Hi!
Ok, this is a companion piece to 'Parallels'. Elizabeth's POV. Set in the mystic's shack at the end of DMC. Spoilers - you have been warned.
Reviews always welcome.
Betrayal
She had to do it. There was no other way, no other solution.
Get rid of him, and that thrice-damned compass. Destroy all the evidence. Deny it had ever happened. Like a naughty child hiding the ruined dress: out of sight, out of mind.
She hadn't truly intended to kiss him, though. That was not part of her guilty, dirty little plan. That was not to say it didn't fit.
The guilt burnt on her lips. Well, yes. The kiss had been planned. Planned to persuade him over to the mast. But this had not been planned. The salty aftertaste, the lingering wonder if she had done the right thing; Will's reaction. Did he know what she had blinded herself to? Did he know where the compass pointed when she held it in her hand?
Or did he know she was lying in more ways than one? Could Will expect that Jack would stay behind? Maybe he suspected; felt betrayed twice over. With a single kiss she had sealed Jack's fate, and tainted her reputation. Did Will see both evils, or just one? She had no desire to ask him. Had no way of drawing that courage from deep within herself. She was scoured out, hollow.
"Yes."
Yes, she would go. Had no other option but to search him out. She needed answers. Answers she feared she had locked away with a clink of a manacle.
She wanted to see where the compass pointed when he held it.
She wanted to explain. Wanted to see if he forgave her. If he understood.
But for now, a yes was all she could muster. She saw Will lift the cup to his lips. Another man she needed answers from. But not now. Not tonight. Not for a while could she settle what she had done in her own mind, let alone throw herself open to him, and his inevitable anger.
She sat a long time, rocking and shivering, consumed in her private battles. She had done it to save them. Save him. She had to save Will because she loved him. But she didn't want him. Tried to save him from knowing the direction of her private compass, while at the same time saving his life.
She had achieved neither.
He had seen and he was not saved. None of them were. And Jack was gone.
She had betrayed them both.
No, 'both' was wrong. There was a third party here. Yet another bedraggled soul she had denied 'the right thing'. She had betrayed herself. She needed no occult compass to show her which way she was going. She had betrayed herself, even as she gave herself what she wanted.
And, selfishly she thought, this was the worst betrayal of all.