Come on, Get Higher
By popular demand, here it is.
Ashley hugged Andy as tightly as he could for a long moment before letting him go with a painful reluctance. Andy had to go back to tour… Ashley had to stay home. The facts of the job were facts but that didn't make it any easier to let Andy go. Andy turned to go to the plane that would carry him all the way across the country to New York and the rest of the band but he spun back around and pressed his lips to Ashley's in a desperate kiss. Ashley clenched his fists as he forced himself to watch Andy walk away.
I miss the sound of your voice
And I miss the rush of your skin
The plane had just taken off and Andy found himself missing Ashley all over again. He couldn't believe it. He missed the smooth cadence of Ashley's voice and the slight accent that was barely noticeable. He missed the soft skin of Ashes body and the rough calluses on his fingers from years of playing guitars. He pulled out his iPod and set it to a song that Ash had recorded just for him. He relaxed in his seat as he closed his eyes and tried to pretend like Ash was right there, like he would be there when Andy opened his eyes. He drifted into sleep…
And I miss the still of the silence
As you breathe out and I breathe in
It was late, for the normal population anyway. The sun had long since set but Ashley was wide awake. Trying to adjust to normal hours has difficult for the nearly nocturnal rock star… it was even harder alone. He lay in his bed staring at the ceiling. The silence was eerie and haunting without the soft sound of Andy's breathing beside him. It was such a strange feeling that it rather unnerved Ashley.
If I could walk on water
If I could tell you what's next
Andy stood at the bay in New York. It was beautiful as the city lights danced over the moving water. In a moment like this he wanted nothing more to grab Ashley's hand and drag him into the icy waves with him. He wrapped his arms around himself, he was alone here, Ashley was far away. He wished he knew what was to become of them. This separation was ripping him apart.
I'd make you believe
I'd make you forget
Ashley went out for coffee the next morning, well noon. He didn't go because he particularly wanted to but because he knew Andy would want him to. Without the band or Andy to entertain him and having sworn off women and boos for the mean time he was left with nothing but his troubling thoughts. He knew that his relationship with Andy was balanced on a knife point. They were both men, they were in the same band… their relationship was at the mercy of the fan bass and the schedule. He wanted Andy to be here. He wanted to hold him and kiss him and make Andy and himself forget that there was anything but them. He wanted so badly so believe that they had forever…
So come on, get higher, loosen my lips
Faith and desire and the swing of your hips
After the show Andy lay on his bed staring at the ceiling, unusually he was sober, utterly and completely. He wasn't stupid enough to think that alcohol would help him forget how much he missed Ashley… nothing could do that. He wanted Ash here to kiss him and hold him to make him forget, as he always did, that there was anything wrong in the world. He missed the way his hips moved when he walking, the way it made him crazy. He missed the smirks Ashley gave him and the breathless kisses they could bestow. He missed everything.
Just pull me down hard
And drown me in love
Ashley texted Andy. They were in near constant chat but it wasn't the same. The words couldn't quite cover the loneliness. Andy still wasn't here. They was no one to make him forget everything. No crystal blue eyes to sparkle brighter than the sky. Without Andy it was like the rain and come, the sun was hiding, and even the rainbow had gone away. All he wanted was to be back in Andy's arms… to drown himself in his love.
So come on, get higher, loosen my lips
Faith and desire and the swing of your hips
Andy had to fight to keep himself in the moment. His fans needed him to be there for them but it was so hard without Ashley beside him. It was crazy how you didn't realize how much you missed someone until they weren't there. He had once had a friend tell him that… he should have listened to her. Now he could feel the pull of Ashes love from across the country and it tore at his mind. All he wanted was to kiss him, hold him, forget the world.
Just pull me down hard
And drown me in love
Ashley examined his face in the mirror. His jaw was still broken, still wired shut. That would change tomorrow though. He was praying that the doctor would clear him. He wanted nothing more than to fly out to California and be with the guys, with Andy. He wanted to be with Andy… it was ridiculous how much he missed the other man. Ash had always 'gotten down' with any girl willing to give it and now he was in love. Point blank, shot to the heart by that little fucker cupid. He felt like he was drowning in the emotions that swamped him, he wanted Andy's love. For once he wanted more than sex.
I miss the sound of your voice
Loudest thing in my head
The sound of Ashes voice rang through Andy's head louder than if he had yelled it down a corridor. He missed the sweet lilt of it and the soothing effect it always had on him. He listened to the CD Ash had recorded for him but it didn't seem to help. It wasn't quite the same. He missed having him by him and listening to him talk or sing. He reached over and picked up the phone.
And I ache to remember
All the violent, sweet
Perfect words that you said
Ashley blasted Black Veil Brides through his apartment, neighbors be damned. He was playing his bass along with it, trying to distract himself. The music was so loud, even his ears were starting to hurt a little. The sound was finally obliterating the sound of Andy whispering goodbye to him. The words seared through him even if it was only temporary. All the times Andy had said goodbye seemed to be haunting him. No matter how many times he told himself he was over reacting, they would see each other soon, it didn't help.
If I could walk on water
If I could tell you what's next
I'd make you believe
I'd make you forget
Luckily he looked up as the light flashed across the screen of his phone. He dove for it, praying it was Andy. It was. Hey ran across the room and slammed the pause button on his system before addressing the laughing man on the other end of the line.
"Hello Andy," he wanted in that moment to tell Andy everything he felt. Instead he listened to Andy talk, Ashley couldn't talk about his true feelings anymore than he could walk on water. The sound of Andy's voice forced away the loneliness and Ashley clung to the phone like a life line.
So come on, get higher, loosen my lips
Faith and desire and the swing of your hips
Just pull me down hard
And drown me in love
After the phone was finally hung up two hours later Andy felt even more miserable. He curled into a ball and closed his eyes. He needed sleep and all he could do was think. His mind just wouldn't stop playing memories…
So come on, get higher, loosen my lips
Faith and desire and the swing of your hips
Just pull me down hard
And drown me in love
Ashley lay in bed waiting for the sun to rise. He wanted the doctor's clearance. He needed to fly! He had to see Andy… he just couldn't handle this, whatever this was. He watched as the sun rose outside his room. For the first time in years, if ever, he rose with it. He went to the kitchen and prepared himself for the day. For once he wanted to go to the doctors… all he wanted was to see Andy.
I miss the pull of your heart
I taste the sparks on your tongue
Andy had no Idea what Ash was doing. He missed him more than he ever thought. Suddenly all the stupid love songs made sense. It seemed like without Ash his heart beat raggedly in his chest, painfully, off beat, like it didn't really want to work anymore. He seemed so much more lethargic or maybe he had the same energy and no where to put it, absolutely no inspiration anymore.
I see angels and devils
And God, when you come on
Hold on, hold on, hold on, hold on
With a triumphant grin Ash boarded the plane. Regretfully he turned off his phone, put on his head phones, and slid down in his seat, settling in for the long ride. He couldn't fathom how someone as beautiful as Andy could cause him pain so ugly. He closed his eyes and spoke silently, hoping that, somehow, impossibly, Andy would hear him. 'hold on love, it won't be long'
So come on, get higher, loosen my lips
Faith and desire and the swing of your hips
Just pull me down hard
And drown me in love
There was a knock on the door and Andy slowly got up to get it. It was probably Jake and CC coming to drag his sorry ass downstairs for some 'fun' it really didn't seem worth it to see the New York with Ash by his side. He didn't look up as he opened the door. Suddenly he felt warm, strong, arms around him. His eyes went wide and his head snapped up. He looked at Ashes bright caramel eyes. There was a long pause. Andy threw his arms around Ashley and slammed his lips against Ashes. Ashley's hands slid down Andy's back until he could hold him by the hips.
It's all wrong, it's all wrong
It's all wrong, it's so right
So come on, get higher
So come on and get higher
There was nothing in the room or even in the world beside Andy's warm skin against his. The silken feel of Andy's full lips against his interrupted only by the cold sting of his lips ring. Andy felt a wild desire and passion that threatened to consume him. Ashley's agile fingers worked over his body and though Ashley did not remove himself from the intense kiss. It seemed like fire was pouring through his lips at the contact point. He was higher than he had ever been. A pure euphoria flooded through them, they may be damned but in this moment it felt more than right, it was perfect…
'Cause everything works, love
Everything works in your arms
Because nothing but love really mattered.