Sometimes, I wish our lives were normal. But they're filled with dangerous sea creatures, evil gnomes, and living wax states. And now there's a Cyborg and it's magical robot brother. The weird thing is though, only the robot seems to be sentient. Aren't Cyborgs supposed to have souls and everything because they're not all machine? This one just...sits there until Mabel of all people tells it what to do. It's starting to really creep me out. Maybe the empty robot can tell us what's the deal with them when we get its memory back...

*Gravity Falls theme song 'cause I feel like it.*Da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da - daaaa daa daaaaa, daa da da daaaa, daaaaa daa daaa da daa da da daaaa. Da da da da da da da, da da da da da da da, da da da da da da da, da da da, da da da. Da da da da da da da, da da da da, da, da, daaaa da-dilingldo.

Dipper sat upright in his bed in the attic, staring warily at the empty robot in the corner. It hadn't moved since Mabel had given it a battery - as a food bribe to stay put or something - but he still didn't trust it, let alone its...brother.

The Cyborg lay unconscious in the sleeping bag that Mabel had demanded he spend the night in, but Dipper still didn't trust him. Or it. No, it was a him. Even as a Cyborg, the boy still had a full face and mostly his whole body; the only thing out of whack was his right arm and left leg, which were completely mechanical. Dipper wasn't even sure if he could call it - him - a Cyborg. But the boy probably had a chip in his brain or something, because he...well he didn't...do much.

Mabel called him Jeromy; Dipper called him that poor mindless kid.

Dipper sighed as he got back to writing in his journal - meaning the journal he'd found in the woods a few weeks ago when a bunch of gnomes had tried to make Mabel their queen - at the same time as keeping a suspicious eye on the two house-guests.

I should probably tell you, whoever might read this in the distant future, how it all began. I'll write this is story form to make it less confusing.

So, Mabel and I were out in the woods, chasing after some wood nymphs that had stolen the bracelet Mabel's newest boyfriend had given her to stop her crying about their breakup. For some reason, she really wanted it back.

"Come on, Dipper!" she cried, chasing off in the direction we might have seen the nymph fly off in. "The fairy's getting away!"

"It's not a fairy," I informed her, hoping to enlarge her naive mind. "It's a wood nymph. The book said they're cunning masterminds with the ability to-"

"I GOT IT!" Mabel screeched, clutching a stray leaf. "But it doesn't have my bracelet! Where are you hiding it?" she demanded of the leaf, holding it in both hands.

I sighed at her childishness and walked over, grabbing the leaf out of her hand and crumbling it. She gasped. "Dipper! How could you?!"

"That wasn't the wood nymph, Mabel," I said impatiently, wishing to just go home before it got too dark. "As I was about to say," I flipped a few pages in my book. "Wood Nymphs are cunning masterminds with the ability to trick people into hallucinating whatever they want them to see. The only drawback is that they can only trick one person within ten feet at a time, so we have to stay together, okay Mabel?"

"DIPPER, LOOK WHAT I FOUND!" I looked up to find that Mabel was now nowhere to be seen. Of course.

"Where are you?" I shouted, looking around. I heard some rustling in a bush nearby and slowly approached, hoping this wasn't just the wood nymphs' tricks making me see something that wasn't there...

"BOO!"

"AH!" I fell backwards at what I'm guessing the nymphs made me think was a horrible monster, but then I saw that it was only Mabel. "Mabel! How many times have I told you not to do things like that when we're out in the woods? Who knows what's out here!"

"I do!" my sister exclaimed, spreading the leaves in the bush to reveal a hole in the ground. "This hole only drops down about four feet, then we walk down a slope until we come to something awesome! Come look!" She disappeared down the hole before I could tell her to stop.

"Mabel!" I shouted, hoping she'd listen to reason and get out of the strange tunnel.

"Come. On, Dipper!" she yelled impatiently. "There's a Cyborg down here!"

Cyborg? I'd have to take a look. And so, being the fearless leader that I was, I decided to explore what was on the other end of that tunnel, jumping in to a new adventure!

But of course, I had to twist my ankle. "Ooh, oh OW!" I yelped. This was probably the work of some...magical force field that prevented good looking boys from entering. This in mind, I hobbled along the one-way tunnel for a shout while before coming to a turn. I turned, and gasped. "Mabel..."

"I know, cool right?"

I gaped at what was in the small cave before me: First, the walls were all covered in strange markings; they looked like they were supposed to mean something, maybe some kind of ancient language, but it was impossible to tell. Second, there was a boy laying unconscious in the very center of the perfectly cubical cave; he was wearing mostly black clothes - all long, not meant for summer - and a red coat that was so ripped up it was about ready to fall off his shoulders, oh and he had two metal limbs; the left leg, and the right arm, both metal, sleeves and pant-legs ripped up too. Last was the giant headless robot that was chasing Mabel around in circles, trying to get its head from her grasp.

Wait what? "MABEL! GIVE IT ITS HEAD BACK!" I shouted in panic. I couldn't let Mabel get killed by a giant robot! What would I tell Grunkle Stan? What would I tell MOM for that matter? How could I live with myself?

"Yeah, listen to him! Give me my head back!" Mabel stopped abruptly at hearing the robot talk, turning around to face it as it skidded to a stop. It snatched up the head and attached it to its body again. "Thank you." it said politely.

Mabel's mouth widened into a grin. "You can talk?"

The robot looked about as offended as a robot could get. "Yes I can talk! Why shouldn't I?"

"Well, you're a robot for starters." I blurted, not thinking about the fact that I was saying it aloud.

"I'm a...what?" the robot looked very confused. "What's a robot?"

Mabel gasped. "You don't know what you are? Well...actually, that makes sense, what with you being, you know, empty and all. You must've had all your memory taken out!"

"Empty?" I asked as I cautiously approached, limping heavily on my twisted ankle.

The robot jumped back. "Um, yeah, I-I can explain that..."

"You can?"

"Yeah I-" it stopped, looking off to the side as though it was thinking. "I...I can't. I can't remember."

Mabel nodded as though she was a genius for figuring it out. "I knew it."

"But how can you be empty?" I asked incredulously. "A robot needs moving parts in order to, well move, so why haven't you got any? And you know what, I want to see inside you. C-ca-can you s-show me?" I stuttered at the end when I realized this was a weird question.

But the robot just nodded like it gets the request all the time. It knelt down so I could see the top of its head, and then it removed its head. I gasped. "You really are empty..."

"Mm, hm," the robot said as it put its head back on. Then it spotted the boy on the ground and gasped. (can robots gasp?) "BROTHER!"

"Brother?" Mabel repeated, looking at me questioningly.

I shrugged and just watched as the robot tried to awaken the Cyborg kid. "Brother? Brother, wake up! Don't leave me now, brother!"

Mabel walked over to him and held up a finger. "Maybe I can be of assistance." she stated professionally, and I immediately knew what she was going to do. I held my hands over my ears as she shouted, "WAKE UP, KID, YOUR FREAKY ROBOT BROTHER WANTS YOU!"

The Cyborg's eyes snapped open, causing Mabel and I to gasp. "Gold eyes..." I murmured, thinking I'd read something in the book about that...

"Brother, come on!" the robot practically screeched. My eyes widened and I snapped out of my remembering-things daze when I realized the kid wasn't moving. He was just laying there like...well, like death.

"Hold on," Mabel said, looking a tiny bit nervous herself. She knelt down next to the boy and waved her hand in front of his eyes. They followed. Then she stood up, snatched my arm, and dragged me over to wave my hand in front of his eyes. Nothing happened. She waved her hand; eyes followed. She grabbed the robot's hand and waved that; eyes didn't follow. In fact, now that I thought about it, the eyes were on Mabel the whole time. Weird.

"What does that mean?" the robot asked nervously. "Is brother alright?"

"What's his name?" I asked on an impulse.

"I..." the robot paused again, obviously distressed. "I don't know. I just remember that he's my brother."

This just kept getting weirder and weirder.

"Well, he obviously likes me," Mabel said, staring at him and moving her head around; the eyes followed. "Don't you, Jeromy?" she smiled. Where did she get a name like Jeromy?

"Yes."

We all jumped - including the robot - as the boy spoke. What the heck? "You can talk too?" I asked the kid, moving into his line of sight so he could see who was talking. But he kept staring blankly at Mabel.

"This is...scary" Mabel said, sitting down next to the boy's head. "Maybe he has a chip in his brain and he can only see me?" I shrugged. She looked back at him and said, "Hey, what's your name?"

The Cyborg scrunched up his eyebrows. "You said...Jeromy."

"So I was right?"

The Cyborg remained silent.

"I don't think that's right..." the robot said nervously.

Mabel made a sort of humming sound and reached down to touch his head, but I slapped her hand away. "MABEL! You can't just go touching random boys! Maybe he has a brain parasite or something; we don't know how it might spread!"

"Oh, relax, brother of mine," she said, smiling. "I think he's harmless. And he's cute anyway, look!" she motioned at the Cyborg's face. "Can we keep 'im?"

"No!" I practically shouted. "We can't just keep every strange creature we find in this forest!"

"He's not a creature!" Mabel exclaimed, looking horrified that I'd even make such a suggestion. "He's a boy! A normal boy! A normal boy with...golden hair, and a handsome face, and golden eyes, and strong muscles, and... those eyes..." Mabel stopped talking and stared at the kid with a weird kind of desire in her eyes. The kind of desire I saw in her eyes when she met "Norman", her first ever boyfriend, who turned out to be a bunch of gnomes. Only this time her eyes were sparkling.

"Oh, boy." I sighed. "Mabel, we can't just-"

"It's decided!" my sister exclaimed, then she stood up. "Arise, my gorgeous knight!" she announced, as if it would do something.

And as it turned out, it did.

(Chapter written by 'a Mysterious Illusion)