Summary: I was thinking one day and something came to my mind. What would happen if I stuck Naruto characters in nursery rhymes? Well, this is what came forth.
Disclaimer: I do not own any Naruto characters, nor do I own the nursery rhymes/songs that will be mentioned in this fanfiction.
Warnings: The genres of each chapter/rhyme/song will vary. So beware if one moment it's hardcore angst and the next it's utter crack. There will be occasion bad language. That is one of the main reasons why this is rated T.
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Mother Goose
Ten Little Ninja in a Bed
Genre: Humor/Friendship
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It was nighttime in Konohagakure, the Village Hidden in the Leaves, and the citizens were all at peace, asleep in their beds, comforted by the assurance that their lives were safe, being protected at all times by their highly skilled shinobi (commonly known as ninja).
Our favorite little ball of sunshine, like the sun, went down when the moon came out. Uzumaki Naruto had been vigorously training all day to achieve his goals of beating his ultimate rival and teammate, Uchiha Sasuke, as well as becoming top dog, THE Hokage of Konoha. Right now, he, for a lack of a better term, was pooped and was enjoying some much deserved rest when the sound of knocking disturbed his slumber.
KNOCK KNOCK!
With sleep clouded eyes he shifted his covers aside, shivering as the cold air of his small apartment hit his skin, and shuffled to the door opening it to reveal a scowling Sasuke, a drowsy Sakura, and a sheepish Kakashi.
"Yesh?" questioned a half-asleep Naruto. He looked from one face to another, looking for a reason as to why they were all at his front step at some ungodly time, depriving him from his precious sleep. The two teens both looked at the team's sensei, volunteering him for interrogation.
"Well you see," he paused momentarily to chuckle nervously at the blank look on Naruto's face, so much unlike his norm that is was unsettling, before continuing, "There was this octopus and it—" only to be interrupted by a very irritated student's foot smashing into his own, followed by 3 sets of glares. "Maa, maa. No need to be so harsh."
Naruto motioned with an aggravated expression for him to continue.
"Turns out the Uchiha manor was being remodeled so little Sasuke-kins here pleaded with me to stay over and who was I to refuse such a cute pair of bambi eyes?," By now said Uchiha was fuming mad and ready to kill his "dear" teacher for such... disgusting acquisitions. "And Sakura here was tragically left behind after her parents decided to vamoose and spend the rest of their lives in Antarctica without her—"
Insert a punch in the side delivered by one seriously pissed off kunoichi and a muttered, "They're only on vacation you crazed baka-sensei." Kakashi winced in pain behind his mask. She sure had gotten stronger in the past year.
"So I, graciously, allowed them to stay over at my apartment. And long story short, apparently turning the temperature up on the oven doesn't cook the food faster... it just ends up setting your apartment on fire. Who'd have known? Heh." More nervously chuckling as he rubbed the back of his head awkwardly.
Everyone present almost face-palmed at his stupidity.
"Can we stay over dobe?"
"Meh. Shure teme."
If Naruto was more conscious he wouldn't have taken Sasuke's insult lightly, but all he wanted to do right now was collapse back into his cozy bed and sleep.
He led them into his humble abode and immediately dove under his still warm covers. The small troupe behind him sweat-dropped and wondered where they were to sleep, each looking at the others they shrugged and followed Naruto's example by getting in his bed.
Like hell they were going to sleep on his creaky, spring-loaded couch or the cold, hard floor.
Naruto vaguely noticed the giant dip on the right side of the bed, but was too far off in La La Land to take it into account.
Soon it was back to the serene scene it had been before and all was well.
For now.
KNOCK KNOCK!
A sense of déjà vu sweep over Naruto as he, once again, woke up to the sound of someone knocking on his front door. Only this time, he found three other bodies in the bed next to him. Not caring, he crawled over them to get to the other side of his apartment where his door was located.
He opened it to see Kiba standing there with a grimace set on his face, dead set against asking Naruto of all people for help, but he had to.
"My ma kicked me out. Can I stay over?"
Naruto looked back inside to the people inhabiting his bed. Turning back to Kiba he felt a bit of satisfaction of having dog boy come to him for help. With a smug smirk (a semblance to a certain dark avenger, not that Naruto would ever admit to it) and nodded, "Only if you can find room on the bed."
Kiba trailed behind the kitsune. Watching Naruto climb in he surveyed the occupants and strategically wormed his way over Kakashi and Sakura to curl up, similarly to a canine, at the end of Sasuke's feet.
And once again peace reigned over—
KNOCK KNOCK!
Swearing to himself he flopped out of bed clumsily and staggered to the door (again).
Opening it, he got a face full of double-dee's. Yawning widely, he mumbled, "W'at do you wan', baa-chaaan?"
Tsunade merely snorted in contempt and spoke down to his hunched figure.
"Gaki. Shizune's been bugging me about paperwork all night and I need my sleep."
In his head Naruto was almost in tears. SO DO I!
Sigh. "Fine, w'atever. Jus' get 'nside."
The both made it back in. Naruto ended up leaping over the mass of bodies to his open spot and Tsunade squeezed herself in between Kakashi and Sakura.
...is anyone going to interrupt me?
No? Good.
So all was quiet in the home of one Uzumaki Naruto—
KNOCK KNOCK!
You've got to be kidding me!
Growling, Naruto, yet again, got out of bed this time stomping across the hardwood and throwing open the door surprising the shy Hyuuga heiress that stood on the front porch. Out of shock, she promptly fainted into her older cousin's waiting arms as he glared at the cause of her most recent (and most common) department from the land of the aware.
"Uzumaki..." Neji growled warningly at him as Naruto started to freak out the minute Hinata up and "kicked the bucket" on him. "Just let us in so we can sleep." Naruto looked up at him curiously and a little upset. Was there even enough room on his bed for more people?
"Why did you come over here?"
"Because," Irritated exhale. "Apparently Hanabi-sama discovered the innovation of "rock music" and decided that everyone in the Hyuuga compound should be able to enjoy the magic of loud blaring instruments and meaningless lyrics of how life is strictly about the illegal use of drug substances, sexual activities, and more loud blaring instruments." Please note the sarcasm used in this particular explanation. How wonderful it is indeed.
Naruto nodded feeling a little offended, having a similar love for that particular genre of music. He moved aside and Neji strutted in, holding his cousin bridle-style. Surveying the positions of everyone present, he felt the safest place for Hinata-sama was between himself and Sakura, who he was positive, would do nothing harmful towards Hinata.
That also meant that he would be next to the big-chested Hokage, but he had to make sacrifices if it was meant for Hinata-sama's protection.
Naruto, being the smart little monkey he is, did not crawl back into bed and waited for who ever else was going to wake him up and low and behold, not but 2 minutes later...
KNOCK KNOCK!
Sighing in defeat he practically crawled to the door, feeling more hatred towards that one inanimate object then he ever felt towards anyone/thing else. Opening it up, he found a half-asleep Shikamaru. Naruto poked him back awake enough for him to drawl out, "Can I crash here? My mom's nagging me... troublesome."
They both heard the unmistakable voice of Tsunade behind them as she snored out, "Tell me 'bout it."
Shikamaru just sauntered in, hands in his pockets, back hunched, practically sleeping while he walked to the bed. It's amazing the skill you can acquire from napping as much as him. You learn to consciously, sleep-walk. How's that for a paradox?
He found an open spot at the end of people's head and he rested the top half of his body against the wall stretching his legs along the width of the mattress.
Done observing Naruto was about to close the door, but when he turned he found Sai standing on his doorstep.
"Is this what they call a "slumber party"? It's a rather strange concept. But then again, you are also strange, dickless."
Naruto scowled.
"Just get in."
Sai smiled a big fat fake smile and skipped into Naruto's apartment. Naruto groaned wonder how he can be so awake when it's so late out. It must have been a weird Sai-thing he deduced.
Finally figuring that there was no one else who could come in and bother him as there was NO way that anyone else could fit on his small bed he crawled back under the sheets and duvet for as much sleep as he could get before he had to get up for training in the morning.
There were ten in a bed and the little one said
"Roll over, roll over"
So they all rolled over and one fell out
It was way too crowded for ten people on the small bed. So Naruto mumbled out a groggy, "Roll over, roll over 'tebayo," And made a sigh of relief as there was an audible plunk that was Shikamaru being pushed off the bed and onto the floor. Not even stirring, the lazy-ass ninja continued to snooze.
There were nine in a bed and the little one said
"Roll over, roll over"
So they all rolled over and one fell out
Now it was too hot! Sasuke was almost completely on him and breathing his too hot breath right on Naruto face. Too close for Naruto's comfort if you ask him.
"Roll over, roll over 'tebayo."
Naruto kicked Sasuke, sending down a chain that ended up with Kakashi on the floor. Snorting he awoke, looked at the bed, and walked over to the couch laying there instead.
There were eight in a bed and the little one said
"Roll over, roll over"
So they all rolled over and one fell out
Naruto groaned. Why was there still not enough space?
"Roll over, roll over 'tebayo."
It also seemed like Sasuke was trying to get away from Sakura who, even in her sleep was trying to cling to her treasured Sasuke-kun. He kicked her again, sending Tsunade to the floor this time.
"What the hell?! Ugh. Damn brats."
She trudged to the couch and removed Kakashi, plopping down in his place.
Kakashi looked up and found the risks of reclaiming the couch over weighing the pros. So he stayed on the floor. Lucky there was a rug under him to act as padding.
There were seven in a bed and the little one said
"Roll over, roll over"
So they all rolled over and one fell out
Now Naruto's legs were cramping up from lack of foot room. Cause being: Sai.
"Roll over, roll over 'tebayo." A light nudge and Sai flopped off. Hmm... Naruto had always wanted to kick Sai. So what if he was not aware of his surroundings? It's not Naruto's fault! He should have been a better ninja. He deserved to sleep on the floor.
There were six in a bed and the little one said
"Roll over, roll over"
So they all rolled over and one fell out
It was still too hot with six in his moderately normal sized (read: tiny) bed. So Naruto garbled out, "Roll over, roll over 'tebayo."
Sasuke was still pushing away from Sakura, which ended up with, you guessed it, Neji finding the hard contact of wood flooring. Blinking up, the ceiling seemed much higher up then before he looked up to the bed confused at how he ended up on the floor.
There were five in a bed and the little one said
"Roll over, roll over"
So they all rolled over and one fell out
"Roll over, roll over 'tebayo."
Neji didn't have too much time to ponder this as Hinata seemed to fall from the sky onto him. Coughing from the sudden lack of air, he sat up and moved himself and Hinata to the open chair across from the couch where Tsunade lay snoring like a dragon in her lair.
There were four in a bed and the little one said
"Roll over, roll over"
So they all rolled over and one fell out
An incoherent, "Roll over, roll over 'tebayo," was heard and Sasuke seemed to realize that Kiba was laying on him after he could no longer feel his toes. So, irritated, he kicked him off the bed.
Kiba landed next to Sai and must have mistaken the emotionless artist for Akamaru, because the next second he was clinging to Sai like he was a giant teddy bear.
There were three in a bed and the little one said
"Roll over, roll over"
So they all rolled over and one fell out
Naruto grunted as he heard Sakura talking in her sleep about... what else? Sasuke. Grumbling, he moaned out tiredly, "Roll over, roll over 'tebayo." And feeling very annoyed, he reached across the dark avenger and pushed her (gently) off the bed, where she rolled twice to get into a comfortable position on her side.
There were two in a bed and the little one said
"Roll over, roll over"
So they all rolled over and one fell out
Now it was only him and Sasuke on the bed, but Sasuke was hogging all the blankets.
"Roll over, roll over 'tebayo."
He took much enjoyment in rolling the duck-butt ninja off of the bed. And hearing the satisfying 'Clunk' just made him smile sleepily.
There was one in a bed and the little one said
"I'm lonely, I'm lonely"
Okay, what's wrong with him now?
He finally got the bed to himself and now he couldn't sleep.
He frowned; it was too cold in the bed alone. "I'm lonely, I'm lonely 'tebayo," he muttered to himself sadly.
So he rolled over and joined his friends on the floor
OWARI!
First one is done! I'm soo~o tired, you have no idea. I took time out of my sleep (ironically enough) and homework time to type this up. And now I have a whole fucking project to finish by tomorrow!
TT____TT
This one will probably be one of the more lengthy ones. I'm not even sure how it became such a big thing (9 pages, by-da-way)! It was kinda unexpected.
I have some stories planned out already but I'm willing to take suggestions. Just tell me either what rhyme, song, character(s), and/or pairing(s) you would like to see and I'll try to add it in here eventually.
Notice: I will let you know right now though that I may be hesitant of some pairings. I'll try to be flexible though so even if you think I won't like it, I'll try to make something up.
I live to make you all happy! :D (Do you know how needy you people are?)
-Luffly Emi