Dear Diary,
Okay. So normally I'm not a diary kind of guy, but um, Allura insisted the Paladins of Voltron write their thoughts down. Something about it helping to get more in sync with our feelings and making it easier to form Voltron? I don't know.
In any case, here I am. I'm Lance, Paladin of the Blue Lion and the hottest thing on this side of the solar system! You can't see me, but just know that I have amazing hair. It's the softest. In the world. I also happen to have wonderful skin. (Keith may laugh at my skincare regimen but trust me, I don't put that goop on my face for nothing!) Might I mention that I also have fantastical blue eyes? They're the color of the ocean waves. Really, I'm practically perfect. Okay Allura says we have to go to save some planet or other, but I'll be back later. Wouldn't want you to miss me!
LANCE
Dear Book,
Let's make something clear: I'm doing this only because it'll help the team. There's no other reason.
Now that we've established that, I guess I should introduce myself? Lance was laughing maniacally just now. Pidge asked what he was doing and he said he was merely introducing himself to his "precious beloved diary." Whatever. You're obviously cooler. Oh right. Yeah. Introducing myself.
I'm Keith. I like swords. Happy?
Okay Allura just glared at me cause I'm not writing anymore. What the heck Allura? Hunk is over there laughing with Coran and looking at pictures and I'm the one who gets yelled at? I call BS. Oh great, she's still glaring at me. I don't know what else to say, so I'm just going to pretend like I'm writing. Foolproof plan Keith, great job.
Oh great. The Arusians are in trouble. Again. Right okay I'm going to go now. Have to save the world and all. Bye.
Yellow!
Hi! My name's Hunk. Allura says to write feelings out so it'll help out the team or something. But I kept a diary at the Garrison so this'll be no different, right?
Anyways, I decided to name you Yellow because you are yellow. That's what color the cover is. Lance has blue, Keith has red, Pidge has green, etc, etc. Allura has a pink one and Coran's matches his mustache.
Allura said to write what interests us. And right now, food interests me. See, I'm trying to make a new flavor of food goo. Coran told us about this Altean dessert he enjoyed as a kid. Man, can you imagine a kid-sized Coran, mustache and all? Oh he's walking by now…one tick.
Coran just showed me the most amazing picture. I don't know why he keeps pictures of his mini-self on his person at all times, but man am I glad he does! He looks kinda cute actually.
Oh and that's the call to assemble. Got to go!
Day 1: Afternoon
An explanation:
I know that I should probably be writing in that nice green journal over there, and that yeah writing is more meaningful than typing and whatever, but I like tablets. A lot. So I'm just going to use a tablet and call that my diary.
You know, I thought this diary thing would be kind of awful. But I just realized: my diary is a tablet. A tablet I can upgrade to record things and program to type whatever I say. This is great!
All the things I could do…
Journal Entry #1
As the team leader of Voltron, I'm really glad Allura came up with this idea. Writing our feelings out is a great way to get us to more in tune with our emotions. Forming Voltron will become even easier than before. Although, I'm a little concerned about those emotions. Lance is doing a great imitation of an evil villain, Keith is scowling at his notebook, Hunk is…looking at baby pictures with Coran and writing about it? And Pidge is typing into a tablet with a gleam in her eyes that means no one (and I mean no one) is safe from whatever she's planning to do next.
There's Allura with a call to action. Better go, don't want to keep the Princess waiting.
DEAR DIARY,
I AM FURIOUS. I CANNOT BELIEVE- NO. I REFUSE TO BELIEVE IT. I WAS ONE TICK BEHIND EVERYONE ELSE. ONE TICK. AND ALLURA, FREAKING ALLURA GOES "This was just a drill. Paladins, you must do better next time." AND WE'RE CHILL AND ALL "Yes Princess we won't disappoint!" AND THEN SHE- I CAN'T BELIEVE IT. SHE SAYS "Lance, you were the slowest. That warrants punishment." AND I'M LIKE LOL WHAT CAN SHE DO AND THEN SHE WHIPS OUT A CONTAINER OF MY SKINCARE PRODUCTS. MY SKINCARE PRODUCTS. S. AND PROCEEDS TO JUST DUMP IT. SHE EJECTS IT. FROM THE CASTLE. AND I'M UNDERSTANDABLY HORRIFIED BECAUSE HELLO? MY SKINCARE PRODUCTS HAVE JUST BEEN EJECTED INTO SPACE WHERE I WILL NEVER SEE THEM AGAIN EVER- AND SHE JUST SMIRKS. AND GOES, "That's why you don't switch peoples' shampoos with food goo." LIKE? THAT WAS AGES AGO. I APOLOGIZED FIFTY THOUSAND TIMES. CORAN JUST NODS IN AGREEMENT. AND SHIRO, BELOVED SPACE DAD THAT HE WAS, JUST SHRUGS AND SAYS, "Well Lance, you shouldn't have done that." I TURN TO HUNK, EXPECTING SOME SYMPATHY YOU KNOW? AND HE JUST GOES, "Well buddy, you kinda brought it upon yourself." AND PIDGE, THE LITTLE GREMLIN, JUST CACKLES AND POINTS A TABLET AT ME. WHAT THE HECK? AT LEAST KEITH WAS SYMPATHETIC. HE SAID IT WAS PRETTY MEAN ON ALLURA'S PART. WHICH IT WAS. ALL THAT SKINCARE…JUST GOING DOWN THE DRAIN. ALLURA BETTER WATCH HER BACK. I WILL GET MY REVENGE.
LANCE THE AVENGER ALLURA YOU BETTER WATCH YOUR BACK HOW DARE YOU I AM APPALLED WHYYYYYYYYYYYY
Dear Book,
Good news: the Arusians aren't under attack. It was just a drill. Bad news: Lance is currently sobbing in the bathroom and angrily scribbling into his book.
See, he thought it would be funny to switch the shampoos with food goo. It washed pretty easily out of my hair, but for other people…not so much. Allura walked around with her hair tinted green for ages. She was pretty mad about it and she took her revenge today. Lance was late to the Lions, but only by a little. Allura punished him by throwing away his skincare. Hence the sobbing in the bathroom. I mean yeah Lance was a jerk but his skincare? He practically worships the stuff. I'm not saying I care about Lance, because I don't. Really. Shut up. But he didn't deserve this.
…
That doesn't mean I like him. It really doesn't. Shut up.
…
You know what? I'm going to go ask if he's okay. Cause I don't care if you think I like him or not. Cause I don't.
…
Fuck you.
Yellow!
So it turns out there were no planets under attack. It was just an excuse to find a way to throw away Lance's skincare supplies. Man, he got so red. I thought he was about to punch Allura right then and there. Normally I'd feel bad for him, but that food goo stinks when it's stuck in your hair for long enough. He put it in my shampoo and my hair smelled like rotten eggs for weeks. Sorry Lance, but he's got to deal with this by himself.
Day 1: Later in the Afternoon
Oh my god. I have never seen something quite as hilarious in my life. Unfortunately I wasn't able to capture the entire scene, but I managed to get some. The whole voice typing thing isn't perfect yet, so it might be a little confusing. I'll put it below this.
OH MY GOD HOW COULD YOU Lance please calm down it's just your skin- SHIRO HOW CAN YOU SAY SUCH THINGS It's not like it's the end of the world YES IT IS I'M DOOMED MY PORES ARE SUFFERING AS WE SPEAK Allura that was kind of mean YES THANK YOU KEITH AT LEAST KEITH HAS MY BACK- PIDGE STOP LAUGHING IT'S NOT FUNNY
I'll try and update the voice typing so it's not so confusing.
Journal Entry #2
This is horrible. Lance is currently sobbing in the bathroom and plotting to avenge the death of his skincare products. Allura refuses to apologize and Pidge is just cackling as she types into her tablet?
Maybe I should go talk to Lance. Make him feel better.
Huh. It seems like Keith has got that covered. That's weird. Usually they're ready to kill each other but it seems as if now Keith is comforting him? Wow. Those team-bonding exercises work wonders. I have to remember to ask Allura to implement more of those into our training schedules.