DISCLAIMER: I DO NOT OWN NCIS OR ANY OF ITS CHARACTERS!
BOTTLED UP
Ch 1
He knew they all talked about it. Not in a concerned or worried way, more often than not it was as a joke. He liked his bourbon. It was pretty much that simple. It wasn't too often that he drank to excess. Only on those nights it helped to keep the ghosts at bay.
There were only a few nights a year they came. He didn't fear them, for they would never harm him, at least not physically. He did find their beautiful essences too much to bear. The guilt would consume him. He couldn't look into there ethereal eyes without knowing he'd let them down. He'd failed them. He should've been there to protect them.
They liked to visit on their birthdays, always together. Mother would never leave daughter behind. Daughter would never leave mother's side. On his birthday he would see them, too. Their wedding anniversary was a difficult day, but the hardest was the anniversary of their deaths. It was the day he dreaded the most and the night he began his drinking the earliest.
There was a part of him that wondered if it was the booze addling his brain and making him conjure up their spirits. Then again their visions were too perfect. He found it difficult in his sober state to picture them clearly. Certainly in an inebriated state they would appear less so, not more.
The day of their deaths was coming near again. He wished he could be stronger. His team always saw him as their fearless leader. They had no clue how much of a coward he was when it came to facing his grief.
The little talk he heard of them in regards to his lost family came close, but they didn't think he suffered like anyone else. The drinking? They didn't associate it to his emotions only that after he'd tied one on it was best to stay on his good side until the coffee kicked in.
Ducky may have an inkling to his friend's actions, but he allowed the man to lose himself when he needed to. Seeing the concern on the younger agents' faces and Abby's he began to rethink his own stand. Perhaps it was time for Gibbs to deal with his demons face to face, so to speak. Once resolved to the idea he summoned the group to autopsy. It was time to help their boss whether he liked it or not.
"Okay, Duck. Gibbs got called into the office by Vance. He said he'd keep him as long as possible. But the mood the boss is in today it might not be for very long," Tony informed the M.E. as the team followed him into the quiet home of Dr. Mallard.
"That 'mood' is precisely why I called you all down here. Our dear Jethro is due to go home and imbibe in a copious amount of bourbon. We need to be there and prevent the inevitable day he'll put us through tomorrow."
"You want us to keep him from drinking?" Ziva asked not seeing anyway of succeeding in that venture aside from disarming Gibbs. That would be removing the appendages from his body.
"Yes, Ziva. There is a reason he drinks to excess. It doesn't happen every time he drinks, but I think we've known him long enough. At least I have to sense when he's driven to overindulge."
Tim nodded, "You would know better than us Ducky. What's the plan?"
Ducky looked to each of them in turn.
"You don't have a plan," Tony stated, but decided to throw in his own two cents. "Okay we go to Gibbs. He'll be in the basement so we confront him there. After he glares us all down we get him to talk."
"That would be great if Gibbs actually talked," Tim rolled his eyes.
"You got a better idea, Probie?" Tony jeered.
Abby raised her hand jumping up and down excitedly.
"Yes, Abigail?" Ducky smiled at her enthusiasm.
"I could give him one of my very special hugs. He likes them," she smiled proudly.
"Yes that would hold him back momentarily," Ducky patronized her lovingly.
Abby glared hearing his tone, "Well no one else is offering anything." She folded her arms and pouted.
Ziva shook her head sadly at her Goth friend. "Gibbs needs more than a hug Abby. Perhaps we can save your hug for last so that he feels loved. Yes?" she countered.
Abby was cheered by that proposal and perked up to hear what other plans could be presented.
"Nice save Ziva," Tim whispered in her ear walking around her to stand by Abby. "I'm thinking we'll have to investigate why some days, like this one, are so bad for him," he said louder to everyone.
"I don't think it'll take too much investigating," Ducky removed his glasses and pinched his nose between his eyes.
"You know already. Don't you Dr. Mallard?" Jimmy looked knowingly at the older man.
Ducky nodded, "I'm afraid I know a good part of the reason. Today, at least is the anniversary of Shannon's and Kelly's deaths."
Tony mentally Gibbs' slapped himself, as the others quietly digested the fact that all of them failed to register that factor into Gibbs' drinking.
"You have not known about it for very long and have less time than I to keep track of such things," Ducky soothed. "It wasn't until recently I'd seen the pattern myself. The other dates I'm sure are connected in some way to them as well. The bigger question we need to find the answer to is 'why?'."
"Why Duck? Is it not enough that he remembers and relives the pain?" Ziva queried not unfamiliar with persistent unwanted memories rearing their ugly heads at her.
"We all know Gibbs well enough to know that it has to be more than the memories. I'm sure he remembers them everyday and night. So what is remarkable enough on days like today that makes him lose himself in a bottle?"
"I say we go and find out. Whatever it is he won't have to face it alone. We can get him through it," Tim suggested.
"I say we get back to the squad room before Gibbs comes looking for us," Tony looked at his watch.
"Right," Ducky conceded. "Be at his house by 1900. I'll go in a bit earlier and try to prepare him."
"Good luck with that Duck," Tony waved as he pushed his team mates through the door to the elevator.
When Gibbs walked down the stairs the agents were sitting at their desks working. Gibbs stopped up short narrowing his eyes. Nothing looked out of the ordinary, but his gut was still on alert.
The rest of the work day passed without a new case arriving. Though Gibbs had continued to observe his agents' interactions nothing was amiss. The usual bantering and cajoling was shared. Deciding he needed to get home, because the night was going to be difficult enough to deal with without trying to figure out what may or may not be going on among his team, he grabbed his coat from the back of his chair and retrieved his gun and badge bidding a gruff "See you in the morning," as he left.
The team bid him good night and watched him leave before making their final plans on where and when to meet. Tim and Ziva would drive together and Tony agreed to pick up Abby. She would be in no condition to drive if things were going to be as emotional as they feared.