Cigarette

I had stopped and finally began in my third year. It had started in the summer before entering my third year when I went shopping alone in London.

I used floo, entering the Leaky Cauldron and then left the magical world completely. I never knew what made me leave the house, and I never understood how I hadn't gotten caught by Mum, but I definitely did leave the house without any consequences.

It was the first time being alone away from my mum and dad and all of my brothers, and I felt completely absorbed by the whole city. I was only thirteen, and it felt wonderful.

I tell myself now that I stopped acting a complete fool over myself because Hermione told me to get a move on with my life, but I have to remember… I really started acting like who I am when I ran away from everything that was holding me back.

It was big and loud and scary, yet so peaceful. There were so many people just walking around, ignoring everyone else in the world as they headed to the next place they needed to go in their lifetime. I almost got run over by a mini cooper, but a man that looked to be sixteen pulled me out of the way before it hurt or killed me.

His grip was so hard on my waist when he forced me off the street that he ripped my new purple dress. I loved that dress, and since it was torn along my torso he could see all the way down to my lacy blue boy-shorts. I was almost embarrassed, but then he smiled apologetically and offered to buy me an even better jumper at whatever store I wanted to go into.

He looked at me like I was a person who mattered, and that made me not able to talk. He asked if I was alright as he bit his dark pink lip. There was a bit of acne along his nose and forehead and his bottom teeth were crooked. I told him that he saved my life and was in a bit of a shock, and then asked for his name. It was Heath and mine was Ginny, and as we shopped for a green mini-dress, he told me that whomever was steering the car was mental, because who could hurt a fiery girl like Ginny? His flaws went away as he said this, and for the rest of the night I didn't make out a single blemish or tooth gone awry.

Then, I didn't know exactly what he meant. Was it my hair, my personality, or just my bright red lips? Heath looked me over, silent for a moment, and then replied. It was the combination of it all that made me fiery.

We hung out the whole day, looking through family-owned businesses. It was his birthday, and his friends had forgotten, he said, obviously upset. Under my breath, I told him that I was sorry and could relate. I had family that got in the way of friendships.

We sat on a park bench, watching children run together on the lawn. They played hide-and-seek behind trees and bushes. There was a small lake in front of us with loud birds and echoes of the screaming kids. He had offered me a cigarette, but I was afraid I might embarrass myself by coughing. I declined.

Heath didn't think I was a thirteen year old the way he looked at me. He was sixteen or seventeen. I knew for sure because he wore a sweatshirt with the writing 'Year Thirteen… Finally.' It was a joke, I knew, but I couldn't stop staring at his chest where it showed his grade.

I would never want to go away from my school, but he seemed more than fond of leaving his. Hogwarts will always be more interesting than muggle schools, I decided.

He saved me from the car at noon, and it was 6 o'clock when I finally told him that I needed to leave. He offered to walk me home. I had laughed and thanked him again for saving my life and buying me new clothes but that I really had to go. I mentioned something about how my house was too far away and that I would get a taxi in a few minutes.

He was about to offer to haul me one when I said I needed to check something at this one inn I knew and that it was really nice meeting him, but really, he should leave. Heath seemed upset and impressed, and didn't push anything.

I had waved and smiled with a huge amount of confidence. When I turned away from him I made sure my long and wavy ruby hair swung down my back like I had seen all of the older girls from Hogwarts do in the presence of a male.

Then he grabbed my small wrist with one of his big hands, making me stop in mid-strut. His voice sounded urgent and frantic as he asked for a number. My auburn eyebrows scrunched together as I told him I had no idea what he meant. I left him alone in the middle of a sidewalk, cars speeding by and whipping his mop of dark hair in the wind while he stood there, turning cold and miserable as he scratched his head, watching me turn the corner of the street with hips swinging as I went.

He was the first boy I left.

And instead of feeling scared, naïve, and desolate as I walked to the Leaky Cauldron fireplace and took floo back to the Burrow before my family came home, I felt full and controlling. I was excited because I had discovered something about myself that would change me as a person.

I needed change, and there it was. I had command for the first time in my life and no one could take it away. I was free. I was powerful.

I still am.