I own nothing
Life as we know it has hit an all time low. The Hair Hunters had grown more vicious; more determined to destroy Bobobo than ever. No one was safe, not even Maria, she just disappeared for no reason. Bobobo and the others broke into five different blocks, and she wasn't in one. Then Venus had disappeared in the middle of the night, they had no chance of finding her. That was about a month ago, they hadn't given up, but got sidetracked, Czar Baldie Bald the Fourth was sending more and more recruits to kill them, then the Czar was assassinated, and the third Czar took his place back. At first, they were sure the old Czar himself took him out, but then someone tried to assassinate Czar the Third. If Don Patch hadn't startled the assassin, who was now in jail, then it would have happened. Bobobo kicked Don Patch for ten blocks cause of that. It's not just that... There have been strange things happening, more of the Czar's guards are being targeted, the Hair Hunters are mostly killing people rather than hair hunting them now. Everything was getting worse. They've lost Maria and Venus, and they didn't know when they would get them back. Bobobo repeatedly says they're being watched, but can never find anything. There seems to be something no one really knows about going on, they were certain they were done, till they got this note...
Come to the Orichalky Castle and ask for SS.
It was vague, quick, and simple instructions. Beauty read and reread the note, her blue eyes scanning it. The Spring air was calming, it had just finished raining, the ground was covered in mud. Hatenko and Softon were leading the way, Bobobo was being carried by Don Patch and Jelly Jiggler, who were wearing kimonos and wigs. Her and Heppokomaru were in the back, making sure they didn't run off.
"Do you have any idea who it's from?"
She looked up to Heppo, then shook her head, "Not a clue, but Soften said he knew the way. I just hope Bobobo doesn't do anything stupid."
"Aren't you forgetting someone?" Dengakuman was just following them. "Don't I have an important part?" Just stand there and look cute. "Okay!"
"Who are you talking to?!" Jelly Jiggler kicked him out of his way. He flew and hit Hatenko in the back of his head. He scowled at the jelly, who turned away, whistling.
"Who does this SS guy think he is anyway?!" Don Patch shouted, "Trying to make me play hide and seek! I'll show him! No one messes with this show's main character! When I find this guy; he'll be begging more mercy!"
We zoom out to see them on a TV screen, the shadows of two figures studying them.
"You know what to do."
"Yes, m'am."
The Orichalky Castle was around three stories, green roof, eggshell paper walls, but on the sign, Orichalky was marked out in black, the word 'Bacon' written on it in red paint. There were aliens on the outside, barbecuing bacon with pigs at picnic tables, eating.
"WHAT IS THIS?! DON'T THEY KNOW WHAT THEIR EATING!?"
An alien looked up at them, then pointed to the door, which was shaped like an chicken.
"... I'm not gonna bother..."
Inside, it was bar, filled with stuffed bears, all glaring at them.
"Alright! Listen up!" Don Patch yelled. His anger had grown. Dressed as a high school delinquent and holding a baseball bat. "Which one of you sorry saps is SS?"
The bartender, another bear, lifted an empty glass on counter, pressing the button underneath.
The floor beneath their feet gave in.
"AAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHH!"
"I CAN FLY! I CAN FLY! I CAN FLY!"
Bobobo, Beauty, Soften, and Hatenko landed safely on the blow up mat. Gasser, Don Patch, Jelly Jiggler, and Dengakuman landed hardly on the floor right beside it.
Beauty placed a hand on her head, looking around, "Everybody okay?"
Don Patch got up, a dark shadow overcasting his eyes, he calmly walked over to Beauty, and slapped her repeatedly,
"What do you think!? Didn't you just see us fall twenty feet?! I'm not even that stupid!"
"Getcha hands off of her!" Bobobo slammed a giant hammer against Don Patch's jaw, sending him to slam against the roof, and hit the ground hard.
Everyone looked around, the room was dark, silver walls, hard silver floor.
"I bet if we dug up the flooring, we'd make more than we ever did on this show!"
"What's that?"
A chair sat in the middle of the room, purple fur and dark mahogany. Above it a box floated in mid air, it had mirror walls, reflecting back at them.
Beauty's eyes had popped out of her head, "That's one way to deliver!"
Someone giggled, "You should see a doctor about that."
She had silky black hair with a red tint that reached her thighs, fire red eyes, very pale complexion. She was wearing a short blood red skirt, like a schoolgirl's but shorter than that. Her blouse was the same color of red, button down, but the buttons wear covered by ruffles, the sleeves to her wrist, tight. A two blood red rose barrettes were in her hair, red choker collar around her neck. Red see through stalkings, and strangely, red sneakers.
She had her elbows on her knees, her head in her hands, smirking at them.
"I knew this was a trap!"
Inside the box, three watched intently. The first one was the oldest, she had sea blue eyes, her lavender purple locks reached her back, some draping over her shoulder. She was a bit skinnier than the other two, but only taller than the last one. She was wearing a red blouse with tight short sleeves. A blue denim skirt with a brown belt. Thick white tights and black sneakers. She was staring intently at Don Patch, expecting him to do something. What truly stood out on her outfit was the golden heart buckle on her belt, it shinned a pink light every now and then, annoying the girl beside her. Venus Rompecorazones.
The one in the middle was the tallest and palest. She had her blue green eyes set on Heppokomaru and Beauty. Her hair was to her shoulder, a few shades darker than cinnamon, with dark purple streaks. She had on a purple tank top that matched her highlights. Denim short with black suspenders. The suspenders had a Jack Skellington design on them, showing a more childish side. She tapped one of her purple high tops on the carpet floor, biting her lip. Experiment 13.
The last one was fairly short, a fair skin complexion. She had her eyes on Bobobo. She had long dark redish brown hair, fair skin, and large chocolate brown eyes. She was wearing a light black shirt with a pink bow undone under the collar. White skirt with a single pink stripe across the bottom, long white socks, and ruby red flats. A red beret on her head, a giant paintbrush was under her arm. It was cleaned for now. Shelly. "Do you think we should help her?"
"You heard the boss. Her and her only."
Our heroes hadn't moved from their spots, not leaving eye contact with the girl. She threw her head back and laughed.
"What's so funny?" Don Patch asked. "The main character has a right to know!"
"He sure does!" A foot collided with Don Patch's head, he flew to he ceiling, only to bounce back down. Bobobo lowered his foot, "I'm guessing you called this meeting?"
She shrugged, standing from the chair, she smirked. "The name's Karma. You're the one that defeated my father?" She laughed more.
Don Patch, dressed as a lawyer, yelled out, "I demand to know your father! I'll sue for everything you've got!"
"You're no lawyer!" Beauty yelled.
"Czar the Third." She said it as if it was a joke. " Tsuru Tsurulina. The head honcho."
There was a pause. Then Don Patch pulled an onion out of nowhere and charged her. "You've pleaded guilty!"
A vain popped out of her head. She stood without a word and kicked Don Patch when he was close enough. He bounced from the ceiling to the floor, then bounced to a wall.
Karma showed a sadistic smile, staring at Bobobo. "You're my target."
In the box. . .
Thirteen crossed her arms with a smirk. "This is gonna be a popcorn fight. Like when people fight over the internet."
"Should we call Aura?" Shelly asked. "Or Lucky? They'll want know that they are here."
"They're gonna be pissed."
Meanwhile at the Chrome Dome Empire...
He had messy dark brown hair. Large purple eyes, a mocha complexion, and a Cheshire smile. A green shirt with yellow strips and baggy black jeans. He had on black socks and beige sandals. His goggles were up on his forehead, messing up his hair even more. He was sitting on top of a pedestal, keeping his legs on the concrete. Tango. Beside him was a bomb with arms and legs. He had narrow blue eyes and a short fuse. Shango. On the pedestal opposite of them was a female. She had straight long purple hair in a ponytail that resembled a wolfs tail. Her bangs were matching purple and her silver eyes seemed to glow in the dim light. Her skin was light peach. She was wearing a sleeveless gray shirt with claw marks on the front and back. Black Capri pants with a white 'X' on the left side and black boots with three white stripes across each. Aura. She made eye contact with Tango, then motioned to the table.
The table beneath them held the top seven block leaders. Please listen as the narrator lists them off. (He showed up when we told him not to; he's gotta do something now.)
A Block Leader- Sisper Fel Fonfen
B Block Leader- Lambada
C Block Leader- Jeda The Wind God
D Block Leader- Yuki Onna
E Block Leader- Combat Blues
F Block Leader- Ujikin TOKIO
G Block Leader- Rose-Lily Kikunojō
Most of them looked nervous. That made Aura smirk. The boss hadn't arrived yet.
"Damn it!" Lily banged his fist against the round table, "No matter how many troops we send, we can never catch that bastard!"
They meant Bobobo of course. He had been giving every block trouble, what was worse was the boss was coming down on them hard. If they couldn't catch him, they were dead.
Yuki rolled her eyes, "I don't get why we can't kill this guy! He's like an Omen!"
"You're one to talk."
"Shut it, we've got another problem! The powers down in the torture room so we can't investigate that little brat that tried to take out Czar Blad!"
"Who cares? Just stuff him in an oven!"
"Silence, soldiers! We're out of coffee in the break room and those mini donuts!"
"We're talking about war; what is wrong with you!?"
"I guess Fishcake was what kept them together." Aura muttered. She made a few hand movements to Tango and Shango, who nodded in understanding.
Distract them.
"Super Fist of Fairy Tales... Karma jumped in the air. She radiated a blue aura. "Glass Slipper Spears!" A few dozen glass slippers materialized from thin air, the tips of these slippers were sharper than knifes. With the movement of her arms, Karma sent the slippers toward Bobobo.
Bobobo grabbed Don Patch and Jelly, throwing them towards the slippers. While they hit Don Patch full on while they passed right through Jelly Jiggler, hitting Bobobo. Beauty yelled, her voice making Karma annoyed.
"It's time to shut up pinky." Karma snapped. She raised her hands out to the ceiling. "Super Fist of Fairy Tales Golden Egg Frenzy!"
They were size of geese eggs and appeared to be made of solid gold. Money signs replaced the eyes of our three heroines. "You want these?" Karma questioned. They nodded there heads energetically. Don Patch and Bobobo held out a giant bag. "Let us have it!"
Karma chuckled once more. "As you wish." She snapped her fingers. The eggs became plummeting down to them. An egg smashed into the side of Don Patch's jaw, sending him flying across the room. These eggs were pure gold alright, and they bared the weight of the component.
Venus tisked. "She can be so cruel."
"What do you want her to do? Play tea party?" Thirteen scoffed. "This will be a fun fight."
Meanwhile at the Chrome Dome Empire...
"BAD IDEA! BAD IDEA! BAD IDEA!"
Aura flinched as she heard Tango and Shango, she hoped they could hold on long enough for her to get their friend. He was the type that preferred to stay inside, so his complexion was rather pale. His black hair was cropped to his neck and he was sporting a single red streak through it. His red overcoat was tattered and his white long sleeved shit was faded. There were holes along his dark red pants, his legs were bruised. His tie was missing as were his shoes.
Darkcaster waved at her, his face keeping the same expression.
"You okay, Darkcaster?"
"I've been thrown in cage, interrogated by morons, beaten by many of soldiers, and have not eaten in about three days. I feel wonderful."
Aura was clearly annoyed by his sarcasm. She took a few steps back. "You might wanna back up."
He didn't need to be told twice. Aura charged the bars, landing a kick and breaking the lock.
"Nice."
"Thank you, now let's get Tango and hurry back to HQ. You know who should be arriving soon."
Since it seems like a happy ending here, lets go back and check on Bobobo...
"All right now, don't sprain something!" Karma laughed. "Dodge all you want, these golden goodies go wherever I want them to." More eggs materialized, she sent them hurling.
"That's it, Karma. Time for Snotforu!" Bobobo took his traditional pose. His aura radiating yellow. "Super Fist of the Nose Hair!"
"BOBOBO BANK!"
It was shaped like Bobobo's Afro and the same bright yellow. Don Patch and Jelly were dressed as baseball players, they were hitting the eggs into a rectangular slot in the bank. There was a digital counter on the bank, reading 639 EGGS.
Karma seemed taken back. "Your... bats aren't breaking?" This made her angry. Her aura grew stronger. "Super Fist of Fairy Tales! Seven Dwarfs of Fairy Tales!"
The seven stood there, awaiting command, but they didn't look harmless, with the exception of one.
Jelly guffawed, he walked towards the shortest dwarf. "This is your attack?" He poked the little guy.
Karma crossed her arms. A blunt expression on her face, "Knifey?"
The dwarf in front of Jellly pulled three knifes out of nowhere. Within seconds Jelly was pinned to the wall.
"Karate. Boxing. Don Patch."
I would feel sorry for Don Patch, but he owes me twenty bucks for lunch!
"Beaty. Snakes. Rocky. Bobobo."
Beaty hand a bat in one hand and golf club in the other. Snakes had... well... snakes. Three to be exact. Each were sporting very large fangs. Rocky was the largest of the dwarfs, he held a single rock in each hand.
Rocky walked until he was in front of Bobobo, holding out each hand. "Pick one."
"WHAT?" Karma flinched at Beauty's yell.
"Left."
Rocky stared down at his hands. He clenched his left fist, and threw the rock in his right.
Beauty sighed as the fighting began. "This doesn't make any sense."
"Flowers!" Karma's eyes moved back and forth from Beauty and Bobobo. "Have fun."
Flowers showed a sinister smile. He pulled a flamethrower from out of his pocket.
"Barbecue!"
The flames scorched Don Patch, when Flowers backed away, there was a plate of sushi.
Karma ignored this. "Now Bobobo I'm curious." Said hero was still fighting three of the dwarfs. "You've defeated so many of the hair hunters, thousands of attacks that you seem to pull out of nowhere. And you can't handle a sixteen year old girl?" She smirked. "If you don't mind, point me to the direction of man that defeated my father."
Bobobo didn't like the insult. "That's it!" He grabbed Rocky and threw him at Karma. She caught him, throwing him at Don Patch.
"Now what did I do?!"
"There's one big flaw with your super fist, Karma, can you guess what it is?"
She crossed her arms over her chest. "I can't think of anything. Super Fist of Fairy Tales! Wonderland!"
At that moment, the world around Bobobo faded away. Beauty yelled as she lost sight of the Baka trio. Karma had transported them to a discreet location. It truly looked like the inside of fairy tale. The sun was bright, the trees seemed lively and everything was colored more vividly. Don Patch stared down at his hands. "What's with the drawers?"
"Everything's drawn like this in fairy tales." Karma informed them. She was dressed in a green kimono, her hair pulled up into a bun. "This land was made by me and... a good friend. Bobobo, it's story time." She motioned to the castle behind her. "There are five stories I have you can choose from. You each get one choice. I'd be very careful when chosing."
Five torii's rose from the earth. Each had the name of the tale carved into it. Little Red Riding Hood. Snow White and Red Rose. The Three Little Men In The Wood. Cat and Mouse In Partnership. Hansel and Gretel.
"This will be easy!" Don Patch pointed to the third one. "There are three of us and we're already in the woods!"
Karma snapped her fingers and the scene changed.
Don Patch stood outside an old cottage, it was the middle of winter and Don had a small straw basket. "Excuse me young man." A dwarf tapped Don Patch. "Could you do me favor and pick me some strawberries?"
"It's the middle of winter!" Don Patch shouted. He burst into the cottage and saw two other dwarfs playing cards. "Hey let me play!"
When they refused, Don Patch started yelling. He acted like a two year old.
"Such an ungrateful brat!" One of the little men shouted. "I deem that he gets even more ugly everyday!"
"What an annoying little orange!" The second claimed. "I say every time he opens his mouth, a snake shall fall out!"
"He's an improper pauper!" The third yelled. "I declare every time he speaks a toad will pop out!"
"I love this story so much." Karma spoke. "In ancient Greece, you were tought to be kind to everybody, for you didn't know who was a god in disguise."
Don Patch wanted to insult her. However, as soon as he open his mouth, a snake jumped out. He tried yelling, frogs and snakes. No! Don Patch thought, I'll never be able to yodel again!
"You're turn blob." Karma motioned to Jelly. "I'd ask you to think about your choice, but you don't have a brain."
Jelly laughed. "You think you're so smart, but I've got this figured out!"
"Hm?"
"I choose the sixth one!"
A vein popped. Karma pulled out a cricket bat. "Positive?"
Her tone made Jelly shrink back. "I-i-i meant the fifth!"
Snap!
Jelly found himself alone in the woods with a small loaf of bread. "Ah, this is easy, all I have to do is leave a trail of breadcrumbs." A bird flew down to Jelly, picking his... jelly. "Hey, shoo!"
More birds flew up to him, pecking jelly. "Buzz off! Here take the bread!" They didn't want bread.
Jelly starting hitting the birds, which made them mad. They began chasing him around. Jelly would run, the birds would follow.
"This seems familiar..." Karma muttered. "Something with one of the ancient gods..."
Jelly ran until he saw a house. The house had been made out of candy, however, Bobobo and Don Patch had beat Jelly there. The house was already half eaten. Bobobo was gobbling up handfuls of food and every time Don Patch tried to eat anything, a snake would pop out and eat the food in his hands. "You're having dessert without me?"
Karma looked bored. "If you're not going to entertain me, I'm moving this along."
Bobobo was now standing in front of the torii's. Karma smiled, "Any questions before your decision?"
"Who are you?"
At first she seemed confused, but then she nodded. "I work for an organization that's requesting your services. My name is Karma Tsurulina, and I'm the top assassin of the SS. My father is czar the third but my current affiliation with the Hair Hunters is defunct. Usually, I don't use my super fist for carrying out my work, too much mess. Defeat me, and you'll know why you've been called." She bowed in a gracious manner. "Pick a gateway."
Bobobo closed his eyes, his thought swarming from how he could defeat these fairy tales to what he was going to have for dinner. How do you defeat a princess in her wonderland? Wait a minute... that's it!
"It's time for you to meet reality, Karma!" Bobobo generated his yellow aura, taking his signature pose. "Super Fist of the Nose Hair!"
The world started to fade. The colors grew darker and the trees started disappearing. "What are you doing!?" Karma yelled.
"Welcome To The World!"
The trees had been replaced with dark skyscrapers and factories letting exhaust into the air. The grassy meadows were gone and replaced with sidewalks and streets. The pollution had caused a bog in the air. The people weren't happy, they were all grizzly, fighting, and frowning. Karma hugged herself. "My world... you... destroyed my world." She voice was shaking. Her kimono had faded as well, her hair was falling out of her bun.
How is this going to end? What does Bobobo have planned for Karma? Will Don Patch ever be able to open his mouth without something disgusting coming out of it? And what about the snakes? Found out in the next episode of Bobobo-bobo-bobo!
I would like to apologize to everybody that was excited for this story, only for me to quit. If you want more of explaination, for my hands are getting tired, go to my DeviantArt page, Crazypopcornlover.
Until the Next Episode!
