Disclaimer: I do not own any characters or the song!
Kingdom hearts is copyrighted to Square Enix
The internet is for porn is copyrighted to Avenue Q
Cast:
Kate monster-Larxene (or L)
Trekie monster-Axel (or A)
Any others will be represented by their first letter in their name.
L: Finally,(giddy voice) I get to teach a whole lesson all by myself. And I'm going to teach something important. Something modern: the Internet. *gasps*
(sing-song voice) The internet is really, really great.
A: For porn!
L: I've got a fast connection, so I don't have to wait!
A: For porn!
L: What? (looks around) There's always some new site.
A: For porn.
L: I browse all day and night.
A: For porn.
L: (annoyed) It's like I'm surfing at the speed of light.
A: For porn!
L: (yells) AXEL!
A: The internet is for porn.
L: Axel?
A: The internet is for porn.
L: What are you doing?
A: Why do you think the net was born? Porn, porn, porn!
L: Axel!
A: Oh, hi there, Larxene
L: You're ruining my song.
A: Sorry. I didn't mean to.
L: Well, would you mind shutting up for just a minute so I can finish?
A: (whispers) ok.
L: Good. I'm glad we have this new technology.
A: For porn.
L: *sighs* Which gives us golden opportunities!
A: For porn. Crap. Sorry!
L: All on your own desktop.
A: For p…(covers mouth)
L: With research, browse, and shop.
A: *gasps*
L: Until you've had enough, when you're ready to stop!
A: For porn!
L: Axel!
A: The internet is for porn.
L: Uh, nooo.
A: The internet is for porn.
L: Axel.
A: I'm up all night honking my horn to porn, porn, porn!
L: That's disgusting. You're a pervert.
A: Hmph. Sticks and stones Larxene.
L: No, really. You really are a pervert. Normal people don't just look up porn on the internet all day long.
(Axel starts chuckling hysterically)
L: What's so funny?
A: You have NO idea.
(just then, Marluxia, Zexion, Demyx, and Roxas pop out of a dark portal)
A: Ready guys?
M: Ready.
Z: Ready.
D: Ready.
R: Ready.
A: Let's go!
Guys: The internet is for porn.
M: Sorry Larx.
Guys: The internet is for porn.
D: But we have no hearts.
A: All us guys unzip our flies…
Guys: For porn, por-
L: (getting irritated) The internet is not for porn!
Guys: Porn, porn, por-
L: (yells) HOLD ON A SECOND!
A: What?
L: Look. I happen to know that you, Marluxia, you like to check your e-mail online.
M: Right.
L: Zexion, I know you browse and buy books, and magazines on eBay
Z: True
L: Demyx, you always listen to music and download songs onto your ipod.
D: I know.
L: And you, Roxas, check your facebook account all the time.
R: Yeah.
A: Oh? But, Larxene, what do you think that he does after that? Huh?
R: (snickers) yeah.
L: OH MY GOD! (freaks out)
A: C'mon guys.
Guys: The internet is for porn.
L: Gross!
Guys: The internet is for porn.
L: I hate porn.
A: Grab your dick and double-click.
Guys: For porn, porn, porn.
L: I hate you all!
Guys: Foooooorrr…
L: I'm out of here.
Guys: …ooooooorrrr…
L: Ahhh! (disappears)
Guys: The internet is for, internet is for, internet is for porn! Yeah!