people only wish they could do. Instead I walked in, looked my boss in the eye and said, "I hope you stay at this job the rest of your life, but me, I am out of here, I will not take being treated like a robot any longer, nor will I feel like a piece of trash." And that was that. I walked out from his office, grabbed a few office supplies and left. I never looked back.
The rest of the day I pondered on what I had done. Harleen would never be with someone who couldn't hold his own. I would have to continue in the crime business if they would have me. I knew I could make it as a criminal; there were already so many, how hard could it be? Most cops in this town were crooked anyhow. I decided that's how it would have to be. I would make way more cash as a criminal anyway. Harleen could never find out of course, that is why I had the hood.